Draco\'s Dilemma

A/N *I do not own them and will clean them when I am done* BP/incest/rape/cutting...do not read is it will bother you.



Draco entered the private parlor Tom had taken him to and stood staring at the table. It was set for two. He turned back to Tom the barkeep to ask if there had been a mistake in the parlor he was taken to but was looking at only the old mahogany door. Tom had left. Draco peered around the room. He had never stayed at the Leakey Cauldron before. His father always made the family stay at Blood Lines in Knockturn Ally. The difference between the two Inns was startling. The Leakey Cauldron parlor was much more inviting with lush red carpet and wood paneled walls with little nooks for books, photos and plants. The Blood Lines parlor looked more like a dungeon with a table in it. The parlor had a little sitting area off to one side. The chairs looked very inviting having plush pillow topers on their seats. This was where Draco decided to settle himself until who ever was dining with him arrived. When he sat down in one of the chairs a tea tray appeared. He was a bit startled by this but as he had only moments ago been thinking about having a cup he poured one, took a sip and shut his eyes letting the taste and aroma of the tea wash over him. When he opened his eyes he found he was looking at a book he was quite certain had not been there before. It was called Mind Power, A Guide to Occlumency and Legilimency. He picked the book up and began flipping through the pages and was soon absorbed by the text. Draco did not notice that another person had joined him in the parlor.

The man who had come in was dressed in a black robe, had a hooked nose, long black greasy hair and sallow skin. His name was Sevrus Snape and he was the Potions master at Hogwarts. He was also Draco\'s mentor. Sevrus stood just inside the door and watched as Draco poured over the book he had sent him. He looked at Draco with a certain amount of pride not unlike the way a father would look at a son upon finding him immersed in his studies and, quite frankly, it was a possibility that Draco might have been his son. There was a brief affair between himself and Draco\'s mother about nine months before Draco\'s birth. Only when he was born with toe-head blond hair like his mother and father did Sevrus rest easy. There had been no further contact between himself and Nracissa, but he hoped with the upcoming separation between the Malfoys that they would rekindle their love. With a light clearing of his throat, he made his presence known to Draco.

\"Sevrus!\" Draco bounded across the room and hugged the older man.

\"How have you been this summer little dragon?\" Sevrus held him in a fatherly embrace smiling to him self that one day soon it would be just that.

\"I\'ve been bored. I hate being stuck at the manor. Why could I not come to see you at the coast like last year?\" There was hurt in Draco\'s voice belaying his feeling of abandonment.

\"I was away, and anyhow how would it look if after your father\'s imprisonment if you left your mother alone?\" He tousled Draco hair and they moved over to the dining table.

\"So what would you like to eat?\"

Draco thought for a moment. He was not really hungry but he knew he would be scolded if he did not eat.

\"I\'ll have the fish and chips and a butterbeer.\"

\"That sounds excellent Draco. Make it two\"

Just as Sevrus finished speaking their dinner plates glowed and their food appeared on the table. They ate for a bit in companionable silence before Sevrus brought up the reason for his visit.

\"Did you like the text I sent you? It was the one I used when I was at school. I found the skills within it most useful when dealing with certain members of my class and even a few teachers, but we will keep that last bit between us, shall we.\"

\"Is this what I am to learn with you?\"

\"Yes Draco, you will need both skills in the coming years. We will have lessons during what would be your fifth class slot. I have taken you out of Care of Magical Creatures. The class will be known as Potions Special Project. It will be an official class and you will sit a N.E.W.T. (Nastily Exhausting Wizarding Test) at the end of next year.\"
Draco looked horrified. \"Don\'t worry you will sit the Occelmency/Ligelmency exam not an extra Potions one.\" Sevrus chuckled a bit at Draco\'s discomfort.

\"Will I still meet the Auror qualifications?\"

\"Yes, The class will count as on of the five N.E.W.T.s needed. That is assuming you pass.\" Draco took the bait and scowled at Sevrus. He was second in his year and Sevrus knew he would have no trouble with the class. As Sevrus smiled Draco cottoned on.

\"Well if you think that highly of me maybe I should fail on purpose.\"

Sevrus ignored this and continued on. \"I know the headmaster gave you some warnings and I must say that I do not agree with all of them. We both know what each other are and there is no sense in talking around it, however it can only be discussed in our lessons or in my office and never, NEVER, in front of anyone else or in the common room.\"

\"What do you take me for a git?\" Draco looked affronted at the lack of commonsense Sevrus thought he had.

\"Well sometimes you are a git Draco but that is not my point. What we are doing is very dangerous and no one can know. Both of our lives depend on it being kept a secret.\"

Draco nodded.

\"Um...Draco?\" Sevrus looked very tentative. \" There is something else you should be made aware of.\"

\"What is it?\" asked Draco. He was quite un-nerved at seeing Sevrus so shy.

\"There is some history between your mother and me. We dated at school and had to stop when the marriage was arranged between your mother and father. The thing is Draco, we still have feelings for each other. After the papers are final I would like to peruse a relationship with her. Would you be OK with that?\" Draco tried to conceal the grin that was threatening by stuffing a chip in his mouth.

After he swallowed Draco asked \"can I call you dad in class?\" Then started laughing again. Sevrus joined in the laughing now that his mind was at ease.

