Marriage Law

AN: Sorry, kids








AN: Sorry, kids. If I was independently wealthy I’d write
all day, but I can’t. I got a job.

 

Megan: I think Jacob’s sexy, too.

 

For some reason a lot of people have beskinsking me if I’m
British. Nope. California. (Obviously,
by the fanny uproar.) I tried to keep the speech true to the book. (Sort of.)

 

You get to hear a wee bit of a story now:

My pops Portuguese. When I was little I asked him why we
don’t speak Portuguese and his mother loftily stated “because we live here
now.” (Poor pop, never gets a word in.) I’m adopted and growing up I found out
I was ½ Puerto Rican. Much to mums dismay, she never wanted anyone to know I
was a half-breed. Yes, some Americans still buy into the ‘dirty blood’ idea.
(Think: Hermione being raised by Bellatrix…) I have tried to learn Spanish
THREE TIMES and failed miserably. I’ve come to the conclusion it’s because I
can’t learn any other languages and speak eloquently until I can do so with my
own language. (I’m also the type of kid that read the dictionary for fun. I was
the only third grader that knew what a codpiece was. Teach that nasty teacher
to make me copy a page out of a
dictionary.)

 

And I love British TV. John Inman needs to be cast in HP4
SOMEWHERE!!! You can pick up a lot of things like speech patterning if you
watch shows with a broad array of dialects. If anyone knows of a book with
examples of British dialects and examples of how they should be properly
written down you will be my new best friend.

 

To all British readers: Lol, I had no idea what fanny meant over
there. In America
it’s your bum. (Usually used by grannies as: “Get your fanny in here!”) I was
trying not to be vulgar and failed miserably. (Story of my life…)

 

To all American readers: Did you know in Britain
a fanny is a woman’s naughty bits? The last chapter takes on an entirely
different tone :)

 

On with the show………

 

Marriage Law Chapter 18

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Anastasia Snape downed the bitter contents of the small blue
bottle halfway through her breakfast. Hermione looked at the bottle curiously.

 

A droplet on the lip of the bottle shimmered silvery green
in the sunlight falling softly through the tree branches in the dining room.

 

“It’s a youth serum Severus came up with,” Anastasia beamed.
“He was such a clever little boy.”

 

“Really, Mother,” Severus pinkened under Hermione’s gaze. He
noticed her look, delighted and surprised at his embarrassment. He felt the
pink deepen into a red.

 

“He came up with this as a boy?” Hermione asked.

 

“It was his 7th year project,” said Jacob. “His
mother begged him to try it.”

 

“I just wanted to see him make something useful,” Anastasia
insisted. Hermione caught Jacob roll his eyes before his face disappeared
behind the Russian language paper he was reading. Hermione couldn’t read the
headline, but it looked like Viktor Krum’s wife, Tristan had given birth to
twin girls. Tears were openly streaming down his smiling face as he held one of
the tiny girls. Tristan looked weary, but smiled at the camera holding the
other girl.

 

Anastasia noticed Hermione’s gaze.

 

“You are a fan of Bulgaria?”
Anastasia asked.

 

“She’s a friend of Krum’s,” Snape said taking a sip of his
tea.

 

“Viktor Krum is your friend?”
Jacob’s interest was suddenly piqued.

 

“We met during the tri-wizard tournament,” said Hermione.
“We went to the ball together.”

 

“You’re that
girl?” Anastasia said amazed and glancing at Severus.

 

“Mother,” Severus said, not bothering to hide his
disappointment. “You’ve been reading those rags again.”

 

“Well,” said Anastasia huffing. “One can’t help but hear
international news.”

 

“That pathetic fib made international news,” Hermione said
incredulously.

 

“So, before this gets silly what really happened?” Jacob
said curiously. Hermione thanked any higher power that was listening that at
least one person in this family had sense.

 

“I’m friends with Harry,” Hermione said. “I’m friends with
Viktor, though he had a bit of a crush on me for awhile. Obviously he’s gotten
over it.”

 

Jacob looked at the front of the paper.

 

“Obviously,” he said. “Well I, for one, am glad that’s been
cleared up.”

 

Hermione heard a tone of finality and knew Anastasia would
talk of it no longer. Her mother had a tone that was similar.

 

“So,” Hermione said, going back to Anastasia. “What does the
potion do, exactly?”

 

“If you drink them religiously you can slow down the aging
process,” Anastasia said. “If you’re elderly it can reverse the aging process
altogether.”

 

“How does it do that?” Hermione asked.

