On the first day of Christmas

Hermione looked to him mortified, surely he wasn\'t serious, he couldn\'t be after...after what they had shared?

Evidently he could. He had now turned from her and was retrieving his trousers from the side of the bed. Pulling them on along with a robe he stood, looking down at her.

\"I\'ll walk you to the door.\"

Hermione didn\'t dare meet his eyes, and instead pulled on her school robe over her clothes, and shakily made her way to the door, feeling a little sore.

She didn\'t turn to see if Snape cared that it pained her, she couldn\'t bring herself to do it. He was clearing his throat as they made their way to the door, but picking up the Invisibility cloak he handed it to her silently.

She took it, tears stinging her eyes. She waited for him to say it was all a cruel joke, that it was a cover...that he was performing damage control. But he wasn\'t. She didn\'t dare look into the eyes that before had held such passion, but now were probably stern and cold.

She hadn\'t meant to hurt him, if that was what she had indeed done.

He was indeed looking to her gently, more soft than moments prior when in the throes of fury. The mere gall of those three suggesting he had used a potion to bed her.

But he hadn\'t...she cared for him.

With that thought in his mind, he grasped her elbow, guiding her to the door. She pulled back angrily, \"Don\'t touch me.\" she said lowly, her eyes furious.

He stiffened and opened the door for her, looking to her flushed face. He didn\'t get much of a chance as she flipped the cloak on and hurried out the door.

He felt his stomach drop as he shut the door and he made his way back into his bedchambers. What the hell had he done?

He looked out his window, hoping for a glance at her before she left, but all he saw were the various children from houses playing in the newlylen len snow. Bloody cheery bastards.

He felt his fists clench along with his teeth, and he passed a mirror to get to the bed. His eyes were sorrowful, and he looked away. She hadn\'t gotten to him.

He had done the right thing. She was much too young to be involved with a git like him in the first place...wasn\'t she? Plus, wasn\'t as if she cared, was probably just a conquest to a know-it-all like herself. Plus, Albus would have him fired in an instant if he ever found out.

Which he wouldn\'t...Hermione would never have told...

He sat on the edge of his bed, looking to the cufflinks that lay there from her and...was that a card? That must have been why she had been in his chamber\'s last night. The guilt in him tripled. She had given him a gift...two actually when he thought about it.

He looked to the envelope, \'Severus\', written in her silvery script. Snape sighed morosely, recognizing the sweet perfume on it as her own. If he pressed the pillow to his face, he was sure he\'d still detect her flowery scent. He looked back to the envelope, the sorrow consuming him.

\"Little one...\" he mumbled sadly, tearing the envelope gently. He opened the black card, his dark eyes gliding over the words...

To Severus...

I know I may be young, and you don\'t care much
for the Christmas season. But here\'s a small
poem I\'ve copied for you, against all my better
reason. Love, Hermione.

The word love stuck out, and he felt his breath
quicken...she had actually written it out on paper
for the world to see. He quickly read on,

The red rose whispers of passion,
And the white rose breathes of love;
O, the red rose is a...

Wait a moment.

He had written this.

These were his own love declarations...for a certain bushy-haired Gryffindor. But he had put it in some book and given them away.. His heart pounded furiously...how had she found it? How could she possibly have known?

Hogsmeade.

He had brought those books into the book shop, trading them in for sickles..and Hermione..that book she had been hiding behind her back...she had bought them back that very day!

The realization all came crashing down on him...she didn\'t even know this was his writing. She loved his writing without even knowing it was him...she was unquestionably special...and he had blown it.

He put the card next to the cufflinks and felt his heart thump soundly in his aching chest. Wait.

Perhaps there was still time...
__________________________________________

He n fan fancied me...all this time, all this wasted affection...oh God...I lost my virginity to the man...oh God....I don\'t know how I\'m going to face him...oh....and I still have months left before I graduate oh...

The trials and tribulations going through poor Hermione Granger\'s head were eating her alive. What had she done? This was unquestionably the stupidest thing she had ever done in her entire life.

