ENIGMA

Plot, new characters, new magical terms and abilities etc. are my intellectual property. If you want to borrow then please kindly ask. JK Rowling's characters and Wizarding Universe are all uniquely hers.

Summary: AU: What if everything we ever read in JK Rowling’s books was real – including the people characterised? What would you do if you found yourself caught up in that reality knowing what was to come? SS, RL, OC

Authors Note: It has been mentioned in the story but now I am noting it here. I am a fan of Diana Gabaldon’s ‘Outlander’/’Cross Stitch’ series and definitely was influenced by that in writing this story – i.e. the Standing Stones and traveling through time. But I also love Philip Pullman’s ‘His Dark Materials’ series and the tv programme ‘Sliders’ and the alternate universes alongside ours idea comes from there no doubt.

Fantasy/Drama

This story is rated R/M.

ENIGMA

Chapter 018: The Crossroads I

“How could you Jessica!” Severus roared. “Do you have any idea what you have probably just done!”

“I HAD NO CHOICE! NONE! You of all people know what Granger is like! She wouldn’t back down and I can’t blame her – I know I sure as hell wouldn’t in her shoes. I wouldn’t let anyone try and convince me that what I’d seen with my own eyes wasn’t real!”

The Potions Master opened his mouth to speak but the words would not come. His breathing was laboured and hard – Jessica was right; he of all people would have never backed away from what his senses were telling him if had been himself in Granger’s place. Still – there was no guarantee the little know-it-all could even be trusted.

“Discretion is most definitely not a virtue of anyone in that house,” he seethed.

He slammed his hand down on her desk, causing the inkwell to tip over. He nearly destroyed whatever it was he was working on, and that only served to further upset him.

“There was nothing else I could do, Severus! Please don’t be like this!”

There was nothing but an angry silence and Jessica felt more and more to blame for something she had no control over.

“Hermione Granger has never struck me as the sort who would go around telling tales and spreading gossip, especially knowing how destructive it could be. She gave me her word – and I don’t have a reason not to trust her; she’s got her issues, lord knows, but she’s better than you want to give her credit for right now!” she said with a sniff.

Snape put his head in his hands and then pulled his hands down his face several times.

“McGonagall was under the impression that the Dementors were fighting over you; which would suggest that somehow, someway your situation is known to someone in this world besides those of us closest to the Headmaster – and now Miss Granger…”

“I disagree, actually. I think the Dementors had been deprived of a good meal for too long and I was too much of a temptation. The morning hadn’t fully dawned yet – officially they were still bound to be on patrol; you certainly thought so as we headed into Hogsmeade. Whoever was out there was fair game. It just happened to me rather than you – and it could have easily been someone else. And whatever it is that Tom Riddle is right now – he has no consciousness of me as I did him. Don’t ask me how, but I’m sure of it.”

“I have actually had the same thoughts myself; but with everything going on – I just wanted you to be alright before I laid all of that at your feet,” the Potions Master sighed.

There was a sharp pain in her abdomen and Jessica sucked in her breath.

“Oh!” she moaned, dropping into a seat and trying to regulate her breathing.

Snape jumped up and flew around the desk.

“Are you alright? The baby…?”

“He’s alright – just a little agitated by our arguing I think.”

The professor let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and gave a faint nod.

“Promise me you will take it easy. You and the baby matter to me – nothing else…”

“I have a couple of things to finish and then I’m going back to our quarters.”

Snape pulled Jessica into his arms and held her close. “I’m sorry…” he murmured quietly into her hair. “I just…I just don’t want anything to happen to you…”

“I know,” Jessica whispered as she held his face in her hands and gave him a kiss. “But Severus – the more we try to control things, the more things seem to go wrong… We just have to let things take their course…whatever it is meant to be.”

Snape looked her ruefully.

“I know. That is what I have been afraid of…”

xxxOOOxxx

Professor Lupin hadn’t seen Jessica for weeks. Outside of teaching classes and grading coursework, his was a relative solitary existence at Hogwarts. But his life had come to be extremely isolated one in the aftermath of the First War of Voldemort.

