Make It Right

Tom had just snuck away from the party to nurse a thrumming headache. Lily and Lilith had flooed to Jessica’s only a few minutes ago as the little girl was starting to tire. The party had been a greater strain, both mentally and physically than he had thought it would be.

The source of all his problems was the simple reason that Cassander had forgotten to tell him that the Black’s were coming. He was pretty sure the ferret had done it on purpose. Orion and Tom had been close friends in school, and they still were, they just didn’t show it. The entire act was to protect one little boy, Sirius Black, but naturally Cassander did not know that. Cathy and Cassander just wanted to reconcile the two friends. Tom and Orion were fine as most could see, but when Sirius had thrown himself in Toms arms and hugged him tightly, Cassander – and everyone else save Lilith- had seen something they considered themselves fools for not seeing before.

Tom hadn’t left Britain and practically gone into hiding for a year because he felt bad about Lilith, or the budding war, or a backlash from his schooldays, like they first had thought. The tension had been neck high, luckily none of the children or Lilith had noticed, the Auror had been an entirely different matter though, but they trusted her not to be stupid enough to open her mouth.

Leaning his head against the cold red Egyptian marble in the bathroom on the second floor, Tom tried to banish the pain and prepare for the onslaught he knew was coming.

Resting his cheek on the sink he calmly counted down from ten. He knew that this day would come. He had hoped that it wouldn’t, but he had known Cassander was not dumb enough to not to see it the second he saw them together, which was why Tom and the Blacks had never attended the same parties. It just figured that it had to be mucked up somehow.

Three…two…one…

“Tom?” He had heard the clicking heels of Cassanders shoes echoing down the halls. Marble floors…everything was marble in this house. Both Tom and Cassander could sit on the stairs for hours when they were teenagers, just looking at the light shining through the glass dome in the ceiling reflecting off the colourful halls and perfectly polished floors.

“Hm?” He didn’t lift his head from the cool stone, desperately avoiding the stormy grey eyes he knew would be filled with confusion, pain and anger.

“Why did you leave?” Tom couldn’t say anything. The tears that had been pooling dripped from the stand and onto the floor. He knew that Cassander could see them. “Was it because of me?” Tom just turned his head away. He couldn’t let him see how much this hurt him. Slowly he turned to walk out the door. Anything he would give not to have this conversation. Ever.

Cassander gripped him tightly and lifted Tom to sit on the stand, leaning against the mirror. With expert ease he moved between his thighs and caught his wrists in one hand. Gently he nudged Tom chin up, forcing him to face him.

“Look at me.” He whispered. “Look at me.” He said more sternly when Tom didn’t abide. Again he nudged his chin up and finally Tom looked at him. The fury in Cassanders eyes melted away when he saw the sore green eyes peering up at him. He had never really thought about how much smaller Tom was than him, or about how much the abuse he had suffered growing up had not just affected his psyche, but also his physical form. He was not a small guy, but Cassander was very sure of that he would have been bigger if he had been fed properly growing up and during the summers.

Cassander sighed and released Tom wrists, but placed his and on either side of the dark haired man, still holding him in place.

“Tell me.” Even before the two words left his lips he could see the tears forming. It was obvious that he was not going to get a word out him. He should know better that try to make him talk when he was in this state. Nodds and headshakes was the most he had ever received.

“Were you…” His voice faltered. “Were you pregnant?” Tom looked away and nodded. “Sirius?” He nodded again. A dry sob escaped Cassander as he pulled the smaller brunette close.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he croaked. Tom wrapped his arms on his shoulders and buried his face in the nape of his neck.

“I didn’t want to ruin anything.” Tom whispered, afraid of that if he spoke louder his voice would crack. “You were married, and Cathy had just announced her pregnancy...” A tear rolled onto Cassanders crisp white shirt and dampened the cotton. “I didn’t want to shame you.”

Cassander knew very well the marital ethics of purebloods; marry, have an heir, take as many lovers as you like, but be discrete. Siring a child is not discrete and he had disgraced his wife, but Cassander could not bring himself to care about any of it.

“Nothing is more important to me that you. Nothing. I thought you left because you were angry with me.”

“I was having a baby. Of course I was angry.” Came the muffled answer. “I missed you so much. Especially when the hormones kicked in.” He chuckled weakly. Cassander just tightened his arms around the lithe form and sighed. Tom shivered at the feel of the warm puffs of air against his skin and unconsciously tightened his thighs around Cassanders hips.

“When you came back you were so distant, I didn’t know what to do.”

“You looked so happy with your wife and Lucy…”

“I was happy with Lucius, but I love you, and Merlin knows Cathy doesn’t have stamina worth a knut. We haven’t shared a bed since Luc was conceived and we probably wont ever again.”

“Probably?”

“If she wants another kid, but I doubt it.” He sighed. “I missed you so much.” Cassander said and kissed Toms neck lightly. He didn’t miss the shiver it caused and kissed him again. Tom’s breath hitched and instinctively held on tighter. Cassander could feel him heating up and it aroused him to no end.

Their relationship had never been that of lovers, nor that of brothers, but something in between. Cassanders touch would drive away Toms demons like patronuses drive away dementors. He was his Guardian and their bond was stronger that anything.

Tom didn’t expect Lilith to understand why he needed Cassander so much, why she could not be his anchor like other wives would be to their husbands. He knew that she wanted to be his wife, and he would for fill that wish because he did love her, she was his mate, and he wanted to be with her, but she would never be his anchor, not like Cassander.

With a gentle ‘pop’ they disappeared.


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A/N i know this is messy, but i needed this chapter to explain a few things.....

IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

?You will not believe what i just did. i feel so stupid!! you see. i have two documents for each story, ,one for what im writing and one for what is ready to be published, well, i forgot to copy the chapter after ' I Forgot My...Oh' - the one wherre Jessie explains all about how thwy are different in other ways and not just magic (for the new reader, thats the chapter after next, im talking about) so if anyone appened to copy it into word or something- i do that loads when i want to read away from somewhere with internet- i'd be so bloody happy if you'd send it to me, cause otherwise we'll be missing a chapter, and that is never good.

i know i fucked up, but please, HELP!!!!