Unnatural

\"The Headmaster wants to see you, Potter,\" Snape said. Harry was standing outside the Great Hall with Ron and Dean talking Quidditch. They both looked a bit surprised, but Harry shrugged and followed Snape.

\"Professor McGonagall is busy with the first years,\" said Snape, as they walked through the empty corridors. Harry had been wondering where she was; as his head of house it would normally be she who would come and fetch him.

They stopped outside the gargoyle, and Snape said, \"Acid drops.\" In the moment he took to step away Harry had the uncomfortable feeling that Snape had been looking at his bottom. He twitched his robe to cover it more securely.

The moving staircase deposited him just outside the Headmaster\'s door, and he knocked.

\"Come in, Harry. Please, sit down.\"

Harry did so, and noticed that Professor Dumbledore looked unusually serious. He was aware of a distinct sinking feeling. \"Thank you, sir.\"

\"First things first. Why did you leave the Dursleys?\"

Harry swallowed, \"I… I have confession to make, something I should have told you a long time ago.\"

\"I would prefer an answer to my question.\"

\"I know, sir. This is part of the answer.\"

\"Go on.\"

\"I\'ve never told anyone this, only one other person at Hogwarts knows and he guessed. Sir, I\'m a hermaphrodite.\" Harry had been staring at the carpet, but now he looked up. He\'d been expecting disgust, horror. What he saw was shock…but also understanding.

\"That explains a great deal,\" said Dumbledore. \"But I still don\'t see why you felt it necessary to disobey me.\"

\"Partly, I wanted to be alone,\" Harry said, realising it was true. \"But partly I…couldn\'t stay there knowing the Ministry would be watching. Sometimes…some of the magic I do is spontaneous. I can\'t help it, it just happens. Especially since…\" he stopped.

\"Since what?\" Dumbledore prompted.

\"Since I got pregnant.\"

\"I see.\"

Harry watched Dumbledore sit down, then lean back and stare at the ceiling. Harry said, \"Are you going to expel me? I\'d like to take my NEWTs despite this -\"

\"No! No, my boy. My child, I should say. There\'s no question of that.\" He sighed. \"I do wish you had told me about this sooner. I suppose you know that you are the rarest of all wizards?\"

\"Yes,\" Harry bit his lip.

\"And that with you Voldemort could rule the world?\"

\"Or you could use me to defeat him,\" Harry interrupted, though he didn\'t look up. \"Sometimes, I don\'t know which is worse. Is nothing what it seems? All I am, to anyone, is a tool to get what they want. The Dursleys only kept me for the money you sent them - I\'ve known about that since third year. Voldemort wants to kill me, or make use of me. You want to make use of me. The only person who seems to want me for myself is Sirius and I can\'t go to him because he\'s a wanted criminal and I never know where he is.\"

\"Harry. Harry, you are not just a tool. Not to anyone,\" said Dumbledore, \"except possibly Voldemort. You are loved, never doubt that.\"

Somehow, Harry didn\'t believe him. \"You left me with people who hated me and still do. Everywhere in the wizard world is tainted by hate for Voldemort. Until this summer I\'d never known what it was like to live without hate, or even guessed what it might be like.\"

\"I\'m sorry you feel I betrayed you.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing and there are a great many things I wish I\'d done differently. But Harry, had I
known what you are, there are things I would have done differently because I would have had to.\" Dumbledore smiled. \"Some of that we can put right - but I\'m not sure you\'ll appreciate all of it.\" He crossed to the fireplace and dropped a pinch of powder into the grate. At once there was a fire, and he called, \"Professor McGonagall?\"

A few seconds later she arrived, spinning very quickly in the fireplace. She stepped out and shook the soot and Floo powder off her robes, \"Professor Dumbledore?\"

\"Harry has given me some rather…surprising…news. Harry, may I tell her?\"

Harry nodded. He imagined Dumbledore would anyway when he was gone.

\"He\'s a hermaphrodite.\"

McGonagall sat down. \"Oh my… Why didn\'t you mention this before, Potter?\"

Harry didn\'t answer. Dumbledore went on, \"And he\'s pregnant.\"

\"That\'s only to be expected,\" said McGonagall. \"He\'s had entirely the wrong kind of training, and he\'s spent the last six years in a dormitory with four boys. Who was it, Harry?\"

Harry stared at her in total confusion. \"What?\" he said, after a long pause.

\"The father of your child. Who is it? You\'ve nothing to be afraid of, it wasn\'t your fault.\"

Harry had a sudden vision of Snape getting the sack. \"It wasn\'t any of the boys in my dormitory,\" he said. \"Beyond that, I\'m not prepared to say.\"

\"Why not?\" Dumbledore\'s voice was kind but firm.

\"I don\'t want to ruin his life.\" There would have been some satisfaction in getting revenge but Harry knew he would feel petty and spiteful.

\"I don\'t think you understand -\" began McGonagall.

She was interrupted. \"If Harry doesn\'t want to tell us he doesn\'t have to,\" said Dumbledore. \"Now, Minerva, could ask the house elves to prepare a suitable room for him? Thank you.\"

She stood up and left through the placplace.

\"Now, Harry. There are a few things you should understand. You are, as I said, a very powerful wizard.\"

\"Yes,\" said Harry. Somehow that should have been good news, but it really wasn\'t. Fawkes the phoenix flew down and stood on the arm of Harry\'s chair. After a moment, it hopped onto his lap and put its head on his stomach. Rather surprised, Harry sat back. The phoenix closed its eyes, apparently in bliss.

