What the Devil Wants

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“What was that?” Harry sat up abruptly from bed. While he’d been pleasantly dozing not quite awake and not quite asleep, he’d still felt the whoosh of something zooming past him perilously close to his face.

“Breakfast.” Snape muttered just as whatever had flown past Harry’s head slammed into the wall and clattered and banged to the floor in a spray of food. Harry scrambled for his glasses on the bedside table before pulling himself out of bed to stare at Snape in confusion. “Seems the house elves remembered me from my last visit.” With a flippant wave of his hand Snape ignored the mess of the breakfast tray still sliding down the wall and continued to pack his trunk. “Well get a move on Potter, we’ve a lot to accomplish today.” Snape glared pointedly at Harry from over the lid of his trunk as he realized that the boy was still standing quietly beside his bed. “Muggle clothes today Potter, we’re going into London.” It was only then that Harry finally realized what was different about Snape. Unlike the dark, flowing robes the professor wore during school, Snape now stood up in, a pair of light brown trousers a fitted emerald green jumper and a matching camel colored coat. With his hair tied back neatly at the base of his neck, and his boots miraculously cleaned of potion stains the man looked practically muggle. If it hadn’t been for the slight view of the man’s wand sticking out from beneath the sleeve of his jumper Harry wouldn’t have spared him a second glance if they’d passed in the street. “Well Potter, stop gawking and get dressed!” Snape’s angry voice snapped Harry out of his stare, and with a slight flush of his cheeks the boy turned and ran into the bathroom across the hall to get washed and dressed.

It was still early morning by the time Harry and Snape stepped out through the front doors of the Leaky Cauldron and onto the quiet muggle street. To save Harry’s pockets Snape had shrunken the packages from the previous days excursion and placed them in his trunk, making it much more compact for carrying. Free of packages Harry was happy to stuff his hands into his pockets to warm them up as they passed through various streets, heading for the main shopping center. Snape seemed very familiar with the route and so Harry fell contentedly into step beside his potion master, having decided that trailing behind might give the muggles the impression he was Snape’s child not his student. Not that Harry knew why he was worried about the impression he gave, nor what others thought it was just a conscious decision to walk beside Snape.

Having rarely been allowed into London, Harry enjoyed taking in the sights that Snape cared to point out. In between ducking in and out of stores, Harry took his time to enjoy himself. The Dursley’s never took him with them when they went shopping, and neither was he allowed out on his own during school terms. It was a privilege, and not for the first time Harry wondered what Snape had said to Dumbledore to make him agree to the trip. Still that was not to be dwelled on, and by the time Big Ben rung 1 o’clock Harry was more than ready for lunch and a sit down. Snape chose a little café down the back streets, it’s quaint French windows, and café curtains and home cooked smell made it a perfect place to stop. Harry had been surprised that Snape had not asked him what he’d wanted from the menu and had instead ordered for him. It was a strange incident but Harry put it out of his mind as he bit into the beef burger and chips.

“What was that thing you did last night, I never sleep without dreaming.” Harry mumbled around a mouthful of his burger as he watched Snape spear another lettuce leaf with his fork.

“Memory adjustment.” Snape spoke calmly as if everyone should know what he was talking about. Harry nodded but decided against inquiring after the spell. One of Snape’s lectures about spells and learning wasn’t something he wished to suffer through lunch. There was a stale silence for a few moments longer before Harry put down his burger and grabbed for his cola.

“You don’t like it here do you?” Something had been bugging Harry all morning about Snape’s behavior while in London. The wizard certainly wasn’t at ease as he’d been in Knockturn Alley, and he certainly wasn’t as stiff and formal as he’d been in Diagon Alley. Something had changed the moment they’d stepped out of the Leaky Cauldron this morning, and Harry finally thought he had the answer. Snape looked up from his half eaten salad, his lips pursed together in mild distaste.

“No.” The answer was simple and certainly didn’t explain further Snape’s discomfort.

“Why?” Determined to find out the answer to Snape’s dislike of muggle London, Harry pressed for more information. Snape’s gaze darkened as he pushed away his salad obviously having had enough.

