Down On Your Knees

Tile: Down on Your Knees

Author: Exis* Exis@chorus.net

Pairing: Harry Potter/Severus Snape

Warnings: This fic will contain M/M sex....Gay sex. For those who don\'t like that, you should go away now. It will also highlight a love affair with a teacher so if that makes you unhappy, scram. I haven\'t finished writing it, but you should assume that it will have spoilers from ALL FOUR BOOKS.....if that displeases you, you can go away as well. My last warning is that this is my virgin slash fic, and my virgin Harry Potter fic. I haven\'t the slightest clue whether it\'s horrible, and I\'d like to pretend it\'s not....

Disclaimer: I don\'t own the characters, nor am I making any money off this. You know the drill, I won\'t elaborate.

Dedicated: To my Lovely Beta Tealish. Thanks for your patience, and your trust. And also to ALL THE RAVENCLAWS OUT THERE.......the greatest hero\'s go unnoticed...and also to the people who put me on their favorites list.....this is for you.......

Archive: Anywhere you want to....just mail me to let me know.

You\'re the one who makes me come running
You\'re the sun who makes me shine
When you\'re around I\'m always laughing
I want to make you mine
I close my eyes
And see you before me
Think I would die
If you were to ignore me
A fool could see
Just how much I adore you
I get down on my knees
I do anything for you

Chapter 17 \"The sun that makes me shine\"

The long flat plateau stretched out for what seemed like miles. He stood on the edge, his toes just touching the strange green vine that snaked its way along the castle wall, despite the snow. Harry exhaled one crystalline breath and watched it float along the stark blue backdrop and disappear into the stars. Everything seemed distilled for some reason, and the colors ran together like he was trapped in a watercolor painting. The massive sky was such a change from the confining and twisting halls of the castle, it made Harry wonder when he had last just stopped and looked at the stars. Standing weightlessly, Harry stretched out his arms and let the cold wind conquer his lungs. The anti-gravity of the night snuggled him, and time whispered him all its secrets.

And as the stars blinked and the wind pushed gently, Harry was quietly reminded that no matter what the papers said, he was still just part of the earth. No better and no worse than anyone else. It reminded him that right now was just one tiny piece of time, and that the earth would revolve, with or without him on it. It felt so reassuring to be insignificant again, to just be part of the great big picture - to be just like everyone else.

“Thinking of jumping?” a voice behind him said, breaking the spell and causing Harry to jump around, almost losing his balance. The roof he was standing on was almost empty, aside from the occasional vine and the two men now standing on it. Harry’s eyes came back to focus, and there, leaning quietly against the wall, stood Severus, wrapped in his long black shroud, all but disappearing into the darkness. A thousand thoughts ripped through his mind, but none of them stayed long enough to make any sense. Dropping down from the defensive stance he had taken, Harry looked back quietly, unsure of how to answer.

“What are you doing up here?” he replied finally. His question played across the other man’s face. He had expected to be asked, but he was no more eager to answer. Severus gently shoved his hands into his pockets and walked with careless steps away from the wall.

“I should be asking you that,” he chided, and the corner of his cheeks shifted slightly. “I hope you aren’t harboring some silly notions that I have nothing better to do with my time than follow you around.” His eyes never left Harry’s, and Harry could feel the chills run down his spine. Harry said nothing, just stared back with the absolution of a man who hasn’t had his question answered. Some kind of a decision was reached between them, that they would stay away from each other. It was just too strange for Severus to be breaking it now.

“Quit looking at me as though I’ve sprouted leaves, Potter,” Snape said finally, ceasing his movement and standing still on the pavement. “I was previously under the impression that no one but I visited this portion of the castle, and when I discovered that someone else knew not only of it’s existence, but of this forgotten passageway, I thought it smart to consider what motives someone might have for being up here at this time of night.”

Harry let the long train of words soak into his mind. Why couldn’t the man ever just say what he meant? Sighing, Harry folded his arms across his chest. “So in other words, you’re just making sure I’m not performing dangerous ritual sacrifices up here?” His face smirked as he said the words, and he cocked his head ever so slightly in a challenging way.

