Warning Signs

Title: Warning Signs
Chapter Title: Aftermath and Beginning
Characters: Hermione, Tonks
Genres: Romance, Angst, Drama, Tragedy, Action/Adventure, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort
Rating: Innocent-ish(PG-13)
Warnings: Sexual Content, Adult Language, Major Fluff, Spoilers
Summary: Tonks blames herself for Sirius\'s death. She\'s been drinking herself silly and hasn\'t spoken to anyone for over a week, and gets an unexpected visit from a certain someone that she loves. This chapter has been revised and contains new content.

Spoiler Warning: This chapter contains spoilers from Goblet of Fire (Book 4) and Order of the Phoenix (Book 5). You\'ve been warned. Other disclaimers can be found in the prologue. That being said, enjoy the story.


Sirius was dead by Bellatrix Lestrange’s hand and it was my fault. I had her cornered and was supposed to keep her at bay when the Death Eater‘s were searching the Department of Mysteries for the legendary Prophecy that would supply Lord Voldemort with the answers to defeating Harry Potter. Instead, I had foolishly gotten distracted and she had sent a stunning curse right at my chest, so powerful that it had rendered me immediately unconscious.

What happened after that was a blur. I remember waking up in St. Mungo’s Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries two days later with a headache the size of the Eiffel Tower. I had never been so effected physically and mentally by a stunning curse in my life. I felt like I suffered a serious concussion and my head had been split in two.

Remus Lupin, a fellow Auror and a good friend of mine, was standing beside my hospital bed. He stared down at me with wary eyes and I knew something had gone terribly wrong because of the look on his face. His eyes, which were normally vibrant and joyful, were full of sorrow and pain. His hair was shaggier than usual, and his clothes looked rumpled and worn, as if he had been wearing them for years.

I groaned and sat up, running my fingers through my hair nervously. Though I already knew the answer, I asked anyway. “What happened to me?”

Lupin sighed, taking my hand in his own. “You were hit with a stunning curse from Bellatrix Lestrange. You were fighting above ground so you fell from quite ways up, broke a few bones, which is why you needed to come to the hospital. Tonks… I am afraid I have some very bad news.”

Immediately my body went rigid and my heart seemed to leap into my throat. “Hermione’s dead? I failed, didn’t I?”

Lupin shook his head. “No! No, nothing like that. Though someone did die two days ago in the Department of Mysteries… I am afraid that Sirius Black is no longer with us among the living. Bellatrix Lestrange managed to kill him after you were rendered unconscious…”

I blinked back tears, biting my lip hard enough to make it bleed. “Sirius is dead?”

Lupin nodded, squeezing my hand. “I’m afraid so… I am sorry, Tonks. I know you two barely knew one another, but… It must come as quite a shock.”

I nodded my head, feeling tears in my eyes. My cousin was dead. He was dead and it was my fault. My stupidity had killed him…

Sirius had been a very noble man. He was Harry Potter’s godfather and I imagined that Harry was feeling even worse than I was, blaming himself as well. But it wasn’t him who could have prevented his death, it was I. I had the chance and I blew it, I looked away for a second and that was all it took for Bellatrix to catch me off-guard.

They released me from St. Mungo’s that night and by then I was feeling absolutely miserable. I retired to my flat in London, greeted heartily by a hungry Squeaks, my three-year-old black cat. Her yellow eyes inspected me curiously, sensing despair as I placed food and water into her two dishes and then, without another word, collapsed on my favorite leather couch in my spacious living room.

There were three messages on my answering machine. I sighed, rubbing my eyes, feeling tired but knowing I would never get to sleep. I stood up and went into the open kitchen facing the living room where Squeaks was eating as if I had not fed her in ages, and listened to the voices that droned out of the answering machine as I rummaged around my refrigerator for alcohol.

The first was, most naturally, from Cornelius Fudge. “Oh, Tonks. I am so sorry to hear about your cousin, Sirius Black. I would like you to let me know as soon as possible when you will be coming back to work. You may take as much time off as you need to grieve. Good day to you, Nymphadora.”

I twisted off the cap of a beer and drank to my hearts content. The next message was a fluke, and the third was from my mother.

“Nymphadora? Where are you? Haven’t you heard about Sirius? Won’t you be coming home soon? We should talk about this if you are having any ill feelings about his death. Call me soon, okay? And I don’t understand why you insist communicating through this Muggle device! You know how much I loathe Muggle’s! Love you, bye.”

