The Affair

Chapter 17: In Your Eyes







Those who restrain desire, do so because theirs is weak enough to be restrained.” - William Blake











Hermione had heard it said that the weeks surrounding the holidays were the most depressing. That more suicides were committed during that time than any other. She believed it. The holiday season had been one large disappointment for her. Her only bright point was the half hour when Lucius popped up on her back step bearing gifts.







How was it that being surrounded by family and friends made her feel sad and alone, but a surprise visit from a death eater had her feeling alive again? She glanced over her shoulder at the man lying face down on the sofa, his face buried in one of the throw pillows, a half empty bottle of whiskey still clutched in his hand and she felt cold, numb. She knew she still loved Ron, that would never, ever change, but was she still IN love with him?







She sighed; it was too early to be thinking so deeply. She slung her bag over her shoulder and activated the floo, stepping through into the Malfoy library. She breathed deeply of the comforting scent of wood and books and a smile graced her lips. She felt lighter, better just by being there. She had spent her entire holiday wishing to be in that library with Lucius. She pined for the long lunches, the conversation, and the walks outside. She longed for the easy companionship they had found, the friendship that seemed to keep both their heads above water. She couldn’t deny that her body longed for the feel of his touch.







She tried to fight what she was feeling, but while she knew it was wrong she couldn’t help it. For the first time in ages she had actually felt something and maybe she was being selfish, but she just didn’t want to give that up, she couldn’t. She deserved to be selfish for once. She tried to justify her feelings, her desire for Lucius and what he could do to her by telling herself that Ron was catting around, but she had no proof of that, still, he ignored her, he avoided her and practically pushed her into another man’s arms to have her needs met.







All excuses, flimsy ones at that but it did not change how she felt. Even the guilt wasn’t enough to keep her from walking towards those double doors between the library and his study with butterflies dancing in her stomach. She was taking a giant step into a raging inferno that couldn’t end well but she was powerless to stop herself from opening those doors.







He was standing near the window, his head bent over a parchment in his hand. His hair was tied back at his nape and he was casually clothed in a pair of loose black trousers and blue button down shirt. She loved seeing him like that, without the armor of his expensive robes. He looked far more approachable this way.







He looked up the moment he heard her enter, the parchment in his hands no longer important. She was standing in the doorway wearing a rather fetching brown dress that hugged her curves and tall brown boots, the brooch he had bought her pinned just above her left breast. He had to remind himself to breathe as the air rushed from his lungs.







“Hello, Lucius.” She said softly as she walked across the room to stand before him. She could read uncertainty in his eyes and she knew he was waiting for her to tell him where things stood between them. “I’m back.”







“I’m glad, I missed you.” He said quietly as he stared down at her.







“I missed you too.” She took that last step that brought them within an inch of each other and she heard his sharp intake of breath. “I can’t walk away.”







“Neither can I.” He dropped the parchment and laid his hands on her hips.







“We are so wrong.” Her hands slid up his chest and over his shoulders.







“I know, but I don’t care.” He pulled her flush against him and ducked his head into the side of her neck, inhaling the rich floral scent of her.







“It can’t end well.” She curled her arms around his neck, cupping the back of his head as he pressed soft little kisses just below her ear.







“It will be worth it.” He whispered, tickling her ear with the tip of his tongue.







“If they find out it will hurt them.” She moaned, her leg sliding up the outside of his to curl over his hip.







“When we are together, they don’t exist. It’s just us.” He gripped her thigh and groaned when she rubbed tantalizingly against the bulge in his trousers.







“We are going to hell for this.” She sighed, reaching for the buttons on his shirt.







“My place is already reserved.” His lips slid up her throat and along her jaw before closing over hers and claiming her mouth in a kiss. The moaned simultaneously as they came together, lips sliding against lips, tongues licking and mouths sucking. Lucius lifted her into his arms, her legs coming around his hips instinctively as he carried her to the low bench seat that stretched along the front of the window.







