Mystery Hogwarts Theater

MHT

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Chapter Two
Phase One of Draco’s Punishment
(Or the one where ‘Mione is a slut)
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Ron had finally regained consciousness and was trying, quite unsuccessfully, to draw Harry out of the corner he was in.

“Harry, mate, it’s over. Calm down, you need to get over it. It was just a story.”

“Horrible, absolutely horrible. It was sooo horrible.” Harry moaned, shaking his head in horror.

“Yes, it was, get over it!” Ron smacked Harry on the back of his head. The black haired teen blinked at him as a form of awareness flooded back into his eyes.

“Ow.” He pushed Ron, making the redhead fall over. “That was not at all needed.”

“Whatever.” Ron rolled his eyes uncaringly as he pushed himself up. “You’re the one who was in a corner talking to himself for two hours, so don’t get on me.”

“At least I didn’t go running, screaming like a girl, into a door.” Harry muttered. Ron glared at him and he glared back, until the redhead got up and stormed out of the room, leaving his friend with…Professor Snape.

Harry blinked, eyes wide and looked around. Seamus and Dean were somewhere, Ron had just run out, and Draco was gone as well.

“Umm…Hello Professor.” Harry said hesitantly. Black eyes focused on him for a moment and a shock went down Harry’s spine, like just Snape’s gaze was electric, and then the man turned away as a yellow light once again begin flashing in the room. Harry would have let out a sigh of relief if not for the fact he now had to deal with Voldemort again.

Really, that man was completely nutters. It was kind of disturbing actually. And he wasn’t even going to think about how Voldemort had managed to get them all here, he was only going to end up giving him a headache.

Ron, Seamus, Dean, and Draco all walked into the room just as the screen came on. It was Voldemort again, but this time he was wearing a white lab coat and had a few ‘doctor-ish’ items with him. Pettigrew was with him, hanging towards the back some.

*Voldie’s Lair*

“All present! Wonderful, I have two wonderful stories just for Draco.” He cackled slightly, not noticing the looks his captives were giving him.

*With the Boys*

“He’s quite mad isn’t he?” Seamus whispered to Dean. The black boy nodded.

“Yep, he’s pretty nuts.”

Snape gave them both annoyed looks. “This is nothing. I’ve worked for him for years, you haven’t begun to see ‘mad’”

*Voldie*

The Dark Lord stopped cackling long enough to notice no one was looking at himoy³HEY! I’m about to torture you horribly; the least you could do is listen to me. Humph.” He pouted a little bit then turned to Wormtail. “Send the first fic over. I’m going to my room.”

The Lord shuffled off and Peter was left staring at six very unhappy people. He shuffled his feet nervously.

“Hi. So…are you having fun?” Glares. “I suppose not then. So…I’ll just send the story. I hope you enjoy it.” And with a bright smile the rat waved and the screen went blank.

*Meanwhile*

“So…this is all Draco’s fault?” Harry asked, eyebrow going up.

“Yes.” Snape said tonelessly. The red light started flashing and everyone walked out less than cheerfully. They stopped briefly to Seamus to get a few things then once again walked into the theater.


***Disclaimer: Nothing is mine except the plot.

Draco: I don’t believe the author. Odds are there isn’t any kind of plot to begin with. ***A/n Please tell me what u think.

Seamus: I think this is going to be stupid.
Snape: I think it’s pitiful to be too lazy to type out ‘you’ in a story.
Harry: I think this is going to be painful and traumatizing. ***It was Hermionie's 6th year at Hogwarts and as she boarded the train she felt a little lonely.

Dean: I think they spelled Hermione wrong. *Blinks slowly* It can’t be that hard to spell can it?
Draco: Why does that sentence seem strange? It just…sounds wrong.

***Harry and Ron wouldn't be arriving on the n. n.

Seamus: Instead they’d be arriving by boat.
Snape: More likely by enchanted car.
Harry+Ron: *Blush*

***In fact they hat owled her

Ron: Hat Owled? Is that a specialty kind of owl post?
Draco: If it is I’m sure Potter had to pay for it.

