I, Snape

Snape’s Mother

It all belongs to Rowling, except what you don’t recognize.

It was busy in The Three Broomsticks with everyone still celebrating over a week after the defeat of He-Who-Must-Not-But-Might-Now-Be-Named-If-You-Were-Feeling-Brave. Hermione sat sipping her butterbeer, quite bored by the Quidditch talk of her two friends. Now that the war was over and the N.E.W.T.s almost behind them, Harry and Ron were feeling relaxed. After all, what were the N.E.W.T.s compared to facing down the Dark Lord and winning?

Hermione, on the other hand, had picked up an interesting snippet of conversation from the booth behind them. She kicked her two friends and signaled for them to be quiet. She had heard one of the two ladies behind them mention their potions professor, Severus Snape, and she wanted to hear more.

“As I said in my owl post, I am very concerned about my son.” Hermione determined that this indeed must be Mrs. Snape. Her voice was strong and seemed to have a Yorkshire accent. Hermione desperately wanted to look at her. Would she have a hooked nose and greasy hair like her son?

“Yes, I quite understand. Severus is a very complicated person.” Hermione couldn’t figure out to whom the second voice belonged. She craned her neck, but the wooden partition was too high.

“And, I’m sure you remember what happened the last time….” The voice she believed belonged to Snape’s mother lowered and sounded conspiratorial.

“Hmm. No, I don’t,” said the second voice. Hermione still couldn’t place it.

“Well,” continued Mrs. Snape dramatically, “he almost died.”

“Yes, well. I cast the I Ching, did a Tree of Life with the Desoto deck, leaves with Oolong Sapchong and a horoscope. Normally I would charge 50 Galleon—“

“Please-- money is no object!”

“However, considering that you went to school with my Aunt Pandora, I have significantly discounted the price.”

“Quite. Tell me, is my son in any danger?”

“Well, from the tea leaves and the Tarot, yes, however the I Ching and the Horoscope indicate major change. I suppose death could be considered a major change. However, I think it might have to do with his matrimonial prospects.”

“I knew it!!!” Mrs. Snape sounded triumphant. “You cannot know how much it pleases me to hear that. That is exactly what my son needs—a wife! He’s 38 and it’s high time he settle down.”

“Well, my Inner Eye tells me—“

Hermione’s eyes met with Ron’s and Harry’s. “Sibyll Trelawney” she mouthed.

Snape’s mother continued, “My son is very stubborn though. His father disowned him when the whole Death Eaters thing came out 16 years ago, and then last year after his father’s death I wrote Severus asking him to come to the departure ceremony. He didn’t write back. I doubt if he will ever forgive me for staying with his father.” A note of sadness crept into her voice.

“Ron,” said Hermione in a whisper, “you want another butterbeer.”

“No, thanks Hermione,” answered Ron, “I’m fine.”

“No,” hissed Hermione, “I need a look at his mother, so I want an excuse to go over to the bar.”

Harry gulped the remainder of his beer. “Here you go, Hermione, but I still don’t know why you care to see her.”

“I’ll explain later,” she whispered to him. And she got up and headed over to Madam Rosmerta. She couldn’t hear the conversation too well over the noisy students, but she got a good look at the two women. Mrs. Snape looked rather regal. She seemed quite young with long raven black tresses and an aquiline, yet attractive nose. Her eyes reminded her of Snape’s because of their intensity, but hers were a deep, dark blue. She was thin but had a good figure and wore an azure blue witches robe with matching hat. Hermione would have never taken her for Snape’s mother. Nor would she ever have recognized Trelawney. Where were her glasses, and the weird gauzy clothing with all the jewelry? Trelawney looked like an average, even attractive, witch! Obviously, she had come in disguise.

As Hermione came back to the table she witnessed Trelawney removing a large scroll of parchment. She sat down and listened to hecturcture.