“Don’t be dense,” Snape replied, but looked away casually, in what Harry thought was either disgust or embarrassment. But quickly his brain vetoed embarrassment and reasoned disgust. Slytherins were never embarrassed over something that small.

“Well, there’s nothing inappropriate taking place here, as you can see,” Harry said, waving his arms about to gesture into the open space. “So I won’t keep you...” Harry finished, looking towards the door and hoping with all his self that Severus didn’t use it, in spite of his words. Formalities must be upheld, regardless of how he felt.

“Just because you haven’t slaughtered any lambs yet doesn’t mean you won’t,” Severus said, almost inaudibly, letting the night wind catch most of his voice. Harry let go of the breath that he had been holding, and began to walk in tight, lazy circles. Silence fell between then, and while it comforted Severus, it unnerved Harry, and he felt a great need to break it as soon as possible.

“It’s cold out here,” he said finally, mentally cursing himself for how basic the phrase made him seem. Severus’s head moved suddenly, as he snapped out of his reverie and looked at Harry with a blank look.

“I don’t feel it anymore,” he said casually, and he gently dipped his hands into his pockets and pulled out a tiny glass vial that held a group of red roots in it. Extracting one, he placed it in the center of his hand. Closing his eyes, he pressed his magic up and around the root, and he opened them again to see the flames engulf it, seeping a cloud of heat around the two of them. Harry watched in fascination.

“It burns so clean,” Harry whispered, as the root was finally engulfed, leaving no tell tale ashes behind. Severus just gave Harry a predatory grin, as he looked at the expression in Harry’s eyes.

“It’s simple magic,” Severus said with a voice of superiority, his face still contorted with that look of quiet concentration.

“I know,” Harry answered, and looked up at the other man. “But sometimes the simplest things are the best.” Severus twitched at the innuendo towards their anything but simple situation, but Harry seemed not to notice. Instead he turned away, turning his head toward the endless sea of stars. Finally Harry sat down on the pavement, crossing his legs and keeping his eyes on the sky.

“So, are you going to tell me the real reason you came up here?” Harry asked, still not looking at the other man. Severus felt the heat run to his face, and he crossed his arms with purpose.

“No,” he answered slowly, surprising himself with his own candor. “No, I’m not going to tell you. Just like you’re not going to tell me why you’re in this forsaken castle instead of wasting time with your insolent friends.”

“Wasting time...” Harry echoed quietly. Severus felt his conviction fall, but recovered quickly, placing his carefully constructed mask back in place.

“Besides, you seem to operate without any reasons at all just fine. Why do you see fit to make me explain my reasons when you yourself are in a serious lack of them?” Severus felt himself smirk, though it was wasted, as Harry still wasn’t looking at him. It was much easier to say these things when he didn’t have those green eyes staring at him, making him want to implode to escape their strength.

“Because I know you,” came the quiet reply. “You never do anything without a reason.” Harry’s tone was calm and collected, almost sad. It’s hollow notes were enough to make Severus’s hairs stand on end, as though they themselves were dangerous. It was a strange feeling.

“You know nothing of the sort,” Severus sneered slowly in defiance. Harry laughed a little, and tipped his head back. He was filled with a strange elation that was totally inappropriate for the situation.

“How very like you,” were the little words that made their way out after the laughter. Harry seemed mellow and pensive, his eyes half-open and soft with the shadows of sleep. “But you’ve been a spy for too long.”

Severus fixed his gaze at the sitting hero, cocking his head with amusement, but all the while giving a gaze that declared boredom. If ever a dichotomy walked the earth, it was Severus Snape.

“What, pray tell, do you mean by that?” he asked, his words biting and his tone sharp. Harry leaned his head slightly, as if he was thinking about something that comforted him.

