Life After Graduation

Life continued to go on as normal, except it seemed like Lily and James were spending much more time in the bedroom, though James was not complaining in the least. They had decided to tell his parents they had decided to try for a baby, and Lily was sure James’ mother was going to faint with excitement.

“Finally!” James mother exclaimed holding her husband’s hand. “I thought this day would never come, we’re not getting any younger you know!” She replied as a broad smile spread across her deeply wrinkled face. Her life had become a series of roller coasters with her husband, son, and daughter-in-law fighting in the war, and it was taking a toll on her body.

James gave Lily a sideways glance, grinning before looking back at his mother again, “I suspect you are going to be over every day to see your grandkid huh?” He asked sounding disappointed, joking of course.

“Of course! And there is no need for a baby sitter, I can do that. Save you guys some money, and I get to spend time with him, or her.”

Lily was sure that if she could, her mother-in-law would steal their kid and raise it as her own. It hurt her a bit to think about her parents, and how they would never get to meet their grandchild, but she knew they would be watching over him.

Jackson wrapped an arm around his wife to calm her down a bit, “now Matilda, you don’t know when Lily is going to get pregnant don’t get ahead of yourself,” he teased, though he was just as excited.

“You can never be too prepared,” Matilda shot back before peeling herself out of his arms. Without another word to them, she slipped up the stairs mumbling to herself about a crib.

“You just made her day you realize,” Jackson said laughing as he looked up the steps to where his wife had disappeared. He then turned around, and grabbed at his chest lightly, then played it off as if he was adjusting his shirt.

James of course had caught that and raised an eyebrow as he pushed his glasses up, “you feeling alright Dad?” He asked looking at him.

“Fine fine,” his father replied with a smile. “Bit of indigestion is all,” he then adjusted to pull out his wand and lowered the temperature in the room a bit, he was hot and beginning to sweat.

James just nodded and looked at Lily. He could tell she was bit apprehensive as well, but she just shrugged lightly before looking at the stairs where a large white crib was floating down. “Mom, we have a while until that comes,” Lily said though she couldn’t help but smile.

“I just wanted to make sure it is still useable,” Matilda replied setting it in the corner of the room before walking over to it, wrapping her sweater around her shoulders a bit tighter. “Jackson did you turn the temperature down again?” She asked as she picked a bit at the peeling paint.

“Yeah, it’s a bit hot in here,” he replied looking at Lily out of the corner of his eye. Jackson knew that she had side training as a healer, and figured she would be all over him, overacting.

“Dad you really should…” Lily began.

“It’s nothing Lily,” Jackson replied his eyes boring into her for only a brief second. There was no need to scare his wife for a bit of indigestion. Lily had been on him about his health for a while now, since he was getting up there in age, but he felt fine.

Somewhere in the background a timer went off, and Matilda was quick on her tiny feet into the kitchen. “Dinner’s ready!” She called as plates began to clamor their way onto the table.

The group of three rose from their spots on the couch and joined Matilda in the kitchen for a rather extravagant dinner, like always. When they were done they all sat around the table for about an hour talking about anything they could think of. James’ parents were the easiest people to get along with, and there was never a dull moment.

James began to notice something odd after a little bit of chatting, his father who was normally loud and boisterous when they talked, was quiet, and fidgety. He kept glancing at him out of the corner of his eye before continuing talking. Then about thirty minutes later, there was a crash and James was quick to his feet.

“Dad? DAD! LILY!” James was knelt at his fathers’ side. He had fallen from his chair, and was holding his chest tightly and panting for breath. Matilda was at his side now shrieking, and starting to panic. “Dad open your eyes,” James said frantically looking over his shoulder at Lily.

Lily was next to Jackson, and began to look around the kitchen. If only they were home, there was nothing here for her to work with. “We need to go to St. Mungos, now.” Lily was trying to remain calm, since Matilda had already lost it, and was sobbing, and James was almost over the edge. She should have known with the first two signs he exhibited earlier. With a pop the four of them were gone and they landed in the bright lobby of St. Mungos.