“Here we go, all complete. Severus has his Sun in Pisces-- quite typical most Slytherins are water signs even if it is not the Sun sign, but in his case it is. Then his rising sign is Capricorn, although it is an Earth sign, belonging to Hufflepuff, it is ruled by Saturn and explains his attraction to the Dark Arts and his Slytherin style ambition. Now his moon sign is Virgo. Again, a Hufflepuff element, but in this case demonstrating an ability to be very loyal and steady, however, the sign of the Virgin shows a certain reserve and inability to be open with his emotions.

“Now the part you were interested in: he has Leo on his house of marriage and indeed within the next few weeks there are many conjunctions and trines to this house. In spite of the Hufflepuffian rising and moon signs, I’d say his mate is someone who has graduated Gryffindor. And there is a major trine to Aquarius, which is actually an air sign, not water, and represents the dreamer and intellectual. Even though a Gryffindor, there will be an unusual amount of intelligence in his mate. She might even have been in Ravenclaw.

“My conclusion is that it will most likely be a Gryffindor that he will marry with an outside possibility of a Ravenclaw. Don’t bother with either Slytherin or Hufflepuff, it wouldn’t happen.

“And who fits those descriptions?” asked his mother.

“On the staff?” queried Trelawney.

“Of course. I’m assuming since from what I’ve heard he stays at Hogwarts like a winkle in it shell that it would be one of the staff. In addition, you know he’s been given five years probation under Albus’ custody.

Trelawney blushed. “Well, everyone on the staff knows about Hooch. She was Gryffindor, but she threw him out of her chambers last night. Filius, oh that’s Professor Flitwick who teaches Charms, said only this morning that they had had an affair 15 years ago.”

“So it’s not her?”

“Only if she changes her mind. It’s that Hufflepuff quality he has, he tends to be very loyal.”

“Who else?”

“Professor McGonagall is house mistress of Gryffindor.” Trelawney was blushing even more furiously, “I was Ravenclaw, but my Sun is in Scorpio, with Moon, Venus and Mars in Aquarius. Also, Pisces is on my house of marriage. I have to admit, should I ever wish a mundane, earthly relationship, culminating in marriage, your son would be a good candidate for me.”

Here’s e’s eyes almost popped from her head. “Did you hear that? She’s going to try and snare him.”

“Well, good riddance to bad rubbish. Trelawney and Snape, now there’s a couple.” Ron sniggered.

Hermione batted at Ron, “Please, this is serious. We need to help him out. Harry?”

“I think they are perfect together,” Harry said mulishly. “I’d be glad to help them get it on. It’s a much better idea than that Severus Snape Appreciation Day thingy of yours.” Harry had eventually come to stop blaming Snape for Black’s death, but that still didn’t make Snape his favorite person.

“He saved my life! Doesn’t that count for something?” hissed an outraged Hermione.

Both Harry and Ron were in agreement that it had been more a fluke than an actual rescue. Unfortunately, Hermione refused to see the situation in any other light than Snape being a bona fide war hero.

“Hmmm,” said Mrs. Snape. “I wonder who he will choose.”

“Perhaps no one. Remember there’s that moon in Virgo. He’s quite the loner. And the Pisces Sun creates an abundance and duality of feelings. He’d have much to overcome to actually win a bride.”

“Still,” said Mrs. Snape eyes gleaming, “I think with a little push, my son might find himself very happily wed. Sibyll, can I trust you to be my eyes and ears? Severus still refuses to return my owls.”

Trelawney thought for a moment about how Snape, being an intensely private man, would hate his mother’s prying nature and solicitations. Trelawney also thought about Snape as a potential lover. He was rude, insulting, and arrogant. He was everything that she hated in a mate. And yet, whenever she sat next to him at the High Table she became incredibly aroused. He had magnetism of which he was completely unaware. It was just too bad that his combination of planets made him such an unsocial creature. She wondered for a moment how he’d be in bed. He had some rather impressive planets in Scorpio, in spite of an ill-aspected Venus. Trelawney felt a small shock run up and down her body. He might be worth shagging before she left on her vacation.

