A Thief to Catch a Thief; a Death Eater to Catch a

December: Before the revealing.



Kayos fell upon the Spear and Arrow, they had agreed to host the “revealing”, and provide a buffet free of charge; 20% of all beverage profits from the day would go to Saint Mungos.



“Oh, where can I get one of those?” swooned one of the waitresses, hanging the larger-than-life-sized poster of Lucius Malfoy behind the little table he would sit at to autograph the calendars. It was ten sickles per autograph.



“Oh, I wouldn’t mind him…” said another hanging the poster of Harry. Harry had posed as Aries, and lay nude on a sheepskin rug, his hands covering his privates as candlelight flickered over his tanned body. Harry evidently sunbathed nude – the only white marks were under his wedding ring (hidden by other fingers) and under his watch (which he only removed to bathe). A toy ram, ewe and lamb were placed at his feet – the small soft toys stolen from Jess’s large toy sheep collection… nobody knew why Jess collected cuddly sheep – but she did.



“Give me those two any day…” sighed another gesturing to the twins, whom (of course) had posed naked for Gemini; their male anatomy barely hidden by pot plants. Though, choosing Devil’s Snare for the plant had proven dangerous, one plant taking a liking to Steve’s wiry pubic hair and wrapping tendrils in it – they’d had to snip off chunks of hair with scissors to part the plant from the person.



“Together, or separate.” Joked another, looking with pride as Hermione’s poster was hung. That woman was a boost to all things feminine.



“Who cares?!” giggled the twin’s fan – stepping back to make sure the poster was straight.



“Isn’t she pretty!” said the first waitress, unrolling the poster of Jess, who’d posed as Virgo. She’d worn her favourite negligee for the occasion; it was wonderfully sensual, dropping in a fall of light silk to her ankles, a slit to her pelvis on the right side. The back and front dropped dangerously low, the back brushing the curves of her rear; the front revealing glimpses of large, rounded breasts. The ivory silk was embroidered with beautiful autumn leaves, glistening as the light caught the bronze and gold threads.



“Oh wow! I wonder where she got that nightdress? I’d love one of those!” exclaimed another waitress, bringing in chairs for the aurors to sit on behind the tables.



“Yeah – its so sensual, its not sexy – but it makes her look stunning.” Said the twin’s fan.



“I don’t know who I’d rather be – Scorpio or Virgo?” asked Harry’s fan, looking thoughtful.



“Mmm… Virgo – my husband would die of shock if he came to bed and I was dressed like Scorpio! Is it still murder if he looks at your underwear and has a heart attack?” said the twin’s fan, giggling.



“It wouldn’t stand up with the Wizangamot.” Commented the manager, pleased with the waitress’s work and organisation. “There’s been a development – Scorpio and Virgo have agreed to auction their outfits this afternoon too – they’re in the garment box, with two shrunken tailor’s dummies; I’ll trust you ladies to set it up, and ward them against dirt and thieves.”



“Sure boss.” Said Harry’s fan gently unpacking the nightdress, “Oh! I’d love to have a figure that would fit this! I lost my hourglass when the children came along… maybe I should join that gym the aurors made?” she said, suddenly longing for the waist she used to have twelve years ago.



“I’ll join you in that – I’m getting a bit wide around the middle.” Said another woman, moving a dummy to position and enlarging it. “Come on, lets dress this dummy, though – we’ll have to enlarge the boobs on it to fill out the silk.”



***



“Are you sure you think you’re fit enough to go?” Hermione asked, looking at a still pale Lucius. His voice was gravely and rasping, and he was still drinking cough medicine; but had finished with the antibiotics. However, he was still incredibly weak, much to his frustration.



“Yes – I think I’ll manage.” He growled, it was meant to sound indifferent, but came out more like he’d swapped voice boxes with a tiger.



“I feel a bit sad – that’s my favourite nightie. It’s the one I wear to cheer myself up. You know, on bad days when I don’t feel too confident in myself; it makes me feel special and confident to wear it… even if all I do is sleep in it.” Jess said, running her hands through her long hair and checking her makeup in the mirror.



“Its for a good cause.” Lucius rumbled.



“When was the last time you wore it for yourself?” Hermione asked.



“Oooh – let me think… before I started seeing Draco.” Jess answered, not sure what Hermione was getting at.



“Exactly – its been months! Your self confidence is back where it should be, you don’t need an item of clothing to make you feel special when you’ve got your handsome other half to do it for you!” Hermione said, pointing out something that was obvious – but not obvious to Jess.



“Not that Draco likes me wearing anything in bed – he sulks even if I’m in my knickers!” Jess said, shaking her head.



“I’m not sure I needed to know that.” Lucius rasped, looking slightly horrified.



“Aww – I bet he hates those nasty knickers.” Hermione said, her voice dripping sarcasm.



“Yeah – they’re a clear warning: Back off, shut the fuck up and provide chocolate.” Jess smirked. Draco had never lived in such close proximity to a menstruating woman, and he really didn’t like the unstable mood swings and the fact he didn’t see a scrap of pleasure (that wasn’t from his own hand) for a week.



“And on that note – we’re changing the subject and leaving.” Lucius growled, moving to the fireplace to floo to the Spear and Arrow.



