Flame of Existence

--> See Introduction for warnings/disclaimer.

FLAME OF EXISTENCE
/ by Bella

Chapter Seventeen

The morning of the Hogsmeade trip was gray and unpromising. Tired students yawned as they exited the grounds of Hogwarts a bit earlier than usual. The Headmaster had said that they had permission to leave earlier and stay later due to the fact that more students were going to shop for dress robes and whatnot.

Hermione walked silently beside Ginny and Ron, thinking. Ron had been released from the infirmary two weeks prior and was excited about finally being able to buy new, but cheap still, dress robes for the Ball.

“I\'ve never bought dress robes before, not on my own,” Ron said quietly to Ginny who smiled gently back at her big brother. The Weasley\'s seemed to be doing better ever since Arthur, their father, got promoted at the Ministry.

Hermione was lost in thought when she distantly heard her name being called. She turned her head to look back and saw the anxious face of Stephen Cornfoot catching up with her.

“Hermione ” He said finally as he stopped jogging and matched his steps with hers. He paid no attention to Ron or Ginny who were looking at him oddly. “The Ball is two weeks away, and we still have to go over some last minute details. Now, about the drapings--”

“Stephen, can we do this some other time?” Hermione snapped as she ran a hand through her hair, which was quickly frizzing from drying in the warm morning air.

Stephen only looked momentarily baffled. “Oh... well, okay then. Could we meet over lunch today, possibly?”

Hermione glanced questioningly over at Ginny and Ron who just shrugged in response, and then reluctantly turned back to Stephen. “Well... fine. Yes, lunch would be okay. How about the Three Broomsticks at noon?”

Stephen nodded quickly and smiled. “Sounds good. We have a bit to go over... Well, see you then, Hermione.”

Hermione watched as he quickened his pace and caught up with some of his fellow house. She shook her head and frowned.

“That boy is extremely annoying,” she muttered as the group turned into the main street of Hogsmeade.

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Hermione found that she severely disliked shopping for clothes. She had been walking through every shop imaginable in Hogsmeade in search of a gown and dress robes for the Halloween Ball. On top of that, Ginny had been insisting that she try on every dress in the store, it seemed.

Hermione gritted her teeth as she pulled on the latest gown, a tight, light-green piece of fabric that left nothing to the imagination. Getting it on, she stared at herself critically in the mirror. She didn\'t like how it hugged her breasts and hips, and she didn\'t like the color.

Perfect dress for Pansy, Hermione thought silently. She nearly fell over when she heard Ginny bang on the door.

“Come on, \'Mione. Let me see ”

Hermione rolled her eyes and opened the door. “I look like a whore.”

She watched as Ginny\'s eyes widened. “It\'s perfect, Hermione You\'ll knock everyone off their feet. You have to get it.”

“I don\'t know, Ginny. I\'m not very comfortable.”

“But you look great And the Ball won\'t be that long, Hermione,” Ginny insisted and smiled. She really reminded Hermione of Mrs. Weasley at times.

“I look like a whore ” Hermione exclaimed as her eyes filled with tears. She looked down at herself.

Ginny grabbed Hermione\'s hands and looked at her seriously. “What\'s wrong, Hermione? You look beautiful.”

Hermione shook her head and retreated back into the dressing room and shut the door. Leaning against it, she closed her eyes and tried to level her breathing. Ginny didn\'t know what had happened to her. Hermione never disclosed with her friend that she had been raped by Draco Malfoy.

Of course she knew that Draco had been expelled because of trying something with Hermione, but Ginny didn\'t know that there had even been a first successful time.

She straightened herself up and smoothed the material over her hips, glaring at herself. She ignored the sound of Ginny\'s voice softly filtering into the room and yanked the gown off of her. Once fully out, she hung it back up and dressed.

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By noon, Hermione had finally found a gown that both complimented her figure and left enough to the imagination. It was another green one, this time just a tad bit darker and made the natural earthtones of her eyes and hair stand out.

Hermione said her goodbyes to Ginny at noon and headed for the Three Broomsticks. Upon entering, she saw both Ron and Harry seated at a table and waving her over with broad grins on their faces. She also spotted Stephen Cornfoot sitting in a corner booth with his nose stuck in what she guessed were plans for the Ball.

