ENIGMA

Plot, new characters, new magical terms and abilities etc. are my intellectual property. If you want to borrow then please kindly ask. JK Rowling's characters and Wizarding Universe are all uniquely hers.

Summary: AU: What if everything we ever read in JK Rowling’s books was real – including the people characterised? What would you do if you found yourself caught up in that reality knowing what was to come? SS, RL, OC

Authors Note: It has been mentioned in the story but now I am noting it here. I am a fan of Diana Gabaldon’s ‘Outlander’/’Cross Stitch’ series and definitely was influenced by that in writing this story – i.e. the Standing Stones and traveling through time. But I also love Philip Pullman’s ‘His Dark Materials’ series and the tv programme ‘Sliders’ and the alternate universes alongside ours idea comes from there no doubt.

Fantasy/Drama

This story is rated R/M.

ENIGMA

Chapter 017: Just Let The Sun

Dumbledore sat in his office lost in thought, trying to convince himself that he’d done the right thing in not revealing all that Jessica had told him to Snape. Still, he wondered if she really had told him absolutely everything. It did not matter really; if he were in her shoes he would probably exercise great restraint himself. Everyone needed to be free to act as they saw fit whatever the situation. There was nothing to say for sure that all of the events that Jessica knew of from her world would come to pass as she might expect in this one.

The Headmaster’s mind turned once again to his Potions Master. He trusted Severus Snape, he trusted him implicitly. He relied on Snape in a way that just was not possible with anyone else. They were not bosom buddies or even the best of friends; they never had been and never would be – there was a line Severus would not cross with him. He always remained distant, quite formal even when the situation did not warrant it. But trust was there nonetheless.

For all that Dumbledore knew about Snape there were bound to be some things he did not know. But one thing he was most certain of – Snape’s loyalties and where they truly lay. He leaned back in his chair and touched his fingers together repeatedly in a steeple-like motion as he turned it over and over in his mind.

Dumbledore’s eyes wandered over towards the window which faced the direction of the Astronomy Tower. No, he had done the right thing in withholding certain facts, he thought to himself. He knew Severus well enough to know that he would see no point in having yet another discussion with Jessica over things they had no control over. The same could be said for Jessica. She had resigned herself to her predicament and was doing her best to come to terms with her new life although the situation with the Dementors seemed to have taken some of the sparkle from her for the moment. It had affected all who witnessed it and even Snape was not as unscathed by the experience as some might have thought.

The aged wizard let out a weary sigh and looked over at the perch where his Phoenix lay peacefully. “At least they have each other,” he said softly as his mind wandered to a time in his own youthful bloom that had seemed fragrant with possibility.

“Funny how the young always seem to think they have cornered the market on time…”.

xxxXXXxxx

There was the pounding pitter-patter of hard rain and then the gentle click of a window being closed. A whooshing sound echoed as the curtains were adjusted slightly to let in the faint light of the overcast day outside. Jessica opened her eyes and continued to lay quietly on her side as she looked over at the man she still knew very little about. She knew no more now about Severus Snape and his true loyalty than when she’d first stumbled into the wizarding world. A man that many despised and less than a handful even tolerated, truth be told.

And she was having his child.

Now he knew the truth; her truth, the missing piece of the puzzle that Lupin was frustrated to not be trusted with – or so she thought. It did not matter as such. It was too late to question how good or evil, how dark or light Hogwarts’ current Potions Master really was. She’d done the one thing she had promised herself she wouldn’t do ever again before her fateful move to Scotland: she’d fallen in love – truly, madly, deeply and utterly hopelessly in love – with no regrets.

In the days and weeks after the horror of the Dementors, Severus had tended to her every need. Though Jessica had physically recovered from her ordeal, emotionally she had not. The one who healed him was now wounded, and it frustrated him to no end that there was little he could do to repair the damage. The Potions Master had wanted the two of them to go away for a holiday so that Jessica could have a much-needed break in aid of her recovery. Dumbledore was apologetic and sympathetic to a degree, but Severus’ presence was sorely needed. Only he could make the Wolfsbane Potion for Lupin and there was the still not-so-small matter of Sirius Black and The Boy Who Lived.