I rolled my eyes. Andromeda Tonks, my dearest Mum, was one of the biggest pains in my ass at the moment. I wanted to be angry, depressed, and maybe even suicidal. I had lost someone dear to me, someone that I had hardly gotten a chance to know and now there was no chance of ever knowing him, because I fucked everything up by being overpowered and he was dead.

I spent one week passed out on my living room crouch, bottles of beer strewn all about me. My flat looked like hell (but then again so did I) and Squeaks felt so neglected and disgusted with me that she attempted to jump out the window when I opened it to get some fresh air. Thank Merlin for quick reflexes.

I was just getting up to get another drink at about eight o’ clock sharp when my doorbell rang. I groaned inwardly, knowing it was probably my Mum. I hadn’t returned any of her calls and with each message she had to leave, the more infuriated she had sounded.

I was shocked to see Hermione Granger standing on my doorstep, looking as beautiful as I had ever seen her. Her hair looked straighter and less bushy, her teeth smaller and bright white as she smiled that smile that made my heart race a mile a minute inside of my small but ample bosom.

“Wotcher, Hermione,” I muttered, my voice a bit slurred. I hadn’t counted how many drinks I had consumed today and I had a slight buzz going on, so more than likely it had been a fair few.

She gasped, as she looked me over. “Tonks, you look… Merlin, you look awful!”

“Brilliant,” I snapped, unable to help myself. When she frowned, I softened my voice. “Would you like to come inside?” I asked, stepping cautiously away from the door. I knew I looked like complete and utter dung right now, but it was crushing to hear it from the girl that I was in love with.

Hermione stepped inside and noted the beer bottles strewn about all over the floor. Her eyebrows furrowed and I clumsily began to pick up the empty bottles and throw them in my trash that was there specifically for bottles.

“Sorry about the mess,” I muttered.

Hermione sighed. “You’ve been drinking.”

It wasn’t a question it was a statement. I put away the last bottle and simply nodded my head. “Yeah. Want some water? Tea?”

“What I want is for you to be okay,” she said, and the emotion in her voice made me feel as if I had been hit hard in the gut by an iron fist.

I lowered my eyes, not daring to look at her. “I’m alright, really,” I lied, through my teeth. I knew she wouldn’t buy it, but it was worth a shot.

The tone of her voice startled me briefly. “Don’t lie to me, Tonks.”

“Hermione, I really appreciate you coming here, I do. But there’s nothing you can do,” I said, sitting down on the couch. She sat down next to me, so close that our arms were touching.

“Tonks, please. Just talk to me. Is it about Sirius?”

The mention of his name brought tears to my eyes. “Yes.”

“It wasn’t your fault…” She murmured, reaching out and squeezing my hand.

“It was. It was entirely my fault,” I argued. The touch of her hand sent chills along my spine.

Hermione’s thumb stroked the back of my hand. “Tonks, please. Is this what Sirius would have wanted you to do after his death? Get drunk and wallow in self-pity?”

“I don’t know what he would have wanted, Hermione, that’s the problem. I was just getting to know him and he died. We could have been the best of friends or worst of enemies, but at least if he hadn’t of croaked I would have had the opportunity to get to know him better.”

Hermione reached with her free hand to wipe away a tear that had strayed down my cheek. “Tonks, Sirius is dead. I know that it is hard to accept, but you have to and you need to move on. There are people here that need you.”

I laughed bitterly, shaking my head. “Like who?”

“The Weasley’s, your co-workers at the Ministry…” Her voice trailed off and her cheeks turned pink. “…Me.”

My head lifted at this, her hand still rested comfortably on my cheek. “Y-you n-need me?” I stuttered, unable to help myself.

She smiled. “Yes, Tonks, I do. You shouldn’t blame yourself for Sirius. You did everything that you could to stop the Death Eater’s from hurting my friends and I. You were very brave and were just doing your job. You do it well, you know.” Her thumb trailed along my bottom lip and her blush deepened.

Merlin, did she understand what she was doing to me? But of course she didn’t, she was a teenager, she didn’t understand the complexities of lust. As far as I know Hermione had not been romantically involved with anyone as of yet. She was a virgin in every way.

