Life and Its Mysteries

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Chapter 14



Hermione was seated on the couch, in the room, up in the Astronomy Tower. The tears hadn’t stopped flowing from her eyes a single bit, but only got worse. In one hand, she still held on to the baseball, while in the other, she was holding her cell phone.



On her cell, she was watching videos that she had recorded in the past with the camera built into it. All the videos had Tobi in them, and in some of them, Bill was present. He was playing with him, or goofing around—all in all, just having fun.



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They all were in a small park, not far from Hermione’s apartment. Under a group of trees, they were able to find shelter from the sun. The weather wasn’t too hot, but just right.



Bill squatted down a few meters away from Tobi, and placed his gloved hand right below his chin. “Pitch it right here Slugger,” he told Tobi as he folded the glove a few times in his hand.



With his Yankee cap on backwards on his head, Tobi’s eyes narrowed as he looked at his target. He then pitched the ball as best as he could at it. To his dismay, his throw was short.



“Again,” Bill said as he tossed the ball gently back.



After a few soft bounces on the grass, Tobi managed to catch the ball in his small glove. “You’re far,” he said aloud.



Bill shook his head. “I’m not Tobs. This is how far I was last time, and you threw me a fast ball. You can do it again, and throw me another just like before alright?”



Tobi stood up straight, focused, and readied himself for his next pitch.



“For a clean, no hitter game against the Cubs,” Bill started to speak like an announcer, “can Tobias Ethan Snape throw in this last pitch, making history for the Yankees? He looks at his catcher, shaking his head and then nodding. What will it be? A curve ball or a fast one? And here it comes…”



Tobi threw the ball as hard as he could, directly into Bill’s glove.



“And the Yankees win!” Bill shouted as he ran towards Tobi, carrying him and raising him up highly into the air.



“Win! Win!” Tobi shouted out loud happily.



Soon enough, Tobi was given a small bat as Bill pitched at him. With the aid of some magic, the ball had slowed its momentum and velocity greatly. This allowed Tobi to have higher chances of hitting the ball.



“Tobias Ethan Snape, future star player of the Yankees!” Bill said aloud as he stood tall with Tobi on his shoulders. When he turned to face Hermione and the camera, he smiled. “Wave at Mummy, Slugger.”



“Hi Mummy!” Tobi said as he waved at her and the camera.



“Hi Mummy!” Bill mimicked Tobi.



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Severus remained standing next to the door as he had watched Hermione for some time. After leaving Albus’s office, he had followed her silently. Though part of him wanted to comfort Hermione, another part of him was telling him to give her space. Plus, he wasn’t sure what he was feeling at the moment—some shock and some anger perhaps. All the emotions that he was feeling made him feel numbed with confusion.



He had a child—a son that he knew absolutely nothing of. It felt somewhat similar to what he felt with Alex before. He felt as if he was robbed the right of becoming a father.



For the second time that day, Severus felt his stop when he heard his son’s voice from the videos that Hermione was watching. Clearly, the boy sounded like he was having fun with his godfather, and he obviously enjoyed playing baseball. He couldn’t help but feel jealous and thought that it had to be him that was taking part in playing with his son. After all, he was Tobi’s father, even though it was truly hard to imagine him being in the position—taking his son out to parks, playing ball, and whatever else more. Hard to imagine, but he could be that man—that father.



Severus’s trail of thought was broken when he heard glass shatter. His head snapped up as he looked at the wall, noticing that remnants of a vial and its contents were sliding down to the floor. “You should have just drunk that instead,” he stated firmly, making his presence known.



Hermione turned to look at Severus, walking towards her. Through her tears, she could see the anger on his face. She didn’t anything, and knew what was about to come. The pain in her knee was starting to grow, but she needed to feel a different kind of pain, besides emotional pain.



“Why didn’t you tell me I fathered a child?” Severus asked, with the sound of venom in his voice.



Hermione looked down at the phone and placed it right next to her thigh, along with the baseball. She shook her head, not wanting to fight. She already was angry at herself.



“Why?” Severus bellowed. His anger was boiling more with every passing second. “Do you think that I had no right to know? I have every right! You were obviously with a child when we were still together, and yet you didn’t tell me. Damn you Hermione!”



“Damn me?!” Hermione shouted as she stood up, raising her head high to look at him. “You broke my heart Severus! You were the idiot that pushed me away. You said you didn’t love me, and didn’t want a family with me, and all that other hurtful crap, remember? Do not forget that it was you who broke it off!”