“Sixty eight year old male, sweaty, indigestion, with signs of a heart attack,” Lily said as a healer came to their side quickly. The minute Lily said heart attack, Matilda nearly collapsed onto James for support, and James looked like he wasn’t do much better.

“We have to stay here,” Lily said when the healers shut the door to a room. There were loud noises coming from inside, and Lily stood looking into the small window, glad that they had made them wait outside.

James’ face was pale as he put an arm around his hysteric mother. This could not be happening; his father was fine just a few hours before he was too young to die. “He will be fine mum,” James said quietly.

That only consoled his mother for a second or two. Time seemed to be going by slowly, and Lily held her breath as a healer came over to the door, the look on his face grim. “Oh God,” Lily groaned to herself, and saw James look at her from the corner of her eye, but Matilda had not heard thankfully.

His heart sank when he hear Lily and saw her face. The door swung open slowly and the healer removed his gloves before closing the door behind him facing the small family.

“I have some bad news,” he said grimly looking at Matilda, whose face seemed to get whiter if possible. James held his mother’s hand tighter, and looked at Lily who was standing very still waiting for the news. She had been in this situation before, but it still hurt her tremendously.

“He has suffered a major heart attack, and, I’m afraid, he is not going to make it,” the man said looking at all of their eyes.

Matilda wailed loudly before her body fell limp against James. She did not pass out, but her eyes were distant, and it seemed she had given up. James rubbed his mothers shoulder as he looked at the healer, “how much time?”

“Not much longer,” the healer said quietly as he looked at Matilda. Gently James rose from the seat, and helped his mother into the room. Lily followed quietly behind, and it pained her to see her father –in-law like this.

He was hooked up to a few things, and his eyes were shut as he struggled to breathe. Lily took the opposite side of the bed from James and his mother and stared silently at them. Matilda was a hard sight to see as she held her husbands’ hand sobbing, and begging. James was quiet, though he was crying, and shaking slightly.

A machine was beeping softly in the background, and Lily looked at the signs on it, they were not good. Jackson was fading quickly, and she was surprised he was even holding on this long.

James adjusted slightly in his seat before grabbing his fathers’ hand, sine his mother had moved to lay gently on his chest. His eyes met Lily’s for a brief moment as he wiped away a few tears that were following down his cheeks. The machine then began to beep erratically, and both his and Lily’s eyes moved to Jackson’s face.

Matilda looked up at Lily, tears streaking down her face, “i-is he in pain?” She stuttered, her eyes fixed on her.

“No,” Lily said quietly before looking at Jackson as she did so. The machine beeped a few more times before going quiet. His breathing had stopped, and they all knew that he was gone. Lily knew that she should leave James and Matilda alone to mourn. Yes he was her father-in-law, but Lily was nowhere near as close to Jackson as James and Matilda were.

James watched Lily go, and he turned back to his father. Nothing had sunk in, it could not be true. He was a healthy man, never been severely sick, strong, and as active as ever. Their night had turned from complete joy at the thought of a child running around, to total sadness in a matter of hours. He began to cry, openly, and unashamed alongside of his mother.

Lily met the healer down the hall, and told him that Jackson was gone. She fought the tears that were welling up in her eyes. She needed to be strong for the three of them now, Lily would have her time to mourn later. There was no way she was going to let Matilda deal with the harsh reality of planning everything, and telling the rest of their family the bad news. Lily had been there, and knew just how hard it was.

She was busy signing a few papers when James walked out of the room, his eyes red, and a bit puffy. “Hey love,” Lily said gently as she pushed a piece of paper back to the secretary behind the rather large desk.

“Hey,” he said quietly taking a seat next to her into the large arm chair. James sniffed quietly as he stared at the wall, waiting for something else to happen. He had decided to leave his mother alone for a bit, so she could say her goodbyes.