“You’ve been keeping secrets so well for so long, you think no one knows you anymore. I admit, you are pretty easy to take at face value, but really that’s what makes you such a good spy.” Harry said these words warmly and turned to face the man. “But I’ve spent a lot of years watching you, and I guess cracked the code after a while.” Severus scoffed, crossing his arms a little tighter.

“It’s all in the little things,” Harry continued. “Where you put your hands, how you phrase your sentences; stuff most people don’t pay attention to. But it’s there.” Harry smiled a little, looking particularly boyish and happy. Snape, however, looked displeased, and at that moment took extreme care at placing his hands in a neutral position as if he was guarding some great secret and he was worried Harry might be discovering it as they spoke.

“And what does this have to do with anything?” Snape asked levelly, keeping himself void of anything that he thought might give away his emotions, though he wasn’t exactly sure what he was hiding. Decoding people was his job, and the thought of someone using his own tricks against him made him nervous.

“Nothing, really,” Harry answered, as if he expected more of a reaction from his disclosure. “You just said I didn’t understand you, and I’m saying I know more than you think.”

Severus stopped and narrowed his eyes a little. Looking unimpressed, he squared his shoulders and the lapels of his robes fell open slightly. His face was relaxed, but you could see the tension hidden underneath.

“So what,” he countered, sounding more childlike than he had intended to sound. “Name one Gryffindor that doesn’t wear their heart on their sleeve. So you’ve cracked this supposed code; congratulations. It still means nothing.” His final words were quiet and heavy. There was conviction in his voice that wasn’t in his heart. The amusement that was present in Harry’s features before suddenly disappeared and left seriousness in its place.

“Maybe,” Harry said sadly, as if some calming bubble had been burst. Truth ran through the Gryffindor’s veins, and some gumption that he didn’t know he had welled up inside of him. Lines of frustration creased across his forehead, and he looked up at Severus and jumped to his feet. “But if this is nothing, why are you standing here?” Emotions weaved their way inside his voice.

“If all this didn’t mean anything, why have you been avoiding me since September? Why does Remus look at us as though something is going to explode every time we’re in the same room? Shouldn’t we have forgotten all about this and gotten on with our lives like this didn’t happen if it meant nothing?” Harry’s voice was mounting with anger, and his steps drew him closer and closer to Severus.

“Maybe I’m wrong,” Harry said quietly, now standing alarmingly close to Snape. “But if this is nothing, why are you still standing here? It only takes one person to walk away, and in case you haven’t guessed, it won’t be me. So why are we up here? Why do we say everything but what we mean? Why haven’t you walked away?” All the conviction he had started his speech with was gone, and in that moment he felt almost powerless. His eyes were weighted down with questions, and narrowed with trepidation, and he raised his head toward Severus’s. With all the elegance of a questioning toddler, he stared at the man who had been the focal point of his thoughts for what seemed like forever. “Is this nothing?” he finally asked, and when no answer came, he dropped his eyes.

Severus stood frozen. All the right words ran circles around his brain. This was the perfect time to kill the foolish boy’s hope. A few carefully chosen phrases and a week or so of ignoring the boy and this would be forgotten about. He knew Harry had friends to nurse his broken heart, if you could even call it that. But the words wouldn’t land on his tongue. All he could do was stand there and look stunned. Scathing comments piled up by the thousands, but his body wouldn’t say them. His mind pushed and pulled, but his mouth wouldn’t cooperate. ‘Just say it!’ his brain screamed, but his heart stood defiant and refused. And in that moment, the impermeable wall he had constructed cracked and the truth ran through him.

“It’s everything...” Severus said quietly, watching the light return to Harry’s eyes “... and I hate it. But... I can’t walk away.” Severus felt the tension melt from him, and for the first time since the night Voldemort died, he felt a little peace. Harry looked wondrous, but soon confusion welled within him.

“But then why...” he started to ask, fishing for the answers that had been keeping him up at night. Severus cut him off before he could even answer his question.