***before and told her that they were on business with Mr. Weasley and that he would drop them off before the banquet.

Ron: On business? With *my* dad? Umm…okay, I doubt my mum would allow that.
Harry: What are the odds I’d be at the burrow and Hermione wouldn’t be? Or that we wouldn’t meet her in Diagon Alley? Or-
Snape: I think we get that it makes no sense Potter. Kindly shut your mouth. Hermionie Found and empty cabin

Draco: So…she found and emptied a cabin? Not that it’d be hard for her with that mouth of hers, but really.
Harry: *Glare at Draco* Is anyone else a little disturbed that Hermione apparently has no friends outside of Ron and me?
Ron: And what about Ginny? Or is she with us?

***at the back of the train and put her bags away. She felt a little tired so she fell asleep.

Ron: Okay, now I’m disturbed. ‘Mione is sleeping when she could be reading ahead of us in her books? Impossible.

***Unknown to her Draco Malfoy walked in five minutes later and locked the door.

Seamus: This seems like some kind of set up to a rape scene.
Draco: *Sneer* I wouldn’t touch that Mudblood if my life depended on it.
Ron: You’d better not…and don’t call her that! ***Hermionie was in the middle of a very vivid dream about her and Harry,

Harry: *Whimper* No fair, this was supposed to traumatize Draco! I haven’t done anything wrong!

***not that she had any feelings for him but she always fantasized about him.

Dean: So…fantasizing about someone, usually a sign of some form of attraction, means nothing for Hermione. Even though it’s always, always, Harry? And she has no feelings for him. That’s…new.
Seamus: Must have something to do with his 12 and a half-inch dick.
Harry: *Puts hands over ears while glaring at Seamus* ***~*~ Harry was kissing her neck while he slowly massaged her hotspot.

Draco: Hotspot. I suppose that’s better then G-spot at least.
Seamus: Not really…no.

***He then started massaging her breasts with his other had. "Oh Harry"

Seamus: {As Hermione} I forgot to mention, even though we’re doing this I really have no kinds of feeling for you. In fact I think I’m harboring feelings for Malfoy. So I’m just using you.
***He pulled off her shirt and bra and began to softly nibble at her nipples. ~*~

Seamus: Doesn’t nibble kind of imply that it was softly?
Harry: *Crying quietly*
Ron: *Pinches the bridge of his nose* I thought this was Draco punishment?
Draco: You’d just love to see me punished wound’s you Weasely?
Ron: Actually…yes.
Seamus: I bet you five Sickles they shag before we get back home.
Dean: …Sicko. …I bet you ten they kill each other mid-shag. ***Mean while Draco watched her with interest.

Draco: *twitch* No. Just no.

***He began to here VERY audible moans coming from the back of her thought.

Seamus: Did that sentence make sense and I just missed it?
Snape: No, it just made no sense.
Dean: Wait…maybe Draco can read minds and he heard moans from her thoughts.
Everyone else: *Stares*
Dean: …or not.

***Suddenly an idea came to him. He put a silencing spell on the compartment then walked up to her.

Draco: *Looks slightly afraid* Can we turn this off now?
Harry: *Recovered* Nope. If I had to sit through that other one, you have to sit through this. ***He stuffed his hand down her skirt and into her panties and slowly worked her hotspot.
Seamus: *On the ground in hysterics*
Dean: *Snort* Heh…this is either really funny or disturbing.
Ron: *Looks sick* She could wake up anytime now and end this and I wouldn’t complain.
***"She's VERY wet," he thought.

Seamus: I may not understand a lot about the female body, but wouldn’t something this wake her up?
Ron: One would hope. ***He then started laying soft kisses along her neckline; she let out a loud moan, and put his mouth up to her ear, nibbled it and then said,

Harry: April Fools!
Dean: Can you hear me now? …Good.
Seamus: *Whispers* I see dead people. They do the Polka late at night.
Ron: The Polka?
Seamus: *Nods seriously* The Polka. ***"You like that you little mud blood?"

Seamus: {As Hermione} *yawns* I’ve had better
Dean: {As Hermione} You had me up until that Mudblood thing. Major turn off.
Draco: Would anyone care if I killed myself right now? Silence
***Hermionie's eyes flew open; she was about to scream at him when he started massaging her pussy again.