\"You will find as your pregnancy progresses that your control over your power is somewhat…erratic. As you did when you were a baby you will reflect all spells, but particularly attacks, back on the caster - I am sure now that I understand what happened to Voldemort. The spell he cast increased in power when it was reflected back, and rather than simply killing Voldemort you annihilated him.\" Dumbledore smiled whimsically. \"As you\'re pregnant, this effect is projected around you for about twenty five feet. As I\'m sure you will realise, this makes you something of a liability in a classroom. I will arrange for you to have individual tuition in every subject which involves spell casting.\"

\"But that\'s…\"

\"Every subject except Astronomy, History of Magic, Care of Magical Creatures and Divination. I\'m sorry, Harry. You will see a good deal more of your teachers than you will of your friends this year.\" Dumbledore sighed, \"Did you notice anything about your studies last year?\"

\"They were easier than they\'ve ever been, and I could do some spells without a wand.\"

\"You are beginning to come into your full power - that\'s normal for hermaphrodites, it seems to be connected to the process of growing up. If it helps, it seems to be similar in werewolves, I noticed it in Remus Lupin.\" He smiled. \"I\'m beginning to get thirsty, and I\'m sure you are.\" He tapped his wand on the desk and a tray of tea and sweets appeared. Dumbledore floated a cup across to Harry, who took it without disturbing Fawkes.

Dumbledore took a sip of his tea before going on, \"I need to talk to you about your…personal life.\"

\"He\'s dumped me,\" said Harry.

Fawkes spread out across him and put its head on Harry\'s shoulder.

\"Who has?\"

\"The man who… The father of my
baby.\"

Dumbledore thought for a moment, then said, \"Babies. Harry, you\'re having twins.\"

Harry had just put his cup down, which was the only thing that saved it. \"Twins!\"

\"Yes, indeed. A boy and a girl. That is interesting, not many hermaphrodites have ever carried girls. And twins are unusual, too.\"

\"Is that what you wanted to tell me? About my personal life?\"

\"No. No, it wasn\'t.\" Dumbledore took another sip of tea. \"I should warn you, this man whom you refuse to name…it was here at Hogwarts, wasn\'t it?\"

\"Yes. End of last term.\"

\"I thought so, I noticed you looked rather down in the mouth. This man…it is likely that he\'s the one you have chosen to commit to.\"

\"What? But I told you, he\'s…he doesn\'t want anything to do with me. Does that mean I can\'t find anyone else?\"

\"No…but it won\'t be easy. Are you quite sure? It may be worth talking to him - he realised what you were?\"

\"He could hardly miss it. Sex is…intimate, after all.\"

Dumbledore smiled, \"My dear child, of course it is. But it may still be worth talking to him.\"

\"I don\'t see the point.\" Belatedly Harry added, \"Sorry,\" when he remembered who he was talking to.

\"I merely meant that very often with hermaphrodites the first choice is the best one, the one which was meant to be.\"

\"You wouldn\'t think that if you knew who it was,\" Harry wished he\'d kept his mouth shut as Dumbledore gave him his most piercing gaze. \"Sorry,\" he said, again.

\"There is one other thing,\" said Dumbledore. \"And I must ask you to give me your word.\"

\"What?\"

\"You must not leave the school grounds.\"

\"Why?\"

\"For your children\'s sake and your own. This news…by its very nature news like this will not stay secret for long. I know you\'re using a concealing charm, but this is a school of witchcraft and wizardry. In addition, cin pin people will have to be told - before it gets into the newspapers. This is a very complicated situation, far more than you know. I\'d rather not add to that complexity.\"

\"Very well, you have my word. Besides,\" added Harry, \"when everyone does find out they\'ll just think I\'m being punished for allowing myself to get pregnant.\"

Dumbledore smiled at him, and his eyes twinkled, \"Yes, the Muggle born students will probably think that, at least to begin with.\"


\"Harry! Where have you been, mate?\" Ron called out to him from the Gryffindor table.

Harry helped himself to breakfast and joined him. \"I\'ve… I\'ve been given a room on my own,\" he said.

\"Is it that being sick with You Know Who thing?\" asked Ron. \"Because if it is, we\'re all used to it now. Or as used to it as you can ever get with something like that.\"

\"It\'s not that,\" Harry started to eat, wondering how long he\'d keep it down now Ron had reminded him. \"I…\" He paused to cut up a piece of bacon. \"There\'s something I need to tell you and Hermione.\"

\"Go on,\" said Ron.

\"I can\'t talk about it here. It\'s a…a private thing.\"

\"Oh.\"

\"Do you know the portrait of the woman in the blue crinoline with the fat dog on the fourth floor corridor?\"

\"Near the Muggle Studies classroom?\"

\"That\'s the one,\" said Harry. \"Meet me there, both of you.\"

\"When?\" asked Hermione. She reached into her bag for her timetable. \"We\'re free between three and four.\"

Harry took his out. \"I\'m not.\"

She looked across, \"Yours is different.\"

\"I\'ve got half of the lessons on my own.
\"
\"Lucky you, how did you manage that?\"

\"It\'s part of the same thing.\" Harry didn\'t think it was lucky at all. \"How about after five?\"

\"It\'ll have to be,\" said Hermione. \"I can\'t see any other spaces.\"

Harry looked at Hermione\'s hand, currently holding her timetable, \"Since when have you taken to wearing jewellery?\"

\"We\'ve got some news, too.\" Hermione blushed.

He smiled at her, \"I think I can guess. Congratulations.\"

\"Thanks…Harry I think Snape wants to talk to you. What have you done
to piss him off so soon?\"

\"Nothing…at least…\"

\"I was only joking. Even you couldn\'t have annoyed himt qut quickly. But he is looking at you as if he wants a word.\"

\"He can wait,\" said Harry. Forever, he thought.


It was a dark day outside, and the dungeon looked even darker than usual. Snape\'s eyes glittered from across the room and Harry almost didn\'t go in.

\"We\'ll be covering potions relating to changes of shape,\" said Snape.

Harry put his bag down on the bench. \"I thought you wanted to talk to me,\" he said. \"That\'s what you said when you nearly hammered my door down.\"

\"I do. We can do that when we\'ve got started on the actual reason we\'re here. Turn to page twenty-five in the text.\"

Harry stared at him.

