If the Crime Fits the Punishment

ok...we all know the drill...... so not mine..... so j.k. rowlings. just borrowing them for the time being. i will return them at some point.

raunch warning! turn back if you are easily offended. no really, i\'m serious.

and finally, as i always state, reading is great. reviewing is good, too. feel free to do so. you can even leave suggestions and comments if you like. i do try to work them in.

Chapter Sixteen: School Daze
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the days that followed, Kendra noticed a difference in Severus\' attitude. While he was respectful of her, he never quite seemed as if he were there. He spoke to her with indifference, and it was as if he were looking through her, not seeing her standing before him. She could think of no explanation for his behavior other than he wasn\'t thrilled about her pregnancy. The idea that he didn\'t want the baby took the immense joy she felt over the two of them having a child and turned it to so much dust. It affected her own feelings, and she found herself feeling blue more often than not.

He had ordered her, after the bath the day her parents had visited, that she was to stay in his private chambers during the days. The fall session of the new school year was starting up in only a few days and he didn\'t want her seen in the halls during classes. It seemed to her that he was suddenly embarrassed by her, and that only served to upset her more. On one of those days when she wandered out of the dungeon passageways and ventured to the upper levels of the castle, she met up with Poppy, who gave her a few books and pamphlets on how to care for herself during her pregnancy. One of the things the books had told her was that she would have mood swings. They said that she needed to try to remain calm and level headed. The people who had written those books had obviously never dealt with Severus Snape before.

She had considered speaking to Professor McGonagall about moving to different quarters, but quickly decided against it. If she asked the other woman, she would have to explain why she wanted to move. And she couldn\'t bear for anyone to know that she was that unhappy. So she stayed with him in his private chambers. During the days, he spoke to her only when he needed to. At night, she lay in the bed next to him, but he never got close to her. Most nights, she lay awake long into the evening and waited until she was sure he was asleep. Then she would exhaust herself by crying herself to sleep.

~*~

Severus noticed a certain listlessness in Kendra each day when she awoke. Her face was pale, her features washed out, and he could swear that he had heard her sobbing once or twice in the middle of the night. He had looked through the books she had brought back from Poppy on pregnancy, as unfamiliar with it as she was. They had said that a pregnant woman was subject to mood swings because of a high amount of hormones in her system, but he had to wonder if the behavior he was seeing in her was normal. He disliked the distance between them, but he was having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that he might not be the father of the child she carried.

He wasn\'t sure how he could make her smile again, and he wanted to see her smile. He missed her smiles and her laughter and her light hearted nature. Those things that brought light into his solitary life were gone. He suspected he was the cause of it, but was unsure how to bring them back. It made his days long and detestable. Particularly with the new term starting. In only a few days, the students would be arriving and he\'d have an entirely new class of miserably inadept first years to deal with. He wasn\'t up to teaching the ungrateful, sodding little bastards this year. Some of the joy in being a git had gone out of him.

Each night was a trial, laying next to her in his bed without touching her. His hands itched to pull her close to him and soothe away her troubles. But he didn\'t think she wanted him to touch her, so he kept his distance. He wanted her to stay in his chambers. Had in fact requested it. Most likely a touch too sharply based on the look she had given him. There were students still in attendance who knew her, and he didn\'t think she needed to deal with any snide comments they might heap upon her in her present state. Once they found out who she was and why she was there.... and he knew they would, the Hogwart\'s grapevine was more trustworthy than a chastity belt..... the students would give her a very hard time. He wanted to spare her some of the grief he would get.

He thought often about the babe growing in her belly. He wanted it to be his, but he was afraid to find out. He had thought of going to Poppy and asking a few questions, but that would require answering certain questions he\'d rather not be asked. So he remained silent. Until he could figure out something, he would keep himself apart from her. He would keep himself from feeling.....