“Because I thought it was best... It is best, I am just choosing to ignore it.” Severus then looked slowly down at the wondrous human who was no more than a foot away from him, and for the life of him he couldn’t remember any of the reasons he had fought so hard to stay away from him. Everything added up to this one person, and it wasn’t because of some trivial mistake or some idolic scar... It was because of him, and just him. Suddenly everything seemed rather funny. Here he was, a turncoat and a credit to his house, standing toe-to-toe with the Savior of the Wizarding World, to whom he was twenty-odd years older, and he was hopelessly intrigued. Fate had a cruel sense of humor.

Emotions played across Severus’s face like a candle’s shadow, and Harry stood puzzled, trying to decipher what all this meant. In that moment his body language was unreadable, and Harry couldn’t figure out what was really being said.

“So, what does all this mean?” Harry asked hopelessly, praying that he didn’t sound like a complete idiot. But instead of malice, Severus looked almost benevolent.

“It means you’ve won. I’d offer congratulations but they seem inappropriate,” he commented in a caustic voice. “I’m simply much to tired to fight you anymore. Though I do think I am a silly choice for a prize,” Snape added lightly, looking rather calm and almost happy in that strange little moment.

“Well, I disagree,” Harry added in the same mirthful tone. “I think you’re a perfect prize.” His eyes shined for a moment. “You’re brilliant, and witty. And I can’t leave out mysteriously alluring, and maybe the single sexiest creature on the planet,” Harry said genuinely.

“Flattery will get you nowhere,” Severus countered, crossing his arms and trying to look impressive. “However, you seem to have left a few things out of your list. Dangerous, self-destructive, manipulative, cold...” But Severus got no farther than that before what sounded like a very old bell ringed inside his cloak. His face creased with a frown, and he reaches inside his pocket and pulled out a silver pocket watch with two snakes engraved on the cover. Flipping it open, he smiled a flat smile and shoved it back inside to its original home. Reaching forward, he placed his hands on either side of Harry’s head and drew him forward, placing a sudden kiss on Harry’s lips and coaxing them apart with his own. Slowly, but passionately he kissed the boy breathless. Almost as soon as it had begun, it ended, and Severus let go and left Harry standing right where he had been a minute ago. Harry looked utterly confused, and thoroughly kissed. Severus smiled again, this time a little broader.

“It’s midnight,” he said bluntly. “I thought we’d celebrate in the traditional manner.” His smile widened a little more still. Harry said nothing in return, just looked at the enigma of a man he had gotten himself addicted to - an affliction from which he hoped never to recover. Gently, almost timidly, Harry stepped forward and placed his head on Severus’s shoulder. Letting a breath out, he fit his body against the taller man, and they came together like missing puzzle pieces. Severus snaked one of his hands up against Harry’s neck, and the other down to the base of his back. And for a minute, everything was perfect as they timed their breath together and shared a sliver of time.

But Harry was a Gryffindor, and in the Gryffindor fashion of making things more complicated than they needed to be, he eventually raised his head and looked at the dark eyed man.

“So where do we go from here?” he asked, still pressed up against Severus, sharing his heat. Severus blinked. He hadn’t really thought that far in advance. In fact, in the last five minutes, he had totally obliterated every plan he had ever made involving the person pressed against him. Reality came crashing down on him, and once again the thousand reasons ran their rhetoric through his head. There were still godparents and reporters, friends and the other members of the staff to deal with, and while this tiny moment was perfect, he couldn’t say he predicted the same for the moments that would follow this one.

“Where would you like this to go?” he answered finally, sincerely interested in the answer. But, if he was expecting a practical, serious answer, he was wrong. Harry was no more than 18 and he had... other... things on his mind than what his friends would think.

“Well,” he whispered, “I would like this to lead straight into your bed,” Harry answered bluntly, not looking down. This was not what Severus had on his mind at all, but now that he mentioned it...

“Haven’t we learned anything about falling in bed together in the middle of the night?” Severus asked in a mock-authoritative tone, that in reality sounded a lot more serious than he intended it to.

