Meant to Be

Posting a couple of chappies today. Thanks for letting me know I posted twice yesterday. It was just so good I thought you\'d like to revisit it!



Chapter Seventeen



Jess avoided him the next day, until lunchtime when he knocked on her door. ‘Sorry, Jess,’ he said when she called him in. ‘But you said you’d do those visits with me today.’

She frowned for a second then remembered. ‘Yes, I did,’ she said, checking the time and standing up. ‘Sorry, Remus. It slipped my mind.’

Remus smiled and held out her coat. ‘First appointment is in about 45 minutes,’ he said. ‘But I thought I might take you to lunch first. Say thank you for thinking of me for the job.’

Jess shook her head. ‘You don’t need to do that,’ she began, but he stopped her.

‘I know,’ he said. ‘But I want to.’



He smiled and Jess sighed, annoyed that she still couldn’t resist his smile. ‘I’m not a cheap date,’ she warned and his smile broadened.

‘Worth every Knut,’ he murmured, holding up her coat and helping her pull it on. His hands rested on her shoulders and he kissed the back of her head.

‘Remus,’ she hissed, spinning around to check the door was shut. ‘You can’t do that. I’m your boss, and…we’re not even together. You can’t go around kissing….’



He stopped her by kissing her full on the lips. She tried half heartedly to push him away but he released her quickly with a grin.

‘Please tell me that this isn’t appropriate now,’ he teased, running his palms down the lapel of her coat. ‘I remember what happened last time we had that discussion.’

Jess flushed and tried to hide her amusement, and her arousal as his hands brushed over her breasts. Remus’ face went pink as well when he felt her nipples harden through the thin summer coat, and his own body reacted strongly.



He cleared his throat and took a step back. ‘If we want to make that appointment, we should get going,’ he said and Jess nodded.

They apparated out of the Ministry, having lunch in a Muggle bistro near St Mungos Hospital where their first client had been admitted. They talked, keeping things casual and light, knowing now was not the time to talk about their past. The appointment went well; the female client responding a little too well to Remus though, until she asked about his love life and he told her he had a girlfriend and a child. Jess tried to hide her smile as they walked out.



‘Stop it,’ he said, glaring at her as they walked down the stairs.

‘What?’ she said innocently. ‘I’m just wondering about this imaginary girlfriend…’

‘I had you in mind for that job actually,’ he said quickly, smiling when he saw her flush a little. She bit her lip to try and stop herself laughing and he shook his head.

‘Cut it out,’ he grumbled.

‘I’m not doing anything,’ she insisted. ‘I guess you just can’t help being irresistible.’

She lost her battle against the laughter rising in her and a giggle slipped out. Remus grinned then grabbed her arm, pulling her to him and kissing her hard, hands rising to hold her face. This time, their lips lingered for longer, the hard kiss softening as it did. They pulled away but Remus kept his hands on her face, his forehead resting against hers.



‘Would you have dinner with me tomorrow night? No Teddy. Just you and me. Like a proper date,’ he asked, stroking her cheek.

Jess took a deep breath, clenching the front of his coat tight in her fists. ‘I’d really like that,’ she whispered before she’d had a chance to think about it, and Remus let out the breath he was holding, kissing her again, quickly this time.

‘What do you know?’ he said teasingly. ‘I am irresistible.’

She laughed and shook her head, pushing at him. When he let her go, Jess tucked a lock of hair behind her ear nervously and turned to walk down the stairs.

‘So, um, where to from here?’ she asked, and Remus smiled.

‘Well, I’m hoping to get to second base next time…,’ laughing when she smacked him across the chest.

‘Your next appointment, Lupin,’ she said with a smile as they walked out of the hospital.



When they returned to the Ministry, Remus tracked down Arthur Weasley.

‘Hello, Remus,’ the man said with a smile. ‘How was your first couple of days?’

Remus sat in the vacant chair across from Arthur and said, ‘Good. Really good.’

He beamed and Arthur chuckled. ‘Good because of the job, or good because of Jessica Mather?’

Remus looked a little startled and Arthur’s smile broadened. ‘Harry has a big mouth,’ he said and the other man frowned.

‘I know I did the wrong thing back then, Arthur…’ he began but Arthur shook his head.

‘I do understand, Remus,’ he said. ‘And I’m not going to judge you for something you did five years ago with a consenting adult.’



Remus smiled and Arthur leaned back in his chair. ‘So, has the spark reignited?’ he asked and Remus laughed.

‘I don’t think it ever went out,’ he said quietly. ‘We are having dinner at my place tomorrow night, Arthur, and I was wondering if you and Molly would mind Teddy staying over at your house for the night?’

