Inside Your Mind

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters, they all belong to J.K.R.

A/N – So sorry that it took me this long to put this up!

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Chapter Seventeen – Research and Tolerance Problems

“There’s one thing I don’t get.”

“Just one thing, Potter? I was under the impression that your confusion was as abysmal as a bottomless pit,” came the reply, brimming with disdain.

Harry glared at Snape. “Tell me again why I’m working with you?”

Snape sighed. “Lupin believes we should try to ‘work out our differences’. I, however, have no such need, nor desire, to get along with you,” he finished, with the utmost amount of contempt.

“So if the only thing you desire in this situation is to snap at me, why did you agree?”

“That is not your concern, Potter.” The statement was delivered in Snape’s usual spiteful tone, but his slightly colored face belied his manner. Harry smirked.

“So it’s about sex, then.”

Snape caught the glass vial he had been holding a second before it crashed into the cold stone floor of the dungeons. Straightening slowly, he glared into the glinting emerald eyes.

“I’m a glad I amuse you,” he said dryly, in a way that suggested that he was anything but. In fact, he sounded more as if he wanted nothing more than to hurl the glass vial at Potter’s smirking face.

“I’m glad you amuse me, too,” Harry replied cheekily. “See, we’re making progress already.”

Snape sighed and placed his face in his hands.

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Draco glanced over to the other side of the room, observing Snape’s exasperated position with a slight smirk. Annoying Sev always left him with a feeling of satisfaction, one that he was sure his boyfriend was experiencing, based on his grin alone. The satisfaction was due to the fact that Snape had to have at least a miniscule amount of tolerance for the one who was teasing him, or else that one would be severely hexed within a matter of moments. Draco supposed he saw it as a reminder that he was someone Sev didn’t want to hex; his exasperated but non-violent reactions were reassuring in a very twisted way.

Although, he had to admit that Snape’s resistance to cursing Harry probably had something to do with Lupin. He turned to the one he was working with.

“So,” he began, his smirk widening, “how in the world did you ever convince Sev to work with Harry?”

To his surprise, Lupin smirked in return. “Let’s just say that’s my position in Severus’s life allows me to be rather persuasive when I want to be.”

“Rather Slytherin of you, isn’t that?”

Lupin chuckled. “Yes, well, what can I say? It’s the Slytherin influence. For example, I highly doubt that Harry would be teasing Severus like that if he hadn’t witnessed you doing it several times.”

“That’s probably true, but this is much more fun to watch,” Draco replied seriously, causing Remus to laugh again.

“That it is.”

The two worked in silence for a few minutes, slowly making their way through the large pile of books on the floor next to the table they were sitting at. They were looking through many various books on bonding, searching for what was apparently the only book that held any mention of the specifics of the Soularous bond. Dumbledore had asked them to find it.

“Why is there nothing written about our bloody bond?” Draco growled, slamming the book he had just skimmed shut.

“Because it’s too powerful,” Lupin replied, his eyes never leaving the book in front of him.

“Just how powerful is it?” Draco asked curiously, reaching over for a new book.

“Powerful enough that it’s only mentioned in one book out of the hundred or so we have here.”

The blonde rolled his eyes. “Thank you for letting me know, because I wasn’t listening when Dumbledore said it twenty times.”

Remus sighed, looking up. “Your soul is your essence, both magical and emotional. It’s the main source of power for your magic. The power in one wizard or witch’s soul allows them to perform curses such as the Unforgivables;” and here Draco winced, “it gives us one person the power to perform the killing curse. “

“Your soul is joined with Harry’s, Draco. Initially, the power that each of you have is doubled. Then, it is tripled because of the power of the bond itself. You and Harry are in love; that makes all of that five times stronger, at the minimum, ten times at the most. Also, you two are already powerful wizards before the bond. Take the amount of power you have now and imagine it about twelve or thirteen times stronger; that’s what this bond basically is.”

Draco felt light-headed and he dropped his head down onto the unopened book in front of him in an attempt to make the room stop spinning around him. He didn’t make a sound as he sat here; he simply focused on regulating his breathing so that he wouldn’t faint.

Minutes later, without raising his head, he muttered, “I should have expected no less when getting involved with Harry Potter.”