“Absolutely not,” Harry replied, and his mouth twisted into a smirk. “I must be in need of another lesson.” That was all the invitation Snape needed. Pausing for a moment to look for any signs of uncertainty, he loosened his grip on Harry. Finding no signs of jest or nervousness, he let go completely and began walking back toward the building. When he realized he wasn’t being followed, he looked behind him to see Harry looking at him in a confused way. Then he remembered he was dealing with a Gryffindor and that he would need to spell things out.

“Are you coming?” he asked in a sharp voice. “I believe you asked for another lesson, and as I don’t believe in denying my students.”

It took Harry a moment to catch his meaning, but once he did he nearly ran to Severus’s side, more than willing to follow the man anywhere he might lead.

~*~

Harry’s heart was racing by the time he got to Severus’s rooms. Stepping in the doorway that Severus had already crossed, Harry’s eyes widened in remembrance. It had been a long time since he had been in these rooms, but being in them made Harry so calm; it was if he had lived there all his life. His eyes darted around, trying to soak the room up. He tilted his head around to examine his surroundings. The two times he had been in the room he had been either incredibly preoccupied or dazed with alcohol, but in that moment, he was more relaxed than he had been in months. Severus looked on with interest as Harry mentally cataloged his quarters. But, when Harry began to read through the titles on the great oak bookcase, Severus got a feeling he might never get him out of the sitting room if he didn’t intervene. He cleared his throat pointedly.

Harry shook awake, coming out of a daze. His eyes fell back into clear focus, and then fell on the dark, handsome man staring rather noticeably at him. He felt himself harden, as the reason for his visit here returned to his mind. His mouth hung open a little as Severus began working the first row of buttons of his cloak and shed his outer garment. Severus raised an eyebrow, looking over the needy creature that was staring at him. Harry had enough good sense to blush as Severus’s eyes combed his body. With his mouth curling into a smile, he began to walk toward Harry.

Taking a breath, Severus wondered silently why he was doing this, and where his resolve had gone. But the closer he got to Harry, the less he questioned. It was a fight worth losing, and once he had reached that conclusion, all his reasons became pale and distant. Everything led up to this, and who was he to fight fate? Especially when fate was looking at him with bright green eyes that just screamed “Take me!” Even if he wanted to argue, he didn’t think he could. Not anymore.

He lowered his lips to Harry’s ear lobe and caught it between them, sucking gently. Letting it go, he exhaled gently across it, sending a wave of chills through Harry. “You realize what we’re doing, don’t you?” he whispered gently, before trailing light kisses down Harry’s neck.

“Don’t care,” Harry answered shakily, tilting his head to give Severus better access. A noise of pure contentment followed, as Severus nipped at his collarbone.

“Do you realize what people are going to say when they find out?” he said again, returning his mouth to the man’s ear. “What your friends,” he placed a small kiss on the boy’s temple, “Your godparents,” then his cheek bone, “The papers,” and finally his lips, bringing his face right in front of Harry’s, “And the staff, are going to say when they find out that you. Are. Mine,” he said in a deadly quiet tone, before finally lowering his lips to Harry’s neck again and sucking harshly, leaving a mark that left no confusion that Harry was his. Harry’s eyes rolled backward and then shut as he tilted his head again and let out a strangled cry. Taking his hands and putting them on either side of Severus’ face, he brought the man’s eyes level with his own.

“I don’t care,” he said in a completely serious tone. “They can say whatever they feel like saying. I am done being their symbol. You are my choice, and screw everyone who doesn’t like it.” And giving Severus no time to contemplate, he brought their lips together in an electric kiss. Energy passed through them in waves, melding them together through their lips. No spell in the world compared to this magic, and Severus didn’t want to let go, even as his air supply grew smaller and smaller. Finally Harry broke away, his eyes gleaming at his stunned lover.

“Let me show you exactly how much I’m yours,” Harry said suggestively, pulling Severus down the corridor and into his bedroom. Severus followed easily, not protesting in the slightest. His brain was more lust-addled than he remembered it ever being, noticing everything Harry did. Things seemed to move in slow motion, and Harry looked so happy and he felt so good that Severus thought it must all be a dream. After all, good things like this didn’t happen to him. He should be fighting this, before he woke up to the cruel reality that it was just another illusion his mind had created.

