The White Room

Tape Four


“Potter’s been in to see me, Granger.”
“I know, Malfoy. He probably explained our situation to you and then punched you for good measure, judging by that bruise on your face. I can only hope it hurt.”
“Almost right, Granger, though it was Weasley who punched me. Man’s a bloody oaf and probably just too stupid to hex me.”
“Or too angry to bother. You’ve been here for nearly a month, Malfoy, and we have nothing. There are people outside this room almost begging to be the ones to kill you and all you can do is sit here and sneer at me, like we’re still at Hogwarts and being better than us is still more important to you than the future of this world.”
“Lovely speech, Granger. I am I supposed to be stirred by the realisation of my own selfishness?”
“You’re impossible.”
“So are you.”

…

“Were you ostracised from the Death Eater ranks for being unable to kill Dumbledore?”
“In a manner of speaking.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“I was still a Death Eater, still made to make my report to the Dark Lord.”
“What did Voldemort do to you?”
“You almost sounded like you cared then, Granger. I don’t want your little heart oozing all over me, thanks.”
“He tortured you, didn’t he? And left you for dead.”
“He … was disappointed in me. I hadn’t wanted to fail, for the Dark Lord or my pride. Any son of my father should not fail.”
“Was joining the Death Eaters something you did to please your father?”
“Please my father, please myself. It was a win-win situation, or so I thought. It also helped that I do and still believe that Muggleborns and Squibs are filth, and don’t deserve the magic they have running in their veins.”
“Magic is magic is magic, Malfoy. Don’t you believe in everyone being the same?”
“Egalitarianism never worked for nobility, Granger.”
“Nobility?”
“The Malfoys go back hundreds, maybe even a thousand years. We are one of the oldest pureblood families in Britain.”
“That doesn’t mean anything, Malfoy. You still have the same powers that I do, and will die the way I will die, both of us bleeding the same coloured blood. You can’t honestly believe that blood is important. Voldemort himself is only a half-blood.”
“Blood is everything, Granger. Without Wizarding blood we would be useless, ignorant Muggles. And people like you are just filthy aberrations.”
“Then why is it I am always one intellectual step ahead of you, Malfoy? Why is it that I can perform magic you haven’t even heard of?”
“Because … you are an aberration in every way possible, Granger.” … “I have hated you from the moment I saw your bushy head. I have hated you so much it could burn my skin. I wanted to destroy you on the night of the Yule Ball, when you looked nicer than you should have in your blue fucking dress. I’ve hated you for being smarter than me, for always besting me in every class and earning me the shame of my father. I’ve hated you for being an aberration of your kind. And I’ve hated myself more for letting my loathing of you to become a weakness.”
“Emotions aren’t a weakness, Malfoy. Love is what saved Harry from death when he was baby.”
“I hate you, Granger. Hate, hate fucking HATE YOU! And you’re telling me that that’s a strength?”
“If that’s what turned you away from Voldemort, then yes, that’s a strength.”
“How can you sit there and be so calm about this?”
“I know you hate me, Malfoy. And I know that I hate you too. But I also know that there are things much bigger than the emotions we feel for each other.”
“Just yell at me, Granger. Throw some witty, sharp reply back in my face. Storm around. Hit me! Just don’t sit there and drink this up with your fucking doe eyes!”
“You speak of hate as if it’s the only thing that drives you! What about something positive for a change? What if you screaming about hate: how you hate your father, how you hate this world and how you hate me, is really just a disguise for something much bigger and darker and scarier to you?”
“Granger, what the fuck are you talking about?”
“Granger!”
“I’m leaving now, Malfoy.”
“Don’t leave me here, Granger! I’ve been staring at white walls for so long even you’re welcome company.”
“No.”
”I hate you, Granger.”
“And I hate you, too.”
“Okay.”

Tape Five

“I didn’t think you’d be back.”
“I’m here for information, Malfoy.”
“As always.”
“Don’t roll your eyes at me. You’re in no position to be like this, Malfoy.”
“What’s happened?”
“Some members of the Order were attacked while they were guarding Hogwarts last night. We have always thought there was something inside the castle Voldemort might want and we want to know if you have any idea what it is.”
“The Dark Lord is not in the habit of sharing his secrets with anyone but his pet snake.”
“Not good enough, Malfoy.”
“Ow! Merlin, Granger, did you have to stab me with your wand?!”
“Yes, I did. You’re being particularly unhelpful today.”
“I know what this is about.”
“Oh?”
“It’s about the pathetic confession I gave you last week. Is that why you haven’t been back here for so long?”
“I don’t want to talk about the dysfunctional relationship we have, Malfoy, I want to talk about real things!”
“This is real.”
“I should just kill you now.”
“You don’t want to. I’m your puzzle, Granger. I am the thing stopping you going insane without your schoolbooks and lesson plans and homework. Everything outside is too real for you.”
“And you.”
“I admit it. Do you?”
“No. I’m doing this because I was asked to. We all have to do … distasteful things from time to time.”
“’Distasteful’?”
“It is to me. You smell terrible.”
“I wouldn’t if I was allowed a shower.”
”Scourgify!”
”Bloody hell, Granger! That fucking hurt!”
“So sorry, Malfoy, but needs must. You’re a prisoner. And you won’t have any privileges until you give me something I can use. Something useful! Something to make this hell worth it!”
“I’m so hurt, Granger.”
“Arsehole.”
“I’m surprised you’d descend to using such foul language.”
“Fuck you, Malfoy.”

