Living a Lie: Draco Malfoy

Disclaimer: JK Rowling and those associated with her are the owners of all things Harry Potter.
Notes: This chapter skips ahead one week, just because I won’t have to write a bunch of first week stuff.

~~~ As was usual when I was scared Father had me sitting on his lap. I was nearly five years old and even though the house-elves were taking care of it at that very instant I was still scared of the new infestation of garden gnomes; they were creepy little creatures, noisy, and smelled funny. Father’s lips were locked with mine in a tender loving kiss and his hands were running down my back and down my butt. I loved it when he held me- it made me feel special. I suddenly became aware of his hardened penis poking at my thigh. He must have noticed me noticing because he then whispered in his husky voice, “Stroke me Draco.” I nodded and shifted so that I was sitting upon one of his thighs. I unzipped his pants to reach in and pull out his manhood. My hands were so small, I had always been small for my age, and even by using both of them they could barely get a grip on his penis. I began stroking him and all thoughts of Garden Gnomes left my mind. I laid my head on his chest with a sigh of content and continued stroking.

Soon his breathing became deeper and quicker, and I wondered if he was going to squirt. It scared me when he did but he was always so happy afterward that I didn’t mind. I stroked him quicker and in response father said, “D-Draco put-put it in your mouth baby.” I nodded, climbed off his knee, and positioned myself between his legs. I wrapped my lips around his cock-head and began to suck it gently. I didn’t like the taste very much but I never said anything. He grunted as he guided my hands to his balls. It had been a year since we first started playing the suck-the-penis game but I still generally forgot about touching his balls; of course father never got mad at me for forgetting- he was understanding like that. Not to long afterward his milk squirted in my mouth and I began chocking. I quickly pulled away and spit up the milk; when he finished squirting I was still coughing slightly. He sighed and looked down at me, still between his knees, and I grinned up at him. He laughed and gathered me in his arms before giving me more of his love kisses. He pulled away from the kiss briefly to say, “You know I’d never hurt you right?” I nodded, “And that I love you,” I nodded again and he returned to kissing me- cleaning my mouth out with his tongue. ~~~


I woke up panting and I could feel my heart beating frantically. That dream always disturbed me although at the time I did not understand why. I felt that I should have felt comforted, like I was at the time, by such a dream, of being in my father’s arms, but I wasn’t and that unnerved me. I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock, which was standing side by side with the clothes closet, that was glowing by a forever-lumos spell; it was only four in the morning; I had only been asleep for two hours!

I groaned. I had been up all night studying for Arithmancy and Ancient Runes and really needed to sleep. It was only the fourth day of the term and I was already stressed. I had been scheduled to take NEWT Potions, NEWT History of Magic, NEWT Charms, NEWT Transfiguration, NEWT Arithmancy, NEWT Ancient Runes, NEWT Herbology, NEWT Care of Magical Creatures, NEWT Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Life Skills which didn’t start until Mid October. Now, I didn’t know what Life Skills was about - except for what it had said on my schedule which was: ‘Starts Saturday’s Mid October for Sixth Years see flyers for more information starting Sept 25th’ and at first I had been just as curious as anyone to know what this class, which no one had ever heard of before, was but after only a few hours of contemplating what the class was my other classes started and left me no time to think on the mystery class. From the very first day, hour even, it was obvious how difficult the year would be. The teachers didn’t even do their normal first day of class review or anything like that in fact they all dove right into new material picking up from where we finished. Clearly the professors were under some crazy misconception that if you achieved a good enough grade to get into their NEWT class then you were smart enough to retain the information over summer and didn’t need to be babied. The teachers had no problems assigning us a shit load of homework either; just on the first day I had been assigned to write a three foot essay for Snape, read four chapters in my Magical History book for Binns, practice four charms of the week for Flitwick, read two chapters in my Transfiguration book and write a foot long essay on what I learned from the reading for McGonagall.

I sighed and tried to fall back asleep but it was difficult with my dream still fresh in my mind.


I woke up a few hours later to the sound of heavy feet walking by my bed. I drew back my curtain and saw Gregory pacing around our clothes’ closet. “What’s wrong mate?” I yawned.