~*~*~*~*~

Severus stormed into his private chambers. His last class of the day had just let out and he had a headache that would kill an hippogriff. The first years were driving him to a fit of murderous rage. The thought of strangling a few necks was looking better every day. Today, he\'d taken twenty points from the Gryffindor House for a broken quill and another twenty from Slytherin for the laughter one girl had let slip when he\'d chastised a child who was far more inept at Potions than Neville Longbottom had ever been. During the course of the last three weeks since term had started, he\'d deducted well over two hundred points from all his classes.

Dropping into the chair, he heaved a great sigh and wondered why he was even bothering anymore. The youth of today would likely become the destructive adults of tomorrow. He just wanted things to go back to an even keel. He\'d been slightly off his normal, nasty ways ever since Kendra had laughed her way into his life. She didn\'t even argue with him anymore. He missed the verbal sparring the two of them engaged in. She had a wickedly sharp wit and an even sharper tongue. She had never missed a moment to sharpen them on his hide. And he missed that.

He needed to do something, needed to find a way to fix whatever was wrong between them. He couldn\'t take the silence that stood between them anymore. Pushing himself up from the leather cushion beneath him, he headed for the door again. It was time to go have a talk with the one person in the school who might be able to help him with this dilema.

The corridors were silent as he stalked through them. Most everyone would be eating the evening meal in the Great Hall, so he knew he would encounter no one. Luck was with him, as he made it to his destination unaccosted. The doors of the Hospital Wing loomed up before him, and he pushed through them with a measure of his old arrogance. Poppy was in her small office, reading something. He stopped at the open door and rapped his knuckles on the frame. She glanced up at him, her face showing her surprise at seeing him there. \'Severus, what brings you here?\'

\' I need information,\' he barked out at her. She raised a brow at his imperious tone. \' I need to know about how...... Can you tell.....What I mean to say is....\'

Poppy interrupted him, \'Get ahold of yourself and spit it out, man! Honestly, it\'s a wonder you survived your Death Eater days, as scattered as you seem to be!\'

\'Are there ways of discovering the paternity of an unborn child?\' he snapped heatedly.

\'Of course, Severus. But why would you be interested in such a thing?\' she glanced at him in curiosity. He turned and stalked away from her, knowing that to get the answer to his question, he would first have to answer hers. The idea of admitting that Kendra had slept with someone other than him was difficult. He certainly didn\'t need for anyone to know about Malfoy and his son.

\'You\'re the bloody medi witch! You tell me!\' he snarled at her angrily. She gave him a sharp glance, then shook her head.

\'Alright, it\'s obvious you don\'t care to answer my question. It can be done, but perhaps I could ask Kendra instead of putting her through tests. She might be willing to answer them for me,\' Poppy suggested lightly. It was plain to her that he had a reason for wanting to know such a thing. It was just as plain to her that he didn\'t wish to discuss his reasons with her.

\' I would be very appreciative if you would,\' he replied.

\' I\'ll send for her tomorrow. She\'s due a check up, and I\'ll do it then,\' Poppy assured him.

\'Thank you. Please inform me of your findings,\' he inclined his head to her and stalked from the Hospital Wing. She watched him go, a bemused look on her face. If Severus were worried about the paternity of the child, she couldn\'t wait to hear why.

~*~*~*~*~

Kendra stepped into the empty Hospital Wing, wondering why Poppy would insist on seeing her in the middle of the day. She was certain, were Severus to find out, she would be in more trouble than she could handle. She found Madam Pomfrey waiting for her at the end, near one of the private beds. The medi witch waved her over and motioned to the cot. Kendra sat on the edge of it and looked at Poppy curiously.

\' It\'s important for the health of the babe, and yourself, that we have regular visits. You need to ensure that you eat properly. Take supplements. If you will allow me, I\'ll give you a check up once a month. We\'ll check on the baby\'s growth,\' Poppy told her in a business like tone. Kendra nodded and waited for the exam to start.

