Up the Duff
folder
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
31
Views:
26,372
Reviews:
172
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
31
Views:
26,372
Reviews:
172
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters from the books or movies. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Wizard Glide
:::::::::::
Harry Potter-Malfoy, boy who lived, Savior of the wizarding world, and all around wicked cool, superhero, vampire, sex god stood stunned in the middle of a small clearing in the forbidden forest as what looked like a giant, highly pissed off blob of lime green jell-o attacked and ATE his brand new, also super cool, vampire, blond, sex kitten of a husband, Draco Malfoy-Potter.
By Merlin’s crusty arse crack, this would never do!
Harry raised his wand and pointed it determinedly at the blob. This big booger had no idea of who it was messing with! He was Harry Bloody Potter! - Malfoy.
“Accio Draco and cat!” Harry bellowed, putting all his magical might behind the spell.
Draco Malfoy-Potter and Mrs. Norris were summarily ripped from the bowels of the fiendish glob of goo by Harry’s spell. With a wet squelching sound both his beloved husband and a yowling cat came flying at Harry full speed.
The three of them collided and fell to the ground in a sticky pile as the blob roared its fury and began to slither across the ground to where they lay in a tangled up mess. Harry managed to roll Draco off of him long enough to point his wand in the monsters direction again.
“Encarsarus!” Harry yelled. Immediately the beast was surrounded by an invisible but inescapable energy bubble.
Now that the danger was past, Harry and Draco set about untangling themselves and Mrs. Norris. Finally they were all free, though unquestionably icky.
Draco face twisted horribly and he spat. “Yuck! That’s awful!”
Mrs. Norris seemed to be of the same opinion. She was rolling around and spitting like she had swallowed the worlds biggest hair ball.
Harry couldn’t help the small smile that crept across his face at the sight of his immaculate, always so perfect husband looking like he’d been jell-o wrestling and lost. Draco’s hair was sticking up in all sorts of directions and his skin had a slight green tinge to it where he had been in contact with the creature.
A plump pink bottom lip slowly poked out and began to tremble. “I’ve been slimed Harry!” Draco wailed.
There was no arguing with that. Draco had most definitely been slimed.
Tentatively Harry reached out and touched the gooey mess currently coating his darling. “Its so slick.” He said, rubbing it between his fingers.
“You’re telling me?” Draco snarked, “It felt like I was swimming in a tub of extra, extra slippery wizard glide for a second there.”
Harry cocked his head to the side. “Wizard glide?”
Draco blithely continued, unaware of the sudden interested look on his husbands face. “Yeah, you could fit a giant troll’s dick up a pixie’s arse using that stuff.”
“You don’t say?” Harry drawled, a smile twitching at the corners of his lips.
“I do say.” Draco continued trying to clean himself off.
“Draco....” Harry licked his lips and advanced.
“What?” Draco finally glanced up to find an extremely predatory looking Harry bearing down on him. He held his gooey hands up in front of him. “Oh no you don’t Potter!”
Draco tried to take a step back, but of course, his feet slipped and he fell right in front of Harry. Looking up all he could see was his husbands evil little smile as Harry slithered closer. “Don’t even THINK about it Potter!” Draco yelped. “Don’t you dare!!!!!!!!”
*POUNCE*
On the other side of the clearing, a naked Filch bent to retrieve his thoroughly gummy cat.
“How are you my darling?” He purred as he inspected Mrs. Norris for injury.
“Meowrrrrrr.” The cat answered miserably.
“I know, I know.” Filch murmured. “We’ll get you cleaned up as soon as we get back to the castle.”
The scrawny man gazed across the clearing at the couple now entwined in a fiery dance as old as time itself.
“Animals.” Filch sniffed in disgust, covering Mrs. Norris eyes with one hand.
Inside its prison, a lime green blob of a monster also watched as the slime covered lovers passionately joined together....... and giggled hysterically.
Harry Potter-Malfoy, boy who lived, Savior of the wizarding world, and all around wicked cool, superhero, vampire, sex god stood stunned in the middle of a small clearing in the forbidden forest as what looked like a giant, highly pissed off blob of lime green jell-o attacked and ATE his brand new, also super cool, vampire, blond, sex kitten of a husband, Draco Malfoy-Potter.
By Merlin’s crusty arse crack, this would never do!
Harry raised his wand and pointed it determinedly at the blob. This big booger had no idea of who it was messing with! He was Harry Bloody Potter! - Malfoy.
“Accio Draco and cat!” Harry bellowed, putting all his magical might behind the spell.
Draco Malfoy-Potter and Mrs. Norris were summarily ripped from the bowels of the fiendish glob of goo by Harry’s spell. With a wet squelching sound both his beloved husband and a yowling cat came flying at Harry full speed.
The three of them collided and fell to the ground in a sticky pile as the blob roared its fury and began to slither across the ground to where they lay in a tangled up mess. Harry managed to roll Draco off of him long enough to point his wand in the monsters direction again.
“Encarsarus!” Harry yelled. Immediately the beast was surrounded by an invisible but inescapable energy bubble.
Now that the danger was past, Harry and Draco set about untangling themselves and Mrs. Norris. Finally they were all free, though unquestionably icky.
Draco face twisted horribly and he spat. “Yuck! That’s awful!”
Mrs. Norris seemed to be of the same opinion. She was rolling around and spitting like she had swallowed the worlds biggest hair ball.
Harry couldn’t help the small smile that crept across his face at the sight of his immaculate, always so perfect husband looking like he’d been jell-o wrestling and lost. Draco’s hair was sticking up in all sorts of directions and his skin had a slight green tinge to it where he had been in contact with the creature.
A plump pink bottom lip slowly poked out and began to tremble. “I’ve been slimed Harry!” Draco wailed.
There was no arguing with that. Draco had most definitely been slimed.
Tentatively Harry reached out and touched the gooey mess currently coating his darling. “Its so slick.” He said, rubbing it between his fingers.
“You’re telling me?” Draco snarked, “It felt like I was swimming in a tub of extra, extra slippery wizard glide for a second there.”
Harry cocked his head to the side. “Wizard glide?”
Draco blithely continued, unaware of the sudden interested look on his husbands face. “Yeah, you could fit a giant troll’s dick up a pixie’s arse using that stuff.”
“You don’t say?” Harry drawled, a smile twitching at the corners of his lips.
“I do say.” Draco continued trying to clean himself off.
“Draco....” Harry licked his lips and advanced.
“What?” Draco finally glanced up to find an extremely predatory looking Harry bearing down on him. He held his gooey hands up in front of him. “Oh no you don’t Potter!”
Draco tried to take a step back, but of course, his feet slipped and he fell right in front of Harry. Looking up all he could see was his husbands evil little smile as Harry slithered closer. “Don’t even THINK about it Potter!” Draco yelped. “Don’t you dare!!!!!!!!”
*POUNCE*
On the other side of the clearing, a naked Filch bent to retrieve his thoroughly gummy cat.
“How are you my darling?” He purred as he inspected Mrs. Norris for injury.
“Meowrrrrrr.” The cat answered miserably.
“I know, I know.” Filch murmured. “We’ll get you cleaned up as soon as we get back to the castle.”
The scrawny man gazed across the clearing at the couple now entwined in a fiery dance as old as time itself.
“Animals.” Filch sniffed in disgust, covering Mrs. Norris eyes with one hand.
Inside its prison, a lime green blob of a monster also watched as the slime covered lovers passionately joined together....... and giggled hysterically.