In a London House

Dear Harry,

I\'ve arrived at my destination without any problems. Unfortunately, I can\'t give you any details of my day so far, in case this letter falls into the wrong hands, but know that everything is going well.

I hope Tonks isn\'t giving you too much trouble (or you her) and that you use your time alone wisely. In other words: finish your homework, because I fear that once I return you won\'t have much spare time on your hands anymore.

Yours,

Remus


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Dear Remus,

Everything is fine here. Tonks isn\'t so bad, though it\'s more fun to have you around to watch me. And do other things with.

I\'m doing my homework (Herbology at the moment – boring!) so I should have it all done when you return. Not much else to say, really. It\'s quiet without you.

Yours,

Harry

P.S. I wanted to say that I\'m glad you let me see that thing we did the night before you left. I really liked it. So, thanks for that.

P.P.S. Miss you.


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Dear Harry,

I should hope you aren\'t doing these \'other things\' with Tonks. I\'m sure that even you, despite your youthful urges and enthusiasm, can control yourself around a lady for five days.

And I\'m glad to hear you\'re doing your homework, since I have other plans for the remaining time before you have to go back to Hogwarts, than watching you yawn over your schoolbooks.

Yours,

Remus

P.S. I won\'t say it was easy, because it wasn\'t. But it was an interesting experience and I\'m gladot tot to share it with you. I just think of it as yet another step towards closure, if there is such a thing.

P.P.S. I miss you too


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Dear Remus,

Don\'t worry about Tonks. She\'s not my type. And her being a lady has a lot to do with that. (And were you jealous there for a minute? If so, wicked!)

And would those plans you have for our remaining time together by any chance include rope? You know, with what I asked and you said during that thing we did.

Yours,

Harry

P.S. I don\'t know if there is such a thing as closure, either. And if there is, I don\'t think I want it. I do know that seeing him (and you) like that (before all the really bad stuff happened) was great. Plus, it was bloody hot.

And was my father always such a bastard so unfair?

P.P.S. I know I haven\'t really said anything about it to you before, but I am really glad we\'re doing those things together and that you want me in the same way I want you. I hadn\'t expected it, but I had hoped it, so I\'m really glad you wanted to give it a try.

P.P.P.S. I\'ve been wondering about this for a while...what\'s your middle name? I know it starts with a \'J\'. Is it James, like mine?


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Dear Harry,

I wouldn\'t call it jealousy, exactly, but let me just say that the thought of you doing those things with someone other than me makes me highly uncomfortable.

As I told you during \'that thing\', if you want to, we\'ll use those types of accessories. But only if you are sure, because it requires a great amount of trust. If you trust me, Harry, then yes, we can play our game that way. (That\'s not to say that I consider what is going on between us only a game. It\'s just an expression, since I\'m rather hesitant to call it by its true name in a letter.)

Yours,

Remus

P.S. Closure doesn\'t equal forgetting a loved one or discarding whatever relationship you had with him. I think that perhaps it means you\'re ready to move on. And I do believe we are doing exactly that.

And James, at that age, was indeed quite a bastard unfair. I suppose he was a bit spoiled, and it took him some time to accept that his best friend wanted to spend more time with someone other than him. He did change his attitude, though, as he grew older and more mature.

P.P.S. Thank you for telling me that. As you well know I fhesihesitant at first, for obvious reasons that have nothing to do with you and everything with me and my past, but I\'m also very glad that I gave it a try. I should be thanking you that you\'re willing to give an old man like me a chance.

P.P.P.S. John.


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Dear Remus,

You\'re jealous! Admit it!

I do trust you. As a matter of fact, you\'re one of the few people I really trust. So, yeah, I want to try that. I\'ve been thinking about it for a while and I think it would be brilliant. I have no idea why, though, other than that the idea of it turns me on. And I know you don\'t see what is going on between us as a game, but I do wonder what would be so bad about other people knowing about it. I mean, what\'s the worst that could happen?

