Meant to Be

This is one year after the Final Battle. Obviously, Remus doesn\'t die - things are as they should have been. Damn Jo!



Chapter Fifteen



***Five years later***



‘You’d be perfect for the job, Remus,’ Kingsley Shacklebolt said, trying to persuade the man.

‘I don’t know,’ Remus said, shaking his head. ‘What about Teddy? I’ll have to find a sitter every day and pay them…’

‘We have a free facility for Ministry employee’s children,’ Kingsley said, sitting forward in his chair. ‘Teddy will love it - playing with the other children all day; and you’d be doing some good, Remus. Helping people in similar situations to yours.’



Remus sighed and frowned. The job sounded fantastic: regular work, time off without penalty for his transformations, doing something useful and free care for his son while he did it. But Kingsley was a friend and he didn’t want to be offered a job out of pity.

‘Why are you offering this to me?’ he asked. ‘I don’t have any qualifications to work in this type of job. While I do appreciate you thinking of me, I don’t want your charity, Kingsley.’

‘Believe me, it’s not charity, Remus. Your department head will be working you like a dog if you take this,’ he said in his slow deep voice. ‘I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I didn’t think of you immediately when the job came up. Your name was put forward by someone else and, as soon as it was, I agreed that you were the best person for the job. Who else could do this job as effectively as someone who knows what these clients are going through? That, and the NEWT levels you got all those years ago at Hogwarts, are all the qualifications you need.’



Remus frowned again, but was very tempted now to take the offered position in the Ministry. The position involved making contact with lycanthropes and talking them through their fears or concerns they had or problems they were having. He would be their support person; their link to the Ministry and the person who could help get the most out of the new Ministry anti discrimination legislation. He wished there had been someone like that around when he had been bitten. He smiled and nodded at his friend.



‘Alright,’ he said, standing up and holding out his hand. ‘I’ll take the job. Thank you, Kingsley.’

The Minister rose and shook his hand. ‘It’s not me you need to thank,’ he said, coming around the desk and walking to the door, Remus following. ‘It’s your boss - our fairly new Department Head. She put your name forward when she convinced me there was a need for the position. I’ll take you to meet her now. I know you are just getting over a full moon, but can you start tomorrow? There’s space for Teddy in the nursery. I checked - just in case.’

Remus nodded vaguely, a bit overwhelmed.



Remus walked alongside the tall man as they move to the elevators. ‘How does she know who I am?’ he asked as they stepped inside. Kingsley looked puzzled. ‘Your new Department Head - how does she know me?’

‘You taught her at school apparently,’ Kingsley said as the elevator dropped down two floors. ‘She’s pretty young to head up a department, but very smart and very dedicated to the job. Even eats most meals at her desk. I must talk to her about that again, actually. She’s going to burn out and she’s too good to lose.’

The elevator doors opened again, the operator announcing they were at ’The Department of Magical Creatures’ and they stepped out.



‘So, what’s her name so I don’t make an idiot of myself in front of my new boss?’ Remus asked as they walked through a maze of mainly deserted desks, heading for a door off to the back of the room.

‘Jessica Mather,’ Kingsley said, waving at a man who greeted him from across the room. ‘She only started here six months ago but she’s managed to pull this place together. I’d promote her to my office if I thought for a second she’d accept. Stay on your toes around her, Remus, she’ll be Minister for Magic one day.’



Remus smiled but felt some nerves. It sounded like his new boss was pretty tough, and it had been a long time since he’d had a proper job - since his teaching job at Hogwarts actually. He tried to remember Jessica Mather; his jaw clenching when the only Jessica he could remember was Jessica Cooper - his Jess.

‘No,’ he told himself. ‘Not my Jess. She hasn’t been my Jess for a long time.’

There was another Jessica that year, although he couldn’t remember her last name. She was in Sixth Year, and pretty bossy if he recalled correctly, so the young woman Kingsley was describing could be her. It’d be too much to hope for that it could be his Jess - and, if it was her, he didn’t want to think about the reasons behind the change in surname.