He sat slowly, her knees pressing into the cushions on either side of his hips. Their mouths remained fused as they tugged at each other’s clothing. Lucius’s shirt was tugged free from his waistband and Hermione’s dress was unzipped and pulled forward, her torso bared as his hands explored the smooth skin of her back. Long, impatient fingers plucked at the catch of her bra and Lucius sighed into her mouth when it finally released and he was able to slide the creamy lace garment off.







He pulled away from the kiss and admired her breasts. Full, rounded and tipped with dusky, tight nipples that made his mouth water with the need to suck. He cupped her, watching his thumb slide over that sweetly peaked tip, urging it to tighten further.







“I love it that you let me look at you.” He whispered, unable to stop staring at the beautifully aroused nipples pointing his direction, begging for his attention.







“I love it that you look at me. I love it that you see me.” She pulled the ribbon from his hair and smoothed her fingers through his hair before tugging his head close and pressing her nipple against his lips. He curled his tongue around the puckered nipple and suckled her into his mouth. “Oh god…I love it that you make me feel.” Her head dropped forward and she kissed the top of his head, she could smell the spicy scent that clung to his hair.







He sucked softly, his tongue sliding over and around the puckered nipple before he switched sides. He loved the affectionate way she kept kissing him and the way she stroked his hair as she rocked her pelvis against him. The heady scent of her arousal reached his nose and he nearly spilled in his trousers like a green boy.







“Damn it I can barely control myself with you.” He rasped when he pulled back and watched her wet nipple glisten in the dim winter light coming through the window.







“I don’t want you to.” She whispered harshly, her hands sliding down his chest through his open shirt and attacking his fly. “Lock the door.” She whimpered, opening his belt and pulling open the placket on his trousers. He didn’t wear underwear and she was very, very grateful for that fact as his cock sprung free and into the softness of her waiting palm.







He growled and flicked his fingers at the door as her hand stroked his shaft. Up and down the turgid length her little hand slid, sliding his foreskin back and forth over the sensitive tip. He knew it would be another flash fire moment between them and as much as he would like to actually make love to her he suspected that it would be awhile before they could come together with any sort of calm.







He pushed the dress up her thighs, bunching the material at her waist before tucking his fingers into the sides of her knickers and whispering a spell that rent the lace into easily discarded pieces. Her soft curls beckoned his fingers and he slid them through the springy little patch of fur before moving lower over the smooth skin of her folds and between the pouty lips to the wet, slick flesh of her core.







She was dripping wet and burning hot as his fingers burrowed into her heat. She moaned and started riding his fingers with little jerks of her hips as she stroked him faster. The sweet heady scent of her had him longing to bury his face between her thighs and sample her flavor.





“I need you, Lucius, now.” She held him firmly at the base and shifted her hips, sliding his fingers free before settling herself over him and slowly impaling herself on his erection. Inch by inch he slid inside her, the tight heat of her pussy like a smooth, wet glove closing over him.







“Incredible.” He groaned, his hands gripped her bottom tight as she began to rise and fall, sliding his cock in and out of her body. She took every inch of him, lifting until only the tip of him remained inside her then falling until her dark curls blended with his lighter ones. “That’s it…ride me…” He groaned, lifting his hips on her down stroke and grinding his cock into her.







“Oh….so good, Lucius!” Her head fell back, her hands clasped behind his neck as she began to roll her hips, her clit brushing his pelvis with every slow undulation. “More…don’t stop….please don’t stop….” She begged.





“Can’t….need you….need to come…” He growled, continuing to pump his cock up into her. He felt her tighten around him and he knew she was close, her nails digging into the back of his neck leaving tiny little bruises in the shape of crescent moons. He didn’t care; he wanted her to mark him. She let her head fall forward, her forehead resting against the top of his head, her hot little pants blowing in his face as her movements became urgent.





