Taking Matters

After dinner Hermione and Severus settled into their respective chairs and read. Hermione opened up one of the books she had picked up earlier that day titled "Matrimonial Matters of the Bedroom." She finished it in about an hour and started another book; this new one was called "The Science of Seduction." The books began to pile up beside her as she studied each one quickly and committed their contents to memory.
Considering the nature of the books, the tone was informal and easy to read. It surprised Hermione that she was able to finish all but one of her books before bedtime.
"Interesting subject?" Severus asked, eyeing the pile of books beside her chair.
"Informative, but none of these would earn any literary awards. The grammar is dreadful," Hermione sighed and reached into the basket for the remaining book.
"Far be it from me to criticize you," Snape purred. "However, if you wish to comprehend anything tomorrow you might want to retire."
Hermione eyed him as he rose from the chair and glided across the room. He had a point. It was late, and she had a number of things to do in preparation for the wedding.
"That is a little hypocritical, dear one. I know you will be up marking papers late into the night."
"I do have to do the curfew patrol. That does cut into my marking time."
"Something you volunteer for."
"Yes I do." There was an evil gleam in his eye.
"You are a terror." Hermione stood up, "You shouldn't be lecturing me on my sleeping habits, Mr. Pot." She closed the gap between them and leaned forward. "Now kiss your wife goodnight before you go off to give those poor children nightmares."
Severus obliged his mousy wife and placed his long fingers along the base of her throat. He dipped his head towards her face and hovered just in front of her eyes. "A goodnight kiss to keep the nightmares at bay." He traced the corner of her mouth with the pad of his thumb.
Hermione opened her mouth instinctively, and, like a viper striking, he darted forward and claimed her.

He forced his lips to hers and stole her breath away. His kiss was swift and sure, removing Hermione's awareness of everything. She was only aware of their close bodily contact. The pressure between them was firm and deliberate, giving Severus total control of the situation. When Hermione tried to pull him closer and deepen the kiss, Severus broke off.
He stepped away from his wife and grabbed his teaching robe.
"Don't read the night away," he said and disappeared.

Hermione regained her composure and walked to the bathroom. As she brushed and flossed her teeth, her thoughts turned to the past.

Severus had been her tutor for most of Hermione's years at Hogwarts. He had terrorized and humiliated her and her friends. Then life had changed. Hermione was taken to Grimmauld Place where she and Severus started to speak together as equals. She often assisted him in making Wolfsbane for Lupin and also worked on other concoctions. In those days she had been an impressionable schoolgirl and he was a mysterious man who had once walked on the dark side of life.
Soon the working relationship turned into an uneasy friendship, and when Hermione had surpassed Severus' own benchmark NEWT results, Severus took her out for a butter beer to celebrate.

That was when the rumours started, that the moody potions master was seeing the genius Muggle born witch.
So few people were happy in those days that Hermione was glad they had something positive to talk about. Even though Severus was upset by the implication, Hermione had convinced him not to say anything.

"We know the difference, and that is what matters," she had said as she chopped some ingredients. "We know the truth, and if the lies make people focus on something other than their pain, what is the harm?"
"I will not be mocked!" Severus growled. "My life is not going to be the subject of wagging tongues and brainless prattle."


Hermione dow down her knife and walked over to him. "No one is mocking you. Have you actually heard the rumours?" She put one of her hands on top of his. "They are saying things like "˜Thank Merlin he has found some happiness.' That is not mocking."
"I won't be pitied either." Severus did not remove his hand from under hers.
"It isn't pity. It is concern. They care about you. We all do." Severus looked at her for a moment, watching her eyes as if he was searching for the truth. Then he pulled away.
"I won't say anything to confirm or deny the fishwives' tales."

Hermione smiled at the memories and rinsed out her mouth. Severus was a difficult man to talk to and since that day she found that touching him when she needed to make a point was more helpful than just talking to him.

She heard a gentle tapping at the portrait that connected their rooms to the Slytherin common room. Hermione was still dressed in her jeans and jumper so she walked into the sitting room and nodded to the portrait.
It swung open and behind it stood a pale first year, eyes wide.

"Yes Kunhild," Hermione watched the boy walk slowly into the sitting room. "It is late, child. You should be in bed."