 

“It makes the body think it’s still growing. It builds and
replenishes new cells at an advanced rate,” Severus said. “Then it causes the
old cells to slough off so you don’t get all lumpy with build up.”

 

“That was a bug that took awhile to work out,” said Jacob,
his shoulders shaking with laughter behind his paper.

 

“It wasn’t funny,” said Anastasia hotly. “If you were a
gentleman you’d never speak of it again.”

 

“Then I’m jolly well glad I’m no gentleman,” said Jacob from
behind his paper. Then he burped.

 

“I cannot eat with a pig,” said Anastasia throwing down her
napkin. “I’m going to gather our things.” She rose and stormed off.

 

“Nosy thing, isn’t she?” said Jacob, lowering his paper when
he was sure Anastasia was gone.

 

“Too late to do anything about it now,” Severus said
shrugging. He turned to Hermione. “I’m sorry you have to be inflicted with this.
She’ll get into your parentage at some point. Just remember: she really doesn’t
intend to be mean or malicious, she just doesn’t know any better.”

 

“Alright,” said Hermione. “I’m sure she would never mean any
harm.”

 

“Indeed,” said Jacob behind his paper, making Hermione
wonder.

 

***

 

Severus and Hermione saw his parents off soon after lunch.
Hermione watched curiously as Jacob loaded up the flying carpet.

 

“You ever seen one?” he asked, watching her expression.

 

“No,” Hermione said.

 

“You should get Severus to take you on an ariel tour with
the estate carpet,” Jacob said. “He was never very much good on a broom, but he
can manage a carpet alright.”

 

“I’ll remind him, later,” said Hermione, glancing back at
the house and making out the shadows of Severus and Anastasia arguing in the
kitchen window.

 

“Don’t let the Snape temperament put you off,” said Jacob
tying down a large red trunk. “We’re a fairly vocal group.”

 

“I knew that,” said Hermione chuckling.

 

“Suppose you did,” said Jacob smiling at her. “You seem to
be a strong lass, you’ll do fine. Don’t let him walk over you.”

 

“I don’t plan on it,” said Hermione, straightening herself a
bit.

 

“No one ever plans on it,” said Jacob.

 

Suddenly there was a loud noise from the house.

 

“Jacob!” Anastasia shrieked out the now open kitchen window.
It was more of a command than a request.

 

“See what I mean,” said Jacob finishing his knot and
standing up straight.

 

“Yes, my dear?” Jacob yelled back. Hermione noticed he made
no move to get closer to the house.

 

“Tell Severus he must at least come visit us for a week in France
during his break,” Anastasia demanded.

 

“I’m sure we can manage a week,” said Hermione under her
breath before something reflecting the annoyed look on Jacob’s face came out of
his mouth.

 

“They’re on their honeymoon,” said Jacob exasperatedly.
“They want some time alone, darling.”

 

“They can untangle themselves for a week,” said Anastasia
firmly. “We have bedchambers in France
as well.”

 

“Mother!” Hermione heard Severus behind her in the kitchen,
appalled. She waved a hand dismissively at him.

 

“I’m sure we can stop on our way back to Britain,”
yelled Hermione.

 

Anastasia looked smug as she retreated back to the kitchen,
closing the shutters as she pulled her head back in.

 

“Last stop on the way home,” said Jacob. “Good choice.”

 

Hermione shrugged.

 

***

 

Severus and Hermione waved his parents off and retreated
back into the kitchens.

 

“Pieter should be here soon,” said Severus. He stoked a fire
in the kitchen fireplace and set the table for tea.

 

“Can I help?” asked Hermione.

 

“The elves made small cakes last night,” said Severus
absentmindedly. “They should be in the large crystal cube in the counter.”

 

Hermione tried not to cringe at the mention of the house
elves. She knew they must be present, but she was hoping to discover their
whereabouts and recruit them into S.P.E.W. later.

 

Hermione looked at the crystal cube on the counter. It was
frosted and she could see something in it, although she couldn’t figure out how
to open it. Severus looked over her shoulder when he couldn’t figure out what
was taking her so long.

 

“One of the brightest students at Hogwarts can’t figure out
how to open a preservation chamber?” Severus said silkily behind her.

 

Hermione was no longer a student at Hogwarts. He could no
longer treat her like a fool. They shared the same name, although not the same
life. They were partners in the Order. Plus, she was still annoyed at him after
his display this morning. She decided to take Jacobs advice.

 

She brought her bent arm back sharply and felt it sink into
Severus’ gut.

 

His chin smacked the top of her head firmly as he doubled
over.