“Because unlike wizards Mr. Potter, with muggles it is impossibly hard to determine those that are genuine and those that wish you harm. I know my enemies in our world Mr. Potter, I do not know them here.” Snape finished with an irritated huff as he picked up his teacup and sipped its contents. Harry nodded quietly in agreement, although he thought Snape was a little paranoid. Still whatever event had caused Snape to have this view of muggles, there was no way Harry would ever find out what it was.

It was dusk by the time the pair of them stepped through the wall at central station and onto Platform 9 and ¾’s. Harry was glad not to have been apperating back to Hogwart’s. The whole action of apparition made him tired, and being already exhausted Harry didn’t know what damage he might have caused himself had he been forced to apperate under fatigue. With both their arms ladened with packages Snape and Harry easily found an unoccupied carriage in the train and got themselves settled. By the time the train pulled away from the station Harry was sitting with his feet up on the bench, and his head resting on his jumper against the window. It had begun to rain, and apart from the occasional flash of lights outside Harry could see nothing but darkness from the window. Snape was sitting in the opposite corner of the compartment his nose lost in one of the many books they’d picked up over the weekend. Harry stared a Snape unashamedly; as he ran through the conversation they’d had the night before. Everything Snape had said had made sense in a warped kind of way. Since his 12th birthday he’d learnt not to discount anything that happened to him, and this strange situation was just another in the many that had made up his life. Still there was one niggling part that Harry didn’t understand, and that was what hugely significant thing Snape had sacrificed for Lucius to warrant being given Draco in compensation. It was a puzzling aspect of the situation that Snape seemed unwilling to answer but Harry was determined to find out.

“Potter.” Harry snapped out of his stare as he heard Snape’s low growl from behind his book.

“Sorry.” Harry muttered knowing instinctively that it was his stare that was irritating Snape. There was silence again in the carriage, and Harry in an attempt to stop himself from staring, looking out at the rain drops running down the window. Idly Harry began tracing the droplets path down the window with his finger, amusing himself by trying to predict their paths on the icy cold glass. It was only after several minutes that Harry realized Snape hadn’t turned the pages of his book recently. Glancing away from his finger painting on the window, Harry was a little shocked to see Snape staring at him his book closed and forgotten in his lap. The elder wizard wore a strange expression on his face, one Harry couldn’t make out. Beginning to feel awkward under Snape’s silent gaze, Harry fidgeted in his seat avoiding eye contact. No sooner had Harry’s chin dropped to his chest, and his cheeks had flamed pink in embarrassment at being openly stared at than Snape moved.

Leaning forward, Snape reached out and with two long potion stained fingers tilted Harry’s chin back up forcing the boy to look at him.

“What is it you want Harry?” The question hung in the air, no explanation of it’s meaning forthcoming. Harry unconsciously licked his dry lips as he stared into Snape’s searching onyx eyes. Unable to look away Harry began to shake his head in confusion and that’s when he felt it. The familiar push and prod of someone entering his mind.

“STOP IT!” Harry wrenched his chin out from Snape’s gentle hold and threw himself along the bench away from Snape. “You know I can’t stop you!” Harry shouted suddenly angry as he shook his head trying to physically shake the man out of his mind despite the futility of the action. A twitch of a smirk tugged at the corners of Snape’s mouth as he pulled back from his searching, and sat back on the bench. Harry could still feel Snape in his mind casually flicking through his most recent thoughts just like he’d been perusing his book a moment before. Gritting his teeth Harry continued to try and employ some of the techniques he’d learnt during the few short occlumency lessons he’d had with Snape, but none of them were working.