He was looking for a particular book to do a bit of fact-checking before the last exams of the term.

‘God – how sad is this? Bank Holiday Weekend and I am in the bloody Library like a male Hermione Granger…’ he thought to himself.

He stood at the front desk. But before he could call on Madam Pince, the sound of intense arguing reached his ears. Lupin followed the now shrill screaming from one of the combatants (for that is exactly what they sounded like – it was the mother of all bust-ups) and found himself near the Restricted Section observing Madam Pince trying to break Jessica yet again.

“What is your problem now?” Jessica asked a bit irritably.

She wasn’t feeling well and the last thing she needed was yet another run-in with Pince.

She’d had to raise her voice slightly to be heard, but she wasn’t going to loose her rag like the old woman who most definitely was not in charge even though she suffered under the delusion that she was. Jessica didn’t report into Pince and that was definitely a good thing. McGonagall had definitely known what she was doing with that arrangement. The Deputy Headmistress could be tough and sometimes pushed too many of the wrong buttons with Jessica, but at least she could be fair – most of the time.

“Who do you think you are!” Pince shrieked, “Swanning around like Lady Muck…meddling in things you shouldn’t be…”

“Ahem hem! Excuse me, Ladies,” Lupin said. “I was wondering if one of you could help me…”

“Of course, Professor,” Jessica answered quickly. “What can I do for you?”

Pince looked outraged and opened her mouth to speak; but before she could utter a word Lupin turned his attention to the interloper on her territory. The older woman didn’t want to be anywhere near the werewolf – but she would be damned if her Ladyship would get an oar in.

“I have been looking around for the past few days – a book called ‘Nevermind the Bollocks – The Truth About Kappas’. I can’t find it anywhere and I need to check a few things in preparation for my final exams for the Third Years before the Summer holidays.”

“A bit eager, eh Professor?” Jessica said with a smile. “I wish I could tell you where it is – but since Madam here has not done any shelving for the last month, I have absolutely no idea where to start looking to be honest…”

“You little…” Pince hissed with a glare. “I know where it is! I know where every single book in this Library is!”

“Of course you do,” Jessica said with a sniff, making it quite clear she knew that was a lie.

She had spent over an hour trying to help Hermione Granger find some books she was anxious to have for Lupin’s class when Pince wasn’t able to. Her heart was in her throat as she helped the young Gryffindor. She knew by now that Hermione has sussed that her Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher was a werewolf. Jessica couldn’t wiggle her way out of helping the girl get the proof she needed.

But Jessica had played nice and polite for so long with Madam Pince, too bloody long. It was time to roll up her sleeves and get dirty. She was from West Philly, not some snooty, aristocratic English estate even if that was the accent she spoke with in her adopted country.

“One small problem – Madam… As I have pointed out to you so many times that I am making myself sick having to say it yet again, it makes NO sense that only one person is able to find anything around here, if they find what they are looking for at all! There are five bloody floors of books spanning the breadth of the castle. It is too much for one person even under the best of circumstances! We have to trust students and faculty to be able to function independently and not be so duty-bound such as to have to seek us out for every little thing – it’s no wonder nothing gets done and acquisitions are down – I have spent too much time looking for books instead of purchasing and organising! We have not fulfilled any requests for over a month and that is unacceptable! I have never been at a library that didn’t function well under the Dewey Decimal Classification System! You don’t have to like it – but you damn well better get used to it! You don’t bother to shelve and when you do you deliberately misfile and I will not stand for it anymore! This Library should tick over like clockwork regardless of who is on duty!”

“I never heard of it and I don’t care – things were fine as they were!”

“There is a first time for everything! I have a job to do Madam Pince – and I could do with getting on with it and at least a modicum of respect and professional courtesy from you! I am sick and tired of this nonsense day-in and day-out. If you don’t like it – then see Professor Dumbledore – again!”

Just then the bell sounded from the old clocktower.

“Oh I will take this up with him all right – and McGonagall!” Pince huffed before storming off.

“God almighty…” Jessica said angrily. “I haven’t done anything to her and all I get is grief!”

