The Awakening

Ginny couldn’t help but to smooth the wrinkles that seem to have become permanent on his forehead. Even in sleep they were there, which made her wonder how well he had been resting and what else was going on with him, beyond Ron. How many other friends and loved ones did he watch die all because of this damn bloody war. Ginny had seen battle herself and only lost one best friend in that time. She had always said that she would join the fight when she came of age but she also ordered everyone to keep that information from Harry for he didn’t need to be distracted in what he was having to do.

Part of her wondered if she didn’t have her family to return to after the fighting was done, would she have continued to blame herself for the death of her friend like Harry was now. She remembered that time clearly for she was so low in blame for she survived and yet her friend did not. Ginny looked up at the heavens, “Please you two help me help him. I think that he needs us now more than ever.” As if someone was answering her, a shooting star shrieked across the sky. “Thank you.” She said as she looked back upon the sleeping face of her one and only true love. She bent over and placed a gentle kiss on his lips, “Rest now love.”

Somewhere in the distance, a creature of the night called out for its mate, as the salty smelling breeze flowed around her. Memories of her brother filled her mind as she sat there, morning once again the loss of her brother. So many times, she wanted to hurt him as they grew up but more often then not, he protected her from the outside world. Ron was a man, who never really understood how strong he was, and he died in a way that no one should have had to, but he was a hero. Why hadn’t anyone told them, the whole family, what really happened? All they had ever been told was that he died in battle one night, and that he died fighting Voldemort. Never once had they been told that he died protecting his family. She knew in her heart that Ron would never have cursed Harry if he had known the truth.

Now she had to prove it Harry, so that he could begin to heal. He couldn’t go on blaming himself, for it had been almost six months now since that night. It was time for healing, but how was the big question. She wished that Hermione was around to help her with this, but Hermione was killed in the battle outside of Stonehenge about three months ago. If there was one blessing about her death, was that Harry was not there to witness it. She knew that healing after witnessing the death of a friend like that was one of the hardest things to do but she did it only because of her family. For several weeks, she blamed herself for Hermione’s death, after all if she had been able to see behind that tree or noticed the movement she could have killed the death eater before he killed Hermione. Her best friend died in her arms that night, and that ripped at her soul.

At the funeral for Hermione, Ginny kept wishing that she were the one that died that night. After all what did she have to live for? She lost her brother and the only person that she loved, so there was no reason for her to be alive. Slowly over the next few weeks, she came to realize that she was alive for a reason and that she wasn’t to blame. It was hard, yes; there was no way to deny that but she was getting through it because of love. Harry needed that love and she knew that her family would never turn their back on him no matter what. Then it hit her, the one person who would be able to help him out more than even she could. She would just have to call the person in the morning when she got back to the Burrow for only they could help. They would be able to make Harry understand that he didn’t kill Ron.

Harry started thrashing around in his sleep, mumbling and cursing someone. She tried to sooth the bad dream away for he looked angry and frightened by placing her hand onto his chest, which he held onto as if it was a lifeline. “Ginny!!” he suddenly screamed. It was then that she wondered how much she had been used against him? Was she the reason that he was in so much pain? If she was the reason, would she be able to help him or would it need to be someone else. If it were to be someone else hopefully, it is going to be the person she had thought of. The only thing she knew for certain was that it was love that has protected him for so long, it was love that kept him going, and it was love that was going to see him through this all.

The night sky slowly gave way to the early morning light, with the morning songbirds beginning to sing their songs. Ginny still sat there in the grass with Harry’s head in her lap. The night had been a hard one for he slept restlessly most of the night as if he was fighting some kind of demon. She knew that in all reality, he was but it wasn’t the one inside of him. It had been two months since Voldemort’s death, two months of him being who knew where, doing who knew what. The family had tried to locate him several different ways but they always ended in failure. Harry didn’t want to be found before this, but this time was different whether he knew it or not for he allowed her to follow as if he knew she would because he needed her tonight. Almost as if he was asking for the help to heal.

Slowly as the sun started to creep above the horizon, Harry started to stir. Ginny knew that he wasn’t having a bad dream this time for his face looked the most relaxed it has all night. No, Harry was beginning to wake up from the restless night that he had. She was watching him, when he opened his eyes, he seemed a little surprised and smiled up at her. “Have you been here all night?” he asked as he pushed a loose strain of hair out of her eyes.

She couldn’t help by to smile back at him, “Well I did say that I wouldn’t go home without you. So you stayed here, that meant that I was staying here.”

Harry sat up, running his hand through his hair. Ginny had to admit that the twenty-year old Harry was a great deal more striking than the nearly seventeen year old that she had gone out with so long ago. It was more than the war that lasted for the last five years from the time Voldemort came back into human form. He had matured so much in so many ways and she regretted not being around more for him. It was when he looked at her this time, she knew that he was going to try to say good-bye again and really mean it. She wasn’t going to let him walk away again for she wouldn’t be able to survive him leaving this time around.

