My Beautiful Dragon

**Warning, this chapter is very dark and contains a graphic rape scene. If this is not what you want to read then DON'T. I am only responsible for writing it, not for you reading it, so the decision lies with you. Don't sue me, you were warned. **



In my head





It was cold, so cold. Everything had become eerily quiet, except perhaps for the occasional sob from a handful of shocked Death Eaters. Rage, despair and a strong smell of blood and death looming in the still air were all that remained. He lay there, listening, contemplating whether or not he should try to make a move when he felt himself being lifted from his face-down position and cold hands dragging him away; where to was anyone's guess.



His eyes opened slowly, and his breathing became erratic as he tried to focus on his new surroundings. He could see a lot of trees and overgrown rose bushes, but still, he didn't know where he was. The sky was dark, a few stars appearing above his head, and a soft breeze blowing causing the leaves to lift from the ground to dance around him. He tried to sit up but found himself restrained by four pairs of hands. His eyes searched frantically for any means of escape and fell upon his captors. Four hooded figures stood over him; two of them he recognised as the notorious Death Eaters Avery and Nott, and the other two had their faces hidden. He felt the nausea rising slowly to his throat and tried to scream, but no sound came out. One of the faceless Death Eaters spoke and he was sure he recognised the voice.



"Well, well, Potter, the Golden Boy has finally crumbled," he drawled. He didn't sound happy. Harry shifted nervously from his position under a tree and tried to crawl away. "Not so fast, Potter, I think you need to be taught a lesson, after all YOU DID MURDER OUR MASTER!" he shouted and motioned to his other Death Eaters. "Bind him."



Harry didn't have time to register what was about to happen before Nott muttered the 'Incarcerous' spell and aimed it at him. The raven-haired boy began to struggle as he felt his arms being pulled above his head and his wrists bound with ropes. A scream formed deep inside his throat, but no sound came out of his mouth. Another set of ropes were tied to his ankles, causing his legs to be pulled as far apart as they could be without dislocating them from the hip bone. Still, he continued to struggle against the binds until he couldn't struggle anymore.



"Crucio!" the familiar voice spat. Harry's body convulsed and twitched as the pain became unbearable. "Leave us, my friends. Go back and check on the other traitor; I'll deal with him once I'm finished with Potter." The others nodded and vanished without another word.



Harry, becoming light-headed and nauseous from the Cruciatus Curse, wasn't aware of his robes being torn from him and exposing his bruised and bloodied body. He barely felt the rough hands on him or the fingernails cutting into his flesh. What he did feel was the immense pain as the Death Eater entered his tight entrance.

"Noooooooo! Please, Merlin, no!" He closed his eyes as the Death Eater thrust into him and ripped his insides to shreds. As the ordeal continued, Harry lost all track of time and all sense of reality until he heard his attacker let out a deafening yell. He felt nothing, no arousal, no softly spoken words, just a sharp pain and a feeling of disgust, despair and loneliness as the realization sank in. 'I lost my fucking virginity to a fuckin' Death Eater... how alluring…' he thought.



Hot tears fought their way out of his emerald eyes and fell to the ground on which he lay. He tried to move but realised his attacker was still on top of him, pinning him to the ground. He was about to speak when the cold drawl interrupted his thoughts.

"You do realise, Potter, that since you are responsible for the death of my master, I owe it to him to make you pay. What you have just experienced will make you hate yourself so much you'll be finding ways to end your tainted little life. This will slowly break you, Potter, and living with the memories, the pain, and disgust will drain every bit of your will to live from you." He got off of Harry's limp body and released the binds from the younger boy. "Oh, and don't think of mentioning this to your Muggle-loving friends, or I will make sure you never have the ability to speak again. Understand?"



Harry could only groan in answer as darkness spilled over him, then a sudden popping sound made it clear to him that he was now alone. Curling himself into foetal position, he closed his eyes and let the tears spill out. All he wanted right now was to never wake up again.





Harry awoke with a start and tried to control his breathing. His glasses were still on and his hair, he noticed, was stuck to his head with sweat from the nightmare. This was the tenth night in a row he'd had this nightmare. It seemed to be an ongoing replay in his mind, night after night, and he knew that the words that had been spoken were true. 'This will slowly break you, Potter.’ It was slowly breaking him already. He was a mess. His eyes were no longer the vibrant emerald-green; they seemed dead and lacked any sign of mischief and spark. Dark lines had appeared under them, and because of his pallid colour, he looked ghostly. If he thought about it, this bothered him more than Voldemort used to. At least he knew where he stood with him. The Dark Lord had wanted Harry dead from the day he was born, so that was something he'd grown up with, but rape? He'd only ever heard of the word and its context from the Muggle newspapers his relatives used to read. He could remember his uncle Vernon talking about a young fifteen year old Muggle girl who had been raped while walking home from school; then looked at Harry as he said, 'What's this world coming to? People like that need help. Freaks, that’s what they are.' Harry shivered and slowly sat up, realising he was still in the common room. He squinted at the window and noticed the sky was becoming lighter. He sighed and rubbed his tired eyes. Looking across to the other occupied chair, he realised Ron was watching him in bewilderment.



"Erm, how long have you been awake, Ron?" Harry asked, feeling a bit uneasy.



"Since you started yelling 'get off me you bastard' to no one in particular." Harry looked away, feeling both embarrassed and disgusted. "What's going on, Harry? You can talk to me, you know."



Harry got up from the chair and crossed the room, a sudden need to be alone surrounding him in all its glory. He looked back at Ron and smiled weakly.



"I'll be fine, Ron; I'm just having a few problems dealing with recent events… that's all. I need some fresh air, mate. See you at breakfast." And with that, he turned and left the common room, quietly closing the door behind him.



He didn't know where he was going, but he knew it must have been around six in the morning. The corridors would be empty, and if he could dodge Filch, then he could make his way out to the grounds and take a walk by the lake. He needed to clear his head, needed to think. Not about his nightmares, but a certain Slytherin who had appeared to help him out during the final battle. "But why would Malfoy help me instead of his father?" he said, not realising he was thinking out loud. Harry found a spot by the lake under a tree. A gap in the tops of the trees told him it was going to be a warm day. The sun was starting to push its way out from behind the clouds already. He glanced across at Hagrid's hut, wondering if the giant would be up yet. He needed to talk to someone. As he made up his mind to go to Hagrid’s, the sound of a twig snapping in two stopped him in mid-thought. He tried to control his breathing and looked around to see where the noise had come from. Feeling somewhat uneasy, Harry decided to make his way back to the safety of the castle and take a shower before joining his friends at breakfast.



Unknown to Harry, a lone figure was watching him, from the Forbidden Forest, safely hidden by the trees. The young blond boy watched as Harry stared at the sky, and he watched as Harry cried into his hands. He watched as Harry looked in his direction after he stupidly stepped on a twig. He watched as Harry made his way back to the castle, a small tear escaping from his beautiful grey eyes. As he wiped it away, he whispered, "I love you, Harry, I always have," and then he turned away and slowly walked back to his hiding place. 'I have to see him, I just have to. Seeing him so broken and lost I just want to take him in my arms and never let him go. It’s threatening to break me down.' This was the blond's last thought as he drifted off to sleep in a small clearing near the entrance to the forest.





TBC