Before Lupin could say anything she grabbed her belly and doubled up, clearly in pain. The blood drained from his face at the sight.

“Something’s not right – come on, you need Madam Pomfrey!”

“I…I’m alright. He’s just… me being upset distresses him. The same thing happens when Severus and I argue…”

Lupin didn’t answer as he took in the sight of Jessica’s pale and clammy skin.

“You aren’t well, Jessica. Don’t argue with me, let’s go…”

She could barely stand up and so the werewolf scooped her up and carried her in his arms, resisting the temptation to ask her what could she and Severus possibly be arguing about – and so much?

xxxOOOxxx

“Well?” Snape snapped. “Have you any real diagnosis to make or are you just taking yet another wild guess!”

“Without a proper medical history all I can do is guess, Professor!” Madam Pomfrey snorted.

“The baby just kicked harder than usual…that’s all…” Jessica said frustratedly.

She had wanted to thank Remus, but he disappeared the moment he heard the Potions Master was on his way to the infirmary.

“The mother knows better than anyone else would,” the mediwitch sniffed.

“Great – then there is no reason for me to stay here.”

“You seem to be alright now,” Snape said unconvincingly. “And if the medical professional cannot be of service then there is no point to remaining.”

“Exactly. I just want to be in my own bed – you’re just as qualified to look after me…”

Not wanting to argue and risk another episode with the pregnancy, the professor picked Jessica up and carried her back to their quarters. Surprisingly, several lights were on when they stepped through the portrait.

“I neglected to mention that we have a visitor…” Snape said cryptically.

“MUMMY!” came a little squeak as he lay Jessica down on their bed and arranged the blankets.

“Harvey? HARVEY!” Jessica screeched as a fat bundle of purple fluff flung itself on her.

“Harvey!” Snape snapped. “What did I tell you about being careful with your mother? She isn’t well!”

The little butterball of a Jarvey sniffed and then burst into tears as he clung to Jessica.

“Harvey missed Mummy! Harvey wants to stay with Mummy and Daddy!”

Jessica looked up at Severus, searching his face for answers.

“He belongs with us, not the Headmaster,” the Potions Master said quietly as he adjusted the blankets and then stoked the fire. “Although god knows what Dumbledore has been feeding him…”

“One too many sherbet lemons and custard tarts, it looks like…” Jessica said, stifling a yawn as she lay on her side.

Harvey curled up beside her, fascinated with her bump. He gave it a gentle poke, causing Jessica to smile.

“Mummy fat,” Harvey squeaked. “Mummy fat like Harvey!”

“Gee thanks – but not quite…” Jessica yawned.

“Your mother needs rest, Harvey, and so do I,” Snape said scooping the little Jarvey up with one hand.

“Awwwww!”

“We have the whole of the weekend and the Bank Holiday to be together. You will sleep in your own room, no arguments.” Snape said firmly.

“My. Own. Room?” the little Jarvey squeaked as he was carried out of his parents’ bedroom.

“Yes – your own room…” came a gruff answer.

A few minutes later Severus returned and changed into his nightshirt.

“Merlin’s beard, what a day,” he murmured. “Thank Merlin hee was sound asleep before I even finished settling him down for the night.”

“Thank you,” Jessica said sleepily as he gently pulled her into his arms.

“What for?” Severus teased.

“For getting our baby boy back; it feels… right… again….”

Severus gave her a kiss.

“Get some sleep, we can talk in the morning.”

“Oh?”

“Nothing serious – except trying to explain where babies come from…”

“Oh mother… shouldn’t you take him out for an ice cream or something?”

“Ice cream? What does food have to do with it?”

“Well you can’t take him to a baseball game, now can you?”

“A what?”

Jessica smiled and burst into laughter.

“A friend a grew up with – him and his brothers always knew when they were in for ‘The Talk’… Their father would take each one on his own to see the Phillies. They learned more about baseball than they cared to rather than that weapon of mass destruction between their legs…”

“Weapon? Mass destruction? Jessica, don’t you think you are being a bit melodramatic? It is not entirely a man’s fault if woman falls pregnant! She carries as much the blame as he does!”