“I’m coming…oh god yes….Lucius.” Her eyelids fluttered and a low, hoarse moan slid past her lips as an intense orgasm caught her in its grip, wringing cry after cry from her as she convulsed around his invading member. He pushed through the intense, throbbing grip of her flesh until he joined her at the tail end of her own release, the hot, stinging spurt of his seed inside her triggering intense aftershocks that had her sobbing into his shoulder as she slumped over him, exhausted emotionally and physically.







Lucius held her tight, stroking her back as she drew several deep breaths. She kissed his neck, soft lingering pecks of her lips against the pounding pulse before lifting her head and looking him in the eye.







“No more regrets.” He kissed her lips. “No guilt, no recriminations. This is just us, Hermione. No one else exists when we are together.”







“No regrets.” She smiled softly and kissed him back. “You need to let me go, I need to clean up and get to work.”







“No need to rush, your boss will approve a longer break, I am certain of it.” He said. She chuckled and looked down at him.







“I have accepted that this…what is happening between us…its inevitable, but we can’t spend all of our time having sex, no one can know, Lucius, and that means I have to finish this project so people don’t question why I am here.” She said.







“You are right, I suppose, but you can’t blame a man for trying.” He said, wincing when she lifted her hips and his softening cock slipped free of her. “Know this though, one day very soon we are going to spend the day making love, slowly.”







“I look forward to it.” She smiled, brushing her lips against his before sliding from his lap to begin her day. She was a changed woman. Gone was the girl who always did the right things, always sacrificed herself for the sake of others. In her place was the woman who did what felt good, who took a chance to be selfish and have something for herself at the risk of others. The question was, why did it feel so good to do the wrong thing?















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And the affair kicks off in earnest…come on, you know you wouldn’t be able to resist him either, its Lucius! Though I have to say while I find Isaacs to be one of the sexiest men alive, its Lucius and Michael Caffee that make me squee, what’s sad is both characters are jerks….makes me wonder about myself…….







LaBib – My cousin’s baby died in utero a week before she was born, so the nursery was all set up and ready to go, I was about 7 at the time, well I used to spend summers with her in my teens and the baby’s room was still set up (she was never able to get pregnant again), everything was covered in dust and no one was allowed in, I snuck in once to have a nosey, when they moved from that house she didn’t pack that room…the new owners bought a house with a dead baby’s nursery left behind….unhealthy? Oh yes..she still carries a photo of the baby in her wallet, that baby would have just turned 25 had she lived…I find all aspects of psychology interesting, the brain is such an interesting ‘thing’ the way it processes emotion or doesn’t process it, the way it can just ‘break’ sometimes….its amazing. =)







Narcissas Sister – of course he must have his way! And any woman with eyes in her head will give it to him =)









Lala – Harry’s position will come clear shortly….let me just say that he is ‘looking in to things’ and doesn’t want to say anything until he knows for certain. But Harry will come into play here shortly and you wont hate him, I promise. =)







Voracious Reader – someone asked me recently about the fact that I don’t focus on magic in my stories….its used but not overly much. I guess I feel that while they have the ability it isn’t the sum of who they are. They still have lives and loves and all the drama that comes along with it and that’s the part that fascinates me =)







Smurphy - HI! So glad to see you on board!!!





Lexi – I am….honored that you were inspired to create something by something I wrote. The drawing is beautiful and I got teary I was so flattered. Thank you.







Rae – what a wonderful thing to say! Thank you so much!!!! I am so glad that you enjoy the stories. With all my writing, whether its fan fiction or original I want the women to be ‘real’. Its my biggest beef with celebrities and Hollywood, not enough ‘real’ women. Truth is that in my eyes, the woman in her old jeans and tee shirt chasing her kids through the grocery store with circles under her eyes, a little extra padding round the middle and a ragged ponytail because she didn’t have a chance to brush her hair is far more beautiful than an anorexic model or actress.