When Remus threw back his head and laughed, Draco found the strength to lift his head and look at him very strangely. Even Harry and Snape stopped their bickering long enough for each to send Draco a bewildered look that mirrored Draco’s own. The blonde just shrugged and set about opening the book in front of him while the other two turned back to the potions they were working on, continuing their bickering.

Finally, Lupin stopped laughing and returned to the book in front of him as well, and was about to turn the page when Draco spoke again.

“How powerful were Harry’s parents?”

Remus’s hand froze, and the page he had been turning fell from between his fingers, unnoticed.

“Why do you want to know?”

Draco shrugged, flipping a page aimlessly. “I’m curious. I mean, he’s Harry Potter – all that power had to come from somewhere.”

“Parts of Harry’s abilities do come from them, but most of them are his alone. He has power that some people only dream of, and he does not even realize it. However, James and Lily Potter were both very powerful and talented.”

The slightly faraway look on Lupin’s face as he spoke about Harry’s parents prompted Draco to press forward, for these were things Harry either didn’t know or had yet to tell him.

“What were they like?”

Smiling slightly, Remus leaned back in his chair. “Well, Harry definitely inherited his ability to get into situations from James, just as he inherited that ability to get out of them just as easily. James was rather reckless sometimes, just like Harry, although James’s recklessness was always spurred on by Sirius. In fact, the Weasley twins sort of remind me of James and Sirius together, although I must say that Fred and George are much more clever in their pranks.”

The books on the table were forgotten for the moment as Draco leaned forward, taking in everything Remus was saying as though he never wanted to forget it.

“Lily was exceptionally kind, always apologizing for James and Sirius, defending the ones they teased on occasion, such as Severus.”

“Harry’s mother defended Sev to James Potter and Sirius Black?” Draco was incredulous.

Laughing lightly, Lupin said, “Harry said the same thing. That was the kind of person Lily was. It took James two years to finally convince her to go out with him, and luckily for him, that was all it took.”

“Harry looks so much like James, especially the hair. But he definitely has his mother’s green eyes, so full of fire and life. Harry is most definitely their child, and they live in him more than he knows, probably more than he will allow himself to know for some time.”

Lupin’s was looking at Harry fondly, and Draco followed his gaze. The two sat there for a moment in silence, until Harry felt their gazes on him and turned around questioningly.

:Draco, what are you two talking about?:

Draco smiled at him. :Lupin was telling me about your parents.:

Harry nearly dropped the water he was holding. :Why?:

:Because I asked him to. Your mother defended Sev?:

:Yea, with good reason.:

Draco raised an eyebrow. :What do you mean?:

Turning slightly red, Harry lowered his eyes from Draco’s gaze. :I didn’t mean to say that.:

:Harry…:

:Well, my dad and Sirius certainly weren’t very nice to him. Kind of like how you used to be with me, only without the whole obsessed thing going on.:

:I was not obsessed with you!:

:Right…whatever you say, Draco…How did this relationship start again?:

:I…Well…it was mutual!:

:Yes, that’s true. However, I do believe that it was you wanking while thinking about me, and it was you that came on to me.:

:That was…You…Damn it, Potter!:

“I must say,” Lupin commented, “it’s quite an interesting change to see your face red while Harry is laughing.”

Draco just glared silver daggers at him, which the other chose to ignore in favor of laughing.

“It’s quite amusing, really.”

“Aren’t you Gryffindors supposed to have something against torturing people?”

“That’s where Slytherins are wrong about Gryffindors. Just because we’re rumored to be good and noble doesn’t mean we don’t like to enjoy ourselves now and then.”

“I noticed,” Draco replied shortly.

Returning to his book, the blonde flipped the pages angrily while Lupin chuckled.

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As Harry watched his fuming boyfriend practically tearing pages from the book in front of him, he couldn’t help but laugh.

:You’re cute when you’re frustrated.:

The blonde’s head snapped up and he once again glared at Harry. :I am not cute! I’m a Malfoy, for Merlin’s sake.: he replied coolly.

:That must be why I have this urge to ruffle your hair, then.:

Slim hands flew up protectively to blonde hair. :You wouldn’t dare.: he hissed.