She saw the snow that fell on the schoolgrounds of Hogwarts, her eyes filling once more. She brushed them away furiously, angry at her weakness.

The walk back to her room under the shield of the cloak had been a bitterly cold one. She had continually looked back in hopes to see his face looking after her...but if he had she had missed it.

He had gotten what he wanted and now he was done with her. Through the halls she had taken the cloak off, only to be harassed by a nosy, graying woman in a portrait.

\"Why hello my dear.\" the woman said smiling, Hermione forced a small one onto her own pale face.

\"Good afternoon.\"

The portrait nodded politely, looking to Hermione with a scrupulous gaze. Hermione felt she was guilty of something...she just didn\'t know what.

\"It looks as if you\'ve been crying...\" the portrait sudden said, \"Has that horrible Professor Snape been cruel to you again?\"

Hermione looked to the portrait sorrowfully, blinking back tears she could only utter a strangled, \"More than you\'ll ever know.\" before rushing off to her chambers.

She had proceeded to stay in her Head Girl chambers all day, not daring to make an appearance at the hall for lunch or dinner...since she had missed breakfast.

Harry and Ron had tried to see her many times during the day, Viktor in a state of shock had left long ago. She refused to see them. Bloody buggers always ruddy well ruining things. She hated them at this moment more than she ever thought possible.

Snape. She had gone through six years of hating him, of avoiding him and now...in one stupid moment of weakness had given everything to him, just to have him throw it in her face.

Forget him.

That\'s precisely what she\'d do. Perhaps she\'d call up Viktor. God knows he\'d been more than willing.

She sighed, knowing that these thoughts were false and misleading and that she wanted nothing more than to crawl back into the once welcoming bed of the surly Potions Master that she had grown to...love actually.

It was now growing dark, the grounds icy terrain looking slippery in the dimming light. She couldn\'t help but wistfully wish for the time when she was young, a young girl with nothing to care about in the world...now it seemed she had to care about everything.

She didn\'t want to anymore.
______________________________________

The flowers in his hands were beginning to droop, he had been pacing in his chambers all day, rehearsing the perfect speech.

What if she doesn\'t let me even speak? What if she\'s gone to Albus already? What if...what if she doesn\'t ever want to see me again?

These thoughts nagged him as he paced, continua..
..

Serves me right...being so cruel..but she didn\'t understand why...and I never knew...how...how can I possibly get her to listen to me?

Some silvery parchment caught his eye suddenly, how could he have forgotten? A small smirk played upon his lips...

He quickly grabbed it, shoved it into his robes and with a final glance in the mirror he headed out of his chambers.

Thels sls seemed longer, more intimidating and Snape found it extremely difficult to hide the nervousness from his face. Luckily it was far past curfew and no one would dare question him.

He was almost near her Head Girl chambers when a snotty cough from his right caught his attention. Oh bugger...that damned portrait. The one that had warned him about his inner longing...

\"Snape?\" She said angrily, \"Don\'t you dare go near that girl? She has had more than enough for tonight! I don\'t know what you did but oh...you deserve Azkaban for it.\"

Snape looked to the portrait in anger his dark eyes narrowed, rebutting with a swift, \"What are you on about?\" and a small quill was produced from his cloaks. He held it dangerously close to the pompous picture.

The portrait\'s glassy eyes opened wide, her lips quivering. \"Err nothing...have a good night Severus.\" with that she left, running down to see the Fat Lady.

Although his revenge was done, he now had lingering doubts. Should he even bother with it? Was Hermione worth it?

With those worried thoughts in his brain, he turned and headed back down to his chambers.
_________________________________

Hermione lay on her bed then, her eyes starry as she thought of Christmas when she was a child. The good days as she so often referred to them as.

The sound of a door knocking woke her from dreaming, Hermione sighed, Stupid Ron anrry.rry... \"Bugger off!\"

There was a bit of shuffling, as Hermione waited for them to leave...they did, slowly and painstakingly. She lay back down on her bed, looking to the ceiling.