But before he let himself get whisked away with his thoughts, Harry had his lips on his, kissing all doubts out of him. Moving a hand behind him to shut the door, Harry wrapped the other around Severus’s neck and pulled himself up against the taller man. Harry ended the kiss and looked up at Severus. He felt his dark eyes burrowing into him, filling him with emotions that seemed to well up in him until he felt like he would explode with the pressure. Severus’s eyes spoke of things that were dangerous, and things he could only begin to comprehend. In that moment, his eyes contained all words of love that would never cross his lips. It was that power, that intensity, that perfect combination of intellect and truth and desire that Severus held in his eyes that drove Harry wild. He might never understand why, but he craved it like an addict craves heroin, and no maudlin sentiments or happily-ever after could take its place.

With hesitation, Harry moved his hands up toward the top button of Severus’s robes. Leaning forward, he laid his head against his lover’s neck and kissed the flesh softly. “Your’s,” he whispered, almost too soft for anyone to hear, and his fingers began to undo the buttons and hooks. Severus’s hands fell in sync with Harry’s, and together they undid their outer robes and tunics. Severus slid his hands under Harry’s white tee shirt, moving them against his torso as he slid the garment up and over his head, dropping it carelessly on the floor. Harry felt his muscles contract in pleasure and he continued to work on the seemingly endless buttons that were keeping him from Severus’s skin.

Severus lowered his head to Harry’s shoulder and laid wet kisses along it. Harry moaned softly, and he could feel his body temperature rising. Undoing the last two buttons on the bottom of Severus’s oxford shirt, Harry’s hands slid the shirt apart and off his shoulders. It fell on the ground behind the taller man and the pale skin it had been concealing became apparent in the candlelight. Sliding his arms around Severus, their skin came in contact and heat seemed to explode between them. In that moment, Severus seemed to intensify, and he dipped his fingers into the waistband on Harry’s trousers and began to pull him with as he walked backwards toward the bed.

Falling against the bed with an elegance Harry was sure he’d never manage, Severus slid his hands up against Harry’s body, pulling him closer. Now sitting on the edge of the bed, he wrapped one hand around his waist and the other was entwined in Harry’s hair as he pulled Harry up onto his lap. Harry moved his legs to straddle Severus, and their lips met in frantic kisses. There had been too much time, and both were desperate to merge into one person as they had done months before.

With his arms still tight around him, Severus easily pinned Harry under him as he rolled back on the bed. Lifting himself slightly, his hands worked down his torso again, his fingers trailing down the line of hair that led beneath the waist of his pants. He dipped his mouth and ran his tongue over one of his nipples, as they that were screaming for attention. Pink and puckered, both visibly begged for Severus’s tongue, and Severus most happily obliged, bathing each one carefully and alternating till Harry was thrashing on the bed with want. “I want... please, god... mmmm, Sev...” spilled from Harry’s reddened, swollen lips as he attempted to beg for something beyond words.

Pulling himself onto his knees, Severus moved his body down Harry’s as his hands reached for the snap on Harry’s black pants. Undoing it with agonizing lack of speed, Harry whimpered and moved his head wildly. Moving his face down to the man’s still clothed crotch, he nuzzled the painful erection softly. Looking up at his lust-maddened lover, he smiled a wicked smile.

“Why, Mr. Potter,” he drawled, before his lips caught the zipped tab and yanked it down with his teeth. “You seem to be worked into quite a state,” he whispered, as his hands slid the trousers down his hips and onto the floor. Harry just moaned lightly as the pressure of the cloth that held his cock was lessened. Severus could clearly see exactly what a state Harry was in. His cock ached from being hard for what seemed like an impossibly long time.