:We’ll see later.:

Draco had an idea. :I doubt that.:

Harry looked up again. :And why is that?:

The blonde responded by sending a very enticing image of them, involving Draco pinning Harry to his bed, preventing him from moving and leaving him entirely at the mercy of the other’s mouth, which was licking a slow path down his chest. :Because, love,: he replied, :Later we’ll be much too busy doing other things for you to think of ruffling my hair.:

Harry shuddered, grabbing the edge of the desk in front of him for support as he regained his composure. Then he glared. :You’re evil.:

Draco grinned widely. :Thank you.:

Rolling his eyes, Harry returned to his chopping, which was the only thing that Snape would let him do. He was quiet for few minutes; before their bantering had begun, Draco had reminded him of something.

“Professor,” he said suddenly, “Last year, when we were doing Occlumency, that memory I saw…” He paused as he saw Snape stiffen noticeably, but when the other didn’t comment, he continued.

“I, uh..I asked Sirius about it, before he…well, you know.”

Snape’s movements became somewhat jerky, losing their usual smoothness. “Did you?” he said carefully, a slight edge to his voice. “And what did he say?”

“He didn’t really say much, only that he really didn’t like you back then, but that him and my dad were young then. But he looked rather…remorseful…He kept like looking at the floor and stuff and he told me to be careful how I acted. It’s actually part of the reason it was so easy to put my past with Draco behind us so that we could just focus on what’s happening now.”

Snape snorted lightly, and Harry quickly continued, not having meant to share that last part. “Anyway, I’m sorry that him and my dad did any of that.”

“Potter, you cannot apologize for actions that were not your own.”

Harry faked surprise. “You mean all of this time, you haven’t been hating me because of things my father did? Wow, I must have been imagining that.” Snape allowed himself a small smirk at the sarcasm, seeing as he did rather appreciate it. “I don’t hate you,” he said, without thinking. Potter’s green eyes widened, and Snape could practically feel the smirk coming.

“See? We’re making progress,” Potter said, the smirk firmly in place. Snape groaned.

“Anyway, it’s not as if Sirius is here to apologize himself,” the Gryffindor commented bluntly, and Severus was a little shocked at the pure bitterness that laced Harry’s words.

Someone Potter’s age shouldn’t be that bitter already, Severus found himself thinking. It occurred to him that Draco was the same way, that both had seen more than they should have. Perhaps that’s what drew them together; that and the fact that all their bickering had to end in something or other.

He looked over to Potter, who was now chopping the roots with a vengeance, as though willing away the unfairness of it all. Smirking slightly at the childish pout on the other’s face, he sighed. Damn you, Lupin, why do you have to be right?

“So, Potter, what was your question from earlier?”

Potter looked at him, his eyes guarded at the almost polite tone. “I have two now.”

Snape rolled his eyes. “Then it would be wise to start with one, seeing as I can only answer one at a time.”

“How did Bellatrix get out of Azkaban?”

“With the help of Lucius Malfoy, I imagine.”

“But I thought he’s on our side now.”

“Merlin only knows what side he’s on,” Snape muttered under his breath before raising his voice so that Harry could hear him.

“Bellatrix was out of Azkaban before Lucius knew about you and Draco.”

“Why didn’t you do something?”

“What am I supposed to do, Potter? Order her to go back to Azkaban and somehow take on fifteen Death Eaters? I must be alive to help the Order, Potter.”

“Sorry.”

Snape looked up. Has Potter ever apologized to me before? He sighed. “What was your other question?”

“What are all these potions for?”

Snape began pointing to the various cauldrons while explaining. “That’s Veritaserum, just because I’m running low. I would have thought even you could recognize the truth serum, Potter.” Harry rolled his eyes. “The rest of these are various potions that keep the Dark Lord from knowing when I lie and help keep me from getting found out as a spy. There are also ones that help one to withstand pain.” He paused for a moment, as if reliving the moments these potions had helped him through.

“Oh, and there’s the Wolfsbane…”

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“Lupin, I think I found it.”

Remus stopped paging though his book and leaned over. “Where?”