Dean: Funny, I don’t think that’s really a great way to get a girl you’ve decided to grope to shut up.
Seamus: I’m telling you it isn’t. If a girl wants you to stop she’ll let you know. ***"This isn't so bad" she thought,

Ron: yeah, the person she hates most in the world is only assaulting her. This is perfectly normal and alright.
Draco: *Buries his head in his hands*

***then backed up to the wall and held his hand into her.

Snape: Wasn’t she sitting down? Or has Ms. Granger mastered the ability of sleeping upright?
Dean: Into her? *Twitch* O-kay, ***Draco's eyes were wide

Seamus: {As Draco} You would not believe the horrors I have seen. It was all so terrible.
Draco: Shut up Finnigan.

***and then he leaned into her and reached his hand up her shirt. She smiled as he moaned.

Dean: Now, at the risk of my own sanity, I’m trying to picture this in my mind. Help?
Seamus: I think Draco’s hand is up her skirt while the other is up her shirt and…they’re pressed against a wall.
Dean: Ah.

***Suddenly the train stopped and Draco was pushed harder into her causing her to moan in pain and pleasure at the same time.

Harry: Talk about excessive information.
Snape: The rain stopped…is there a reason? Trains don’t normally just…stop.
Ron: Maybe it’s at Hogwarts. ***They got up with out a word when Draco pushed her against the wall

Harry: They got up when Draco pushed her into a wall? Where they on the ground to begin with?
Ron: *Shrugs* I guess the author wants us to play fill in the missing statement.

***and rubbed his hips against hers. "Granger?"
Seamus: Talk about lack of etiquette. You don’t call a girl by her last name when you’re shagging.
Snape: I’m shocked you know the meaning of the word etiquette let alone are able to use it in a sentence.
***"Yes Malfoy?" Hermionie replied between their passionate kisses. "Will you

Dean: {As Draco} Marry me?
Seamus: {As Hermione} Of course!
Ron: They run off, get married, end of story. Let’s leave.
[Ron gets up and is struck with a bolt of lightening then vanishes.]
Seamus: Holy fuck.

***ride in the carriage with me?" "Yes," and with that they left the train.

Chapter Two

Snape: I can now say, with all certainty, there is no god.

**A/n I made a mistake in the last chapter Hermionie is in her 7th year and she and Draco are Hb and Hg, so I hope that's all. By the way I need a beta reader.
Seamus: No shit.
Harry: …Do you think Ron’s coming back?
Draco: What are a HB and HG?
Seamus: Well HG is obviously Hermione Granger…I don’t know what HB is though.
Snape: Head Girl and Head Boy, something none of you are ever going to achieve, obviously.
***Hermionie walked with Draco to the carriage.

Seamus: And no one noticed that these two were together or that Draco was without his goons.
Snape: I’m hardly surprised. The intelligence of the student body never ceases to depress me after all.
Harry: *Blinks* Really? I thought you were just moody.
Snape: *Note of disbelief* Moody?

***When they got in Draco decided to talk to her.

Dean: Doesn’t that talking usually come first?
Seamus: Nope, the guy usually comes first.
Dean: Oh, that was sick. ***"So what exactly were you dreaming about?"

Harry: This is the first time they’ve had a civil conversation and already he’s up to what she dreams about? I don’t think he has that privilege yet. ***Not wanting him to know she thought up a lie, "I was dreaming about you shagging me senseless."

Dean: Liar. ***"Oh really?" he replied with his trademark smirk.

Harry: {As Hermione} Okay, you caught me, I lied. ***He leaned into her and kissed her, then bit her lip

Dean: You know, some people would consider that mean.
Seamus: Maybe she’s into pain. *Shrugs*

***as if begging her to let him in. She accepted, and their tongs played war

Dean: *Brandishes a set of tongs* Have at you sir
Seamus: *With ice tongs* You shall feel the sting of my steel…plastic.
[They battle furiously, Dean eventually smacking Seamus with his plastic tongs. The blond falls from his chair to the ground and stays still. Then twitches. Dean and Harry giggle.]
Snape: …This must be hell.
Harry: If they’re playing war does that mean little toy soldiers were involved?

