The Enrichment Project

Hermione Granger didn't really believe in out-of-body experiences, although she was sure that she was having one at that moment. She felt as though she were moving in slow motion, and the classroom soundtrack had dulled down to an indistinct murmur in the background of her consciousness. She vaguely registered Ron and Harry sputtering their outrage at her predicament.

Professor Poppenz reached into her basket and pulled out a "baby." The doll was swaddled in blue and had a mop of brown curls. "I would like to congratulate you on your new arrival," she began as she thrust the doll toward Professor Snape. "It's a boy!" she announced. Snape involuntarily reached for the life-like, squirming and fussing educational tool and held it away from his body by its underarms.

Professor Snape stood still, frowning at the baby for a moment, then he turned his sharp gaze toward Professor Poppenz. "I am dismissing the class NOW, Madame, so that we may discuss your present lack of sanity in private," he addressed the guest professor in a low, dangerous tone. "Class DISMISSED," he barked at the students while still holding the baby as far from his body as possible.

Professor Poppenz did not appear to have her spirits dampened in the least. She happily presented the other bundles of joy to their new "parents" as they filed past the desk. Draco sauntered to the front of the room followed closely by Pansy. "Well, let's see him then," he held out his arms for his baby. Poppenz obliged and offered her congratulations as she handed him a rosy toned baby with silvery hair bundled up in a soft pink blanket. "A GIRL? But I want a boy," Draco tried to hand the baby back to the Professor, but she just clasped her hands behind her back and smiled at the Slytherin prince.

"Sorry, Mr. Malfoy. No returns."

"Oh great," Draco quickly dumped off the baby on a frazzled-looking Pansy and turned back to Professor Poppenz, "Can't we have another one then? You know like twins...a boy twin. I need to have my family name carried on, you see. It's important."

Poppenz continued to smile. "I'm sure you'll grow to love a daughter as much as you would a son, Dear. Next couple, please!" Poppenz again busied herself with her basket.

Draco shot Pansy a "you-know-this-is-somehow-your-fault" glare and headed for the door. Pansy trotted after him, looking upset while trying her best to juggle the baby and all her books.

"Hermione...Hermione...Herm...," Ron was nudging his fellow Gryffindor, "Hey, are you okay?"

Hermione shook her head as if to clear a fog and sat up straight. "I'll be fine," she pressed her lips together in her best McGonagall fashion and carefully folded her hands in front of her, "This is just a ridiculous waste of time."

"Come on, you two," Poppenz called to Ron and Harry. She was holding up a baby boy with ginger fuzz on the top of his rather large head.

"No denying that one, Ron. Spittin' image, that is...," Seamus called over his shoulder from the doorway, "Looks like Harry's been true to you," he added before running off down the corridor.

"Shut it!" Ron yelled, fists clenched and cheeks burning. He stacked up his books and parchments and slammed out of his seat, snapping his quill in the process. He proceeded to the doorway and slouched against the frame, leaving Harry to collect their baby.

Harry gave Hermione a sympathetic look before going up to receive his "son" and wait for Hermione in the corridor with Ron.

As soon as the two professors were left alone in the classroom with Hermione (and an increasingly fussy baby) Professor Snape immediately turned on Professor Poppenz. "Forgive me...what was the name of that *fine* institution of *learning* from which you were sent? St. Mungo's?" Snape began his sarcastic tirade, "Are there wizards in white robes out there looking for you?"

"You cannot possibly think that I have the time, nor interest, to be involved in your frivolous project." The baby began to kick its feet and cry. Hermione was transfixed as Snape shifted the baby into a more comfortable position, actually cradling the baby in the crook of his arm. The Potions Master was apparently unaware of his own actions. "If it wasn't on the direct orders of our Headmaster, I would never have allowed this to happen on MY time, in MY classroom."

The baby had stopped crying and seemed content for the moment reclined in Snape's arm. *Is he actually ROCKING the baby?*, Hermione wondered in awe. Indeed, Snape appeared to be shifting his weight slightly from side to side as he dressed down Professor Poppenz. It was as unlikely a sight as coming across two polar bears...wearing plaid suits...playing checkers...and drinking butterbeer...in the middle of the quidditch pitch...

"And furthermore, it was exceptionally poor form to show such gross disrespect for my classroom rules, *Professor* Poppenz. NEVER have I tolerated such chaos in this room...and I will NOT allow it again, is that clear?"

Professor Poppenz smiled serenely at Professor Snape. "I do apologize for stepping on your toes, sir. I realize that sometimes it is hard to share your turf with another, but I think you did very well today," she cooed.

"How dare you speak to me that way!" Snape was livid. "I am not one of your students. I will not be patronized. My involvement in this project is over. I am certain that Miss Granger...," he missed a beat, reluctant to finish his sentence in Hermione's presence, "is...capable...of adequately completing your assignment on her own."

*A complement from Snape?* Hermione was sure that the Earth must have decided to spin in a new direction that day.

Snape's eyes darted to Hermione and noted that his student was staring at him with a look of wonder on her face. He looked down at the baby in his arms for the first time, stopped rocking the child, and crossed over to Hermione in a few strides. He abruptly deposited the baby in her arms.

"Everyone OUT!" he commanded.

The baby began to fuss again. Hermione had never held a baby before. An only child, she had no younger siblings at home on which to practice. She never even played with a doll--she had been an early reader and preferred her books over any toys.


Professor Poppenz clucked her tongue. "Professor Snape, I would hate to see Miss Granger's grade suffer because her partner refused to participate. It's not fair to her."

Hermione nearly gasped. "My GRADE will suffer? Professor Poppenz...please...," Hermione opened and closed her mouth a few times, her pleas catching in her throat. She was seeing stars and feeling faint. Her grades were of utmost importance to her and the thought of having her perfect record compromised because of this...this...Hermione felt exactly the same way as Snape. "You can't be serious! This is crazy!" She stood up with the baby, trying to soothe it as Snape had done. She wasn't as successful, however. The baby managed to get a good grip on a lock of Hermione's hair, tugging on her hair with surprising strength. Tears stung Hermione's eyes as she tried in vain to get the little guy to open his fist.

Poppenz plucked her basket from Snape's desk and marched over to Hermione. She patted the girl's shoulder. "Just do your best, Dear. You'll still receive partial credit for your share of the work," Poppenz tried to reassure Hermione before sweeping past her and exiting the classroom.

"PARTIAL credit!" Hermione called after the Professor, but she was gone, the sound of her heels clicking in the corridor fading away.

Hermione HAD liked the witch at first...now, not so much.

Hermione and Professor Snape were left to stare at each other with the same expression of utter disgust smeared across their faces. Showing unabashed disgust for each other had happened many times before, but THIS time, the expressions of disgust were not for each other. Hermione and Snape were united at that moment in loathing for Professor Poppenz.

Professor Snape spoke first ending the freak moment of unity, "You are dismissed, Miss Granger." He turned from her and waved his hand at the blackboard, erasing it instantly.

To be continued......


A/N: Thank you all soooo much for reading and reviewing my story! (Emmylovedraco, you made me laugh out loud!) I'm sorry I wasn't able to update sooner. I'll try to be more prompt from here on out. Thanks again!
G. Snapp ;)