“When men rape love has nothing to do with it!” Jessica snapped. “Its about violence and degredation and control and I don’t want to hear it about women who rape – its not even the same bloody thing!”

“Jessica, I do NOT want to fight with you….!”

“I’M NOT FIGHTING!”

“Oh no? Then what in blazes do you call this then? I asked a simple question and then get attacked over your own answer!

Jessica burst into tears.

“I’m sorry; I’m sorry Severus. It’s just my hormones…they are out of control!”

She cried even harder and Snape hugged her close.

“You are not well, Jessica. Something about this pregnancy is a problem for you… “

“What? No, Severus… there’s nothing wrong – there can’t be…”

“You haven’t been well for some time and we both know it. You are not a Muggle from this world and Merlin only knows how compatible our physiologies are…”

Jessica began to cry even harder; she’d been wondering the same thing for a while. The more she thought about it, the more stressed and upset she was. She didn’t want to loose her baby…

“Promise me you will take it easy!” Snape begged as he held her tight. “There is no one we can consult about this….”

“If others from this world made it to mine and assimilated – there has to be compatibility, there has to!”

“It is likely that there are degrees of compatibility. DNA is complex enough in either world I would imagine… But this; this is something far more difficult. The problems that you are having – did you have them… before… with you ex-husband?”

Jessica sighed through her tears.

“No – I didn’t. I miscarried because of his violence… He didn’t want a baby or me and he was determined to not be a father.”

Both fell silent as Severus digested the implications of what was finally laid bare to him.

“I can’t believe I even managed it with you. The doctors had me fairly convinced I would never have children after that… I just… I wanted you so much I didn’t even consider the possibility. Here I am in this world I have only ever read about and dreamt about – and the one person who interested me takes notice. And he’s not exactly the character Rowling wrote – he’s…” Jessica sniffed.

“What…?” Snape murmured. “I have dreaded asking you… about… what that, that woman said about me… what did she say? I want to know!”

Jessica looked past him out the window as they lay together. This was a moment she had known would come and dreaded. How could she tell him that in her world opinion was sharply divided; that he just a heartless figure of derision, hate and ugliness to many – he was evil and a murderer. And yet to others he was an anti-hero, but decidedly romanticized. The literary Severus Snape was a fascinatingly complex man. The Harry filter of Canon was not kind to him. It was filling in the blanks that made the enigmatic Potions Master even more fascinating.

“Well,” Snape said between hard swallows. “I suppose your silence speaks volumes.”

There was an awkward silence which he broke.

“But… there must have been something worthwhile there… you fell in love with me…”

Jessica couldn’t answer – how could she possibly answer that any better than she had the first time they touched on this subject? She said as much – but far from placating Severus it did nothing but aggravate him.

Snape sat up and swung his legs out so that his feet touched the floor.

“You fell in love with an idea – not with me. You have no real idea who I am! You came into this world with ideas about me that have nothing to do with the flesh and blood man that I am!”

“So I am having the baby of a stranger, is that it? I haven’t learned anything about you?”

“You have no idea what I have done! We have not spoken of it!”

“To be a Death Eater – you are capable of extreme cruelty; pain; hate…”

“I do not believe you have ever thought of these matters as you ought. I am not some romantic hero from one of your novels, Jessica. I have done things that have damned my soul for all eternity! There is nothing that can save me – not even you! You don’t even know me – not really! This is a nightmare for you – but at the same time; it’s the stuff of your fantasies, born of frustration out of the pain and emptiness that was your life!”

“So – so what all this boils down to is you fucked one hell of a fan girl who is living out some macabre fantasy? Thanks Severus, thanks for nothing!”

Snape said nothing as he turned around and shot her a venomous look. He stood up fast and got dressed.

“For God’s sake where are you going?” Jessica cried out. “This is madness!”

“Yes – it most certainly is! The Headmaster had the best of intentions in bringing us together in his mind – but he was wrong and once again I am paying a heavy a price for his machinations! I should have fought harder against getting close to you as he demanded!”

Jessica’s face looked like it had been slapped.