“Not much longer,” Lily said quietly as she scribbled away at a rather large stack of papers shoved in her face. The woman healer behind the desk was a bit mechanic, with no personality, and Lily was glad that James did not have to deal with it, or his mother.

His mother appeared a few minutes later escorted by a healer. She was silent as she took a seat next to James, and Lily finished up the last bits of paperwork. Finally they were able to leave, and James decided to have them go back to his and Lily’s place.

When they were home, Lily gave her mother-in-law their bed, and she made up a bed in the spare bedroom, which was going to be the nursery at some point. She threw a couple of sheets onto her old mattress she had inherited from home, and waited for James to lay down. Once he was comfortable, Lily went back out to the main part of the house to pick up a bit, and have her own private moment to think about what had happened.

About thirty minutes later, Lily emerged in the spare bedroom again to see James laying on his back staring at the ceiling. She climbed into bed next to him after changing and curled up next to James throwing an arm around him.

“Hey love,” James said his voice hoarse and quiet. He felt almost numb at this point as he watched the fan spin above him to cool down the small room. “How’s mum?”

“Sleeping,” Lily said quietly. She had gone in to check on her a few moments before. The woman’s tiny body was curled up under the sheets asleep, though the pain on her face was still evident. “I covered her up as well, she was shivering a bit.”

James didn’t say anything. Instead he just removed his glasses, rolled on his side to face Lily, pulled her tightly against him and closed his eyes. This day was supposed to be happy; his parents would be able to look forward to having a child. Now it was just his mother. He sucked in a ragid breath before trying to sleep. It took him a long time to finally fall asleep.

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Lily laid awake most of the night, and was up bright and early the next day. Gently she untangled herself from James, and went to check on her mother-in-law, before getting down to business. She began to write letters to friends and family to alert them about the tragedy. The first person to respond was Sirius, though not by letter. He just showed up at the house.

“When?” Sirius asked Lily when she let him into the house.

“Last night, around dinner time,” she replied with a sigh before going back into the kitchen with him to continue writing, and figuring out arrangements. “There’s still some coffee in the pot,” Lily mumbled before handing her owl yet another letter. The bird seemed a bit annoyed and nipped at her before taking off once again chittering the whole way.

“Where’s James? And mom?” Sirius asked as he pulled up a chair handing Lily the coffee he had made her before taking a sip of his own. James’ parents were like his own, they had given him a roof over his head when he ran away from his own parents, and treated him just like a son.

“Both still sleeping. Mom’s in our room, James is in the spare bedroom,” Lily said before sitting back. She had finished the last batch of letter and just had to wait for her owl to get back

“How long have you been up?” Sirius asked her cocking an eyebrow. Lily had deep circles under her eyes, and she was deathly pale.

“Since about five thirty, I only got…” she paused when there was a soft knock on the back door. There stood Remus, a look of concern on his face. “About two hours of sleep.” Lily finished when she went over and opened the door. Before she could say anything Remus gave her a hug before moving over to Sirius doing the same and taking a seat.

“Peter’s on his way,” Remus said quietly thanking Lily for the coffee she got him.

“I’m already here,” a squeaky voice said as Peter walked in from the living room.

“I’m going to need to make more coffee,” Lily remarked getting up to go to the cabinet but was stopped by a pair of large, but gentle hands.

“Let me do it, go sit down,” Remus said moving around Lily to go make some coffee and breakfast. He knew his way around the Potter’s kitchen well enough to not need direction.

“Thank you,” Lily said quietly taking a seat.

The group sat in silence mostly, the only sounds came from the food Remus was cooking for everyone. At ten the door swung open slightly, and James was standing there, his hair disheveled, eyes red, looking generally dead. “Hey,” he mumbled willingly taking the mug of coffee from Remus.