…

“Get away from me, Malfoy!”
“And here I was thinking those words were an invitation.”
“You’re a fucking maniac. Get away from me or I’ll hex you! One step closer and I’ll - ”

…

“You don’t taste muddy.”
“Don’t sound so surprised, Malfoy! I am human!”
“Aren’t you going to slap me for kissing you?”
“That was a kiss? It was more like a violent mashing of your mouth on mine. And it was disgusting.”
“Can I try again?”
“Are you out of your mind??!”
“Oh I am, Granger. White walls can drive you to do the most distasteful things.”
…

“……..okay…”
“Okay what?
“Do it.”
“Do what?”
“K…kiss me.”
“You’re such a romantic, Granger.”
“Please.”
“Okay.”

…

“Your hair is so soft. I thought it’d be a thorny bush.”
“You’re not always right, Malfoy.”
“Are you with Weasel? Is he the one who taught you to kiss like that?”
“That’s personal.”
“We’ve just been snogging and you’re telling me that question’s too personal to answer?”
“We’re not engaged, Malfoy.”
“You’re cold.”
“And so are you, in much more frightening ways.”
“Bye, Granger.”

Tape Six


“Sit over there, Malfoy, and don’t move or I’ll restrain you.”
“Afraid, Granger?”
“I’m not going to play your games any longer, Malfoy. I am not frightened of you.”
“Then why are we on opposite sides of the room?”
“One of our Order members died in the attack I told you about the other day. We need to know where your loyalties lie.”
“What do you do when you’re not in here with me? Do you plan attacks on the Death Eaters with everyone else? Do you cook for everyone? Do you go out in these battles you tell me about? Have you killed anyone yet? What do you see? How do you feel about it all? … Do you fuck Weasley when everyone’s asleep, holding onto him so tightly it feels like, that for once, you’re escaping? Or is that what you come to me for?”
“You’re disgusting.”
“And you’re avoiding my questions.”
“They’re not questions worth answering.”
“Neither are yours. I’m here aren’t I? I’m not wearing my mask and I haven’t got my wand.”
“Were you sent to do what you’re doing?”

…

“Answer me!”
“If I had, do you think I’d have let you take my wand? I was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“You surrendered.”
“You always so stubbornly insist that, as if my surrendering was a noble choice. I surrendered because I knew I was outnumbered, and could have possibly died trying to escape you. And so I chose the course of action that would preserve my life, at least for a little while.”
“You coward. You dirty Slytherin coward.”
“Self-preservation is my cause, Granger. Always has and always will be.”
“How can you sit there, so smug, as if that chair is a throne and you’re the king of the whole fucking world?! How can you, knowing that you’re nothing?! You believe in nothing! You feel nothing except hate and the need to survive! You’re barely human!”
“You’re disgusted in me.”
“You’ve just given me reason to justify the disgust I have always felt for you. And the disgust in myself that I could have found something worth keeping in you. I’m ashamed of the thought that you could even have a soul.”
“Granger - ”
“In answer to all your pathetic questions: yes I plan attacks with the Order, and yes, I have killed people. I have seen Death Eaters torture muggles and vomited at the sight, I’ve slipped in blood and mud and cried by myself in the bath because I’ll never be clean again. But at least I believe, at least I have love inside me. That’s more than you’ll ever have, even if you’ve seen what I have seen.”
“Granger - ”
“If you make one attempt to touch me at all, I will not hesitate.”
“Your hand is shaking. I doubt you’d be able to hit me, even if I was right in front of you.”
“Malfoy …”
“I think about you, while I’m lying in my cell. Sometimes I even think I can smell you walk past the door; your perfume slips in under the door and it’s the sweetest, most beautiful thing I’ve ever smelled. And I hate that I wish you were there with me.”
“What are you trying to do?”
“D’you hate me as much as I hate you?”
“I don’t know.”

…

“Why does your mouth taste sweet?”
“I ate a sugar quill on the way.”
“It tastes good. Better than the shit I’m fed.”
…“Are you finished yet?”
“Why do you let me touch you and then never touch back?”
“Because you disgust me.”
“Touch me.”

…

“Where?”
“Anywhere. Anywhere.”

…

“Oh Merlin, Granger.”
“Am I doing it right?”
“Ye … yessss.”
“It feels strange …”
“It feels f … f …fucking fantastic. I’m gonna …”

…

“Oh gross.”
“What?”
”Scourgify.”
“Granger, that was the best wank I’ve had in a long time.”
“You’re disgusting. Put it away and pull up your pants.”
“I could …”
“You’re not touching me any more than you have already, Malfoy.”
“Sure, Granger. I forgot you were in charge.”
“You’re a sarcastic twat.”
“And you have a hickey on your neck. Wouldn’t want to walk out with that badge on, would you?”
“Fuck. You.”
“I suppose you won’t be sharing these tapes at meetings anymore, Granger.”

…

“I never did.”







AN: I hope you liked this chapter. It was a lot harder to write than the first one. Please review! And a big thanks to those who've already revieved! I really appreciate it! :D