“So – you were with me out of duty to Dumbledore. Nice…”

“I guess we’re even!” Snape hissed.

“And I guess I don’t really know you after all… I only thought I did. I wanted to see the real you that’s lost from even from yourself… I thought I did – but I was wrong… dead wrong… It was all smoke and mirrors – nothing more…”

“Love is nothing but an illusion!”

“Well – another fine ‘How do you do’…Dumbledore got what he wanted and ruined our lives in the process. Interesting… ‘

Snape said nothing and stormed out of the bedroom.

Jessica was still until she heard the door to their quarters slam shut. She shook her head numbly, willing herself to calm down. It was to no avail. She began to rock back and forth, crying hard as she clutched her unborn child. She sat for what felt like an eternity, rocking in a heady stupor. Her life in this strange new world was torn asunder and there was no way to repair the damage.

xxxOOOxxx

“But he loves us…” she wailed softly after a great deal of time had passed. “He…OH!”

She stood up shakily. Something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong with the baby.

“Severus...” she moaned. “Oh God, Severus!”

Hot beads of sweat poured down her body and she realised that she couldn’t be here all alone. She needed the only person in this world who meant anything to her. She needed Severus.

Jessica reached into their closet and pulled out a dress. She forced herself to walk through crippling pain to the door and through it, but not before vomiting. She looked at the floor in a tearful haze.

Blood.

She was vomiting blood.

“Oh God, please… Please help me…” she cried as she stumbled forward.

It felt like hours were passing rather than minutes as she shuffled slowly down the hall, bent over from pain. She made her way down to Severus’ office only to find he wasn’t there….

Only a hot cauldron filled with a foul-smelling liquid.

Smelling it made her feel even worse.

“I need…help…” Jessica groaned out loud. “I need you, Severus; I need you so much right now!”

She waited a few minutes and still he did not come. This made no sense. He would be the last one to leave his office unattended and for so long completely unlocked and unwarded.

“Remus – maybe Remus can help me…”

Jessica made it as far as the end of the hall before collapsing. She felt a trickle down a leg and began to cry.

“Remus! REMUS!”

She clutched at her belly, doubled over in pain as she crept forward. It was as though she was being stabbed and then ripped apart. And the trickle became heavier and it was both legs now.

Jessica made it to the werewolf’s office…

…and fell apart when she saw that the lights were on and no one was there.

“God please… why are you doing this to me?” she cried.

She looked down and a horror-filled recognition came over her.

There on Remus’ desk was The Marauder’s Map and a goblet that was steaming with a potion that had not been touched. That smell…it was the same potion from the cauldron in Severus’ office.

Jessica looked out the window at the Whomping Willow.

Its violently waving branches were now stock-still.

“Oh my God. No!...” she railed in disbelief. “No! I could have stopped him! It didn’t have to happen… and it’s all my fault! ARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!”

She threw up again, and there was more pain and blood.

The pain; God help her the pain…

Severus.

He would need someone on his side. She had to go to him. He would be coming out of the Whomping Willow – one way or other he would be coming out. In the book Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, he was unconscious and tied up with his head lolling to the side like a grotesque dummy; in the film he chasing after Harry and his friends, only to put his life on the line to protect them from Remus Lupin who had fully transformed into a werewolf. And all this because of Peter Pettigrew, who was not dead as had been believed and was set to rejoin Lord Voldemort. Peter Pettigrew, the unregistered Animagus who had been masquerading as Ron’s pet rat Scabbers for over a decade.

So it had begun.

They were on the precipice of the next great war of Voldemort. The first sign would be the Dark Mark on Severus’ arm burning black. He would show it to the Minister of Magic later this very night, according to the book, when the politician refused to believe that Voldemort was back. The first sign for all in the wizarding world would come in a few months time, at the Quidditch World Cup.

“No – I won’t let you face this on your own!” she murmured.

Jessica steeled herself through the blood, tears and pain and forced herself to leave Lupin’s office and make her way towards the Great Hall. She didn’t care about anyone else – only the man she still deeply and desperately loved.

Severus needed her; and she and their unborn child needed him.