I stared into Hermione’s eyes. I wanted to tell her everything. Wanted to tell her how I felt about her, tell her that I had been watching her grow up for so long and I was so impressed by the changes that I had seen. But I couldn’t, that would mean jeopardizing my position. But I was scared. I had failed Sirius and I could just as easily fail her.

“Thanks, Hermione,” I said, squeezing her hand. “I’ll try and get my life back on track, I promise.”

“Good. You’ve been worrying everyone to death,” she said. “What’s it like?” she asked.

“Hmm?”

“Working for the Ministry.”

I smiled. “It’s interesting, but can sometimes be very boring.”

Hermione chuckled. “Do you go out on a lot of assignments?”

I shrugged. “It all depends on how psychotic people are feeling. We mostly handle burglaries, muggings, and murders…”

“So you really are magical law enforcement? Like a Police Officer only with magic involved?”

I laughed, feeling instantly better with Hermione around me. “Sure, if you want to put it that way.”

“It sounds very interesting. I’d love to be an Auror when I become old enough. But you’re only in your twenties aren’t you? So you can become an Auror when you’re young, can’t you?”

I smiled, taking in all her questions. To tell you the truth, I liked the attention. It seemed like Hermione really wanted to get to know me and I was willing to accept her invitation with open arms, I wanted to be her friend now more than ever because I needed one. I knew that having a friendship with Hermione would hinder my mission, but I cared enough about her already without directly knowing her that at this point it didn’t matter to me. I needed comfort, I needed a shoulder to cry on.

“Yeah, I’m in my twenties, though I won’t divulge my age to you. Maybe some day, but not here and now. And, yes, you can become an Auror quite young, and I would think, Hermione, that you have the potential to do so. You are highly intelligent and you’ll have no problems whatsoever obtaining the grades that you need. All you will need to do is speak to Professor McGonagall about the requirements you need to become an Auror. Although I’d picture you to be more of a nurse or a medic myself.”

“Really?” she asked, beaming happily. “I’ve thought about becoming a healer, it seems like it would prove to be quite a challenge.”

“It is. It’s also very stressful, but you are a very kind-hearted person, Hermione, with great traits and an energetic personally. If you were a nurse, I am sure more than half the patients you take care of would fall in love with you.” I wanted to say just as I have but I knew in doing so I would start something we would never be able to finish. It was wrong feeling these things for Hermione, so very wrong. She was too young and I was too old. Merlin, she was just a child at sixteen-years-old.

To my surprise, Hermione blushed and looked away, biting her lip. I wondered if I had gone too far in saying such things. I probably had.

I wanted to get out of here and go for a walk. I didn’t want to be here alone with the girl that I had so many confused feelings about. I knew she couldn’t possibly feel the same way, as far as I know she wasn’t even a lesbian. Sure, she hadn’t dated any guys but she just hadn’t found the right one. She had been cozy with Viktor Krum during her fourth year, but they had never done anything, at least as far as I knew.

Hermione was watching me intently. I glanced about and then looked to her once again. “What?” I asked, wanting to know why she was staring at me.

“Nothing. Sorry,” she said, fidgeting with her hands as if she was nervous.

“Is there something going on that you wanted to talk to me about?” I asked. She had me hooked now. I couldn’t stop myself from prying. I mean, if she needed someone to talk to and I was there, why shouldn’t I offer? I wanted Hermione in my life; I wanted to do anything I could to help her out.

“It’s just…” her voice trailed off for a moment before she mustered the courage to continue. “I’ve always admired you, Tonks. You’re outspoken, friendly, cheerful, and very easy to get along with. You’re loads of fun to be with, but I never get the chance to spend time with you.”

I sighed. “I’ve been pretty busy lately, with Voldemort being back and all, and of course Sirius’s death. The public knows the Dark Lord’s returned and the Ministry is going nuts trying to stop him in his tracks. His Death Eater’s are everywhere, security has increased tenfold.”

She nodded her head, understanding. “I know. I just… I want to get to know you better,” she said, reaching out and touching my hand.

I looked to her hand upon mine and then into her eyes. Merlin, those eyes were going to be the death of me. The look on her face was so pure, so innocent, that it made my lower lip tremble as a fresh wave of desire coursed through me. Despite the arousal in my body I couldn’t rid the warning’s going through my mind, telling me to quit while I was ahead.

May heaven forgive me for my sins. I took her hand… and clung tightly.