And if that weren’t enough the incident Jessica remembered all too well from Book Three, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, was definitely upon them. Draco Malfoy had been injured by the Hippogriff Buckbeak in Hagrid’s Care of Magical Creatures class. Jessica would never forget it – she was there to witness it and still could not stop the arrogant and spoiled young Slytherin from disrespecting the creature and bringing about his own injury. Severus had told her himself that Lucius Malfoy filed a complaint with the Ministry of Magic and specifically requested that the animal be destroyed – and the Ministry was on the verge of making a decision from what she’d heard from Hagrid. That meant that the fateful night she feared above all others was drawing near: the truth of what happened to the Potters would be revealed when the real betrayer, Peter Pettigrew, escaped to rejoin Lord Voldemort.

She looked at Severus, angled sharply in the dreary light which made it seem more like late afternoon than morning. There was faint silvery scarring on his back and onetime youthful leanness was giving over to the thickness of his decided middle age. Still, his stomach was flat even with the broadening of his body.

She sighed faintly still not quite believing her reality, startling Severus and causing him to turn around from the window where he had stood brooding. In a few quick strides he was seated on the bed at her side. Jessica reached a hand down and rubbed her belly. She was showing now, but thanks to her love of oversized clothes no one was any the wiser, particularly given the fact that she was naturally curvaceous (a polite way of putting it) anyway. Her morning sickness was gone only to have been replaced by a ravenous appetite and she had put on at least a stone in weight.

“Shall we go down to breakfast, or would you prefer to stay here?” Severus asked placing a hand over hers as it massaged her belly. “It is the weekend – so we don’t really have to go…”

He flinched and then his eyes went wide.

“Your son is quite the gymnast,” Jessica said with a faint smile. The baby was kicking and Severus had just had his first taste of it – ever. He’d never experienced this the first time around.

Despite her fragility Jessica glowed with that unmistakable something that expectant mothers have. Some of her colleagues and students were under the impression she was in love. Even Hermione couldn’t help but to notice, but Jessica had grown expert at fobbing off the overly-observant and decidedly inquisitive Gryffindor. Still – that didn’t put anyone off from wondering who it was that the Administrator had to have a pash on and speculation was rife on the gossip mill. It pained Lupin to hear it to no end (not once did his name ever come up) especially knowing the truth. Jessica knew that she would have to sort things out between them yet again.

Severus leaned in and kissed her.

“Here,”

Kiss.

“Or”

Kiss.

“The Great Hall…?”

Their tongues battled for dominance and Jessica made it quite clear what she preferred as she pushed nagging thoughts about her lover out of her mind. Her real life Potions Master cared for and about her, and that made a far deeper impression that anything she’d ever read about his fictional counterpart. Being with him, engaging him emotionally and physically provided all that she needed.

Severus gave her a slightly worried look and was clearly engaged in an internal debate of some sort.

“You won’t hurt the baby, Severus…”

Kiss.

“But… wouldn’t it know… I mean…”

Jessica’s hands flew to her mouth and she burst out laughing. It was the first time since the incident with the Dementors and Severus took it as a sign that she was starting to get back to her old self again. She had been so quiet it had unnerved him and the Headmaster.

“I don’t suppose there is such a thing as Sexual and Reproductive Education here?”

Severus scowled – faking it of course, but it was still a very Snape-like display of temperament.

“If you are that worried about traumatising our child then I suppose we will just have to get through the next few months without….” Jessica said vaguely with a wave of her hand.

The Potions Master looked at her in mock horror and then pounced into bed beside her.

“Now don’t feel like you have to do anything on my account,” Jessica said innocently batting her eyelashes. “I am capable of restraining myself, Professor Snape.”

She put on her reading glasses and picked up her copy of Simple Charms Through the Ages and began to read.

“You hate that book,” Severus said, taking it from her hands and flinging it across the room, barely missing the fireplace altogether. He took off her glasses and placed them on the bedside table.

“Quite…”

Jessica looked at the dull sheen of the threadbare purple curtains drawn back on their four-poster canopied bed, lost in thought.