They approached a single desk by itself and the older woman there looked up as she packed up for the day.

‘Good evening, Minister,’ she said, standing up when she saw Kingsley.

‘Hello, Martha,’ he said with a smile. ‘Is Jessica still here? I didn’t realise it was so late.’

She nodded with a grimace. ‘Of course she is,’ she said. ‘I don’t think she’s left on time once in the last six months.’

Kingsley smiled and introduced Remus before the woman left. Kingsley knocked on the door and they heard a muffled, ‘Come on in, Martha.’



He pushed open the door and saw a deserted desk before they heard a metallic slam from off to the right. Both men turned and Remus felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room.

‘Jess,’ he whispered, his mouth falling open as he stared at his former fiancée. Jess also looked a bit taken aback but soon overcame her surprise.

‘Hello, Remus, Kingsley,’ she said softly, moving away from the filing cabinet to stand in front of them. She looked tiny next to Kingsley.



‘Does this mean you‘ve accepted the job?’ she asked with a glance at Kingsley.

‘Yes, he has,’ Kingsley said, staring at a gob smacked Remus. Jess nodded and gave Remus a closed mouth smile.

‘I’m glad,’ she said, her face revealing a little insecurity. ‘You’ll be perfect for this job, Remus.’

He nodded, trying to pull himself together. ‘So Kingsley told me,’ he said, then cleared his throat when he heard how scratchy his voice was.

‘Well,’ said Kingsley, looking confusedly from Jess to Remus. ‘I might leave you in Jessica’s capable hands, Remus, and she can tell you more about the position. Don’t stay too late tonight, Jessica.’

She smiled at him as he left, closing the door behind him.



There were several seconds of silence then Jess took a deep breath. ‘I should show you where your desk is…’ she began but he interrupted her.

‘You got married?’ he asked, annoyed with the jolt of jealousy that shot through him.

Jess frowned but nodded. ‘I did,’ she confirmed. ‘And then we got our bond broken. About eighteen months ago.’

Remus felt his heart beat speed up and tried to hide his delight that she was no longer married.



She looked at him, debating with herself for a moment before making a decision. ‘I was sorry to hear you lost your wife in the war,’ she said, her voice low. ‘That must have been devastating, Remus. For you and your son.’

His jaw clenched as he thought of his late wife, Tonks. ‘It was difficult,’ he said, finding it hard to talk to Jess about the woman he’d married. ‘But it’s been a year now and I’m moving on. Teddy, my son, doesn’t remember her - I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or bad. How did you know…?’

She gave him a small smile. ‘This place is a hotbed of gossip,’ she told him. ‘If Martha doesn’t know about it, it never happened.’



He smiled and looked at Jess, unable to stop the words escaping. ‘You look beautiful, Jess,’ he said, feeling heat crawl over his skin when she flushed. She gave him another closed mouth smile and blinked several times, feeling overwhelmed.

‘You look good too,’ she said so quietly he hardly heard her.

‘How…how have you been?’ he asked, feeling a bit emotional now himself.

‘Well, the answer to that question depends on how long you’ve got,’ she replied. ‘But, generally, fine. How about you? I mean, obviously the last year must have been awful but before that….’

‘I think I’ll steal your answer,’ he said with a smile that make Jess’ knees go weak.



She let out a shaky breath and moved to the door. ‘Come and I’ll show you where your desk is,’ she said. He followed her to a desk not far from her office. It already had several files on it.

‘Sorry,’ she said when he touched the stack. ‘You’re going to have to hit the ground running. I’ve been doing what is now your job for six months as well as trying to do my own work. Unfortunately, I’ve not been doing either job well so I’m very glad to have you here.’

Remus smiled and Jess felt an all too familiar ache begin in her body. ‘I find it hard to believe you wouldn’t do a job well, Jess,’ he said and she smiled back at him, Remus’ breath disappearing from his lungs.



‘I hope you don’t mind that I put your name forward for this job,’ Jess said tentatively. ‘I don’t want you to get the wrong idea about why I did it…’

‘Why did you suggest me?’ he asked, knowing what answer he wanted her to give, but doubting she would.