“I’d love to Mrs. Snape, but I can only stay a few days after the semester ends. I’ve made plans.”

“Please call me Althea,” Mrs. Snape beamed at a potential future daughter-in-law. “Well, I should be going. Albus asked me to have tea with him. I’m sure he will have further information for me!”

Althea got up and rtedrted The Three Broomsticks, leaving her untouched sherry behind. After a minute, Trelawney downed Mrs. Snape’s sherry and left as well.

Hermione turned to her friends with a fierce, determined look. “We have to stop her! She’s all wrong for Snape.”

“Well, how are we going to do that?” Harry asked with some pique. “They are consenting adults, you know.”

“We’ll find someone else for him.” Hermione’s eyes became bright and shiny.

“Crikey, Hermione. You go too far,” said a very dismayed Ron. “By the way, did you know that your Sun was in Virgo?”

Hermione looked at Ron with annoyance. “You two don’t care about me. If you did, you’d want to help out. After all Snape—“

“Saved your life,” the two young men said in unison while rolling their eyes.

“Well, getting Snape laid is probably a damned sight better than doing a Snape Appreciation Day. I mean the only one who was willing to go along with that stupid plan was Dobby,” said Harry realizing it probably was the lesser of two evils.

“It’s not just getting him laid. He needs to have a woman to make him happy. You see the way he is, all broody and depressed. He needs new goals, a new love. He needs…”

“To get shagged,” stated Ron, wishing that Hermione were that determined to help his love life.

“Listen Hermione,” Harry tried to keep his voice even and reasonable, “he’s an adult not some orphaned kitten you want to adopt. Here’s the deal, we set him up with someone. If it works fine, if not, too bad. We have less than two weeks before we graduate. There simply isn’t the time to do more.”

Hermione’s shoulders slumped. It was hard to fly with the eagles when stuck with the turkeys. “Agreed, we set him up and let nature take its course. But it won’t be with Trelawney.”

&&&

Albus Dumbledore pulled out a chair for Althea Snape. She looked around her with interest as she sat down. “Puddifoot’s Tea shop. Oh this does take me back, Albus.”

“Althea, I cannot say what a pleasure it is to see you again,” said Dumbledore as he nibbled a digestive bisquit.

“Thank you for seeing me. I really need to put my mind at ease; how is my son?” She poured tea for herself and the elderly wizard.

“Well, thanks to the resourcefulness and determination of a certain young student of ours, he only spent 72 hours in Azkaban, before being released to me. The first two days back he refused to come out of his chambers. On the third day, I managed to convince him to come out to eat at the Great Hall. He didn’t look up or converse with anyone, but that it so close to his normal behavior that it was like having his old self back again.” Albus smiled and nodded his head.

“So, you don’t think, it will happen again?” Althea said with some nervousness.

“Althea, you worry too much. He’ll be safe with us at Hogwarts; we’ve always taken good care of him.”

Althea looked at Dumbledore with relief and gratitude. Dumbledore’s eyes took on an extra special twinkle as he took her hand. “You know, now that you are a widow, perhaps it is time to think about yourself for a change.” He took her palm and kissed it. “You are still very young and attractive. It is common knowledge that your husband was less than the ideal.” He continued to fondle her hand.

Althea blushed. It actually made her look even younger. “It was the marriage from hell. I can only hope to pick up the pieces of my life and start over. Hopefully with my son back.”

“You are very young. You could even start a new family.” Dumbledore’s normally clear eyes clouded. “Severus is a grown man and you need to let go and look to your own future.” He stroked her hand sensually. “I’d like to help you, if you’d let me.”

Althea felt her heart begin to pound. She leaned forward and brushed her lips against Albus’ cheek before whispering into his ear, “I think I’d like tha
A
A/N: Many thanks to Rilla, Kiri, Amethyst, Lady Aidil, Elizabeth, Piper S., ShagstheDustMop, Jean, and Em.