Yours,

Harry

P.S. I\'m glad I can move on with you. And I\'m glad you want to move on with me. I know it must be hard for you and confusing, probably. I find it confusing, often. Not us so much, but the idea that if Sirius was still here you wouldn\'t want to be with me.

And I\'m glad to hear my father got over it. I thought he was being a bit unfair to you and Sirius.

P.P.S. You\'re not old. I like it that you know so much and want to show it to me. And I think you\'re very sexy.

P.P.P.S. Remus John?? That sounds...odd.


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Dear Harry,

I will not, under any circumstances, admit that I\'m jealous. Personally, I like to think of myself as territorial. That does have a much better ring to it.

Using those accessories can indeed be quite arousing, if not liberating. It\'s hard to explain that on paper, so I\'d much rather just show you once I\'m back.

As for what the worst is that could happen? Harry, you are technically still a child, at least in the eyes of wizarding law. I\'m a werewolf with a distinct lack of human rights. If the wrong people were to find out about the things we\'ve been doing, they\'d ship me off to Azkaban on child molestation charges and you\'d be placed under custody of Ministry Child Services. Is that bad enough for you? Because it surely is for me.

Yours,

Remus

P.S. There is no easy answer to that. The truth is that I don\'t know what would have happened had Sirius still been here. What I do know is that Sirius is dead, and as much as that hurts, it\'s how it is. What I also know is that I\'m happy to be doing those things with you, Harry, and not just those things. It\'s more than that. I enjoy being with you, in every way.

P.P.S. What you lack in experience, you make up for in enthusiasm. Which makes you very sexy as well. And experience is an easy thing to get. Just do it often. And I believe you\'re well on your way of becoming quite the experienced young man.

P.P.P.S. You can blame that on my Muggle mother. My father, a wizard, insisted in Remus, and my mother then added a perfectly good Muggle name to that.


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Dear Remus,

I like territorial. I like the idea that you don\'t want anyone else touching me but you. (It makes me hard.)

And fuck...I had no idea about that. I can\'t lose you as well. I\'d rather not do those things with you and still have you around than have them take you away from me. Bloody hell, this makes things really complicated, doesn\'t it?

Yours,

Harry

P.S. I enjoy being with you as well, in every way. It\'s just that, everything changed when Sirius died. I didn\'t want him to die. But then I got you, and I can\'t help thinking that if Sirius were still alive I wouldn\'t have you, and I want you so much, so that makes me wonder if I\'m happy Sirius is dead.

P.P.S. I really like it that we do those things so often. I had no idea it would be so good. I mean, I had thought about it a lot and fantasized about it when I wanked, but had never expected that actually doing it would be so great and would make me feel so good.

P.P.P.S. So you\'re a half-blood then, like me?


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Dear Harry,

I know we haven\'t discussed this yet, and I\'m not even sure if we should, since I don\'t want to restrict you. You\'re still so young to be making commitments, so I\'m not sure if I can expect this of you. But I do consider what we have to be a relationship, how clandestine it might be and...oh, forget I said anything.

Harry, breathe. That little story I sketched is the worst case scenario. But I do hope it has made it clear that we should be careful, at least until you turn seventeen next year and are considered an adult. And don\'t worry. I won\'t let anyone take me away from you. I can\'t lose you either.

Yours,

Remus

P.S. God, Harry. It has changed everything and there is no saying what would have happened had Sirius not died. But he did. And it hurt us both. And just because it brought us together doesn\'t mean you don\'t wish Sirius was still alive. Losing someone is never easy. Relationships in general are never easy. Our situation is far from easy, but that doesn\'t mean that I don\'t want it or that you don\'t make you happy. I want you and you make me a very happy man. I hope that will be enough for you.

P.P.S. It\'s sex, Harry. It\'s supposed to make you feel good. But I\'m glad to hear I can make you feel that way. I can assure you that you make me feel good as well. Every single time we have sex.