‘Because I needed someone who could say ‘I know what you mean’ to the clients and actually really understand instead of just trying to - they deserve that respect; because I know that you have the temperament required for this job; and because I know you’d be amazing, and happy that you were doing something to help people in the same position you were once in.’

Even though he wasn’t expecting her to say she’d wanted to see him, he was still disappointed that her reasons were business only.



Someone called goodnight across the room to Jess and she waved back, both of them realising they were alone now. ‘You’d better get going,’ she said, checking her watch. ‘It’s getting late. Did Kingsley show you where the nursery was for your little boy?’ When Remus shook his head, she bit her lip. ‘Um, well if you want to, you could bring him here tomorrow before you start and I can take you up there,’ she offered, not sure she wanted to meet the child he’d had with another woman.

‘Thanks, Jess,’ he said. ‘I’ll do that.’

‘Well, I’ll see you tomorrow, I guess,’ she said, moving back towards her office.

‘You will,’ he said, turning and walking back to the main door. He turned to look back at her and saw her do the same. She smiled quickly at him and shut the door to her office. Remus smiled as well and left the Ministry for The Burrow, where Teddy was being looked after by Molly Weasley.



‘How was he?’ he asked, taking his grinning son out of Molly’s arms.

Teddy said, ‘DaDa!’ when he saw him. He was starting to talk, Remus amazed at how quickly he was growing up.

‘Very well behaved,’ she said, smiling affectionately at the toddler. ‘So…did you take the job?’

Remus nodded. ‘How could I say no?’ he said, tickling Teddy and watching his hair turn bright blue as it always did when he was happy. The little boy squirmed and Remus put him down, watching him run stiffly into the living room.

‘Harry’s in there visiting,’ Molly said. ’You’ll stay for dinner of course.’

Remus nodded in agreement, murmuring his thanks then walked through to the other room.



‘Hey, Remus,’ Harry said, handing Teddy a stuffed bear.

‘Hi Harry,’ he replied, watching Teddy whack his godfather across the legs with the toy. ‘You took the job, I assume,’ Harry said and Remus nodded.

‘So,’ said Harry, leaning forward with a grin. ‘Jessica Mather is going to be your boss then?’

Remus looked startled. ‘You know Jess?’ he asked and Harry nodded, his grin broadening.

‘I remember you introducing us in my Third Year at school, and I met her again when she started at the Ministry. Kingsley bought her around to meet the Heads of Departments and I ran into her,’ he said. ‘She remembered meeting me at Hogwarts, and I must admit I was flattered. And of course I remembered her. She‘s pretty hard to forget.’

He frowned and said quickly, ‘But don’t tell Ginny I said that.’



Remus smiled distractedly and Harry stared at him, then said hesitantly, ‘You know, back at school, there was a rumour for a while that you and Jessica were, um, involved.’

Remus frowned and his guilt showed in his face. Harry sat up straighter in his chair, his mouth falling open as he stared at Remus.

‘Was it true?’ he demanded. ‘Were you two….?’

Remus sighed and nodded.

Harry let out a disbelieving breath. ‘Are you serious?’ he said. ‘You slept with a student?’



‘She was twenty at the time,’ Remus said defensively, standing and beginning to pace. ‘She was of age - not a child. We met before Hogwarts and…got involved. It did continue on while I was her teacher. I’m not proud of my actions, Harry. Regardless of everything else, she was my student and I shouldn’t have been so weak but…I fell in love with her.’

He stopped pacing and closed his eyes, feeling the familiar twist in his stomach when he thought about Jess and how hard he’d fallen for her. ‘She felt the same and I asked her to marry me.’

Harry stared at Remus as if he’d never seen him before. He’d never discussed his relationship with Jess with anyone except Sirius and Tonks.



‘You obviously didn’t get married. What happened?’ he asked gently. Remus shook his head.