Madam Pomfrey poked and prodded, charmed and bespelled, telling Kendra everything she was doing. Why she was doing it when the task was performed. She was able to hear the babe\'s heartbeat with a magnifying spell, the tiny muscle beating rapidly inside her womb.The sound of the little heart brought her to tears, at the same time making her laugh. It was one of the most amazing things she\'d ever heard. When all the tests had been completed, Poppy gave her a clean bill of health.

\' It looks as if the two of you are getting along just splendidly. I only have a few more questions for you, then you\'re free to go,\' she told her patient. Kendra sat up and adjusted her robes, then slipped from the small cot. \' Now, I\'m under the impression that there\'s some question of paternity. If you like, we can perform a spell.......\'

\'What?\' the girl shouted at her. Poppy watched the fire flare up in her eyes and gave a faint smile. \'What do you mean, a question of paternity? Who told you such a moronic tale?\'

\'You mean there\'s no reason to perform a paternity test?\' Poppy asked, intrigued.

\'Of course there\'s no bloody reason! Why should there be a bloody reason? I know bloody well who the father is! Who ever came bearing tales needs their ears boxed! I want to know what addle pated twit came to ye with that story! I\'m going to make sure.....\' Kendra ragged, her eyes burning with her anger. She continued on, but Poppy paid her no mind. She didn\'t need to hear the rest of what the girl planned to do.

\' I\'m washing my hands of this mess,\' she muttered to herself. \'Severus can do his own dirty work.\'

\'Severus?\' the red head whipped around toward her. \'Ye mean to tell me that stupid bastard wanted ye to find out who the father is? I\'m going to wring his bloody neck! I want his balls on a silver platter! I\'m going to....\' The ranting faded away as Kendra stomped out of the Hospital Wing. As soon as she was sure that the girl could no longer hear her, Poppy broke out into peals of laughter. She very much wanted to be there to see this.

~*~*~*~*~

Kendra had gone back to the dungeons after her visit with Madam Pomfrey and stewed in her anger. She was in shock that Severus had actually gone and asked Poppy to find out the paternity of the babe she carried. He had some nerve, he did. She was going to remove it. Right after she ripped his testicles off. How dare he? What was wrong with the stupid man anyway? She was going to kill him!

Taking a deep breath, she tried calming herself. Getting this worked up would not be good for her or the child. She needed to get her head straight, clear the mess from it before talking to Severus. If not, she\'d likely gouge his eyes out. She decided on a walk outside, around the edge of the lake. It was a favored spot for her to go when she needed peace. Now would be a very good time to try and reclaim her serenity.

She checked the clock on the wall, noting the time. Classes would be out for the afternoon soon, so she had to leave now. She retrieved a piece of parchment and a quill from his private office and scribbled him a short note to tell him where she would be. Then she slipped out of the dungeon, working her way to the Entrance Hall and the doors outside.

It was still fairly warm out, so there was no need for a heavy cloak. She walked briskly out onto the lawns, turning to her left and heading for the lake. The faint breeze, the sunny skies both combined to help calm her raging blood. The lake was serene in the light of the late afternoon. She found a tree along the bank and settled underneath it. She stared off at the calm surface of water, allowing her mind to unclutter itself. There was so much she didn\'t understand, and the confusion was giving her a pounding ache behind her eyes.

As her mind wandered, she lost track of time. It wasn\'t until it was full dark that Kendra finally realized she still sat under the tree by the lake. She was, at least, calmer than she had been. She stood slowly, moving away from the tree. It was time to head back into the castle.

~*~*~*~*~

Severus entered his chambers and sighed. The day had been awful, and dinner even worse. He had been tempted to stop by and speak with Poppy, but he had instructed her to come to him with what she had learned. He sat on the couch for a moment, allowing some of the day\'s stresses to slide off his shoulders. It was while he was sitting there that he realized that his rooms were too silent. He stood and went to the bedroom. All he found was that damned cat of hers, curled up on his pillow. He checked each room for signs of Kendra, but she was no where to be found. Where had the wench gotten to now?