“What do you believe me to be?” Severus asked quietly as he spooned against her. He and Jessica still had not spoken of his conversations with the Headmaster concerning the secrets of her world she’d brought with her about his and the hypothesis about her bloodlines. It seemed that whenever one or the other of them meant to speak, something always happened to veer them from the intended target.

“The man I love so much that I will do whatever I can to save him by any means necessary; if you can be saved…depending on what is to come,” came a hoarse reply.

Jessica took a deep breath and sank back against Severus, welcoming the comfort of his warmth. He inched up her nightgown and began to gently rub her belly and then caress her breasts which were becoming heavy with milk. A leg went up slightly and then he moved inside her from behind.

“I don’t think we can prevent what’s meant to be, my love,” he whispered in her ear as he took his time savouring the warm throbbing wetness now enveloping him. “No matter how much I want to as much as you…”

The woman he loved moved against him.

“I only know what you have been to me, Severus,” she whispered fearfully, “and I can’t give that up. I don’t believe that I’m wrong about you; and I don’t give a damn anymore! Nothing matters to me in this godforsaken hellhole that is your world except you!”

There was a strangled cry and Snape eased Jessica onto her back and then moved between her legs.

“Oh, God – what have I done?” he cried out as he collapsed on top of her and buried his face in her hair. “What have I done to you?”

Jessica held onto him tightly, stroking his hair in acknowledgement before moving on top of him.

“I don’t care, Severus. I’ve always followed my heart and paid a high price for it. Why should this be any different? I wasn’t completely ignorant…I knew exactly what I was dealing with didn’t I?”

Severus felt even worse – if there ever was someone he did not want to hurt it was the woman making love to him. But it was inevitable that he would hurt her and they both knew it. Being as selfish as he was, he still wanted her for as long as he could have her.

“How can you stand it?” he asked reaching a hand up to cup her face. “How do you go on day after day knowing…?”

“If it wasn’t for you – I wouldn’t have. I can’t bear this anymore; you and our baby are the only things that make everything I have gone through worth it.”

Severus placed his hands on her hips, signaling he wanted her to stop.

“I am not worth such a noble sacrifice. It is folly for you to sacrifice yourself for my sake. I am damned, Jessica. And if I were half the man I should be I would have never dragged you into this hell of mine!”

“It’s what I wanted; It’s what I always wanted deep down from the moment I got here. Funny how much greener the grass seems on the other side… especially when I am colouring it…”

Severus looked at her quizzically and Jessica moved to lay in his arms as the sun stubbornly poked through the heavy clouds outside their window, however temporary.

“Might as well come clean about everything…” she said quietly.

“Oh? You mean you withheld information from the Headmaster?”

Jessica shook her head ‘yes’.

“I see…” Severus said thoughtfully as he rubbed her belly tenderly.

“It’s …it’s all rather embarrassing…some of what I have to say…”

“I’m listening, Jessica. Whatever you want to say to me, I am listening.”

Jessica took a deep breath and grimaced slightly as the baby kicked hard.

“Trying to explain Fan Fiction is like trying to explain what chocolate tastes like to someone who who doesn’t have the sense of taste…”

“Fan Fiction?”

“Yes. It started because of a television show in my world – Star Trek. The series had a short run – and then it was syndicated in repeats for years. Some fans started writing their own stories of that universe and its characters. And they invented their own aspects of that universe and new characters as well. It took hold and fan fiction became a big deal within the fandoms – films, books, other TV shows; you name it…”

“And you were one of these people – writing this…Fan Fiction.”

“Yes…” Jessica sniffed.

“What about?” Severus asked gently even though he already knew.

“The world of Harry Potter – and…and…its characters…”

“Anyone in particular?”

Jessica nodded and wiped tears from her eyes.

“You…” she said as she got up from bed and sat on the window seat, looking at the driving rain outside. “I told you – I knew I loved you before I met you; that was the god’s honest truth.”

She closed her eyes, leaning against the window. This was the part where the fearsome Potions Master would go off on a legendary rant of insults and put-downs. After an agonising wait that felt much longer than it actually was, strong arms went around her; warm lips grazed hers and then kissed all over her face before Jessica was embraced in a grateful hug.