“Come now Potter, I’m only intrigued by what has sparked this sudden interest in me? I’ve been reading your mind all weekend and you’ve not kicked you such a fuss as this.” Harry knew almost immediately what Snape had said was true, but like most things Harry had been oblivious to the intimate invasion of his privacy happening right under his nose. With a resigned sigh Harry slumped in the bench and closed his eyes. Almost immediately Harry felt Snape retreat from his mind, a strange action considering Harry had practically given him access to his mind unhindered. Confused by the action Harry opened his eyes and watched as Snape folded his arms across his chest and rumpled his nose in irritation. “A crush is one thing Mr. Potter, and perhaps you thought it excuse enough to explain your uncharacteristic willingness in the situation Draco has put you in but you forget I’m not that unobservant.” Snape paused and Harry swallowed nervously, trying to force down the thoughts that had plagued the deepest darkest recess of his mind since seeing Severus Snape for the first time in the great hall at Hogwart’s. “There is something you want from me Mr. Potter and I assure you it’s best you tell me now than have me search for it on my own and possibly expose other secrets you may not wish me to know.” Again the slight twitch of a smile tugged at the corner of Snape’s lips and Harry took a deep shuddering breath in as he realized Snape probably already knew. Of late Harry’s thoughts had strayed more and more towards Snape, spurred on by Snape’s extra credit classes and the ample stimulus material he’d been provided with. It had begun as just a feeling, an indescribable pull towards the man. Harry had rebelled against it furiously, fueling the animosity between the potion master and himself, in the hope of replacing this feeling with that of hate. It had worked to a point, but now it was growing stronger and of late had been forethought in his mind everyday.

“Power is a wonderful thing Mr. Potter. You can possess all of the power in the world but still want only to have someone hold power over you. Is that what you want Harry?” Snape paused and tilted his head to the side in question. Harry didn’t answer and instead stared down at where his fingers were twisting in his lap. Snape continued. “It’s not a crime to want to be taken care of, to be treated as if you’re the most precious thing in the world. Just because your Harry bloody Potter, the boy who won’t die, doesn’t mean your immune to certain kinks in human behavior.” Again Snape paused although this time encouraged by the way Harry’s gaze flickered up to meet his. “You asked why I don’t want Draco, and I’ll tell you why…It’s because he’s arrogant about the minuscule amount of power he has. He thinks that’s all he needs to survive in this world he’s not afraid of power yet he should be. I hate the way he lies beneath me, with an uncaring expression on his face as if he’s granting me some kind of privilege by allowing me access to his body. The truth however is that it is I who have the power Mr. Potter, it is I who choose to take pleasure from him and it is I who could take away his life without so much as lifting my wand.” Harry shivered from head to toe at Snape’s words, unaware that he’d whimpered audibly at Snape’s silky voice. “You understand that though don’t you Harry? You know I’m among the very few who can give you what you want and not take advantage of that power.” Harry nodded numbly swallowing difficultly as his eyes met Snape’s across the compartment. “Come here.” The command was precise and left no room for indecision. Automatically Harry rose from the bench seat and took the four steps necessary across the compartment to stand in front of Snape.

“Sir.” Harry whispered hating the way his lips trembled as he continued to stare into Snape’s dark onyx eyes. The smile in the corner of Snape’s lips blossomed into a very Slytherin smirk.

“You’re going to be just perfect Potter…” Snape trailed off as he reached up and tucked his hand behind Harry’s head, pulling the boy forward and down towards him. Harry knew what was coming, had felt it once before, had craved it for years. Automatically Harry’s eyes slid closed as Snape’s lips brushed over his own, before sealing the kiss with a firm press. Harry was in heaven. Unlike their first unease kiss in Snape’s office this was different. Snape took control almost immediately, making Harry’s knees shake as the man’s tongue slipped past his pert lips to dominate Harry’s within. Harry allowed himself to be molded, lost in the intoxicating aura that surrounded Snape like a cloud.

“Canteen Trolley!” Two loud unexpected knocks on the carriage door drew the pair apart, Harry more concerned than Snape seemed to be about the possibility of being caught. Snape stood casually from the seat and having straightened his jumper opened the door of the carriage to inspect the food on offer. Feeling decidedly weak all of a sudden Harry collapsed with a shuddering sigh on the bench, his lips still glistening with Snape’s kiss and his mouth parted in slight breathlessness.

Harry distantly listened to Snape talking with the attendant before finally Snape re entered the carriage with a small parcel of foodstuffs. Harry’s stomach growled in empty protest as he watched Snape unwrap some sandwiches. Harry waited patiently as Snape selected what he wanted before passing the others to Harry, along with a bottle of pumpkin juice. The pair ate in easy silence until Harry having had enough of his meal lay down along the bench, his eyes drooping sleepily. The last Harry remembered, as he fell asleep was Snape’s whispered chuckle as he conjured a pillow under Harry’s head.

“Won’t Dumbledore be pissed when he finds out…”

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TBC>>>>>