Prank Wars

Disclaimer: I don\'t own any of this, and I\'m not making money off of this.

Warnings: Maybe a little language.

A/N: He, he. You guys are going to love this chapter. Don’t want to give too much away, but Harry pulls the first prank of the year… and Draco is put into a dimension of pissed off he has never been before. It’s great. Let’s get to it then.

The train ride to Hogwarts was boring so far. Harry and Ron were playing a game of wizard’s chess, and Hermione was reading Guide to Advanced Transfiguration for her N.E.W.T. qualification exam.

“Knight to E5,” Ron stated before his knight pummeled Harry’s queen to oblivion.

“How brutal,” Hermione muttered.

But the two paid no attention to her comment. She would grumble something along those lines every time one of the pieces would get smashed.

“So, Ron, any news on the pranks yet?” Harry asked to try and make conversation.

“Kind of. I overheard Seamus and Dean talking about flooding out the Slytherin dungeons. Not too sure when, though,” he said lazily.

Hermione gave them a frown. “You two need to keep you minds on N.E.W.T.’s.”

Ron rolled his eyes. “It’s all in good fun. Besides, we need something to take our minds off of those bloody tests.”

“Yeah, Hermione. You have to take a break from learning every now and then to keep the brain rested,” Harry agreed.

Hermione snorted. “That’s what sleep is for. And ideas like that are the reasons why there are so many slackers today. If everyone stopped putting there silly antics first and there work second, this world would be so much more productive.”

Harry and Ron began to die laughing.

“Hermione, that sounds a lot like communism,” Harry said.

“You’re a commie!” Ron cried out.

“I am not a communist. I just think—”

“Hermione’s a commie! ‘Mione’s a commie,” they sang together.

If looks could kill, Harry and Ron would be dead because Hermione was giving them the best death glare she could muster, but this was only making them chortle harder.

She huffed in anger and returned to her book.

Harry and Ron just continued their game until Ron trashed Harry’s king. They all decided to change into their school robes, due to the fact that it was black outside the window.

They sat patiently until screams began to come from outside their compartment.

“What the bloody hell is that?!” Ron asked with a shocked mug.

Harry sprang up and opened the door only to heave backwards with disgust. A brown mist was thick in the air along the hall.

“Dungbombs!” Hermione shouted as Harry tried to pull the door shut, but a hand stopped it from closing.

Draco jumped inside and drew his hand back to throw a dungbomb, but before he could Harry had his wand out.

“Petrificus Totalus!” Harry barked at Draco and he froze before throwing the dungbomb.

Harry then pried the dungbomb from his hands and tossed it out into the hall before closing and locking the door.

Harry smirked at Draco. “What to do with you?” he thought aloud.

“We should hex him for trying to hit you with that nasty thing,” Ron snarled towards Draco’s paralyzed body.

“Hmmm, I don’t think that would do the trick,” Harry murmured.

“We aren’t going to do anything to him,” Hermione shot out.

“Ha, oh yes I will,” Harry said with a twisted grin.

He pulled open Draco’s robes and waved his wand over Draco’s chest and stomach. Black letters began to take form. The words “I Am Harry Potter’s Bitch” appeared across the exposed flesh.

Harry took in a sharp breath after eyeing Draco’s body. ‘He looks good’ Harry thought. Draco was ghostly pale, but had a perfectly toned body. He wasn’t bulky, but had nice and lean muscles. Harry had to shake off a few dirty thoughts.

Draco couldn’t believe what was going on. He was trying desperately to free himself, but to no prevail.

Hermione’s jaw dropped and Ron snickered.

“That’s great, Harry,” Ron blurted out with a huge smile.

“And that won’t come off,” Harry said with another frightening smirk. “Only I can remove it. Seamus taught me it last year. Filch kept removing his graffiti, so he found this handy little permanent marking spell. And I don’t think I’m removing it anytime soon. I kind of like it. It brings out the color in his eyes, don’t you think?”

Draco’s mind went racing. ‘What did he put on me?!’ he thought. His head was turned so that he couldn’t see what Harry had done.

Hermione snorted. “Harry,” she shook her head in amazement. “I am Harry Potter’s bitch,” she spoke aloud the words written across Draco’s upper body. “That is genius.”

Draco could have spit nails he was so mad. In fact, he would have if he hadn’t been struck by that binding curse. ‘I’m going to kill you, Potter.’

Harry laughed. “Thank you.”

“So what do we do with him now?” Ron asked.

It was Hermione’s turn to grow a devious smirk. “Let’s strip him down and put him out in the hall.”

Both Ron and Harry’s mouths fell open.

“Hermione, are you mad?!” Ron asked in amazement.

“May seem that way to you,” she said softly. “It’s a fine line between genius and insanity.”

Harry laughed. “I think it’s a great idea.”

Draco could not believe what he was hearing. He was trying harder than ever to break free, but still to no use.

“Besides,” Harry leaned in close to Draco, “I get to see you naked.”

Harry licked his lips and Draco about melted into the floor. ‘Merlin, was that hot?!’ Draco asked himself.

Harry smirked and began to take off the Slytherin’s clothes slowly, allowing his hands to pass over exposed flesh. Harry never tore his eyes away from Draco’s. In some way, he knew the blond was getting great pleasure from this.

‘Damn you, Potter, with your soft hands… This feels so good… No! Potter can’t do this to me. I’m going to rip him limb from limb when I get this bloody curse lifted. And then I might do a little more… NO! Stop thinking that way! I hate Potter! Even if he does look gorgeous with that gleam in his eye… Shit! Stop it!’ Draco’s mind raced.

Within minutes, Harry had stripped him down to his silky green boxers. ‘Wow. I didn’t know Malfoy was this hot,’ Harry thought. Draco was very lean and toned. His body was a milky white, and Harry was mesmerized by him.

The train was coming to a stop so Harry and Hermione moved Draco out into the hall and propped him against the window. Harry gave Draco one last grin before pulling his boxers down to his ankles. Hermione giggled slightly and Ron just shook his head.

The Hogwarts Express came to a halt, and people began to come out of their compartments. The trio just laughed and made their way off the train. As they were leaving they could here people scream from were Draco was. A few catcalls could be heard, and even someone that sounded a lot like Seamus Finnigan yelled, “I knew it!”

Harry stepped off the train and looked very pleased with himself. “This is going to be a good year,” he muttered under his breath.

A/N: I love this chapter. It\'s a bit short, but probably one of my favorites so far. Very funny. I usually update every three or four days, but with all the nice reviews I received I felt obligated to give you chapter two. So there it was. Hope you liked it. It was originally a bit longer, but I decided to hold the rest off until chapter three. And remember, the more reviews I get the more likely I am to post a new chapter early. He, he.

Thanks a bunch,

Morgane