His temper broke as he returned to the living room. He was now thoroughly pissed off and he was likely to strangle her when he found her. He was of a mind to believe that she had gone back to Malfoy this time, despite her claims of love. That sent his mind off in another fit of rage and he began tearing the rooms apart, searching for the collar and leash.

He found them curled up in a chest of drawers Kendra had placed her undergarments into. His hand had just curled over them when he heard the door to his rooms shut. He stalked out into the living area to find Kendra slipping back into his chambers. He scowled at her, putting on the most fearsome one in his arsenal, and waited for her to look up at him.

She moved across the floor, her face lowered as she studied the patterns on the carpet. She knew he was standing there, could feel his black gaze boring into her back. She refused to acknowledge him for a moment as she settled herself on the couch, her back presented to him. With her gaze locked on the fireplace before her, she spoke to him in a soft voice. \'I had a most interesting meeting with Madam Pomfrey today,\' she said.

\'And that\'s where you\'ve been all bloody day?\' he demanded angrily.

\'Not all day, no. It was earlier this afternoon. But then again, you\'ve known where I was all day long. I can\'t imagine why you should sound so put out,\' her tone was reasonable.

\'And I was supposed to be aware of your where abouts every second of the day how? By telepathy?\'

\'No, I left you this note,\' she shook her head, then got up and retreived the rolled up parchment. When she turned to give it to him, she saw his anger in the tight set of his lips and the look in his eyes. She couldn\'t imagine why he was angry. She was the one who had the right to be angry. \'Had you bothered to pick it up and read it, it would have explained to you exactly where I was.\'

She went over to him and held it out to him. He merely shook his head. \'You can just tell me what it says.\'

\'Alright,\' she agreed, gnashing her teeth at his stubborn nature. \'If you must know, I was down to the lake. I needed to calm myself and think.\'

\'For what? What could you possibly have to think over?\'

\'You know that I think, that I am not without my own mind with my own thoughts. I was trying to rein in my anger at being asked who the father of our child is! Imagine my shock at being asked that question, then to find out that you were the one in doubt! Are you some sort of half wit?\' she demanded, her temper flaring. The hand at his side uncurled and she saw the damned leather collar and leash unfurl. Her eyes snapped fire, and before he saw it coming, her palm connected with his pale cheek. The imprint immediately reddened.

\' I would not advise you to ever lay a hand on me in anger again,\' he warned. She flung her head and turned for the door. \'And where do you think you\'re going?\'

\' I dinna think it\'s any of yer bloody business! I certainly didna expect ye ta act like one of yer little first year Slytherins! When ye can act like a mon, we\'ll talk!\' she yanked the door open. Stepping out into the hallway, she whirled to face him. \'And, in case ye\'re really interested, Malfoy and Draco may have had me, but ye\'re the only one who came into ma pussy! Malfoy came in ma mouth, Draco in ma arse! They only wanted to be where ye hadn\'t been! Had ye bothered ta ask me aboot it, I\'d have gladly told ye!\'

She pulled the door behind her and slammed it as hard as she could. He was left standing in a state of mild shock. Had he heard her correctly? His mind went back over her words, converting the Scots to proper English. Yes, he had. She had just told him that he was the father of her child. He cursed himself a fool and let go of the leash. It appeared that he had much apologizing to do now. He crossed the floor and went to the door.

The hallway outside his door was empty, so he headed for the upper levels of the castle. Logic, what little of it he seemed to possess, told him that she would most likely go some place where no one would find her. Outside, he decided. He stalked his way through the halls, coming across several students who were gaping up the hall in the direction opposite the one he had come. Kendra had definitely been this way. He continued on, ignoring the looks of confusion the students he passed tossed his way.

She wasn\'t in the Entrance Hall when he got there. The double doors were shut, telling him she\'d most probably run to get here. In the temper she was in, he didn\'t doubt it for a moment. He crossed the shining floor and stepped out into the night air. No one was outside the castle this time of night, between homework and curfew, so there was nobody to question. That left him the option of walking around the grounds himself. Heaving a sigh, he started out for the lake, deciding to start there.

