At the Shore of The Heart

Familiar faces smiled at her as she walked back onto the ward, and she inhaled deeply. The fresh clean smell put her immediately into work mode, and through habit, she checked her hair was securely fastened and smoothed her apron, then walked to the nurses’ station.



Megan greeted her with a huge smile. ‘Madame Granger, it’s lovely to have you back,’ she said warmly, ‘and you look great too. Nice tan.’



Hermione smiled at her softly.’ Thank you Megan. It’s nice to be back. Now, who do we have?’



Hermione wasn’t in the mood for small talk or sharing stories of her time away. She was anticipating many questions, but she didn’t want to be reminded of her holiday. In particular she didn’t want to be reminded of Severus. She was in week four of her plan to move on, and she was failing dismally.



At first, she had given him space. She had understood how confused and guilty he would be, making love to someone who wasn’t his wife. So, she came back from Italy with her head held high and her crotch still throbbing at the memory of their night together. She had written him a chatty ‘it’s okay Severus, let’s just be friends’ note, and then waited a few weeks. She had even taken another trip on her own, to France, from where she sent him a postcard, telling him she was having a lovely time but the coffee wasn’t as good as Italy. But the truth was, she didn’t have a lovely time. She had been miserable without him, and although she did all the things she wanted to do, it would have been so much nicer if he had been there to share it with her. It was when she returned to her empty house, and realised there was no letter back from Severus, that her stomach began to tie itself into knots and she finally started to acknowledge that what she felt for Severus was more than just friendship. And it devastated her.



She had taken to her bed with her quill and a sheaf of parchment, and written to him every other day for two weeks. She tried to keep her letters chatty and bright, telling him she was returning to work soon and it would be lovely to see him before she started back. She invited him to the Opera when she saw that Madame Butterfly was coming to Covent Garden. Then she got very angry, and called him a stubborn bastard, who had indeed abused her friendship. But the tears that had fallen onto this letter had given her away, and Severus had felt her pain as he read it.



And Hermione knew she had fallen in love with him then, and didn’t write for three days. On the fourth day, she told him the truth. That she was in love with him, that she missed him and longed for him, but that this would be his last chance. If he wanted her friendship or anything more from her, he needed to tell her, or she would move on. Because she couldn’t live like this any more.



Hermione still heard nothing, and a gaping hole of pain and rejection settled itself in her stomach and refused to budge.



*****



In the canteen at lunchtime, Hermione picked at her salad half-heartedly and didn’t look up when she felt someone sit down opposite her. A slight cough told her who it was, and she fixed a false smile onto her face and raised her eyes slowly.



‘Hello Edward,’ she said.



‘Wow,’ he breathed, ‘you look incredible.’



‘It’s just the tan. It will fade before long, and I will just look the same as normal,’ she laughed slightly.



‘I’ve missed you, Hermione,’ his eyes flashed at her and she got his meaning immediately.



‘You’ve missed the sex, you mean?’ she grinned at him and arched her eyebrow, and was gratified when Edward blushed deep red from his collar to his hairline.



‘That was uncalled for,’ he muttered and started to eat his curry and rice.



‘I’m sorry. You’re right. I was only teasing,’ she said softly, and her spark in her eyes faded a little as she remembered that she missed the sex too. But not with Edward.



‘Is there someone?’ he said softly, not looking at her.



‘There was,’ she answered.



‘Ah,’ he replied.



Hermione stood and lifted her tray. ‘Goodbye Edward,’ she murmured, and then walked to place her uneaten lunch on the trolley. She walked back to ward slowly, chewing on her lip unconsciously and wondering how long it would take for the hole in her stomach to disappear.







********



Poor Hermione... I know she may seem a little OC, but she\'s in love and helpless....