***while his hand slipped up unnoticed under her skirt. She realized this

Harry: I thought it went unnoticed? The author should really stop contradicting themselves so much.
Draco: *Muttering* The author should learn something about writing in character. I hate Granger, she’s a Mudblood, everything I’ve been raised to hate! I’d rather sleep with the Weasel, at least he’s a pureblood, Muggle lover or not.
Snape: I’ll be sure to tell Mr. Weasley you said that.

***and shifted to allow him better access. He slowly entered one finger into her and moved it up and down, then two.

Seamus: Then he moved it two? How does one move two?
Dean: Probably means he was using two fingers.
Seamus: Well why didn’t they say that?

***When they were minutes from the school he started banging her

Draco: *Hopefully* Head into the wall, killing her? End of story?
Harry: *Smirk* You wish.

***hard (with his fingers still) she was forced against the wall as she let out a loud moan.

Snape: The grammar and punctuation is steadily getting worse as we go along.
Harry: At least it isn’t as bad as that last one.
Snape: Very true Mr. Potter.

***Her hands were in his hair when the carriage stopped. She quickly neatened up and walked out the carriage

Seamus: That was it? Not even a goodbye? A handshake? She just ‘neatened’ up and left. I hate to say this, but I think ‘Mione’s a bit of a slut here.
Draco: Yes, that it! She’s practically throwing herself at me, I’m your average red-blooded guy, how can I say no?

***feeling very wet and flustered as she walked up to the Great Hall.

Dean: Well no shit, I don’t think she came once.
Harry: You noticed that as well? Two chapters and nothing. I think Draco needs a little practice.
Draco: Well at least I’ve had *some* practice, unlike you and your virginal band of idiots.
Seamus: Sucking up to teachers doesn’t count, nor does kissing your father’s ass.
Dean: …*trying desperately to keep the bad images out of his head* ***A/n: Hope you like a bit cliffy and I will add more plot in later I promise. I REALLY need a beta Reader, would anyone like to be mine
rry:rry: No. Never. That would mean someone had to read this trash.
Seamus: Screw more plot, how about *a* plot?
Snape: Somehow I doubt this counts as a cliffhanger. That would suggest we want to know what happens next and that there was some form of suspense. Which there wasn’t.
Draco: Please tell me it’s over? Please?

[It is indeed over and they all troop out with no sign of Ron anywhere.]


*Meanwhile, in Voldemort’s lair*

Ron’s sitting at a table with Wormtail, eating a bowl of ice cream and by all appearances having a grand time. Voldemort walks in and hands Ron a bottle of chocolate syrup.

“Thanks mate.” Ron said, pouring the syrupy goodness on his ice cream.

“You’re welcome Mr. Weasley.”

“Umm, Master?” Wormtail said hesitantly. “I know this is your plan and everything, but this doesn’t seem like a horrible punishment.”

Red eyes bored into him harshly. “Shut up! Just because I’m evil doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be a good host.” Wormtail shrank back, mouth pressed into a thin line. Ron snickered. “Now, Mr. Weasley, for trying to leave early you will answer my mail. Understand?”

“Uh…sure.” Four pieces of paper fell in front of Ron. He read quickly. “This one is from Randi. Let’s see…yes, the bad fic was really bad. Horrible. I’m forever scarred. *Shudders* And no matter how bad you may think your story is, I bet it isn’t half as bad as that was. I’m glad you found the commentary amusing. And I hope to god there is nothing worse then this.”

“Very nice Mr. Weasley. Next.”

“This is from Ivy. I agree totally, there was no point to adding Ginny to that carnage. Also glad you enjoyed our comments. And something with the Ferret and Bat would be amusing, just to watch them squirm.”

“And Kiara. Are you sure you weren’t tearing up over the horror that was that story? I’d understand completely.” Ron picked up the last one and blinked. “And Charlotte…who enjoyed it I guess. Thanks.”


Meh…that’s it for today. Will Ron make it back to his friends or will he escape Voldemort’s clutches, could anything possibly be worse then that first story, and would Draco *really* rather sleep with Ron? ^-^

Next Time on Mystery Hogwarts Theater!