As head of Slytherin, Severus needed to be available to the children of his house. He was a surrogate parent to them, and was expected to provide guidance and support. Hermione had watched him console homesick children as well as chastise. As his wife, she had inherited the role of den mother.
"Umm Mrs. Snape," Kunhild stammered. "I can't sleep."
"Sit down and tell me what is bothering you." Hermione sat down on the end of an uncomfortable leather sofa.
"It's those Gryffindors," The little boy said with a sudden passion. "I want to hex the blo... erm"¦ them. They were calling me names and then insulted Professor Snape."
Hermione nodded and thought for a few minute. House rivalry was still fierce between Slytherin and Gryffindor. The desire to best the other house dominated almost everything that the houses did.
No longer a student, Hermione could laugh at some of the goings on, but she still remembered the depth of feelings between the houses. Now though, as Slytherin den mother, she was expected to nurture the qualities prized in its students. She had to suppress her typically Gryffindor bravado and let her devious and cunning side take over.

"Kunhild, though these students may indeed require a hexing, it isn't what you should do." She looked him in the eye and gave a knowing wink. "That is something a Gryffindor would resort to. It is blatant and crass. It is something I might have done." Everyone knew Hermione had graduated from Gryffindor, along with her other famous classmates. The students quickly learnt that Hermione was not going let herself be categorized by her association to her former house. Any student who believed her to be inferior was quickly put in their place.
"No, hexing isn't the thing at all. I suggest that you calm down and relax. Their childish words only show how bumbling Gryffindor are. They have made drawn attention to themselves and now you will be watching out for them." She stood up and started to walk around the sofa.
"However, we can not have them insulting a professor and highly regarded member of staff. No." Kunhild watched her as she moved around him; his eyes are bright with excitement. "Are these class mates the same ones who have been bothering you all year?" the boy nodded.
"Well then I had better keep a closer eye on them and if they slip again an example should be made. Leave it to me Kunhild. I will see you in the great hall at breakfast tomorrow." The boy smiled and walked back through the portrait, happy in the knowledge that he would get his revenge without losing house points.

"That boy is lying, you know. They didn't call Severus anything. They were just insulting the boy," the portrait said as it closed behind him.
"You are as bad as the Fat Lady," Hermione laughed. "Gossiping like that, I know what those children are up to and I have heard their prattle from BOTH parties. They seem to insult both myself and Severus on a regular basis, and it is high time they learned some respect," she said.

"You never did," Severus' voice called from the door. He stood leaning on the doorframe with his inky eyes staring at her. "A wife should respect her husband, and a woman should listen to her elders."
"No one in the halls tonight Professor?"
"Just a Gryffindor first year hoping to catch someone out of bed. He caught me and lost 25 points."
"Umm," she knew that the Gryffindor had been the topic of her discussion with Kunhild, the two boys acting out a dance that had happened many, many times before in Hogwarts. "Those two are as bad as Draco and Harry, but at least they will be the best of friends."
"Indeed," Severus pushed his lank hair away from his eyes. " I will have to go out again, but I thought it best to check on you."
"Check on me?" Hermione was suddenly defensive. He was implying that she was not trustworthy enough to be left alone. "What am I? A foolish third year who can't be trusted to go to bed?"
"Cease your prattle woman! I saw the type of books you were reading so avidly tonight. I know what you are up to!"
"And what is that?" she started to yell, but the portrait behind her cleared its throat. Hermione lowered her voice to a vicious hiss. "What do you assume I am up to, Professor Snape?"
Severus' voice was quiet and ominously calm: "You are looking to have an extra marital affair. You are trying to make a fool out of me."

Hermione resisted the urge to roll her eyes and laugh. It was not the best idea to laugh when Severus. His temper was cold and deadly, she knew very well, and it was not wise to provoke him. "I am not looking for an extra marital affair, Severus. I am looking foraritarital affair. But this topic will be discussed when you have finished your hall duty. I will be waiting." She turned and walked away, knowing he would obey her and leave, which he did, and heavens help any students caught after curfew.

*******
It was well past midnight by the time Hermione's greasy husband returned. Severus' quiet rage was barely contained in his dark eyes.