P.P.P.S. Yes, I\'m a half-blood. Just like you. As for something completely different: have you been feeding Hedwig properly? She looks a bit...tired.


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Dear Remus,

Okay, let me sum everything up we\'ve been writing to each other, because all those different points are starting to confuse me (and correct me if I\'m wrong).

I want you. You want me. I want to have sex with you. You want to have sex with me. I only want you and no one else. You only want me and no one else. As long as we are careful, at least until I\'m seventeen, we can be in a relationship together. We both miss Sirius and we both wish he was still alive, but he isn\'t, so we deal.

Maybe it\'s not as confusing as I thought it was.

Yours,

Harry

P.S. What would Sirius have thought of this? You and me together, having sex?

P.P.S. I miss you! Really a lot. I\'ve wanked four times today already and I still get hard thinking about you and your cock inside my arse and you fucking me. I love it when you fuck me. I love to feel your cock inside me. I love to suck your cock. I love kissing you. You\'re very good at kissing, much better than Cho was. You really make me happy.

P.P.P.S. I\'ve been feeding her enough, but she does look a bit tired. I\'ll make sure to feed her a whole bag of owl treats once you get home.


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Dear Harry,

You got it in one.

Yours,

Remus

P.S. He\'d probably want to join in.

P.P.S. I\'m certainly flattered that you think me a better kisser than Ms Chang. As for the rest: don\'t stop. I enjoy reading it. (Because I miss you too and I find myself aroused as well at certain times during the day.)


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Dear Remus,

I\'m playing with myself as I write this letter. I\'m touching my cock while I think of you. I stroke it really slowly and imagine it\'s your hand. I love your hands; they\'re strong and it feels so incredible when you touch my prick. I also love it when you touch my sac while you suck my cock. I love feeling your mouth around my prick. You do really wicked things with your tongue and it\'s so bloody hot to see my cock sliding in and out of your mouth. And watching you swallow my come when I climax...and tasting it on your tongue when you kiss me. God, Remus, you make me so fucking hard.

But what really, really turns me on is feeling your tongue on my arse. Feeling it lick me there and push inside just a bit. Fuck, that\'s so hot. I really want to do that with you sometime. I want to lick you there, Remus. Push my fingers inside you and feel how tight and hot it is. And then fuck you. I really want to shove my cock inside you and fuck you so hard like you always fuck me. Do you like to be fucked hard? From what I could tell during that thing we did, you seemed to enjoy it a lot, being fucked hard.

I want to fuck you hard, Remus. And then I want you to tie me down and shag me senseless. Just thinking about it is enough for me to....

Yours,

Harry

P.S. That made me laugh. But it also makes me wish I\'d have had more time with him, to really get to know him. I don\'t think I knew him all that well, and I wish I did.

P.P.S. Sorry about the stains and that the text is a bit smudged, but the Weasleys are here and supper is read I h I have no time to copy it onto a clean sheet of parchment. Gotta run. See you soon!


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Dear Harry,

Thank you. That was a most enjoyable letter and I think I\'ll read it again a few times before I leave for London tonight. This will be my last letter and the next time we talk it will be while I tear your robes off and fuck you against the wall of your bedroom. We won\'t even make it to the bed, Harry. I\'m going to take you right there, feel that tight arse of yours around me. And after we come, I\'m going to fuck you again, this time on the floor. We still won\'t make it to the bed, Harry. When we finally do make it to the bed, I\'ll get up on my hands and knees for you so you can lick my arse and fuck me hard.

Yes, I enjoy being fucked hard. Only a few more hours. I can\'t wait.

Yours,

Remus

P.S. I wish you would have had the chance to get to know Sirius better as well, Harry. Despite his flaws, he was a good man, and he cared about you a lot. I\'ve talked to Dumbledore about getting a pensieve and he said he might be able to obtain one for me.

P.P.S. I didn\'t mind those stains one bit. You\'ll notice a few of smudges of my own on this letter. Tonight, Harry. I\'ll see you very soon.