James had been awake for a little while, and had hear Lily talking to someone, and figured the marauders were already there. He took a seat next to Lily and stared at his coffee for a few minutes for finally speaking, “where’s mum?” James asked taking a sip.

“Still sleeping,” Lily said gently.

James nodded and rose from his seat, slipping out of the kitchen, and to his and Lily’s bedroom where his mom was sleeping. When he walked in he wasn’t surprised to see her awake already. “Hey mum,” he said quietly taking a seat next to her on the bed.

“Hi James,” she said very quietly before sniffling. “It was weird to wake up and your father not be here this morning,” Matilda began before wiping away a tear. “I haven’t slept alone in a very long time.”

“I know,” James said quietly looking out the window behind the bed. It was a dreary day outside already, which just added to the sadness in the air. “The marauders are here. Remus made some coffee and breakfast. I can bring it in here for you if you want…” James said looking back at his mother. It was hard to keep eye contact with her, since the pain was so evident in her eyes.

“No, no, it’s fine. Just give me a few minutes to change,” she said looking at a pile of clean clothes on the dresser. It seemed someone had gone to get her clothes for her, and she figured it had been Lily.

James nodded before leaving the room and going back to the kitchen where Remus was serving breakfast. His mother appeared a few minutes later, and they chatted about anything that came to mind, trying not to think about what had brought them all together though it was very hard.

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Five days later was the wake and funeral, and James had been up most of the night pacing, and coming close to losing it. He crawled into bed around three in the morning, which woke Lily up, but she just soothed him to sleep. At eight the alarm clock went off angrily, but Lily turned it off and went to shower, which James was grateful for, it gave him an extra thirty minutes of sleep or so.

“Time to get up love,” Lily whispered into James’ ear before going to the closet and taking his suit out for him.

“Coming,” James groaned before rolling onto his back and rubbing his eyes. He saw Lily still wrapped in a towel, though her hair and makeup was already done. He walked over and gave her a small kiss before he retreated into the bathroom for a much needed shower and shave.

At nine thirty he was fully dressed, and met Lily as well as his mother (she had been staying with them in the spare room) in the living room. No one said a word, instead they apparated to the church. The wake was held in a side room, then at one the funeral was held in the main cathedral.

Lily sat quietly dabbing at her eyes throughout the ceremony, and smiled up at James when he went and gave a speech about his father with Sirius. He stumbled a few times, but kept his composure long enough to make it through.

They carried out the funeral the traditional muggle way, with Sirius and James’ cousins as pallbearers. The immediate family followed suit to the graveyard where Jackson was to be laid to rest. The sun had held out for most of the day, but ominous clouds were moving in.

“Are you alright?” Lily choked out to James as she looked up at him. His face was dark in the shadow from the weeping willow, but she could still see a few tears running down his cheeks. Lily looked away across the landscape, feeling a bit happy. Jackson had been buried at the top of a hill looking down on the beautiful landscape of England.

“Can I have a minute?” James asked Lily. She just nodded and walked off to stand with the dwindling number of family members. His mother had already left with her sister, and after a few moments it was just her standing on the main path waiting for James. To give him some privacy she turned around to watch the rain move in.

James sat by his fathers’ grave for a few moments before moving to kneel next to the headstone, and putting his hand on it. “I’m really going to miss you dad,” he began as he stared at the engraving on the stone. “It was too soon,” James forced out as a rain drop hit the granite stone making a small dark spot. “It’s not fair. You didn’t get to see the world peaceful once again, or mom finally relax, or…or” James stumbled resting his head on his arm for a second before picking it back up to continue, “meet your first grandchild.” James sniffed staring at the many drops that had appeared on the stone. He sat for a few more minutes glancing at Lily who was staring patiently the other way, her hair whipping around her.

“I promise I will bring them here to meet you dad,” James said before gently patting the headstone and standing up. He looked over his shoulder one more time before catching up with Lily, and apparating back to his parents', now mothers', place.