“Shhhh,” Severus soothed with a wicked smile. “Patience, is a virtue,” he hummed as he inched Harry’s boxer shorts down. He made sure to gently kiss the skin he exposed. When he began to uncover his cock, he began to uncover a little more quickly, but he kept his lips away from Harry’s drooling member. Finally divesting the boy completely, he threw the black cotton shorts on the floor next to the rest of the discarded clothing, and he looked at the creature that lay gently in his bed.

The soft candlelight seemed to accent his tan perfectly, making him look like Adonis in its glow. His muscles were lean, but fit, giving him a linear frame, and in Severus’s opinion, no more beautiful creation had ever been seen. He remembered having thought that Lucius Malfoy was beautiful, especially in school, with his blond hair and long legs. But he was wrong, for Lucius was pale in comparison to Harry, and he had every intention to prove just how exquisite he considered the boy to be.

With impossible ease, he lifted his hand and called a familiar vial of lubricant to the bed. Unsnapping his pants, he removed both them and his underwear in one simple motion. Harry’s eyes got wide with excitement and fear, and his cock twitched on his taught stomach. Severus curled his fingers around the bottle and unscrewed the cap, pouring some of the perfect liquid on to his fingers. Harry squirmed on the bed, bending his legs to give Severus a better angle. He looked so wanton in that moment, arching into a touch that wasn’t there, that Severus couldn’t help but smirk. He kneeled between Harry’s legs and snuck one slicked finger toward his entrance. Applying gentle pressure, he wiggled his way through a tight ring of muscles. A curse fell from Harry’s tongue as he squirmed on the finger, pressing himself against it.

“A little... anxious, are we?” Severus cooed at Harry, stroking his prostate gently. Harry’s cock begged for attention, pulsing along with the desire Severus sent through his body. Severus let his other hand roam Harry’s body, teasing nipples and touching Harry’s perfect muscles lightly. However, his wandering hand vehemently avoided the weeping member pressed against the flat of Harry’s stomach. His fingers dipped around it, touching lightly, and wetting themselves on the trail of precome that lay glistening. Harry moaned in frustration, but instead of touch, he was rewarded with another finger. Stroking slow at first, and then gaining speed, Severus gently relaxed the muscles until they were pliant and pulsating.

Leaning himself over the shaking body in front of him, Severus covered Harry’s lips with his own, and placed a third finger within Harry. Timing himself perfectly, he rubbed his fingers over the swollen gland within Harry, and Harry squeaked within his mouth, as he kissed him hungrily. Sliding his fingers out of Harry, he let the lips he had taken as prisoners go, and slid himself down the trunk of his body. Harry’s hand reached for his needy cock, but Severus stopped it, earning a whine and a choked sob from the nerve wracked body below him.

Severus felt his pain, but did nothing to ease it. The desire that radiated off Harry was like a drug, and it made Severus’s already stiff cock ache with a need to be buried within Harry. Never one to deny himself, he placed both hands on Harry’s hips, drawing them up toward him. He guided the blunt tip of his cock toward the puckered opening, precome dribbling from him. Then he paused and waited for Harry to look at him. When those green eyes met his own, dark with desire, he began to push forward.

“Everything,” he affirmed in a whisper, and he bent himself forward, plunging into the boy.

“Oh, gods...” Harry panted, as spikes of pleasure-pain ran through him like ice and fire. Unsure of whether he wanted to fight against the intrusion or to move into it, Harry was content to wiggle underneath Severus’s hips that pinned him tightly to the bed. Severus was fighting every urge of his body not to pound into the boy until he came, but instead settled for slow shallow strokes, planting kisses all over the boy’s neck and shoulders. Harry groaned and ground his hips for more attention. His cock still lay abandoned on his stomach. Blinding arousal ran through him as he felt his lover move in and out of him, making them one whole person. Harry sat perched on the edge of something perfect, but Severus’s shallow strokes just kept him there, not letting him tumble over into the depths of pleasure.