\"Get on with it, Potter. We haven\'t got all day.\"

\"Just seems like it,\" muttered Harry under his breath. He opened the book as Snape gave him his most poisonous look. \"You want me to make this?\" Harry asked.

\"No, I want you to tap dance on the desk. Of course I want you to make it.\" There was a pause. \"Now would be a good time.\"

Harry fetched the ingredients, measured them out and put his cauldron on to boil. He started to grind lacewings in a mortar. \"What did you want to say to me?\" he asked.

\"What we did…what I did to you…was a mistake.\"

\"Go on.\" Harry put down the pestle in case he was tempted to use it as a weapon.

\"It should never have happened. But as it did, I need to know what you expect of me.\"

\"I don\'t expect anything of you,\" said Harry. \"You\'ve made it very clear you don\'t want anything to do with me; I assume that extends to my children. I\'ve accepted that,\" Harry wasn\'t sure this was true but he said it anyway, \"and I\'m prepared to bring them up alone.\"

Snape stared at him. \"You\'re mad,\" he said. \"Apart from any other consideration you\'ve completely forgotten Voldemort.\"

Harry banged the jar containing koala bear spleen on the desk and saw Snape wince. \"What about him?\"

\"He is going to guess. For a start there\'s the problem that you\'re not attending your normal lessons. Malfoy is bound to have noticed already and be sniffing around for the reason. There\'s probably an owl winging its way to his father even as we speak.\" Snape\'s voice softened slightly. \"Children are a… They can be exploited, as Voldemort exploited you to get to your parents.\"

\"What do you mean?\"

\"Without you they could have run. With you they were tied down.\"

Harry was so angry he could hardly breathe. \"That\'s a low blow even for you.\"

Snape came round the desk and stood beside him. \"I have to make it clear what you\'re risking in doing this alone,\" Snape said.

Harry couldn\'t suppress the tingle that having Snape near caused him, but it didn\'t cloud his mind. \"What do you mean? Do you want me or don\'t you? Or do you want me to get rid of them?\"

\"No! No, I don\'t want that. And even if I did… That\'s not the point at all.\"

\"So what is the point?\"

\"You know I work for Professor Dumbledore not just here but also as a spy among the Death Eaters?\"

\"I\'d guessed.\"

\"An affair… I could hide a relationship with you if you were a boy. And if Voldemort found out he would probably find it more amusing than anything else. But you\'re not a boy; you\'re an important - pivotal - magical object. If Malfoy gets to Voldemort with this news before I do Voldemort will kill me. And I don\'t mean kill me the way Ron does, I mean I\'ll be really very dead. If it were just a question of my life it wouldn\'t matter. But we don\'t have another spy.\"

\"You\'d tell Voldemort about me? You\'d do that to someone who\'s having your children?\"

\"I don\'t want to. But I may have to.\"

\"And if Voldemort finds me he\'ll kill me. When he\'s used me for whatever it is he wants me for.\" No wonder,

thought Harry, that Dumbledore doesn\'t want me to leave the school grounds.

\"Kill you? I doubt it, not once he knows what you are.\"

\"Ah,\" said Harry, drily. \"The fate worse than death.\" He looked down at the forgotten potion. \"I have always wondered exactly what that is.\"


\"Harry!\" Ron looked round the room. \"How did you get this?\" Hermione didn\'t say anything, but she too looked astonished. \"Great furniture,\" Ron threw himself on one of the two sofas, and put his feet up.

\"Where do you sleep?\" Hermione had been looking round.

\"Through here.\" Harry led them into the bedroom. This was dominated by a large four-poster bed with gold curtains. \"Gaudy, isn\'t it?\"

\"Yeah,\" said Ron. His gaze took in the pale carpet and cream bed linen. \"Don\'t get your dirty Quidditch robes over it or you\'ll be forever getting the mud out.\"

\"Where do you…\" started Hermione.

\"There\'s a bathroom,\" said Harry. \"It\'s through there.\"

She opened the door and looked inside. \"Not as big as the prefects\' bathroom,\" she said.

\"But pretty big,\" said Ron. \"D\'you think they\'d give me a room of my own if I asked?\"

\"I don\'t think so,\" said Hermione. \"Harry, what\'s this all for?\"

\"Let\'s sit down and I\'ll try and explain.\" He waited until they were all back in the sitting room. He took a deep breath. \"Hermione…what do you know about…um…hermaphrodites?\"

Hermione looked thoughtful. \"That depends on what you mean. In legend, Hermaphrodite was the child of Hermes and Aphrodite who had an unfortunate encounter with a mortal woman. In the Muggle medical world it\'s a term used to describe varying degrees of indeterminate or mixed gender from a variety of causes including genetic disorder and chromosomal damage. In the wizard world a hermaphrodite truly has both male and female sexual organs and is both a powerful wizard and a powerful magical object. The last British hermaphrodite died in 1683 and his name was…it\'ll come back to me…Mayness…no, Maynell.\"

\"Hermione,\" said Harry. \"Do you know everything?\"

She laughed. \"Of course not. Not yet, anyway. Harry, are you a hermaphrodite? Is that what this is about?\"

He swallowed, \"Yes.\"

\"Oh,\" said Hermione.

\"Wicked!\" said Ron. \"No wonder they gave you a room of your own. My Mum is going to be so thrilled.\"

Harry stared at him in astonishment. \"Why?\" he asked. \"Why should your Mum care?\"

\"You don\'t know?\"

\"No.\"

\"It\'s…I dt qut quite know how to explain it, but hermaphrodites are like wizard royalty. They help create wizard communities and wizard society is slowly breaking up because there hasn\'t been one for such a long time…since…that bloke Hermione said.\"

\"Maynell,\" supplied Hermione.

\"You should have told us,\" said Ron. \"Why didn\'t you?\"

\"I was ashamed.\"

\"What of?\"

\"Being different, I suppose.\"

\"When did you find out?\" Hermione asked.