Arthur looked closely at Remus and nodded. ‘Teddy’s always welcome - you know that,’ he said. ‘Are you sure you want to start this up again? You broke up for a reason.’

‘It was my fault that we broke up, Arthur,’ Remus said firmly. ‘I didn’t tell her a lot of stuff I should have. We need time alone to talk about all the things I should have told her years ago. And a toddler isn’t really conducive to a conversation that may make or break a relationship.’

He sighed and smiled at the older man. ‘Look, I know this is quick, but I know Jess and I’ve loved her for a long time. If there’s any chance for us, Arthur, I’m going to grab it.’

He stood up and said, ‘Thank you for agreeing to have Teddy. I’ll bring him around in the afternoon.’



Arthur nodded and Remus made his way to the nursery to pick up his son, who greeted him with the funny hiss he’d picked up in the last couple of days.

‘Sss,’ he said, wriggling in his father’s arms, and pointing off into the distance.

‘You’d better not be a Slytherin,’ Remus muttered as they travelled in the elevator down to his department so he could collect his belongings.

Jess was talking to Martha when they walked in, Teddy beginning to struggle against his father in earnest when he saw her, frantically making the hissing noise.

‘You want to say hi to Jess?’ Remus asked, and Teddy said, ‘Sss.’

Jess saw them and smiled broadly. Remus put Teddy down and he ran to Jess, who crouched to meet him.



‘Hiya, Teddy,’ she said, laughing when the little boy threw himself at her. ‘Did you have a good day?’

Teddy hissed happily, his brown hair turning blue as he tapped his hand on Jess’ mouth again. Jess picked him up, settling him on her hip and Martha came forward, greeting Teddy, who suddenly became shy, nestling his face into Jess’ neck.

‘You’ve got a fan,’ Martha said, with a smile and a glance at Remus. ‘Like father, like son,’ she whispered, smiling when Jess glared at her.

‘Goodnight, Martha,’ she said pointedly and the other woman laughed.

‘Goodnight, Jessica,’ she said. ‘Good night, Teddy; Remus.’



Remus smiled as he joined them. ‘Night,’ he said, then looked at Jess.

‘Are we still on for tomorrow night?’ he asked, smiling at his son who was fiddling with the buttons on Jess’ shirt, impressed when he almost got one open. ‘Good job, Ted. A lot of grown men have trouble undoing buttons one handed.’

Jess narrowed her eyes at him then covered Teddy’s hand with hers and kissed it, handing him back to Remus.

‘Yeah, we’re still on,’ she confirmed and flushed when he grinned at her.

‘About seven o’clock?’ he said, moving closer to Jess as Teddy reached out for her again. Jess hugged the little boy and nodded, trying to pull herself out of his embrace.

‘See you later, Teddy,’ she said, surprised when he planted a sloppy kiss on her.



Remus was also taken aback. ‘He’s pretty selective with his kisses,’ he said, staring at Jess. ‘He‘s just like me - he only kisses the prettiest ladies.’ Jess laughed then looked surprised when Remus leant over to kiss her as well, hearing Teddy squeal as his lips met her cheek.

‘Ow!’ Remus exclaimed, as his son hit him on the face. He pulled away from Jess and Teddy hissed again.

‘I think he’s got a crush on you,’ Remus said, rubbing the side of his face.

Jess chuckled and kissed Teddy on the cheek. ‘My bodyguard, huh?’ she said and Teddy laughed.



Remus shook his head and picked up his son’s back pack. ‘Are you going home now?’ he asked.

‘No,’ Jess said, with a grimace. ‘Paperwork - it never ends.’

‘You work too hard,’ he complained and Jess laughed.

‘You sound like Kingsley,’ she said, turning to go into her office. Remus grabbed her hand and stopped her.

‘Don’t stay too late,’ he said softly. ‘You’ll wear yourself out.’ Jess smiled at him and he raised her hand to his mouth and kissed it lightly.

Teddy let out a sound that sounded very much like ‘No’ and hit Remus on the shoulder. Remus looked at him in surprise. ‘I think we’d better go before he beats me up,’ he said. ‘See you tomorrow, Jess.’



Late the next afternoon, Remus Flooed to The Burrow to drop Teddy off. The little boy sat on the floor while Remus and Molly talked, Molly trying to extract every detail about Jess out of him. He could tell Harry’s big mouth had managed to censure itself around Molly, who he suspected would never have been as understanding about the former teacher/student relationship as her husband had been.

‘Jess is quite a bit younger isn’t she?’ she asked, handing him a drink. Remus nodded. ‘Fifteen years,’ he admitted, shifting his hot tea when Teddy pulled himself up on his leg and hissed. ‘She’s about the same age as Tonks was. You’d like her, Molly.’

‘And she knows about Teddy?’ Molly asked. Remus looked at his son who was trying to climb up his leg now.