Ginny turned a little so that she was a little closer to him and so that he couldn’t turn his head from her when she said, “You are not going to run again. You keep saying that you don’t want to hurt me anymore, but if you walk away again, I don’t think that I could survive it. You are not the only one who lost someone, and I couldn’t survive loosing you again. Too many times I have let you walk away because it was necessary but now it’s different.”

Harry’s eyes were so expressive this time full of love and longing as well as confusion. She hated putting him on the spot like she just did, but she was fighting for him, herself and for them. “Gin, you don’t know what you are saying.”

“Don’t I? I thought I answered that last night. Here let me explain it again.” She said as she reached for his face, that was rough with stubble, “I am pretty sure that I am asking you to stay. That I am telling you that I love you and want you to stay put.” She moved to being just inches from him, “I am pretty sure that I’m saying that there is no place on this Earth that you can go and hide, that I won’t find you.”

Harry closed his eyes as he sighed, “Gin, you can’t really mean that after all that I have done to you and your family.”

Without realizing what she was doing, she leaned forward and kissed him. She heard him moan as his had grabbed the back of her head, deepening the kiss. She had only been able to dream of his kisses over the last three years. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he pulled her into his lap. The kisses were better than she remembered and had a sensation of desperation on both of their accounts.

After several long moments of exploring each others mouths in sheer pleasure and being in each other’s arms Harry pulled back, “Oh Gin.” He said as his heart raced far too fast for him to catch his breath, “I can’t.”

She smiled at him as if she had some secret, “You were doing pretty damn good there if you ask me.”

“Gin, please this isn’t a game.” He said as he ran his hand through her hair. He didn’t want to let go of her but he knew that eventually the fact that he had killed her brother in order to save her would kill whatever she felt for him.

“I wasn’t playing a game with you.” She said as she ran a hand over his chest.

His will power was weakening with every second that she kept her hand on his chest and each sensation that he was feeling as her hand moved smoothly over his shirt. At this moment, all he could think of was how much he wanted this woman, “Gin, we shouldn’t.”

“Will you come home with me then?” She asked as she played with the top button of his shirt. “And before you say no,” she popped the button loose. His breath started to quicken with the touch of her finger touching his bare, “I am completely prepared to do whatever it takes to fight as hard and as dirty as it is going to take to keep you from running again. I wont, I repeat WON’T lose you again.”

Suddenly an image of her naked, sweaty body underneath him seemed to drive away every last thought from his mind. He wanted her so bad at this moment that he couldn’t think about what they were just talking about. Quickly before he acted on what he really wanted he pulled her hand from him, holding it in his hand so that she wouldn’t drive him crazy with need. “Gin.” He croaked out as a way to get her to stop and because he couldn’t really speak.

Her smile told him that she knew exactly what she was doing to him, “Come home.”

Those two words had the effect of a bucket of cold water being thrown on him. He gently pushed her off his lap and stood up, “I can’t Gin. I want to but I just can’t.”

Ginny stood up and walked up to him. She wrapped her arms around his waist, placing her head on his chest, “Give me one good reason why.”

He knew that as he wrapped his arms around her, he was selfish to hold her like this as he said, “Gin,” he said with a sigh, “Didn’t you hear what I said to you last night?”

“I heard that that you had to make one hell of a choice that no one should ever have to make. I heard that you choose to save a house full of people, which sadly ended the life of one person. Voldemort killed Ron, not you. Voldemort kill Ron who would have gladly given his life to save his family if he had known what was going on.” She spoke in a soft gentle tone, which seem to sooth some more of the raw edges of Harry’s soul. “Now let me ask this of you. Do you know who exactly was at the Burrow the night Voldemort killed Ron?”

Harry rubbed her back, as he shook his head no, “I only knew that you were in the house. I picked you over Ron. How can you say that I didn’t kill Ron when it was because I choose you over him.”

“Did you use your magic against Ron? Did you cause him the pain that drove him to the point of cursing you?” He couldn’t answer that for no, he didn’t use his magic against Ron, but because his love for Ginny was so strong, that he chose not to do anything to stop the pain. If he had been stronger he would have picked Ron over Ginny, but he was weak. “I didn’t think so. What you did do, however, was save Mum, Dad, Bill, Fleur, Charlie, Marilyn, who is Charlie’s wife, Fred, George, Hermione, myself and little Ronald.”

Harry pulled Ginny away from him when she said little Ronald. He didn’t know of anyone else in the family unless it was Bill and Fleur child that they had been expecting. She smiled at him, “And Ron had been at the house just that morning to see his Godson.”

He walked away from her, “He had a Godson? Someone who would have needed him in their life?”

Ginny nodded, “Do you really believe in your heart of hearts, that Ronald Bilius Weasley wouldn’t have happily given his life to save Ronald James Weasley?” She walked back up to him and placed a hand on his chest.

Harry couldn’t think for it felt like he had been kicked in the chest, knocking out his breath. His knees became weak and nearly buckled, and would have if Ginny hadn’t been there supporting him, “Everyone was there?” He was having a hard time wrapping his mind that there was more than just Ginny in the house that night. The night that he had to choose between a friend, that was more like a brother, and the love of his life.