\"Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia always said I was a freak, but I mustn\'t tell anyone. So I…I didn\'t. But when I started to…\" he glanced at Ron, \"have periods, I couldn\'t avoid thinking about it any more.\"

Hermione\'s eyes grew round, \"You have periods?\"

Harry nodded, miserably.

\"What do you do?\" said Hermione. \"I mean you cope, obviously. You haven\'t gone all Carrie on us, but then no-one tipped a bucket of blood all over you…\" Harry and Ron stared at her in honest puzzlement. She went on, \"But you sleep in a boys\' dormitory.\"

\"I take Impediere Infans.\"

\"Ouch. That\'s powerful stuff. It\'ll stop the bleeding stone dead but really it\'s not safe to take for very long…Ron?\"

Ron was looking bewildered, \"Too much information!\" he said. \"I have enough trouble with boy parts, I don\'t think I could cope with girl parts as well.\"

\"I didn\'t hear you complaining about girl parts last night,\" said Hermione. Ron went scarlet. \"But really, Harry, there are charms you can use instead that are a lot less messy,\" she went on.

\"There are?\"

\"I\'ll teach them to you -\"

\"Not right now!\" said Ron. \"I don\'t think that\'s a man thing…\"

\"There\'souplouple of other things I
need to tell you,\" said Harry before an argument could start. He saw the sudden fire in Hermione\'s eyes and recognised it from the S.P.E.W. days.

\"There\'s more?\" said Ron.

\"Um…yes.\"

\"Go on.\"

\"Well…mostly I like boys…men. Rather than women. To sleep with, that is.\"

\"So?\" said Ron. \"I mean it\'s not my glass of butterbeer, but you\'re not asking me to sleep with you. You\'re not, are you?\"

Harry laughed. \"No, I\'m not.\"

\"You don\'t need to make it sound as if you wouldn\'t touch him with a bargepole,\" said Hermione. \"Even if he is my boyfriend.\"

\"Besides,\" said Ron. \"Humans marry werewolves and things all the time. There was even that madwoman who married a centaur.\"

\"I\'ve never met anyone who\'s gay,\" Hermione looked thoughtful.

\"Harry\'s not gay,\" said Ron. \"Gay means liking people of the same gender and either everyone\'s the same gender as Harry or no-one is.\"

\"But…\" said Hermione.

\"Er…still here,\" said Harry.

\"Besides,\" Ron forged on, \"you\'ve met plenty of gay people. You just didn\'t know.\"

\"Such as?\" said Hermione.

\"Professor Lup" su" supplied Ron, after a moment.

\"Professor Lupin\'s gay?\" Hermione looked disbelieving.

\"Yeah. He\'s married to Sirius. Isn\'t he, Harry.\" Ron appealed to Harry for confirmation.

\"Neither of them have ever mentioned it to me,\" said Harry.

\"I expect they thought you knew,\" said Ron. \"That\'s why Snape laid it on so thick with the, \'Black was an old friend of yours, Lupin,\' stuff. I asked my Mum about it when I got home and she said everyone felt really sorry for Lupin when Sirius got sent to Azkaban but he just disappeared. Until he turned up here as a teacher Mum thought he was dead.\"

\"What\'s the other thing?\" Hermione turned back to Harry, after a pause.

Another deep breath. \"This is the really hard part,\" he said. \"I\'m pregnant.\"

Hermione looked aghast. \"How?\" she said.

\"The usual, how else?\"

\"No, I mean you said you took Impediere Infans. That\'s a contraceptive and nothing to fool around with. What went wrong?\"

\"I don\'t know,\" said Harry.

\"You don\'t look pregnant,\" said Ron.

\"Since June,\" said Harry. He took the concealing charm off.

\"Still don\'t look pregnant,\" said Ron. \"Are you sure?\"

\"Morning sickness is pretty fierce,\" said Harry. \"Yes, I\'m sure.\"

Hermione\'s brows creased, \"June…that was when you had that bad bout of pain and sickness with You Know Who. And Impediere Infans is a potion. Had you just taken it?\"

\"The day before. Well, that night.\"

\"Thought so. You brought the potion up so it wasn\'t fully effective. You didn\'t know that so you wouldn\'t think to tell him. Who was it? No, sorry, that was rude of me. I take it back.\"

\"It\'s all right, I\'ve got to tell someone. Do you think it could have been that? I\'d wondered if I made the potion wrong, but I think he\'d have noticed. But if he\'d wanted me to get pregnant he might have let me make a mistake and not said anything…\"

\"Harry?\" Ron sat up straight. \"Are you saying you\'re having Snape\'s baby?\"

\"Yes,\" said Harry, in a very small voice. \"Babies, actually. They\'re twins.\"

\"Harry!\" yelled Ron. \"You slept with that greasy git?\"

\"He\'s a teacher!\" shrieked Hermione at the same moment. \"Didn\'t you think?\"

Harry stared at the pattern of the carpet; he was mentally picking out all the red flowers. Still in that small voice he said, \"I just wanted to be loved.\"

\"And we had each other,\" said Hermione. \"Oh, Harry.\"

\"And he didn\'t… I wanted him and he seemed to want me and not many people have and he didn\'t think I was ugly or disgusting -\"

\"You\'re not going to cry are you?\" said Ron. \"Only, I\'m crap when people cry.\"

\"Yeah,\" said Hermione. \"You tend to sleep with them.\"

Ron looked at her, \"I didn\'t hear you

complaining.\"

\"That\'s because I\'d got a great lump of a Weasley on top of me and not much breath left over for complaining about it.\"


Harry smiled at them. It was rather weak, but it was a smile.

\"Shouldn\'t we be going to dinner?\" said Ron.

Hermione jumped up, \"We\'ll be late! Come on!\" She turned and hugged Harry, hard. \"Whatever happens, yes?\"

\"Whatever happens,\" said Harry.

Ron grabbed his shoulder. \"Whatever happens,\" he said.

