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Ch 2: Hug it out



Snape had fallen asleep in Harry’s lap on the floor of the boy’s childhood home. Tear ridden eyes had proved too heavy for the former death-eater and against his better judgment he had drifted off to a restful place he very seldom got to visit.

“How are you?” A soft voice announced it’s presence behind them.

Harry’s face broke into a large grin. “Mom? You’re still here?”

“I’m always here Harry; you just don’t always have direct access to me. I came to see how you two were getting on.”

“He…I don’t know mom. He’s Snape. I don’t know how we’re supposed to be getting on. The last seven years he has been a constant pain in my…”

“Watch it. I’m still your mother even if you are going to save the world”

“I’m just saying that he hates me and I always thought that I was supposed to… I don’t know? Hate him back?”

“He never hated you Harry he did and probably will still, fight against light emotions. He’s not you Harry. He doesn’t know what it’s like to love and be loved.”

“But you…”

“I was his friend, just for a short time. This war has been nothing if not cruel to Sev.”

“Sev?”

Harry’s heart leapt at what he heard next, his mother laughing. “Don’t try that one for awhile. You must have patience for the time being. He will indeed be a trying force. And you, my son, are full of courage and selflessness but don’t doubt that you can be difficult in your own right. He also has his work cut out for him. The amount of time you spent in the congregate has a calming affect. I can’t wait for him to see you when that wears off.” She gave another hardy chuckle.

“What am I supposed to do mom?” Lily was overjoyed with the prospect of advising her son.

“Let your soul feel.”

“Feel what?”

“Anything. Hatred, anger, humor…and someday when your both ready, love.”

“What? You mean? No mom I’m sorry. I am not going to love Snape.”

“Be open to it Harry. Your souls have bonded. There is no question. You and Sev will fall in love.”

“Over my dead bloody body.” A growl infused with contempt issued itself from the dark man entwined with Lily Potter’s son. She nudged him with her toe. “Nice to see you joining my company” Snape quickly withdrew himself to the sofa.

“And if it’s a matter of you dead body, what do you think all of this was about?”

“Blasted woman! It’s a figure of…” His eyes dropped to Harry who was in hysterics on the ground. “Potter that is hardly appropriate behavior.”

“I’m sorry it’s just…I’ve never seen…” Tears were spilling from his eyes as he clutched his abdomen. “No one EVER gets the best of you!”

“Yes well death doesn’t seem to view me kindly.”

Lily patted both boys on the head. “Well I’ll be off. You two have…things to speak of that a mother need’nt hear.”

“Mom wait!” She turned around quickly. “Will I see you again?”

“Harry we have thirty glorious days ahead of us! Of course! Besides you’ll both be calling around five for dinner tomorrow.” With that her long robes swept out of the house.

“You did this.” Snape mumbled while taking off his coat. “You should have left me dead.”

A scarlet shade of anger entered Harry’s cheeks. “And you should have known better then to repeat the prophecy that got my parents killed, ignorant git.”

“And this was to be my penance!”

“Always the martyr huh professor? Do you think I wanted this? It was bad enough that I’ve seen you everywhere for the past year now you actually will be everywhere I turn for the rest of blasted eternity!”

“What are you saying?” Snape looked up in surprise.

“You were the only one, the only person who taught me things that I could use. I never would have fully understood Voldemort if it hadn’t been for you. No one knew how to fight him except you. I thought you’d be by my side and then…” He let a defeated snicker escape his lips. “You were evil…then not…then evil again and lastly you were…dead. But that wasn’t enough! You had to let me know just one last time that you were in fact, not evil. Gods Snape beings from a higher plane had to argue over your true nature! That doesn’t strike you as obscure? And damn it I had to save your arse! And I always thought it would be you saving my…”

“Arse?” Snape asked with a hidden grin

“In a manner of speaking.”

“Did you care? That is to say did it matter to you if my predilections leaned toward evil or otherwise?”

Harry looked exasperated. “Of course.” His small voice was bitter.

“And why is that Mr. Potter?”

“Because…what did you see when you looked at me all these years?”

“The truth?”

“If you would.”

“The most self-appreciating, cross-bearing, holier-then-thou, dimwitted student ever to stumble into a spotlight that only served to inflate ideas of ill-placed grandeur. Though, you also happen to have a heart of pure unadulterated gold which provides you the ability to possess an unsurpassed sense of loyalty and a detestable amount of bravery. Let alone the fact that you exuberate innocence…It’s irritating.” He added quickly, realizing he had slightly lost his edge.”

“That’s just it. I was never a savior or the-boy-who-lived. You made your own opinions. That was a comfort to me. You never believed that I could do all the things it was told that I could do.”

“You did all of those things in spite of that.”

“Did you think I could?”

“Not for a second.” Both men shared a heart-felt smile. Harry let out a long sigh.

“Any chance you bit it with pack of cigs on you?”

“Maybe not so innocent ay Potter?”

“Hey you try to bring down uber-evil year after year and not pick up some habits.”

Without making an expression Snape drew a pack out of his shirt pocket and handed Harry what he was asking for. Harry took in a long-needed drag.

“Did you think about telling them no?” Severus asked without a segue.

“No. We need you down there.”

“Have you really got a handle on the permanence of our predicament? We are, essentially, married.”

“Can we marry other people back home?”

“No.” Snape answered without further explanation.

“What else do you know about Iugum Animus?”

“Not much. We can’t possibly die until our job is done. Our souls have welded together. We must call the same place home; we cannot pursue a romantic relationship outside of us. We can share power. You’ve signed your life over to me and vice-versa.”

“Alright.” Harry stated calmly.

Snape couldn’t hide his surprise. “Alright? You have to look at my face everyday forever and your response is ‘alright’?”

“We’ll deal with it and while it’s true that you wouldn’t be my first choice for a life-mate…your face isn’t so bad to look at.”

“No girls Potter…ever.”

“Overrated Snape. How will you feel? Without women, I mean?”

“If you must know I tend not to lean that way.”

“Intriguing, to say the least.”

“I fear I must retire. Dying really just takes the life right out of you.” Snape spoke while standing. Harry giggled.

There were only two doors off of the main room of the cottage. They found that one entered the restroom and the other to a single bedroom. There was a note penned by Sirius. With four simple words: ‘Get used to it.’

Snape glared at Harry, then to the bed. “I wish I were still dead.” Both men curled up on opposite edges of the bed. “Harry?” The older man whispered into the darkness.

“Yes?”

“Thank You.” It was simple. It was enough.

“Severus?”

“Hmm?”

“Don’t hog the blankets.”