Severus was nothing if not the model of self-control. No matter how much his body urged him, he made sure to keep his rhythm slow enough not to push Harry over the edge. Grazing his prostate occasionally, Severus kissed Harry’s flushed lips one more time. Then his hand snuck down to Harry’s cock. Harry almost screamed at the contact, but instead of gentle strokes, Severus’s hand reached down and circled the base. His hips quickened and his thrusts became forceful and long as he brought himself closer and closer to his peak. Harry was riding right along with him, but before anything could happen, Severus applied firm but gentle pressure, starving off the orgasm Harry was so desperate for. Thrusting once, twice, Severus came with a cry, his hand still tight around Harry keeping him from coming with him.

His orgasm subsided quickly, and he pulled himself gently from the quavering boy. Tears streamed down from the corners of his eyes, and his cock looked red and angry with denial. His body and hair was damp with sweat, and every muscle shook from frustration and exhaustion. Harry looked up at Severus with pleading eyes, asking for anything he could get. Severus just titled Harry’s head up for just once last kiss. Bringing their lips together in the softest, most gentle prayer, he leaned down and whispered, “You are everything...” and in a split second, he was perched between Harry’s legs, swallowing his cock whole.

It only took one long suck and a gentle hum to push Harry over the edge. With a scream from deep within Harry’s throat, already sore from begging, Harry pushed his hips up leaving the bed and spilled his seed down Severus’s throat. Everything inside him exploded. All the hurt, and waiting and pain and mystery and tension that had surrounded the whole affair transformed into blinding pleasure, and it rushed Harry all at once. His muscles totally dissolved and he began to spasm forcefully, leaving him a quavering mass of nerves. This was more powerful than anything he had ever done. It outdid magic and power and any other thing Harry could think of. Pleasure coursed through him, and in its wake it left peace. And once the waves of pleasure subsided, Harry fell back and closed his eyes, too tired to move.

~*~

“You know,” Severus said in a soft voice, “I do believe that you have never looked more lovely than you do at this very minute.” He brushed the hair out of Harry’s face and kissed his cheek gently. Sex usually softened his sharpness, and made him strangely affectionate. Besides, after what he had put the boy through, he had earned some affection. Harry opened his eyes softly and stared blankly at Severus. A mild wave of panic spread through Severus. Most people enjoyed what he had done, but there were occasionally people who didn’t. He was almost sure Harry had... but the way he was looking at him...?

But those fears got no further than that before Harry rolled on top of him and kissed him breathless. A big grin crossed his face, and he kissed Severus again, this time more gently.

“Marvelous,” Harry whispered. Severus got a smug look on his face, and smirked a little.

“I wanted to give you something to remember,” he said with the self-confidence he had lacked just seconds ago. Harry smiled softly.

“You do realize, though, that I will have to pay you back for this,” Harry said with the same smugness. Severus was surprised for a moment, but no longer. How could he think he had suddenly alienated an 18-year-old with a sex-drive stronger than his own?

“But of course,” Severus whispered suggestively. “Pay back is half the fun.” And with that, he turned them both on their sides, and he kissed Harry’s shoulder. Running his hand through Harry’s damp matted hair, he waved the other over the two of them. The cleaning charm he cast would due until morning when they could take a shower.

Harry turned behind him and grabbed the covers. Pulling them down, he and Severus both wormed their way beneath them. Harry felt more exhausted than he could ever remember feeling. He was sure he had used muscles that he had never used before, and he was getting the impression that he would be one very sore Gryffindor in the morning. But even the thought of the morning turned his stomach. What would happen when the sun rose and Severus was back to his sarcastic, snarky, evasive self? Would he kick him out of bed and claim this was all a mistake? Would he leave him another note? But as those thoughts ran through his head, he felt an arm snake around his waist and press his body against his lover’s. Gently, he turned around and looked at Severus, whose eyes were still open, barely. Severus, still subdued from the exhaustion of their exercises, looked at him softy. And in that moment, Harry knew he had no reason to fear the morning. This was a conscious decision, and he saw sincerity and acceptance in those eyes that had long been foreign. Harry placed his sore, swollen lips to Severus’s one last time, and then raised his head gently to blow out the bedside candles, and surrendered himself to sleep.