\"Whatever happens, Ron.\"


The door slammed open and Harry turned in his seat. \"You got my letter, then?\" It was all he could think of to say.

\"And the one from Albus. And the one from Minerva.\" Sirius came further into Harry\'s room and shut the door. \"Why didn\'t you tell me?\"

\"I… It never seemed to be the right moment.\" Harry was getting to know that carpet extremely well. \"We\'ve never had much time together and anyway, I thought you might know but not want to mention it.\"

\"I had no idea. I have no idea why James and Lily didn\'t tell me. Or anyone.\" Siriuowleowled the room in what Harry felt to be a thoroughly unnerving way. \"Who was it?\" asked Sirius, when they finally came face to face.

\"None of your business,\" said Harry.

\"Ball… Rubbish. I\'m your godfather and your guardian. Of course it\'s my business.\"

\"It would ruin his life,\" said Harry.

\"It will, if I\'ve anything to do with it. I\'m going to tear the bast… swine limb from limb.\"

Harry winced, but he said, \"You can swear. I haven\'t suddenly turned into a shrinking violet.\"

\"No I can\'t. Not now. It would be like swearing in front of the Queen.\"

Harry stared at Sirius, and then closed his mouth. \"What do you mean?\"

Sirius gave him an irritated look. \"They haven\'t told you much, have they? I suppose they were waiting for me. Well, they\'ll carry on waiting.\"

\"Professor Dumbledore said something about it all being very complicated,\" said Harry.

\"That\'s one way of putting it. People like you, they are… I don\'t know if I can explain this veryl… Al… A sort of an icon of what it means to be a wizard, of what it means to hold that kind of power. I know as the Boy Who Lived you\'ve always been told you must set an example. That\'ll get fifty times worse when this gets out. And it will.\"

\"I suppose I\'ll be criticised for my lack of morals,\" said Harry.

\"That\'ll be the least of it. Especially if the bast… swine who got you pregnant doesn\'t step forward. And if he does they assume he did it for the influence.\"

Harry sighed. \"So he\'s damned if he does and damned if he doesn\'t.\"

Sirius turned on his heel and went to stand next to the fire. \"Yes. So, who is it?\"

\"I\'m not telling you.\"

\"I am not leaving until you do.\"

\"You\'d better ask Professor Dumbledore for a room, then. Because I\'m not saying.\"

There was a long silence while Sirius prowled around the room, picking things up and putting them down again. Finally, he said, \"Can I sit down?\"

\"It\'s a free country,\" said Harry. He was thinking, free for everyone except me, apparently.

Another long, tense silence, then Sirius said, \"Albus told me that you said this man… That you said he\'d - dumped - you.\" His voice was much softer. \"Did he say why?\"

Harry thought for a moment, then said, \"I… I told him I loved him.\"

\"And do you?\"

\"Yes.\" Harry\'s attention was back on the carpet with the red flowers. It occurred to him that after this he\'d never be able to live with red flowers on carpet as long as he lived.

\"Has he said anything since?\"

\"Some stuff about Voldemort. Nothing about… About us.\" Too late, Harry realised what he\'d implied.

Sirius uncurled from the sofa. \"Snape,\" he said. \"He raped you.\"

\"No! No, he didn\'t.\"

\"You\'re not telling me you wanted it!\"

\"I can\'t tell you anything,\" Harry shouted back. \"You don\'t want to listen!\"

\"I really am going to tear that…shit… man to pieces. I should have made

sure Remus killed him, the dirty, lying…\" Sirius strode to the door and flung it open.

It slammed behind him and Harry sat down. \"Oh…shit,\" he said.


Harry pulled the invisibility cloak from his trunk and followed Sirius down to the dungeon. It was a good thing that everyone else was in class because Sirius was obviously far too angry to consider transforming. Sirius stopped outside the dungeon; Harry watched him, Sirius\' face glimmering in the half-light, only relieved that he was not quite angry enough to storm in with a class in progress.

He could hear Snape\'s voice and shivered, despite himself; that voice was one of the things he found most attractive about Snape, and even now it was hard to let it go. Sirius didn\'t seem impressed, though. He was watching the class intently, a look of disgust on his face.

Harry heard Snape\'s familiar wind-up phrases at last; he slipped through the open door and moved to a corner. He noticed Neville looked relieved to go, even more so than usual, and wondered what had happened.

Sirius came in, and stood just inside the door, arms folded. Snape didn\'t turn, but Harry knew by the subtle stiffening of his spine that he\'d noticed. \"Black,\" Snape said, still with his back to the door and Sirius. \"I should have known.\"

Sirius slammed the door closed with his foot, and Harry winced. He said, \"You seduced Harry and then dropped him like a hot coal. If he\'d been a boy it would still have been a shitty thing to do, but-\"

Snape interrupted him, \"Is that what Harry told you?\"

\"He didn\'t have to. I know you too well.\"

Not well enough, thought Harry, if you think he seduced me.

Snape said, \"What did he tell you?\"

\"That you got him pregnant.\"

You jumped to that conclusion, thought H. I. Interrupting them would be criminally stupid, something he fully recognised, but the temptation was almost killing him.

Finally, Snape turned around. Harry saw that he looked even paler than usual, white to the lips. He said, \"Am I denying it?\"

\"No,\" said Sirius. \"But you\'re not exactly admitting it, either.\"

\"I shouldn\'t imagine Harry would be thrilled to have the information become public knowledge.\"

\"I should tear you apart,\" said Sirius.

Harry stepped away from the wall, just in case.

\"Please do,\" said Snape. \"I\'m sure Albus will be really thrilled with his golden boy when you show him the bits.\"

Sirius looked at Snape for a long moment, then he said, \"What I don\'t understand is, why you? You\'re a shit, and not even a very attractive one.\"

\"Then we have something in common,\" replied Snape.