 

They both fell to the floor as they tried to balance
themselves.

 

“Well it’s nice to see Albus has chosen competent agents,”
boomed a thick Russian-accented voice behind them.

 

“Hello, Pieter,” said Severus pulling himself up from the
floor and offering Hermione a hand, although he was s rub rubbing his sore
stomach. She looked up, rubbing the top of her head. Severus was smiling at
her. A lock of black hair dangled in his face and she noticed little lines
framing his black eyes as the corners of his mouth curled up.

 

She felt light-headed. It must be from the bump on her head.

 

Pieter reached out to her other hand and the men pulled her
to her feet.

 

Pieter was a dark haired, tall wizard with a long black
beard he kept tucked in his gold belt. His deep burgundy robes seemed to be
made out of thick wool. Hermione could see the tips of black curly-toed boots
poking out from under his hem. His white teeth glinted ferally at her from the
depths of his facial hair. One of his bright blue eyes winked at her.

 

“Thank you,” said Hermione. She watched as Pieter slid the
top of the seamless box to the side and grabbed a small cake.

 

“Where are Uncle Jacob and Auntie Stacy?” Pieter asked.
Hermione began to wonder if she should just assume every black-haired sarcastic
wizard was related to Severus.

 

“Just missed them,” said Severus. “If you wanted to see them
you should have been here last night. It would look suspicious if you just
showed up in the afternoon as they were leaving.”

 

“I’d say I was taking an afternoon off and taking you
fishing,” Pieter said in thickly accented English, pouring himself a cup of
tea. “They would believe that.”

 

“Quite true,” said Severus thoughtfully. “What are you doing
Saturday?”

 

“Fishing with you,” said Pieter, not looking at him, but
smiling at Hermione. “Do you fish, young lady?”

 

“Depends on where it’s from,” said Hermione thinking of the
perch outside her window.

 

“You do not like the ledge at Hogwarts?” boomed Pieter
laughing heartily. “It does have the tendency to put one off the first time,
but there are fine fish in the lake.”

 

“The place we go here is much more conventional,” said
Severus, putting a cake in front of Hermione. “There’s a lake on the grounds.
Father keeps it stocked.”

 

“Then I would very much enjoy it,” said Hermione politely.

 

“What a partner,” Pieter said smiling at Hermione. “She is
smart and she likes to fish. Could such a vision be more perfect?” He reached
out and put a gentle kiss on the back of her hand, his blue eyes never leaving
hers.

 

Hermione’s cheeks felt warm. No one had ever talked to her
like that. No one had ever looked at her like that.

 

Severus suddenly found his mind full of homicidal thoughts
involving his cousin.

 

“So how is Anna?” said Severus. To his annoyance his voice
seemed a bit high and he thought it cracked slightly.

 

“Wonderful,” said Pieter smiling widely. “We are expecting a
child again!”

 

“Good God man, get a hobby!” exclaimed Severus, reaching out
to shake Pieter’s hand. “What is it now, three?”

 

“This is the fourth,” said Pieter proudly. “I hope this one
is a boy. Then we will have two of each.”

 

“Congratulations,” said Hermione. “When will the baby be
here?”

 

“Actually, any day now,” Pieter admitted. “Anna says it has
moved in the right way and we will see them soon.”

 

“Should you be away from home?” asked Hermione.

 

“No,” said Pieter. “I have a coin enchanted to vibrate when
it is time. I can apperate to her in the blink of an eye.”

 

“Should be used to it by now,” said Severus smirking into
his cup of tea.

 

“When are you going to find a woman good enough for you,
Severus?” asked Pieter. “Your house should be full of little shrieking voices.
You would be amazed how relaxing it is.”

 

“I have an entire school full of children,” said Severus,
glancing at Hermione. “That’s relaxing enough.”

 

“You never know,” Pieter said his eyes twinkling. “After
your mission is over you may decide not to bother with a divorce.”

 

Hermione and Severus felt their cheeks burn. Severus reached
out to refill his teacup. Hermione took a bite of her cake. They avoided each
others gaze like their lives depended on it.

 

Pieter inwardly shook his head. That Shacklebolt fellow was
right. These two had it bad. This was pathetic. Something had to be done.

 

“You will dine with us tonight!” said Pieter. “I will bring
the documents Albus wants you to look over. Anna would love to see you.”

 

“That would be wonderful,” said Hermione before Severus
could say no. “We’ll look forward to it.”

 

Severus shook his head slightly into his teacup as he took a
sip. Pieter was planning something. It made him nervous.