“But you were pregnant and you didn’t tell me-“



“I didn’t know until I was in New York. If I knew I was pregnant, I would have told you!”



“And yet you didn’t tell me, when you knew. Five years Hermione. Five years!”



“You hurt me Severus. Your words were engrained into my head and my heart! Do not blame me because it is your entire fault to begin with,” she said poking him in the chest, hard.



“You weren’t planning on telling me at all, were you?” he asked back, his voice softening somewhat.



“I was planning on telling you awhile ago in private, I swear,” Hermione answered. “But with the news about Bill… it just slipped.”



“And how long has Lucius known?”



“Last week, when he talked to me. I was afraid that Skeeter would find out about Tobi if she were to dig up more things about my life. I didn’t want her to print some stupid false article on him. Lucius promised me that he would take care of Skeeter if it came to that.” Hermione watched Severus turn away and walk towards the mantle, leaning on it with his arms out stretched. She sat back down on the couch, and sulked her head between her hands.



Everything was crashing down at her all at once. First she was mourning, and now she was arguing with Severus of all people. She needed to be held by him, and comforted by him. But for obvious reasons, it wasn’t happening.



There were so many questions that Severus wanted to ask, but one thing didn’t seem to make sense. “Then who in the world is Ethan?” he asked.



“Ethan and Tobias are one in the same,” Hermione replied. “Tobias Ethan Snape. I just used his middle name. I didn’t lie when I said that he meant the world to me because he does.”



Severus’s jaw tightened as he shook his head. He felt like he had just been stabbed inside, a feeling in which he hated. “If you didn’t have to come back here for a case or whatever other crap there is, you wouldn’t have told me about him would you?”



“I don’t know.”



“Bullocks! I can’t believe that this is happening again.”



“I really don’t know!” Hermione argued back, hurt by his words. Did he really think of her that way? The pain she had caused him did cause more of a burden. “I never denied him from you Severus. You are his father, and I never can change that. He knows exactly who you are, and even asks questions about you.”



Severus gulped, not expecting to hear that from Hermione.



“When he grew up and wanted to go to Hogwarts and wanted to meet you, I would let him. I wouldn’t stop him. I am proud that you are his father, and wouldn’t want anything more.



“I know I made a mistake,” she continued. She set her pride aside, not wanting to continue on fighting and cause more problems. “Now I know that I made a mistake hiding him from you. Maybe if things were different in the past… I wouldn’t have left for New York, I would’ve told you about him… Maybe if I opened the letter when you sent it to me… things would’ve turned out differently.



“I can’t change what’s in the past,” she said as she raised her head. She saw that his back was still facing her. She wanted to see his face, but knew all too well that he was too angry to even look at her. “I didn’t mean to hurt you Severus, but you could say that I acted out of my own personal selfish reasons. I didn’t want to get hurt by you again. Aren’t you going to say anything?”



Severus turned his head slightly still not facing her, but he was able to see her from the corner of his eye. He didn’t answer.



Hermione stood up from the couch slowly. She ignored the pain in her knee, and took hold of her cane as she pocketed her phone. “I can only imagine the pain that I have caused you, but I am not Alex.”



It shocked Severus to hear Alex’s name. So she did read the letter he concluded.



“I am not her,” Hermione continued. “But if you think that I betrayed you the same way that she had done… it’s different. I had no intent of robbing you of your rights to your son. Tobi is yours. I can only hope that this time around, you can forgive and understand me, as I have to you. If you don’t love me anymore, don’t want me, and hate me, then it’s a mistake I’ll have to learn to live with.” She stood there silent for the next few seconds, hoping that Severus would say something or respond in some way, but no, he kept silent and still. “I’m really sorry,” she croaked as she made her way towards the door.



When Hermione pulled on the door handle, opening the door by only an inch or two, the door then pushed shut. She slightly turned her head and saw Severus’s arm coming from behind her shoulder. Her eyes closed as she readied herself for another of his onslaughts.



Severus slowly wrapped both his arms around Hermione, pulling her against him. He could feel her body slightly shaking, knowing that she was sobbing. “I could never hate you,” he whispered into her ear.



Hermione turned in his arms, wrapping her arms around him as she cried harder into his chest. She needed to cry, and let all of her emotions out.



Severus held her tightly, feeling guilty. He could have reacted better, but his anger had gotten to him. When he felt her weight on him, he gently carried in his arms, and cradled her to his chest. He turned on his heels and walked towards the fireplace, flooing to his chambers.



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AN – Sorry it’s taking so long to update for me. Life is really getting in the way. Hoping that things will get better soon. Again, please do review.