‘She’s met Teddy,’ he said, smiling down at the boy. ‘Molly, he went straight to her. He refuses to let me hold him if Jess is in the room.’

Teddy let out a yelp and said, ‘Esss,’, bouncing up and down.



Remus and Molly looked at him. ‘He’s been making that hissing noise for the last few days,’ he said,. ‘I keep meaning to tell the carers at work to move onto the next animal noise….‘ but Molly sat forward and called him.

‘Teddy, you like Jess?’ she said softly. Teddy grinned and hissed again. Molly smiled too. ‘Jess?’ she said again and Teddy repeated the sound.

‘He’s not hissing, Remus,’ Molly said with a smile. ‘He’s trying to say ‘Jess’.’

Teddy looked a bit exasperated now and frowned as he said, ‘Esss.’ Remus looked a little stunned and Molly stared at him.

‘I hope you’re sure about her, Remus,’ she said gently. ‘And make sure she feels the same about you. Because if it doesn‘t work out, it’s not just your heart that will be broken this time.’



Dinner was coming along when he heard a knock on his door. He called out for her to come in and turned when he heard footsteps, his breath exiting his lungs in a sharp exhalation.

‘God, Jess,’ he breathed. ‘You look gorgeous.’ She seemed a bit flustered but smiled. ‘Thanks,’ she said, flushing as she took her jacket off. Remus pulled himself together enough to take it off her and hang it up, trying to cool down his suddenly overheated body. She was wearing a flared skirt and low cut, tight shirt, a little makeup and her hair was loose and fell in waves to her shoulders. It was simple, but she looked beautiful.



When he returned to the kitchen, she was stirring the soup and Remus quickly took over. ‘What can I do?’ she asked. ’I’m a lot better cook now than I used to be,’ but he shook his head and smiled

‘You’re the guest,’ he insisted. ‘You don’t cook. If you want to do something, you can pour us a glass of mead and keep me company.’

Jess smiled and did just that, taking a sip from hers, then handing him a glass. ‘Thanks,’ he said, then leaned over to kiss her lightly on the cheek. She gave him a little smile when he pulled away, surprised by how comfortable the familiar gesture felt.

‘I’m glad you came tonight,’ he said and Jess nodded.

‘So am I,’ she said, running her finger along the edge of her glass.



They talked over dinner, Remus finally telling Jess all about his past - every detail, including his marriage to Tonks, her death and Teddy‘s birth. When the food was gone, they sat on the couch, and it was Jess’ turn to talk. She told him about what had happened since she left, about her marriage and divorce, and finally getting the job at the Ministry.

‘Kingsley has been a great support,’ she said. ‘I would’ve had a lot more trouble passing some of the new regulations with a different Minister in charge.’

‘And getting me hired,’ he said with a smile as he reached for her hand. Jess smiled and let him entwine their fingers.



He stared at their hands for a while and then looked up and said, ‘I never stopped loving you, Jess. I made room in my heart for Tonks, and I don’t regret our time together because it bought me Teddy. But you were always there. I told Tonks about you; told her that I still loved you and she understood.’

He bit his lip and looked at their hands again. ‘Do you want to try again, Jess?’ he asked softly. ‘Do you think there could be a future for us again?’



Jess looked at him, her eyes piercing. ‘It was only one thing that broke us up, Remus,’ she said. ‘Do you think you can trust me now?’

‘I knew I could trust you then,’ he said. ‘That’s the worst thing about all of this. I knew you wouldn’t betray me; I knew I could trust you. I just didn’t trust myself to be right about you.’



He stopped talking and shifted, still holding her hand but sitting on the edge of the couch now.

‘Jess, when it was just me, I could have taken the chance that you might change your mind about us after a few weeks. But it’s not just me now. Teddy and I are a package and I have to think about what’s best for him. I can’t bring women into his life that he’ll get attached to and then lose. He already likes you - he’s been trying to say your name since the day he met you. I’ve never seen him act the way he does with you.’

He swallowed hard and turned to look at her. ‘No matter how much I love you, Jess, you have to be willing to make this long term; to be in this for the long haul; to accept Teddy into your life. If you can’t commit to that, then the decision has been made for us.’



Jess was staring at him, a strange look on her face. He opened his mouth to ask her what was wrong when she leaned over and kissed him, grasping his face in her hands. Remus was surprised but didn’t attempt to resist her, kissing her back.

‘Did you know that a man who is a good father is a hell of a turn on?’ she asked when she lifted her lips off his, kissing his jaw. He grinned and sighed as her mouth moved to kiss the skin under his chin.

‘Is that a yes?’ he asked, his hands moving to cup her head. ‘You want to give it another try?’