She quickly wove her way through the tables and stood before Harry and Ron. “Guys, I\'m sorry, but I told Stephen Cornfoot I\'d go over some stuff for the Ball right now. I\'ll catch up with you both after lunch, okay?”

Harry and Ron nodded and agreed to meet at Flourish & Blotts later that afternoon. Hermione turned and walked over to the table where Stephen was sitting. She took a seat down in front of him, surprising him and making him jump a little.

“Sorry,” she muttered as she picked up the paper he had been looking at. They were the plans for the wall coverings he had been talking about.

“This is very nice,” she said, staring at the picture of blue drapery that glittered like the night sky. “Very majestic...”

“I know ” Stephen exclaimed in excitement as he shoved more papers into her hands.

Two hours, four butterbeers and a ham sandwich later, the two completed what they needed to finish concerning the Ball. They paid their portions of the tab and got up to leave. After saying a quick goodbye, Hermione dashed off to Flourish and Blotts where she found her two best friends and Ginny seated outside smiling.

The skies had remarkably cleared and the air grew warmer as the afternoon progressed. Sometime around six, the group started back for the castle. The walk back was pleasant, as the sun was setting and the conversation was quiet.

Hermione broke off from the group when she arrived at the entrance to her rooms, and dragged her purchases onto the sofa in front of the fireplace. Carefully removing her gown from the bag, Hermione took it out and examined it in the firelight.

It truly was lovely - silk, and very flowy, and she knew that it would look even better with the black mask she bought to go with it. Hermione smiled gently as turned to hang the gown up in her wardrobe, thinking of what Severus\'s reaction would be the night of the Ball.

As if on cue, there was a soft knock on the door a moment later. Hermione rushed to hide her gown in the wardrobe and then quickly made her way to the door. She cast a quick revealing charm and saw Severus standing there looking nervous.

She smiled to herself as she unwarded the door and opened it. The feared potions master was standing there with his hands clasped behind his back and an anything but pleasant look upon his features. Hermione checked the hallway before grabbing the front of his robes and yanking him into her rooms.

Door shut and locked again, Hermione practically pounced on him. Before she could get her lips to connect with his, she was stopped by one of his large hands. Severus pushed her off of him and withdrew a fresh box of the Dreamless Sleep draught that he had made for her.

“Hermione, I cannot stay. I have a meeting with the Headmaster. Here is some more of the draught you have been taking.”

Hermione recovered from her initial reaction to his brush off and took the box with a smile. “Thank you, Severus. I really app--”

“You must be responsible, Hermione.” Snape said shortly, cutting her off. “This draught is--”

“Extremely addictive if taken in large potions. I know, Severus. I\'m not brainless, you know.” She smiled at him a little.

He returned the smile only a little before leaning down to brush his lips with hers. “How was your day in Hogsmeade?”

“It was good... I got a lot done, so yes, very good.”

“Very well. I must be off, Professor Dumbledore is waiting. Goodnight, Hermione.”

He waved his wand and unwarded the doors in a second. He turned and started out the door as Hermione gently said her goodbyes.

Once out in the hallway, Snape turned and redirected himself towards the Headmaster\'s office. His robes billowed ominously behind him as he thought about Hermione. She was all he ever seemed to be thinking about lately, and for Severus Snape that was a very, very odd thing for him to do.

He hadn\'t thought about a female so much since his own school days when he had that silly crush on Lily Evans, Potter\'s mother. After that fantasy went flying down the drain, he never allowed himself to want a woman so badly again. In fact, the realization that he even did want a woman so badly again made him cringe in self disgust. And oh...

... How he wanted her. The mere fact that he had to push her away tonight made his insides curl. He would have liked nothing less than to become that overly disgusting professor who took his number one student in the middle of her Head Girl\'s rooms.

His fists curled around the opening of his robes as he shook even the thought out of his mind, and he continued his walk to Albus\'s office. He knew the Headmaster was giving him more leeway then he deserved, but he still felt like he was getting ripped. Finally, the stone gargoyle came into view and as he approached he felt all emotion dropping from his being.

He was putting his defenses up again.

End of Chapter Seventeen / To Be Continued

A/N: Sorry for the delay - I\'ve been in a writer\'s funk lately. This chapter is a tad bit shorter than the rest, and for that I apologize.
Next chapter coming soon! Also, thanks for all of the responses to my little HBP rant. Really appreciated. You guys ROCK {keep \'em coming }