Ginny held onto him supporting him as he tried digesting everything, “Yes, we were there that night waiting for you, and Ron to arrive to celebrate the announcement of Ron and Hermione up coming wedding.”

“She must have hated me.” He said as the tears started to fall slowly. He regretted never being able to tell her the truth.

“She never hated you. She was hurt that you didn’t come to her, she needed you like you needed her.” Ginny answered truthfully. “She told me the night she died that she loved you and had missed you.”

“If she had known the truth…” he started to say and then stopped as the words that she just said sank in. “What do you mean she told you the night she died?”

Ginny smiled and shrugged at the same time, “Harry I told you that I would join the Order when I came of age, and I did. I was there that night fighting about a dozen death eaters just outside of Stonehenge. There were about ten of us fighting them. But one of the death eaters was behind a tree and I never saw him until it was too late.” Tears filled her eyes for it was so hard to relive that night but it helped to talk about it, “She died in my arms. She was at peace for she knew that she was going to be with Ron. She loved you too Harry. She wanted you to know that.”

“Gin I didn’t want you to join because of that reason. You shouldn’t have been exposed to that kind of fighting. Good God woman what if you had been killed?” he said as he held onto tightly, realizing for the first time that she was in such grave danger when he had tried so hard to protect her. “If anything would have happened to you, I would have just given up.”

“That’s the reason why I told everyone higher up in the Order as well as Ron and Hermione not to tell you.” She said.

“Ron knew?” he asked in complete shock.

“Yes. Now will you please come home with me?” She asked one more time. “Everyone has been waiting for two months for you to come home.”

Harry looked at her, “But last night when I asked you what you wanted you didn’t answer.”

“I was confused Harry. Please understand that for nearly three years I haven’t seen much of you, I wanted you to stay but I needed to protect myself from the feelings that I have for you.” Ginny took a deep breath, “Plus I needed to know what happened to Ron, but I wasn’t sure if I was ready to hear it.”

“But now?”

“Now, like I already said, I will hunt you down if you ever take off again. Harry it is time to come home and heal. I am healing and now it is time for you to start healing.”

Harry shook his head this time is uncertainty more than anything else, for he really wanted to go home to the Burrow for it was the only real home that he had ever known. However, his fear that the others would blame him for the death of Ron was still so strong, that he was scared to return.

Ginny saw the hesitant look on Harry’s face and knew that there was one way to get him to agree to finally come home. She hated to do it but it was the only way. She stepped away from him as she placed her hands on her hips, “Harry James Potter!” she said firmly in a low voice so that he knew that she meant every word that she was about to say. “It is about time that you stop thinking about yourself and start thinking about those who have loved you for nearly ten years. To think about those who have worried about you day and night since the day you started your hunt for the horcruxes. To think about those who have been waiting for you to come home finally for over two months now.”

Harry could see that Ginny was getting angry and that almost made him smile. He missed seeing her fiery temper, but he still had doubts and fears about returning to the Burrow. He couldn’t face all of the Weasley’s, not with what he had done. “I don’t know Gin. I mean I am scared.”

“I promise you that you won’t be alone. I will be there with you.” She said encouraging him to face his fears.

Harry started to pace a little trying to think of what he wanted to do. Fear still gripped him, but the longing that he felt last night to see everyone when he went to the Burrow last night was still just as strong if not stronger. He needed to know that they all survived the war, but was afraid that they would send him away. He stopped and looked at Ginny, “Gin, I am scared to death that they will hate me and send me away when they learn the truth about what happened to Ron. I just scared of loosing the last little bits of love that I know is there because I was selfish.”

Ginny walked up to him, placing a hand on his heart, “If they send you away then they will be sending me away. Wherever you go from now on, is where I go.” She rested her head on his chest again, “Besides they love you, nothing you could ever do would make them send you away.” She said softly praying that he was listening and that he would agree to go home. He needed to speak to the one person that could get through to him, and that was only going to happen if he went back to the Burrow.

Harry took a deep breath as he looked up at the now light morning sky. It was so fresh and clean looking with no clouds in sight. Somewhere inside of him, a spark of hope came to life, almost as if someone or something was telling him that take this day and make it a new start to his life. He was scared and uncertain but maybe today was the day to start new. “Ok Gin.” She looked up at him with hope in her eyes. He couldn’t help but cradle her face in his hands, “I mean I am not all that certain about it but if you really think that it will be okay then I will go home with you.”

The smile on her face made everything that he was about to face really worth it. “Thank you.” She said as she kissed him, deeply and passionately.

Harry broke off the kiss for if he didn’t then they wouldn’t be going anywhere today for he wasn’t sure how much longer he could stop himself from taking her. For so long he had dreamed of her, kissing her, making slow and passionate love to her, and making her his wife. “If we are going to go then we better go now, before they worry about where you have gone to when you don’t show up for a few days.”

Her smile told him that she wouldn’t have minded what he had on his mind. That little spark of hope became a small little flame now. Maybe everything would be okay. “Promise no running.”

“No running.” He said.