~You\'re a complete git! This is a stupid move! She\'s already been down there, she showed you the note. Oh wait, you didn\'t want to read the note. You know this was a total waste of our time,~ his brain snapped at him irritably. Severus ignored his mind\'s comments and kept going. ~Fine! Don\'t listen to me! I don\'t know anything, after all.~

\'Shut up, you!\' he snapped at himself under his breath.

~*~*~*~*~

Kendra leaned against the tallest of the three goal posts on the Quidditch pitch and stared out into the darkness. How could one man be such a stupid ass? She dropped her shoes by the pole, then strolled across the sand, still warm beneath her bare toes from the sun shining upon it earlier that day. She didn\'t understand how he could make her so mad with something that he had probably thought was a reasonable question. He hadn\'t actually asked her anything about her experience with the Malfoys, but she hadn\'t volunteered infromation, either.

They needed to learn how to communicate. It was obvious to her now that he had been worried about who the father was. His attitude with her had stemmed from that. Not that he was regretting the pregnancy. She supposed she could see things from his point of view. The idea that she might be carrying a Malfoy offspring had most probably driven him batty. But she couldn\'t figure out why he hadn\'t merely asked her about it, instead of going about it in a very..... well, Slytherin sort of way.

She strolled to about the middle of the pitch before she stopped and looked up at the sky. There were thin clouds drifting lazily over the full moon, making the round orb appear distorted. She offered up a prayer to the goddess her family had worshipped for many generations, asking for help in trying to make things right. He was certainly a stubborn man. Proud, too. ~Hateful, mean, rotten, miserable, waspish....~ her mind began a tirade. She cut it off with three words, murmured out loud. \' I love him.\'

~Stupid girl,~ her brain sighed, but didn\'t acutally sound put out. She chuckled at it softly, then settled herself down on the thick grass, sitting in the center of the pitch. Her gaze stayed focused on the moon above her, and she lost track of time. She was so absorbed in her musings that she didn\'t hear him approach her, even though his boots made noises on the long blades of turf. When his hand touched her shoulder, she jumped with a startled yelp and looked up.

\'Do you have any idea just how long I\'ve been looking for you?\' he asked her, his tone neutral. She shook her head, waiting for her heart to slow down in her chest. She thought he would take her by the hand or arm and pull her up, but he didn\'t. He settled himself next to her on the ground and looked at the moon for a moment. \'It\'s lovely, but not nearly as lovely as you.\'

\'Poetry from the bastard?\' There was teasing laughter in her voice as she spoke. He shrugged and stretched his long legs out, propping his hands behind him to balance his weight on. The silence between them stretched for a long time before she sighed and spoke. \'Why didn\'t you come to me and ask me?\'

\' I was...... unsure if you would give me the truth or tell me what you thought I would want to hear,\' he replied, and she could hear the uncertainty in his voice. She could understand the insecurity. She\'d lived with it all her life.

\' I wouldn\'t lie to you about this. It\'s too important. Don\'t you know that I wouldn\'t lie to you at all? I\'d tell you the truth, no matter what it cost me,\' she whispered. She felt him shift, laying down fully. She turned to gaze down at his face in the silver glow of moon light that bathed them. She could see the vulnerability there, and it made her smile. The look of innocence was lost to a scowl then, and she had to laugh.

\'Laugh at me, will you, brat? I\'ll have to show you what I do to people who laugh at me!\' he snarled, then pulled her down on top of him. She was still laughing as he rolled her onto her back, laying himself over her. His mouth claimed hers in a bruising kiss that she knew was a mark of ownership. She was his, no matter what. He wasn\'t about to let her go. She moaned and slipped her arms around his shoulders, her fingers burying themselves in the softness of his hair.

Her breasts were flattened by his chest, his body molding itself to hers. His hips were cradled between her thighs, her legs shifting further apart so he could settle himself closer to her. She could feel his cock starting to swell, and she rubbed herself against him shamelessly. He groaned and pulled back. \'Don\'t do things like that,\' he begged.