\"I really don\'t get it. Why would he choose you? What did you do to make him go along with it? Use one of your potions to soften him up? It would be just like you, you pervert.\" Snape sil silent, and Harry watched Sirius take a step closer. Sirius said, \"You don\'t want to admit it, do you?\"

\"Believe what you like, Black,\" said Snape. He held his ground. \"You seem to have all the answers.\"

\"You know what he told me?\" said Sirius. \"He said he \'didn\'t want to ruin your life\'. As if having him in it could do anything but improve your miserable excuse for a life.\"

Snape said nothing, merely looked at Sirius with one eyebrow raised.

\"Why have you done this to him? Was it that you couldn\'t stand to see anything that perfect and you had to ruin it? Like pissing in the snow?\"

Harry closed his mouth abruptly. Him? Perfect? What was Sirius on? He saw Snape look away.

\"My poor Harry,\" said Sirius. \"You\'ve thrown him aside-\"

\"Like a soiled glove?\" said Snape. \"Really, Black. Could you get more melodramatic if you tried? He will have to endure some criticism for having children so young, but he\'s strong and the wizard world will be so pleased to have him that it will all blow over quite quickly. But can you imagine everyone waking up to find my face in the Daily Prophet every morning? No, neither can I. Besides,

Voldemort would think all his birthdays had come at once.\"

Harry felt his jaw drop again. What on earth was Snape on about?

\"You\'re a shit,\" Sirius repeated.


\"I know,\" said Snape. \"The door\'s behind you.\"

\"Why did he choose you?\"

\"He was lonely. The door, Black.\"

Sirius left.

He closed the door behind him, and the room was completely silent. Harry didn\'t dare move; he knew Snape had excellent hearing. He watched Snape prowl back to his desk and sit down. He looked, somehow, more alone than Harry had ever seen him.

At that moment, Harry\'s nose started to tickle. He put his hand to it and pinched, holding on desperately. There was a knock at the door and Snape said, \"In!\"

Harry had never been more relieved to see anyone than he was that first year. He didn\'t even know her name. He slipped out and was able to sneeze in peace.


\"Did you sleep all right?\" Ron asked.

\"Yes…why wouldn\'t I?\" said Harry. He put down his breakfast and looked about for the salt.

\"You Know Who\'s been busy, and I just wondered.\" Ron pushed the Daily Prophet over to Harry. \"Look.\"

Harry stared at the headline, \'Dark Mark seen over Croydon\' and the twinkling picture of the Dark Mark, almost as bright as the Asda sign. \"I know that place!\" said Harry. He read down the article swiftly. Three Muggles dead - their names were not given - and a witch, Arabella Figg. He felt sick.

\"You didn\'t feel anything?\" said Ron.

\"Not a twinge.\" Harry didn\'t know whether to be relieved or not. He should be, but the pain connected him to Voldemort\'s other victims, and he half regretted the loss.

Hermione arrived with a pile of books under her arm. She dropped them on the table with a loud bang, and went to fetch some toast.

\"Isn\'t Madam Pince suspicious?\" asked Harry, when she got back. \"This is the fourth lot.\"

\"She hasn\'t said anything. You know Madam Pince, she never says much no matter what you take out. And it\'s not as bad as it would be if it was you borrowing them.\"

He supposed she was right, if Harry Potter started taking books out of the library about having babies she\'d think him insane. And Hermione reading them saved him the trouble of doing it himself.


After breakfast he had another of his appointments with Madam Pomfrey. It wasn\'t pleasant; Harry had been brought up to hide his body, and exposing it seemed somehow…wrong. Even more wrong now that he was beginning to look a bit fat; he reminded himself of Dudley. He wondered how big he\'d get.

\"You\'re doing well,\" she said. \"Has the sickness passed off?\"

\"It\'s getting better.\" Harry climbed off the bed, and pulled his trousers on.

Madam Pomfrey put her quill down. \"You know, I can\'t understand why I never noticed before.\"

\"What?\" Harry retied his tie, and reached for his pullover.

\"After all the times you were in here, you\'d think I\'d have seen that you of all the students were a hermaphrodite. I can\'t think how I missed it, I seem to have undressed you at least twice a ysincsince you came to the school.\"

\"I suppose so.\" That aspect had never crossed Harry\'s mind. It did seem odd.

\"And why your parents never told anyone-\"

\"They didn\'t. Nobody I know of, anyway. Not even Professor Dumbledore.\" Harry sighed. Even Sirius swore he hadn\'t known, but he couldn\'t tell Madam Pomfrey that.

\"I suppose we\'ll never find out why, now.\"

\"I don\'t expect so.\" Harry pulled on his robe and turned to go.

\"Next month,\" she said. \"Don\'t forget.\"


From his position at the teachers\' table Snape watched Harry Potter eat. Even in this, when teenagers were at their most disgusting, he was beautiful. The extraordinary economy of movement, the lines of his face, a look beyond androgyny into something unique.

Snape swallowed the last morsel of dessert, and stole another glance as Potter stood. And now there was the soft swelling of his belly - the concealment charm Potter used hid

his condition only from those who did not know. He wondered if Potter realised, but supposed he must do.

Those children would never be his; strangely perhaps he felt that as
their father he should have some rights. In theory of course he did, but the theory only applied where the parents were married, or engaged. Or at the very least when the man was acknowledged. Curse Potter\'s nobility anyway. He could have taken this out of Snape\'s hands by telling Dumbledore rather than letting the old man guess - for Snape was sure he had guessed.

Nothing had been said, of course. Even Dumbledore could hardly avoid sacking a teacher who got a hermaphrodite pregnant - not unless the hermaphrodite said otherwise, and there was little chance of Potter doing that. Snape had made sure of it.


\"How are the team doing?\" Harry forced himself to ask, and to sound cheerful when he did so.

\"Oh, all right,\" said Ron. \"You should come and watch a practise some time, we…\" He\'d opened the door to the Great Hall but stopped when silence fell. \"Oops,\" he said, very quietly.

