Coming of Age (Female Potter)

But when Snape arrives that night, she is flighty and distracted most of the night – something he’s never seen her be.  Not even when she was a student, when he was frequently doing his best to rattle her composure (which it shames him to think of, now – but, water under the bridge).  This is so out of character for her that it completely distracts him from his own concerns, and he inquires as gently as he can if something is the matter, and does she want him to go – and she looks at him and says that no, she wants him to stay.  Since she doesn’t elaborate, he doesn’t push, but he is definitely curious.

When they go to bed and the lights are out, he’s still wondering about her strange behavior tonight, and that thankfully distracts him enough that he’s not thinking so much about what happened last night.  As he’s almost asleep, she calls his name in a small, quiet voice.  He gives her a quick squeeze and says ‘hmmm…?’, and she is silent for a long moment; and then finally confesses that last night, she wasn’t dreaming about Sirius – she was dreaming about him. 

Her words are like a bomb going off in his brain, shattering everything he thought he knew - she feels his whole body go rigid as he absorbs this.  He is filled with a sense of wonder that he’s never known, no woman that he knows of has ever dreamed of him.  He is silent because he literally cannot think of anything to say, and also knows that he is probably going to be too choked up in a moment to say anything anyway.  Minutes go by, and she finally queries him – “Severus?”

He responds by wrapping both his arms around her and holding her so tightly that she almost can’t breathe; like he is drowning, and she is his only lifeline.  For his part he does almost feel that way; like the ship he was sailing on has been blown to matchsticks in a single moment, and he’s adrift in an endless sea and has no idea where solid land lies now. 

Reaching blindly towards the nightstand for her wand, she conjures a small light, just enough to see one another by.  He releases her and she looks into his black eyes, and he looks back at her like a frightened deer; in truth his heart is hammering like a cornered animal’s.  Ever so gently and never dropping her eyes from his, she caresses his face; finally leaning in to kiss him softly on the lips.  At first he doesn’t respond, mostly because he has so little experience with kissing anyone; but she is gentle and persistent, and gradually his mouth opens under hers and their tongues meet. 

The effect on him is electric and takes his breath away – never with even the most experienced and expensive woman of pleasure has it been anything like this.  Nor does he think of Lily even fleetingly – his mind is purely on Evie and no-one else.  His arousal is also immediate and almost painful, and it feels to him like her tongue is touching his manhood instead of his own tongue. 

She breaks away momentarily to look into his eyes again, and he starts to panic, not really knowing what he should do, this is uncharted territory for him.  He says “Evie, I…” and trails off, but she just smiles and puts her finger on his lips.  She pulls off her nightshirt, revealing that under it she is only wearing small panties, and he drinks in the sight of her as she climbs on top of him, only thin bits of cloth between them below the waist and nothing at all between them above it when she leans down and puts her bare chest against his, and begins to kiss him again. 

He holds on tightly as her tongue again dances with his, and he moans as she gently rocks her hips, rubbing herself against his throbbing erection.  He breaks the kiss for a moment, looking into her eyes and seeing something he’s never seen from any woman in his life; a combination of desire and longing coupled with strong emotion towards him.  It opens something within him, one last gate that he never really even knew was closed.

Fully confident in her desire of him now, that she actually wants him and it isn’t just that she’s aroused and he’s convenient, he rolls them both over to put himself on top and then moves down, taking a nipple into his mouth as he reaches down to caress her.  Her panties are soaked with her wetness, and he sits up to slide them off of her.  He looks at her body for a long moment, and then at her eyes, hooded with desire; and pulls off his shorts, entering her as soon as he’s back in position.

She closes her eyes and moans softly as he penetrates her.  When she opens them again, she finds him staring into her eyes, intensely and possessively as he takes her, slowly.  Besides leaving her in no doubt that he’s fully with her (and not the shade of her mother), it occurs to her that she never even thought about what the effect of the intensity of his eyes in bed could be.  It arouses her so much that she feels her climax building quickly.

The pace of his thrusts increases as he sees her closing her eyes in pleasure; and as she reaches her climax and he feels the contractions around his manhood, he can’t hold on any longer himself and fills her with wave after wave of his seed.

He feels intensely vulnerable after his climax; he’s never had anything like this, never felt anything more than just physical lust when with anyone, and this was clearly so much more than just that for both of them.  He withdraws and then pulls her close, partially because he wants her close, and partially so she can’t see his face until he’s had a few minutes to get it back under control again. 

The intensity of his feelings begins to fade as his body relaxes, and he pulls away and looks into her eyes; seeing complete contentment there.  He asks when she started feeling that way about him, and she says she’s actually not completely sure – sometime before the dream, obviously, but she’s not sure exactly when, it kind of sneaked up on her. 

He caresses her face and gives her a small smile, he understands what she means; it had sneaked up on him the same way, really.  She hasn’t said that she loves him and he doesn’t say it to her either; but it is very clear to him that she cares about him deeply and desires him as much as he does her.  And given that he’s never had that combination from anyone ever in his life, nor ever expected to have it from her either, for now it’s more than enough.

He rolls over onto his back and she nestles into the curve of his arm, and they don’t speak; but neither really feels like they need to, the silence is completely comfortable. 

After some time, he finally regretfully says that he should probably go, and she raises up to kiss him – and then he cannot think of anything but making love to her again, and he surprises even himself with how quickly he’s ready to.  She climbs on top of him and slides down onto his shaft, and he initially just watches her for a while, enjoying her body and her enjoyment of his, and in one way still finding it difficult to believe that this isn’t just one of his fantasies or a particularly vivid dream. 

He sits up, wanting to be closer, and she moves her legs until they are wrapped around his lower back.  He grasps her hips, controlling her rhythm, as he kisses her mouth, her neck, anything he can reach; and she does the same with him.  He gasps as his climax hits him, and she holds onto him tightly as he comes. 

Fortunately this time, the intensity immediately afterward doesn’t hit him so hard, and he can look into her eyes as she caresses his face and then kisses him softly on the lips.   He really doesn’t want to go, but he knows he has to; he takes his leave of her, still warmed by her kisses.  When he’s gone she rolls back over in the bed, breathing in his scent and the scent of their lovemaking; and falls into a deep and very contented sleep.