‘She left me,’ he said softly, sinking back down onto the seat. ‘I kept things from her. All the stuff from my past: your parents, Sirius. I didn’t trust her enough to talk to her about it. I was stupidly trying to protect myself - people I trusted always let me down, and I didn’t see any reason Jess wouldn’t do the same. She wouldn’t have. It was the biggest mistake of my life, Harry. I’ve always regretted it.’



Harry was watching him closely. ‘You still care about her,’ he said, not asking but making a statement. It was obvious Remus still had feelings for her. The older man looked at Harry then nodded.

‘Yeah, I do,’ he admitted then looked down at his son, playing with a set of trains on the floor. ‘Don’t get me wrong, Harry. I did love Tonks. But…it was never the same as Jess. We just connected in a way that I never have with anyone else. We were amazing together.’

He saw Harry grin broadly and he blushed. ‘I didn’t mean that way,’ he said hurriedly, then smiled as Harry laughed.

‘Yeah alright,’ he said. ‘We were pretty incredible like that as well. Really incredible actually.’



‘Are you going to ask her out again?’ Harry asked, then winced as Teddy ran the train into his foot.

‘I don’t know,’ he said, standing and picking up his son. ‘A lot has happened over the past five years, but…we still connect. I felt it tonight, as strong as it ever was.’

He looked at his son. ‘A lot has changed though.’

Molly called them for dinner and Harry stood. ‘It’s been a year since Tonks died, Remus,’ the younger man said. ‘She wouldn’t want you to be unhappy. I think she’d be glad that you and Jess found each other again.’

Remus smiled and said, ‘I think we’re getting a bit ahead of ourselves. I don’t have a clue if Jess is interested in pursuing a relationship with me again. I know her marriage bond has been broken, but that doesn’t mean she’d want to start up with me again. I….I hurt her last time.’

Harry shrugged. ‘It’s worth a try, isn’t it?’ he said, as they walked into the kitchen. ‘What have you got to lose?’



An hour later, he apparated to his house, putting a sleeping Teddy down in his crib. He grabbed a bottle of Firewhiskey and poured a glass, thinking about Jess.

‘She’s gorgeous,’ he thought, his eyes closing as images of her entered his mind. Her hair was shorter, just brushing her shoulders now, and her face was thinner and a little more mature looking, but otherwise she hadn’t changed.

‘She still turns me on like nothing else,’ he thought, feeling his body stir recalling how hot they used to be together.



It had taken him a long time to stop trying to contact her, finally giving up when he heard she’d left the country a year after they’d broken up. By then, Voldemort had returned and the Order of the Phoenix had reformed and he was distracted by the tasks Dumbledore set him. Then, Sirius died and Tonks had told him how she felt about him and he tried for nearly twelve months to avoid a relationship with her. He finally relented after Dumbledore died, figuring that life was short and he needed to move on and forget about Jess. Tonks, as a Metamophmagus, understood what it was like to be different. They kind of fell into bed together one night after Albus’ death and it had been good. Not like he and Jess, but still good. And when she proposed, he accepted. They married quickly, only a month after that first night together and Tonks had fallen pregnant fast, and against his wishes.



He was worried throughout the pregnancy that Teddy would inherit his lycanthropy, but he hadn’t, instead immediately showing signs of being a Metamorphmagus like his mother. They’d been happy together for a while after their son was born, and when Tonks had been killed a year ago in the final battle against Voldemort, it had hurt - a lot. He did love her; it might not have been as strong or all consuming like he’d felt with Jess but it was love. And he’d been upset that Teddy would never know his mother, and terrified at how he would now cope as a single parent. Thank god for the support of his friends - he couldn’t have gotten through the last year without them.



Now, here was Jess again, coming into his life when he was ready to move on. He smiled then yawned, standing and pulling off his shirt as he moved into his bedroom. They had always been pushed together. He’d told her once it was fate. He threw himself onto his bed and pulled the sheets up. One thing was for sure. This new job certainly wouldn’t be dull with Jess as his boss. He let out a laugh. The tables had turned. She was now the one in the position of power. This really would be interesting.