***



“This is fantastic!” sobbed the matron of one of the wards at saint Mungo’s, “They’re queuing all up the street and around the corner to get in and buy calendars!” She held a fully autographed one to her chest, it had been given to her free of charge by Hermione.



“We should raise enough money to get you out of the red and into the black.” Lucius gravelled, coughing slightly.



“You don’t sound too healthy, dearie, do you want me to take a look?” she said, giving Lucius a look that clearly said she wasn’t going to take no for an answer.



“My family healer said I was on the mend – it’s just a sore throat now.” He said as she began performing diagnosis charms, regardless of his consent for her to do so.



“You’ve been dreadfully poorly, haven’t you, dearie… but yes, your body is well on the way to being back to normal – but I’d take the auror work steady, its going to take months to fully put right all the damage done by the illness. Don’t do too much too soon.” She said, patting him on the back as he began to cough again.



“Sheep!” Ginny squealed, pointing at Harry’s poster.



“Yeah, Bah, humbug and Scrooge made an appearance.” Jess said. It had taken some convincing, but she’d let the toys go up for auction too. Jess loved her sheep more than the nightie – but there simply wasn’t room for ninety sheep in Draco’s suite. She’d be officially moving into Malfoy Manor in January. Draco was letting her bring ten sheep – no more.



“How much for the ewe?” Ginny asked, looking at the toy sheep pretending to munch on the wool grass in its mouth.



“Is it sheep or sheeps?” Dave asked, picking up the toy Ginny was interested in and watching it ‘chew’ the ‘grass’.



“Sheep.” Lucius growled, “Mrs. Potter, why do you want a toy sheep?”



“Well…” she began, waiting as Harry returned from the gents, “I thought it would look good in the nursery…” she trailed off, smiling sheepishly.



“Oh, for Charlie and Sorina’s youngest?” Harry said, he hadn’t seen Charlie and his wife for a while, but their son was heading on for six months old – and just like his Daddy, loved dragons. Their daughter was two, and preferred to sit in the bushes and talk to the fairies, Her mother was a herbologist and potions maker, specialised in Dragon medicine.



“Erm… no… but you’re going to have to clear one of the spare rooms…” she said, drawing his arms around her middle as he stood behind her.



“Why? Are your parents coming to stay for the weekend?” he said scratching his head.



“Potter – if balls were brains, you’d be a eunuch.” Lucius gasped, his laughter lapsing into a coughing fit that made him sit down.



“No – erm, but you do have about seven and a half months to redecorate it… into a nursery.” She prompted.



“Eh? Why?” Harry said, looking at his wife as if she’d suddenly sprouted tentacles from her ears.



“Harry – sometimes you’re rather thick.” Hermione said, giggling as Ginny looked mortified at Harry’s utter inability of taking a hint.



“Harry – You. Me. Baby. Seven and a half months to go.” Ginny said, slowly.



“You’re pregnant?” he whispered, his eyes wide, a beaming smile on his lips.



“Give the lad a medal.” Lucius said, shaking his head.



“I’m gonna be a Da…” Harry didn’t finish his sentence, hitting the floor in a dead faint before the last two syllables could leave his mouth.



“Trolls, Death Eaters, Dragons, Merpeople, Dark Lords, Lawbreakers… he faces them without flinching and battering an eye lid – tell him something wonderful and he faints!” Ginny complained, declining the coffee offered to her by a waitress.



“Oh! I think I can give you a better sheep than Bah! I have my first sheep at home – its safe for babies… it was the sheep that started my collection off.” Jess said, smiling.



“You don’t have to give up the first sheep.” Ginny said hugging the other woman.



“No, but I am doing.” She said, accepting the offered coffee; then watching as a suddenly green Ginny dashed in the direction of the lavatory. “I think we need to keep coffee away from her.”



“I’m going to be a Daddy.” Harry said from the floor, looking rather dazed.



“Yep – we all worked it out before you did, mate.” Dave said offering his arm to help him up.



“I’m going to be a Daddy.” Harry whispered, grinning from ear to ear.



“Yeah – you can babysit Tara for a night and practice changing nappies.” Said Steve, digging Harry in the ribs with a sharp elbow.



“I don’t want to mess this up – but I don’t know how to be a Father – I never had one to take examples from.” Harry muttered, suddenly looking perplexed.



“Well, don’t look at me! I made a royal mess of it!” Lucius grumbled, screwing up his face as he swallowed more cough syrup.



“Well – you know what not to do, so we can work from there – we have my parents to look up to for help and advice.” Ginny said, having returned from the ladies, popping a mint into her mouth.



“Ladies and gentlemen – can we have the calendar models sat in front of their posters, pens poised and ready to sign?” the manager called out. The aurors took their seats, swapping pens with each other until they found a colour they liked.



“Can I have the pink one?” Jess said, battering her eyelashes at Kingsley.



“Yeah – who’s got the blue?” he said, throwing the pink pen to Jess.



“Mine.” Lucius rasped, not prepared to share.



“I have green, but I’d be happier with purple.” Hermione said, throwing the green pen at a penless Kingsley.



“We haven’t got one. Or two.” Chorused the twins.



The manager left the aurors squabbling over stationary – he’d put out thirteen pens – there were enough to go around. He opened the doors to the rush of fans who were purchasing calendars at the door from off duty healers and George Weasley.





The matron looked on with tears in her eyes – Saint Mungo’s was safe for a while, if the money going into buckets was saying anything.