“Don’t you think I’m a dunderhead?” she sniffed before wiping her nose.

“You must be, to love me as you do…to have gone through so much because of me,” Severus teased (though he was quite serious about the sentiment) before kissing her again.

“It’s a dirty job, but someone had to do it…” Jessica said hesitantly trying to smile.

“I would quite like to know,” Snape said tracing the line of her jaw, “how it was that you saw me then…before we actually met…”

There was no reply as Jessica moved a hand across her belly.

“Your imagination must be quite amazing, very much so indeed…” he continued. “…as much as your compassion; your understanding; your voice… Exceptional – but then you are an exceptional woman.”

“High compliments indeed; and I am not worthy of them, Severus; not one of them...”

“Ah, but you are.”

“And why is that?”

“Because that is how I see you, Jessica; and you are everything I ever wanted...”

xxxXXXxxx

“You wanted to see me, Severus?” Dumbledore asked pleasantly as Snape took a seat, his countenance unreadable.

“I think it is about time we cleared the air, Headmaster – don’t you?”

The Headmaster touched the tips of his fingers together bringing to mind the old children’s game about church and steeple.

“So you have decided that you actually do love Miss Newkirk. A good thing given her current condition – which, by the way, will bear quite a bit of explaining as will your child. There are only so many secrets these hallowed walls can contain.”

Snape’s hands gripped the sides of his armchair. It was the only thing preventing him from launching himself at the old man.

“And surely you expected nothing less when you first instructed me to get close to her! Does it ever stop, Headmaster?”

“It?”

“The lengths to which you will go for the sake of the greater good! Your aims may be noble – but this is a real-life game of Wizard’s Chess we are all engaged in! The woman I care about could have died and our child with her!”

Dumbledore leaned back in his high-backed chair and peered at his Potions Master over his spectacles. There was a slight hesitation and then he smiled.

Snape hesitated and then a startling realisation struck him.

“Yes, Severus. All it was ever really about was that love would finally find you and that you would allow it at last. Matters have progressed as I thought they would and you will just have to resent me for not being apologetic about the finer details of how your pairing came to be.”

The Potions Master was filled with an incandescent rage that threatened to overwhelm every molecule of his being.

“Would you have me undo all that has gone before us from the moment of Jessica’s arrival?” Dumbledore asked quietly.

Rather than answering, Snape did the only thing he could do – he sat down and scowled, his mouth set in a grim, thin line. With few exceptions, he had never been one for personal trivialities and now was no exception.

“So – what do we do about…” the Potions Master began, breaking the uneasy silence between them finally.

“We get on – as best we can, come what may…”

xxxXXXxxx

Jessica had dismissed Pince for the afternoon. The older woman was a bigger irritant than usual and just added to the stress of doing the job. There was a lot to get on with and the work was much easier without any unnecessary distractions. She was finally able to sort out the collection of rare books that had been woefully neglected and was making good progress.

BOOM!

“What the hell…” Jessica muttered as she flew towards the noise.

She was stopped short when she saw who the culprit was. Hermione had somehow managed to knock over a display case of wizarding antiquities, scattering the contents of it and her bulging book bags.

“Oh! And I had just finished!” Hermione wailed as she dropped to the floor and began to frantically scramble after shattered bottles of ink and blotted rolls of parchment. “I’ll have to it all over again!”

Jessica hesitated, and that was probably a mistake. But she saw no point in taking out the wand Dumbledore had given her only to be shown up as not being able to use it at all. Hermione looked up at Jessica for only the briefest of moments and then took out her wand aiming it at the mess. A few short minutes later and all was as it should be, including her homework. Jessica had been doing bits and pieces by hand and it was not unnoticed by the inquisitive Gryffindor.

“Is that alright?” Hermione asked, clearly flustered by the fact that Jessica hadn’t used any magic whatsoever.

“Yes, it is. No one would even guess there had been an accident here… fortunately no harm done.” Jessica said slowly, turning away. “Hermione – why don’t we go up to my office for a wee chat, hmm?”