Draco pointed to a section of the ancient page that was labeled Soularous and began reading it silently. After a moment, he said quickly, “This is it, listen – ‘When two connected by this bond perform even a simple defense spell, their power must be carefully focused. If it is not, the spell will spread to surrounding areas quickly and unsafely.’ That’s what happened to Harry and me in Hogsmeade, when Bellatrix attacked us.” He narrowed his eyes. “Come to think about it, why wasn’t Apparating a problem?”

“Apparating already takes a lot of power, so the bond would just make it easier.”

“Well, I didn’t feel like shit after Apparating like I normally do…”

Lupin laughed.

“Are you sure we don’t have to look through the rest of these books?” Draco asked.

“Dumbledore said that it was only in one of them, so for now, we’ll leave them. Let’s tell -”

He paused after turning in the direction of Harry and Snape, then turned back to Draco. “Is it just me, or have they stopped bickering quite so much?”

The Slytherin looked over curiously. Severus was pointing to a cauldron and saying something, but there was no sneer on his face. Okay, there was a slight smirk – but that was certainly better than the everyday I wish you would die one.

And it appeared as though Harry was actually listening. Willingly. With no resisting looks. Okay, so there was a slight resistance – but that was certainly different from the normal Why must I be put through this endless torture one.

“Look, they’re all grown up,” Draco said dryly and Lupin chuckled.

“You’re quite funny sometimes,” Remus said as they made their way over to the other two. “In a dry, twisted sort of way.”

“And you’re quite surprising,” Draco responded. “In that all-Gryffindors-seem-to-have-a-hidden-personality kind of way.”

They reached Harry and Severus, and Draco pulled his boyfriend close by his waist before saying, “We found the book. Can we go now?”

Snape shot him a look. “Remus and I are the ones that had to give up our time – this isn’t even a lesson night.”

“What do you say we blame it on Dumbledore and call it a night?”

The two elder men sighed. “Fine, you can go.”

Harry and Draco were halfway down the hall when Remus caught up with them. “Harry…can I talk to you for a second?”

Harry nodded. “Draco, you can go, I’ll be right there.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yea, don’t worry.”

The blonde gave him a quick kiss before disappearing down the hallway in the direction of their room. Harry turned back to Remus.

“What’s up?”

“Well, since Sirius is…well, you know…” (neither could yet bring themselves to utter the words Sirius and gone in the same sentence) “I was thinking that maybe…well, maybe you might want me to…”

Remus was acting nervous, wringing his hands and lowering his head, and it was new to Harry. Lupin was known for his ability to stay calm and collected in the worst of situations, ever the practical one. “Want you to what, Remus?”

Finally looking up, Lupin said, “Be your godfather.”

Harry was still.

Lupin became nervous again, mumbling quickly, “If you don’t want me to, than it’s okay, I just thought –”

He was cut off by Harry throwing his arms around his neck. “I think that’s a great idea.”

Laughing with relief, Lupin hugged him back, and Harry pulled away slightly. “You do realize what you’re getting yourself into, right?”

Remus looked puzzled, so Harry continued.

“Every person that’s ever been in a parental position in relation to me has kind of well…died.” He said this in a joking manner, but there was an undercurrent of worry that Lupin felt.

“Well, I’ll try my best to die, then. I don’t think it would be very pleasant for me either, let alone you.”

Harry laughed and let him go. “I have to get to Draco, but thank you.” He said this with such sincerity that Remus found himself once again regretting all of the sorrow that this boy went through. He was amazed at how happy Harry was at just the thought of a parental figure. Sirius must have meant the world to him. He felt a slight pang in his chest, but ignored it. Now is not the time to linger in the past.

Harry hugged him one last time before disappearing down the hallway as Remus smiled. He was doing this for Sirius, and he knew it, but it didn’t change how much he cared about Harry.

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Walking slowly down the corridor, Harry smiled to himself. Interesting night. First, I’ve started getting along with Snape, which is scary in itself. Then, Remus asked to be my godfather.

But he’s not Sirius, a little voice in the back of his head said, causing a surge of guilt to rush through him.

Yes, but he cares about me, Harry told the other voice firmly. He was so caught up n his own thoughts that he did not notice a shadowy figure approaching him slowly and cautiously.

A second and one quick Stupefy later, Harry Potter was indeed unconscious.

A hooded figure leaned over him and divested him of his wand, a twisted grin forming on the features that the hood shadowed.

“That was way too easy.”