Harry really wanted to turn round, go back to his room and never come out again. Instead he collected his breakfast and sat down at the Gryffindor table as usual.

Very slowly, conversation started up again, around the Hall. Harry didn\'t feel like eating, but he spread butter and jam on his toast and took a bite. He wasn\'t - just wasn\'t - going to run. He noticed Ron looked rather worried and smiled, he hoped convincingly.

Dean Thomas said, \"Are you really…\" then stopped.

Harry put his toast down. Dean passed the Daily Prophet across the table. Harry was sure breakfast was something else he was beginning to get a complex about. The headline read, \'Harry Potter pregnant\' in a type almost bigger than the front page. Harry removed the concealment charm - there was no point to it now - and Dean\'s eyes grew big as saucers.

\"Wow!\" said Dean. \"When is it…?\"

\"Around Easter,\" said Harry. \"What does the article say?\"

\"You\'re not going to read it?\"

\"Not if I can help it.\"

\"It quotes \'sources\' in the Ministry,\" said Hermione, who had been sitting nearby. \"No-one at the school has said a word that I can tell, there\'s not even a \'no comment\'. But I bet I know who it\'ll be. Malfoy.\"

\"And we\'ve got History of Magic this morning,\" said Ron.


In the event it wasn\'t as bad as Harry had feared - though it was considerably stranger. Harry left his room a little later than he\'d intended, he could see Hermione and Ron already waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs.

\"Would you like me to carry your bag?\" asked Malfoy. He\'d - apparently - been outside Harry\'s room.

\"I can manage,\" said Harry, rather taken aback both by the offer and the fact that Malfoy seemed perfectly serious. \"Thank you,\" he added, belatedly.

\"You\'ll tell me if there\'s anything I can do for you?\" Malfoy followed Harry down the stairs.

Harry tried to imagine a situation in which he might want anything from Draco Malfoy and failed. The silence stretched beyond the polite and Malfoy blushed. Even more astonished, if that were possible, Harry reached the bottom of the stairs and handed his bag to Ron, who took it without a word.

They arrived at the History of Magic classroom to find the rest of the Slytherins in a knot, whispering. Harry and Ron exchanged glances; this usually meant they were plotting something. But on seeing Harry they all gave a sort of half-bow. Nobody spoke.

\"What was all that about?\" whispered Harry to Ron as they sat down.

\"They\'re proving what good manners they\'ve got compared with the rest of us scum,\" said Ron.

\"Eh?\" Harry pulled his book and parchment out of his bag. \"You mean they\'re going to do that all the time
\
\"Probably. Everyone else is supposed to,\" said Ron. \"But I\'d feel silly.\"

\"You\'d look pretty silly, too,\" said Harry. \"You must meet me twenty times a day. They meet me twenty times a day. I don\'t get why-\"

At that moment Professor Binns appeared through the blackboard, unrolled his parchment and began to read. He\'d moved away from goblin rebellions some time in their fifth
year and was now giving an outline of the history of wizard specific legislation and of the Ministry of Magic. Unfortunately while this was important, it was also even more boring than the goblin rebellions, which at least had deaths to brighten them up.

His attention not held by the lesson, Harry looked around. Ron had his eyes closed, no doubt resting them for the day ahead; Hermione was making her usual copious notes, which he and Ron would copy later and Draco Malfoy was watching him. Not with his usual malice, though Crabbe and Goyle both looked as curious as it was possible for lumps of wood to look, but with a kind of speculation. Malfoy smiled at him and Harry looked away. He wondered what Malfoy was planning.


Professor McGonagall greeted Harry with a nod as he arrived for his lesson. She closed her book and stood up, dislodging her copy of the Daily Prophet. \"Yes, well,\" she said. \"We were lucky to keep it a secret this long.\"

\"Professor?\" Harry asked. \"Do you know how they found out?\"

\"Unfortunately not. I can make an informed guess, but…\"haraharacteristically, she trailed off. \"If anyone is rude to you about it, Potter, you must tell me.\"

\"I can manage.\" He saw her face. \"Really.\"

\"That\'s not the point.\"

\"Actually…\" Harry wasn\'t sure how to put this. \"Even the Slytherins haven\'t said a word. It\'s a bit odd, I expected them to take the piss.\" Too late he realised which phrase he\'d used.

She ignored it. \"It\'s not them I\'m worried about,\" she said. \"It\'s the Muggle-borns who may not understand.\"

\"I don\'t understand, either,\" said Harry. \"So I can\'t really blame them.\"

\"You\'ve read Meynell\'s book?\" she said, rather sharply.

\"Yes, but it\'s in weirdo-speak.\"

\"I suppose he is a little elliptical. He had reason enough to be.\"

Harry looked at her curiously.

\"You know Britain is a monarchy?\"

\"Of course.\" Really, thought Harry. What sort of idiot did McGonagall take him for?

\"In the eyes of wizards you rank equal to the Queen. In the eyes of some wizards, you rank higher than the Queen.\"

Harry swallowed. So that\'s what Meynell had been getting at. He said, \"Does that mean they put my face on the coins?\"

\"Yes,\" she said without missing a beat. \"It does.\"

Harry sat down. He\'d meant the question facetiously. \"What else?\" he asked.

\"All wizard-specific legislation has to be approved by you, as well as by the Minister for Magic.\"

\"Anything else?\" He\'d best know it all.

\"The Ministry has to provide somewhere for you to live and pay for you to live there. The Minister will be contacting you about that in due course.\"

\"I don\'t…work?\"

\"Oh, you\'ll work. Just att at any normal job. Between taking part in enchantments, attending garden parties, making speeches and greeting VIPs you\'ll be very busy.\" She sat down and put her arm around him. She\'d never done that before and he was rather surprised. \"It\'s not the life you wanted for yourself,\" she said. \"And if we\'d known about you when you first came to Hogwarts you\'d have had suitable training in what\'s expected of you-\"

\"And I wouldn\'t have ended up like this,\" he indicated his stomach.