\"So are you all packed?\"

\"Yes dad\" Draco said with a smirk. Sevrus blushed and threw a chip at Draco.

When Draco made to throw it back, Sevrus glimpsed something on the boys arm.

\"Draco. What is this?\" He spoke in a harsh contrast to the joking tones from moments ago while grabbing Draco\'s arm. As he pushed the sleeve of Draco\'s robe up several fresh cuts were revealed. Draco wrenched his arm from Sevrus\'s grasp and fled across the room but was stopped from leaving by the locking charm Sevrus put on the door.

\"Is this what you meant when you said you were bored at the manor?\" Sevrus asked as he crossed the room and took hold of a struggling Draco. Draco remained silent. Sevrus lifted the boys face up to face him with a finger under the chin. \" Draco, what is this? When did this start?\"

\" I don\'t want to talk about it\" Draco tried to break free of the older mans grasp but Sevrus was not letting up.

A golden feather popped in the middle of the floor and Sevrus had no choice but to drop the matter and fetch it. A grim look crossed Sevrus\'s face before he grabbed at his forearm. \"Draco I must go, this conversation is not over. You will meet me in my office for your classes please finish reading before then.\" With a light pop he was gone. Draco stood stunned. He could not decide if he should be mortified that Sevrus had found the cuts or worried about his safety. If both the Order and the Dark Lord had contacted him then something big was going down. He paced for a few minutes then decided to go back up to his room. Grabbing the book, Draco left the parlor and headed upstairs.

***

Draco had a rough night. His dreams were more tormented than normal which was saying something. It had started out the same as always, the night the abuse started. He was sitting on his bed with his favorite book waiting for his father to read him a bedtime story. As his door opened his eyes lit up. His father had brought him a bole of ice cream. Draco was floored; he was never allowed to eat in his room. As he sat eating his ice cream, his book long forgotten, is father moved his hands to his pants. It was a dark stormy night and Draco was in his father\'s study sitting on the \"pillow\" waiting, his eyes fixes on the carving of a serpent across the room. August 31st, Draco crossed the day off his wall calendar marking the last night before he was to leave for school. His stomach felt like there were snakes writhing around in it and he reached for his rubbish bin and retched. He was not suffering from the nervous excitement one would expect from an eleven-year-old about to go to boarding school. No, Draco was living the shame and confusion of having been entered by hid father for the first time that night. A going away present his father had called it. As he relived the shame and pain of that night all at once, tears streamed down his face and he cried out into the empty room. Draco sat up in his ornate bed. He was twelve, home over Christmas Hols\' and had finally told his mother. She was furious. She had sent him to bed early and waited up for Lucius to get home. Draco heard the shouting and the sounds of flesh being smacked then the sickening thud of his mother\'s body hitting the wall.

Clomp Clomp Clomp Clomp

His father was running up the stairs and burst in to Draco\'s room. Even in the moonlight he could see the maniacal glint in his father\'s eyes. That night had marked the start of the physical abuse for Draco and his mother along with a new intensity of sexual abuse for Draco. His dad started inviting his friends to the sessions. The dream jumped again to the last time his father had abused him. It had been a private session and sadly that was not a blessing. When it was just the two of them it was always far worse. His father had taken to tying up his mother and making her watch. There was something new this time something he had blocked out.

\"I have ruined you for the rest of your life Draco. You are mine. When you have a son he will be yours and you will do to him just as I have done to you. It is the Malfoy way.\"

Draco screamed out in his sleep. \"NOOOO\" His body was twisted in the sheets so tightly that he could not free himself. He thrashed in bed trying to wake him self and with a thud fell to the floor when the sheet gave way and tore. Draco sat panting drenched in sweat.
His vision swam before him for a few moments. He got up and went to fetch a glass of water from the loo. After drinking several glasses of water Draco stared into the mirror.
\" I AM NOT HIM. I WILL NEVER BE LIKE HIM.\"

He shouted at his image willing him self to believe in his own inner strength. A shiny something caught his eye. There was an old razor blade in the rubbish bin. He picked it up and held it in his hand. His secret of cutting had been discovered but the intoxicating call of the blade slicing through his pale white skin freeing him from his pain was too much. Draco made sure the door was locked and then took off his shorts and stepped into the shower stall. Cleanup would be easier he thought almost smirking. Sitting on the floor Draco looked at the blade. The cool tile of the stall felt good against his bare body. He poised the blade on the inside of his left arm just above his elbow. He was almost drooling in anticipation and there was a distinct hunger in his normally cold grey eyes. He pressed down and dragged the blade across his skin. White heat flared for a moment but was quickly replaced when the adrenalin his body was overproducing hit him. He deepened the cut twice more until the blood dripped freely washing away his pain. Draco tilted his blond head back against the cool blue tile and shut his eyes living in just that moment.

He slowly exhaled and looked at his body. He was fit for 16, lean but with definition starting to show. His eyes lingered on his upper thigh and the trail made by the dripping blood. He picked up the blade again and cut into the trail using it as a guide. Again he deepened the cut then drew his fingers along the edges to irritate it further. The knot that had been in his stomach when he awoke was gone now. Draco closed his eyes again and sat for a few minutes stroking the cut with his thumb. When he opened his eyes again a new feeling, one of arousal, started to overtake him. His hand moved from the cut and he began to relieve this new tension then he turned on the tap and within moments fell a sleep where he sat.