I jumped up slightly when Theodore, the completely opposite of Gregory, answered. “He’s been doing that for an hour already. He says he’s nervous because he is going to ask Millicent out on a date.”

“But Goyle,” I looked at him incredulously, “I thought you had given up on her?” Greg had had a crush on Millie since our second year but he had never had the nerves to ask her out. Last year, on the last day of school, he had declared that he would ask her out when we got back to school. We had all laughed at him not thinking he was serious but obviously we were wrong.

“No!” He huffed, “I’d never give up on her. I just…I was waiting for the right moment but now…well, I just want to get it over with, I figure if I do it now, then maybe the school will forget it by Halloween.”

“In other words,” said Blaise who had just walked out of the bathroom in his birthday suit, “he knows she’s going to say no and figures if he humiliates himself now no one will remember by graduation.” He waved his wand and the radio that sat upon his desk began playing a raunchy fast-pace dance song; it was ritual in our dorm to listen to ‘Down and Dirty Dancing in the Mornings’ with Poseidon the Powerful. Blaise ran a hand through his hair and then started dancing-still naked of course; his dark skin glistening with a ‘just out of the shower’ look. He did it nearly every morning but even after five years it made me laugh. Vincent, who had just woken and was the only one who of us that was truly disturbed by Blaise’s exotic dancing, exchanged a look of disgust with Theodore and then sauntered over to the bathroom.

Blaise, his hands over his head, began grinding his groin against his bed post causing Theo to sneer, “Why do you insist on doing that?”

“Because I’m just that good.” Blaise replied as he shook his ass toward Theodore. Theodore groaned and hid behind his bed curtains. I always suspected despite his cool attitudes toward him Theodore had ‘a thing’ for Blaise. Later I would find out I was right. Blaise winked at me and continued his dance.


At breakfast we were entertained by a fidgeting and fist clenched Gregory -for Millicent was flirting with a seventh year. “Calm down Greg.” I whispered to him. He grunted. When the seventh year finally walked away- about half way through breakfast- Gregory got up. For a second I thought Greg was going to approach the other boy but then I saw that he was headed toward Millie. I noticed she was watching me watch Greg so I looked down at my plate of eggs but as soon as I heard him stuttering I, along with the rest of those nearby, looked right back up

“So..So….M-Millicent.”

“Yes?” She said sweetly. Now upon looking at Millie you wouldn’t think she was all that sweet or even nice. But she was. Very nice, and very sweet, of course she was ambitious- as it’s sort of a requirement to be so to be in Slytherin House but she never went out of the way to hurt people and would give you the shirt off her back; this was something Pansy often took advantage of.

“Do…do….” Greg continued to stutter, “Do…w-would you like to, er, well, what I mean to say is…the next Hogsmeade weekend…erm… will you go with me?”

Millicent looked sick for a moment and I seriously believed she was going to either puke, laugh, slap him, or faint; she did neither. Millicent blinked and then grinned wickedly up and Greg and said: “Gregory Goyle I’ve been waiting for you to ask me that since third year. Yes, of course I’ll go to Hogesmeade with you!”

Everyone in hearing distance congratulated Goyle. I was just about to congratulate him when I noticed Pansy looking at me expectantly. I turned back to my eggs. She had always assumed that I would ask her out one day, and although I did ask her to the Yule Ball in fourth year it was only because Mandy Brocklehurst of Ravenclaw turned me down- not that I truly wanted to go with either of them I was- still am- gay and would have much preferred walking hand in hand with a nice pureblood boy, but I couldn’t go with Gregory- he was completely straight, and Vince was a bit of a homophobe so I’d dare not ask him, and any other boy would have surely turned me down or informed the entire school of my preferences-something I didn’t quiet yet want to be known. I didn’t look up again until I felt Greg sit next to me.

As I left the Great Hall with a quiet Vince and an unusually smug looking Gregory I noticed Pansy flirting with a fifth year boy and it occurred to me for the first time that sixth year very well might be a turning point in my life.

I was only all too right.


a/n: So what do you think? I’ve been working on this for a while and figured it was a good time to put out since one of my other stories is finally coming to an end.