\"No, you wouldn\'t.\"

Harry stole a glance. He was used to thinking of McGonagall as a hard disciplinarian; he sometimes forgot the other things she\'d done for him.


About the last person he expected to see in Professor Dumbledore\'s office was Ron\'s mum. \"Auntie Molly?\" he said. He\'d been promoted to brevet-nephew a couple of years ago and it still gave him a warm feeling.

\"Oh, Harry!\" Molly enfolded him in a tight hug.

\"How was Divination?\" said Professor Dumbledore when Molly had released him. His eyes twinkled as they so often did.

\"Professor Trelawney\'s very pleased,\" said Harry. \"She hadn\'t

foreseen this - though she\'s not admitting it - but there\'s a whole new way for me to die nastily.\"

\"Harry!\" Molly looked horrified.

\"Oh, don\'t worry, Auntie Molly.
Madam Pomfrey says it\'s very unlikely to happen - if I get the proper care.\"

\"I know but even so…are you sure you should be here? All this walking around and carrying heavy bags of books, it can\'t be good for you.\"

\"I don\'t carry much,\" said Harry. \"Ron and Hermione mostly do that. I don\'t think it\'s necessary, but they insist.\"

\"I still don\'t think-\"

\"Auntie Molly, I need my education.\"

\"What for?\"

\"I don\'t want to be different.\"

Molly looked thoughtful. Then she said, \"But Harry, different is you you are. You can\'t change that.\"

Harry looked away. \"I know,\" he said. \"But I don\'t want to be different in any way I don\'t need to be.\"

\"Of course you don\'t,\" she hugged him again. \"Now, how did this happen?\"

Harry grinned, he couldn\'t help it. \"You\'ve got seven children, Auntie Molly. You must know how it happens.\" He blushed. \"Sorry. That was rude.\"

\"Apology accepted. Now, was it Ron?\"

\"No! Ron\'s engaged to Hermione.\"

A curious expression crossed her face, but she said, \"Good, I brought Ron up to be a gentleman, but one can never be completely sure…\"

Harry didn\'t think much for Ron\'s chances if his mum found out exactly what \'being engaged to Hermione\' entailed. Certainly, he wasn\'t about to tell her.

Dumbledore intervened, \"Molly, Harry has maintained his silence on that subject from the start. I think he is entitled to continue to do Sha Shall we have tea?\"

Harry was more grateful than he dared say.


\"What are those?\" Ron asked.

\"Invitations to spend Christmas,\" said Harry. \"Four so far.\"

\"Five,\" said Ron, dropping a letter on the desk. \"Not sure if I should even bother you with it, but mum said you\'d be very welcome to spend Christmas with us.\"

Harry smiled, \"Are you sure? Is there room?\"

\"You\'re to have Percy\'s room. He\'s gone to the States to try to improve our relationship with wizards over there. Fred and George say they expect war to break out any day.\"

Harry giggled. \"How\'s the shop doing?\"

\"I\'ll let you hear it from them, no point boring you with it twice. Who are the invitations from?\"

\"It\'s strange, there\'s never been people queuing up for my company before. So far we have Mr and Mrs Fudge--\"

\"Wow! The Minister himself.\"

\"I bet that would have been a barrel of laughs,\" said Harry, ironically. \"And here we have Mr and Mrs Malfoy,\" Harry waved a letter on particularly stiff and crackly parchment, \"and Draco.\"

\"Urrgh! You\'d have to be mad.\"

\"That\'s what I thought. Then there\'s this one, five spelling mistakes in seven lines from Mr Crabbe.\"

\"Double urrgh!\"

\"And finally one from a Madam Polkar. I\'ve never even heard of her.\"

\"Neither have I. So, are you coming?\"

\"Yes, of course. It\'s very kind of your mother to ask me.\"


It was a bit strange to be at The Burrow and not be sharing a room with Ron. In all the visits he\'d made Harry had never before been in Percy\'s room. He wasn\'t sure if it reflected Percy\'s personality or if it had been tidied up for him. Possibly a bit of both. Percy\'s Quidditch team seemed to be the Lancaster Lancers - well, it would be, they were half way down the second division, maintaining their position by the skin of their teeth.

Harry got up to go downstairs and Hedwig blinked at him from the perch Hermes would normally use. She\'d worked hard taking the refusals back and Harry opened a pack of owl treats. She took one delicately.

Halfway through dinner, Harry startled himself and everyone else with a sudden, \"Ouch!\"

The only person who didn\'t look worried was Molly. \"Are they awake, dear?\"

\"And kicking,\" he said. He was a touch ashamed at having made everyone jump like that.

\"They\'ll go back to sleep soon,\" she said. \"My lot did that to me.\"

Ron, Ginny, Fred and George all looked a bit ashamed. Ron was also a bit pinker than normal, but then he was easily embarrassed.

Other than his children occasionally
making their presence felt, he had a wonderfully quiet and peaceful Christmas. Just as well, he thought, since it was the last he\'d ever have on his own. Next year he\'d have children. He looked down as he got into bed on the last night of the holidays. He was already very swollen, every taunting word he\'d ever said to Dudley came back to haunt him. But of course his was for a different reason. He sighed and lay back, trying to get comfortable.

There was a knock at the door and Harry sat up again. \"Who is it?\"

\"Me.\" Ron came in. Even his freckles looked embarrassed. \"Thought I\'d better tell you,\" he said.

\"What?\"

\"I think mum\'s guessed.\"

\"Guessed what?\"

\"About Snape.\"

\"Oh, no.\" Harry lay back down.

Ron sat on the bed. \"I\'m really sorry,\" he said. \"I didn\'t mean to tell her, but you know what she can be like.\"

An evil smile crossed Harry\'s face. \"I do,\" he said. \"But Snape doesn\'t, does he? He hardly knows your mother.\"

**