Hermione was seated in her reading chair, making notes on a parchment. She was aware of Severus' presence in the room but ignored him until he stopped stalking about the room and stood in front of her.

"Quit trying to intimidate me Severus. I'm not a student anymore," she said not looking up from her paper. "There is a cup of tea beside your chair. Sit down, and we'll talk about this."
"What is this, pray tell."
"Us, our lack of," Hermione paused and chewed her bottom lip. "excitement."
"I have lived through enough excitement to sate any man."
Hermione decided to change tactics. "Do you like kissing me?"
"Hermione," his face was calm, but she could see in the little details that she had thrown him off balance.
"I asked a simple question. Do you like kissing me?" she sat forward; time to go in for the kill, flattery would help her get her point across. "I ask, because I love kissing you. Your lips and tongue steal my breath away. In fact the reason I moved in with you was because of your kisses." She stopped to take a breath and look into his eyes. "But, Severus, I think we are missing something."


"What is that?" Severus sat back, his face still calm.
"Good sex." She sighed and continued. "I have been happy with what we had until I was pressured by the girls. When"¦"
"The girls?" Severus interrupted. "You were talking to the girls about our private life?" he hissed, his mask of control slipping.
"No I wasn't, that was the problem. They were taunting me because I was upset with their lewd comments. Ginny said something that shocked me and I didn't like it. Then the twins started in on me." Hermione closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It was terrible, and embarrassing. I changed the topic, but Ginny brought it up today at lunch."
"Hermione, I will be mocked by no one. Not even my wife."
"Are you listening to a word I've said? I haven't mocked you. I defended you. It is me who has been made the butt of their jokes. Not you. ME!" She stood up. "Their jokes hurt, their comments were rude, and I blamed the excess of alcohol. But they did make me think." Hermione closed the gap between them. "Severus, you kiss like a god. But I think we need to work on the rest. That is why I got the books. Because I know most of this probably stems from my lack of knowledge." She knelt by his feet and put her head on his knees.
"I worry you won't find me desirable and may stray. I worry that life is too comfortable like this and you will get bored." She sighed as his hands tangled into her hair, massaging her scalp tenderly helping her to relax. "I want this marriage to work."
"Now this is interesting," he said, still rubbing her head.
"The know-it-all Gryffindor admits she doesn't know something."
"Be that as it may, I now have enough theory to start building one."
"Yes I am sure "˜Titillating Tantra' is full of theory."
Hermione snorted. "Well it was a better read than "˜Rampages and Romantic Scenarios'. Severus do you like kissing me?" She turned her head and looked up into his eyes.
Severus offered her one of his rare smiles. "Very much so."
"Then we have something to build on."
"Get off me woman." He snapped, the tender moment gone. "I have papers to grade."
"Let go of my hair you overgrown bat and I will be able to!"
Yes, Hermione had embraced her inner Slytherin.
****

A/N: Thank you for all your reviews, they have been great. I hope that soon this will spiral into the side splitting hilarity that Corazon wanted and I planed, but those silly characters who want to be believable and still in Cannon really ruin things for me. *sigh* I am a slave to Cannon
Anyhow the requirements for this challenge were as follows:
Requirements:

Severus:

- hair is greasy - it can't be silky shinny or limp from the

humidity in the dungeons

- long, hooked nose - very distinguishable

- socially reclusive, so little to no experience with sex other than

constant masturbation

- is not hung like a horse

- cro ana anatomy (optional) *snigger*

- hairy (optional)



Hermione:

- long, bushy hair, (on both ends)

- bossy

- book worm, so she "knows" all about sex, but has little to no

experience

- is convinced how sex should be done and proceeds to instruct Severus

- can't have a Barbie Doll figure, but can have a part of her anatomy

more pronounced than the rest of her body

Possible Scenarios:

- Severus and Hermione's first date
- Severus and Hermione's first experience being intimate

- Severus and Hermione talking about sex

- Severus and Hermione experimenting with their so called sex life

Optional Quotes:

- Wrong hole!

- Is it in yet?

- Don't fake it this time, okay?

- If you would stop staring at me, it would get bigger.

- If you keep playing with it, it will get hard.

- Have you considered shaving or at least trimming?

- Even a Weasley would be more appealing right about now.

- Albus told you to try what?