Jess smiled and nodded. ‘I do,’ she said and Remus smiled broadly, pulling her in for another kiss. She let it linger for a few minutes then pulled away when she felt her mind closing down.



‘Remus,’ she gasped as his mouth latched onto her neck. ‘Stop.’

He moved away, looking confused. ‘What’s wrong?’ he asked and Jess stood up, smoothing her hair.

‘I think we should take this slower,’ she said, her body screaming at her to shut up. ‘I….I can’t believe I’m going to say this….but I think we should wait to…sleep together. You know - like a normal relationship.’



Remus looked like she’d smacked him in the face and Jess giggled. ‘It won’t be that bad,’ she promised him. ‘And it won’t be forever. Just until Teddy’s used to me being around, and we’re certain that this has got the legs to go all the way.’

It was true, but there was something else. She could sense the ghost of his late wife in the house, and it made her uncomfortable to think about making love to him in the same house, the same bed, that he had slept with the mother of his child. Jess was hoping that, with time, the feeling would pass, but for right now it felt wrong to do it.



Remus seemed to have recovered his voice and said, ‘So, when you say we shouldn’t sleep together….do you mean spend the night, or do you actually mean we can’t have sex…?’

She sat down next to him and made a face, biting her lip and laughing softly when he groaned.

‘I was afraid that’s what you meant,’ he said then quickly moved over her, pushing her back onto the couch.

‘Can we fool around?’ he asked, kissing her cheek. Jess nodded and Remus smiled. ‘Exactly where is the line?’ he said, moving his mouth to her chin. ‘There’s never been one before.’

‘Um..,’ she said, distracted by his lips brushing over her skin. ‘Above the clothes stuff only?’



She heard him swear softly and smiled. ‘Just for a while,’ she assured him. ‘A couple of weeks, then we can review it.’

‘Review it?’ he said with a chuckle. ‘You’ve got the Ministry talk down.’ His hand slid down to her hip, pressing her against him.

‘Above the clothes, huh?’ he said, lifting his head and looking down at her. ‘You realise that I’m going to take that as a challenge?’

Jess laughed and he smiled, stroking a finger down her face. ‘I’ve waited a long time to be back in your arms, honey. I’ll wait as long as you want. But I’m warning you now, Jessica Mather, that I finish what I start. I asked you to marry me five years ago, and I intend on making good on that.’

She wrapped her arms around his neck. ‘I love a man that keeps his promises,’ she murmured before his lips came down on hers.



An hour later, Remus sat up abruptly, breathing heavily. ‘Alright,’ he said, standing up. ‘That’s it. I can’t take any more.’

Jess sat up as well and straightened her shirt. ‘I think that’s me done for the night as well,’ she said, clearing her throat.

Remus took some deep breaths and then grabbed her hands, pulling her to her feet. ‘Want some more dessert?’ he asked and Jess smiled.

‘Sweets instead of sex, huh?’ she said but she followed him to the kitchen. They sat at the table, Remus pulling Jess into his lap, insisting on feeding her ice cream, then unable to resist kissing her lips to taste it.

Eventually, the ice cream was forgotten and Jess shifted, straddling him as they made out, the kiss getting hotter and more urgent until they were rubbing up against each other desperately.



‘Jess, how firm is that line?’ he asked, his fingers biting into her ass as she ground against him.

‘It’s more of a guideline,’ she gasped. ‘Maybe some under the clothes stuff would be fine.’

‘Thank god,’ he said, yanking her skirt up to her waist before she could change her mind.

‘Hands only,’ she warned, then gasped as his hand found its way into her underwear. ‘That’s all I’ll need, Jess,’ he murmured then stroked her as his fingers sank into her. ‘Fuck!’ she swore into his neck, only taking seconds to climax, her fingernails digging into his shoulders as she fell into shaking spasms.

Her breathing slowed and she became aware of Remus’ hand between them, undoing his fly. She chuckled at his impatience then pushed his hand out of the way, moving hers firm and fast and within a minute he was arching up, crying out into her mouth as he kissed her hard.



‘Not exactly what I had in mind for tonight,’ he said several minutes later after they cleaned up. ‘But pretty damn good anyway.’

Jess laughed and pulled on her coat. ‘Do you have to go?’ Remus asked, putting his arms around her.

‘Yeah, I think so,’ she replied. ‘The line has already been overstepped once tonight. If I stay, I think the chances are high it’ll happen again.’

She kissed him gently and he hugged her to him. ‘This feels so right, Jess,’ he said softly into her hair.

Jess smiled into his chest, and said, ‘It really does, doesn’t it?’

She looked up at him and he smiled down at her. ‘I love you, Remus,’ she said quietly. His smile widened and he ran his hands over her hair, kissing her again. ‘I love you too, Jess.’