\'Why not?\' she asked, running her hands down his back to his tight backside. Her fingers curled around the perfectly shaped globes, pressing him closer to her.

\'We happen to be in public,\' he hissed as she rocked her hips up into his. \'Someone might come along and see us.\'

\'And so what if they did?\' she grinned wickedly. He stared down at her in confusion. \'It would give you plenty of reason to scowl and stalk and snap and billow and take House points! They\'d find a reason to stay out of your personal life.\'

\'Like you did?\' he questioned, hitching an eye brow again. He noticed she had the grace to flush at his question, then she dragged his head down to hers and pressed her lips to his. He didn\'t resist, his tongue slipping between her half parted lips easily. She sucked on his tongue, her lips melded to his. Her nipples stabbed his chest, even through the layers of clothing they wore. He groaned against her mouth.

\'Please, Severus,\' she begged him, pulling her mouth from his. He leaned back so he could look at her. Her eyes were large in her face as she stared at him. \' I want to feel you inside of me. Here. Under the full moon. It\'s perfectly acceptable, you know. The ancient pagans used to make offerings this way.\'

Her face was what made him cave in to her desires. Her needs were displayed plainly in her green eyes, making them darken to almost black. He leaned his head forward, pressing his lips against hers again. His hands held her head as his hips ground against hers. She moaned loudly. He swallowed the sound. The thought that he was too old to be acting the horny teenager flitted briefly through his mind, but he pushed it away and concentrated on the woman laying beneath him.

A loud rumbling had him breaking away from her. He stared at her for a moment or two until the gurgling noise was heard again. She blushed and reached for him, but he moved back out of her reach. \'Tell me that that wasn\'t your stomach, brat,\' he instructed. She managed a sheepish look and he frowned. His hand took hers, pulling her to her feet as he went up on his,.

Her stomach rumbled again. Rather more loudly than previously. He leveled her a sharp gaze. \'Just when did you last eat, Kendra?\' he questioned, his eyes narrowing on her. She shrugged, avoiding his direct gaze. \'Answer me, young lady!\' he ordered gently.

\'Um, I nibbled on some dried toast this morning, but I\'ve been so busy that I\'ve not had a full meal since last night,\' she admitted softly. His hand forced her chin up, and the look in his eyes was one she\'d never seen before.

\'You will not starve yourself or our baby! Do you understand me?\' he ordered. She nodded as best she could with his hand holding her chin the way it was. \'Yes or no.\'

\'Yes, Severus,\' she replied softly. Her stomach growled again, loudly protesting it\'s lack of food. He took her hand in his and pulled her up. He dragged her along behind him, stalking across the pitch with angry strides. Kendra had to run to keep up with him. As they neared the goal, she managed to get out, \'My shoes.....\'

\'You haven\'t been reading your books, have you?\' he demended, cutting her off. They strode past the goal, her shoes forgotten where she had left them. \'Every bloody one of them says that you must eat! You need your strength. The child not only pulls great amounts of your energy, but also the food you eat.\'

They entered the Hall, and he pulled her along behind him toward the kitchens. He chastised her the entire way, spouting the facts he\'d pulled from Poppy\'s books. She grumbled to herself. She\'d forgotten what great attention he paid to detail. She could just imagine how many of the facts she would be hearing time and again over the duration of her pregnancy. Oh, bollocks! He\'d gone from being a cold bastard who was ignoring her to a conceited bastard who would bore her to death with a plethra of information. And all she\'d wanted was a nice long bout of love making under the moon. The goddess certainly had a twisted sense of humor.....

end chapter sixteen.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

all my thanks to my group of loyal readers and reviewers. you guys make me smile, big goofy grins that hurt my face. but i love you all anyway! ~hugs~xxx ~smoochies~ooo

never fear, chapter seventeen is already floating about my brain, just waiting for release. i\'ll try to have it up soon.