\"Since you refused to answer your door, I\'m afraid I had to let myself in.\"

Hermione sat up, her eyes wide with fright. Snape stood by her fireplace, looking smug. She fidgeted a bit, looking wildly around and then settling her eyes on his shoes.

\"You\'re not supposed to be in here.\"

\"But I am.\"

Stony silence ensued, and after a moments unrest Snape finally walked over to her on the bed, preparing to sit next to her. Snape...was here...in her bedchambers. Payback.

He was holding flowers that had seen the worst of times, and before sitting down he awkwardly handed them to her. \"Err...these are for you.\"

Hermione took them, glancing at them and then tossed them onto the ground. Flowers did not make up for humilon. on. Snape sighed exasperated.

\"Listen here Hermione, I came a long way t-\"

\"You came a long way?\" she said, looking to him fully furious now, \"You\'re cruel to me at every turn? You throw me from your chambers without so much as a reason? You ignore me all day...and yet, you\'re the one going through hardship?\"

He smelled so good, and she looked to his frame. He was so strong looking...so dashing in a way. Those dark eyes trained on her...Damn her...she was still lusting after him. What was wrong with her?

He looked at her, seeing her angry stance as she sat on the edge of the bed beside him, arms crossed and eyes lowered.

She expected him to mock her, to tell her in patronizing tones that last night was a mistake, that she was too young and he too experienced.

\"I\'m sorry.\" he instead said, the small words so loud in the quiet room. \"I was worried, about you and I, about losing my job about having you expelled and...well...I\'m sorry.\" Hermione could not meet his eyes, but he knew hordsords had struck a chord with her

\"Apology accepted.\" she answered stonily, \"You know where the exit is.\"

Snape nodded gently, he had known this was to happen and he was prepared. \"I\'m afraid I won\'t, Miss Granger. You see, you\'re bound to me.\"

What?

\"What are you talking about?\" she asked, the verge of a smile on her solemn face. He himself smirked a bit, and reaching into the pocket of his robes proceeded to withdraw a small silvery piece of parchment. Hermione recognized it immediately.

\"The scroll I signed,\" she stated plainly, \"I hardly see how this-\"

\"This,\" Snape interrupted, \"Is a binding contract. You are bound to me, for as long as I wish.\"

Hermione\'s heart pounded furiously in her chest as she squinted to him asking, \"Sorry?\"

\"You recall when I asked you to sign it? Evidently you didn\'t read the fine print.\" he was giving her a smug sneer now, one that Hermione against her better judgement still found attractive.

\"Yes, you asked me to sign it before we went to Hogsmeade.\"

\"Correct.\"

He stood then as did she, arms crossed as he waited...as if she was to have an epiphany. But the light did not go on in her eyes, and she did not leap onto him and smother him in kisses. Instead she gave a bewildered look in his direction.

\"I\'m afraid I don\'t understand.\"

Severus sighed, \"Don\'t you see you silly little girl? I asked you to sign a contract tying you to me far before you made obvious your affection for me.\"

Hermione\'s face still drew a blank. He sighed, for a know-it-all she sure was slow when it came to romance.

\"Isn\'t it obvious this wasn\'t some little fling? That I\'ve been pining after you for far too long? That seeing you with Krum nearly broke me and when I threw you out of my dungeons it tore me apart?\"

Hermione\'s breath grew shallow, was he saying...what she thought he was saying? No...he was Severus Snape...the man didn\'t love.

\"Isn\'t it obvious that I care far more deeply than I let on?\"

Hermione\'s smile was now evident, along with tears in her dark eyes, \"So what your saying is...?\"

Snape was flushed, evidently getting angry at the fact that he believed she wasn\'t catching on. \"I love you Miss Granger...Hermione. Do you follow? I love you..I just couldn\'t tell you.\"

Hermione didn\'t move, her arms still crossed in defiance as she stood looking at him. Snape with his breathing slowing, felt his neck get hot as his heart sank..he had blown it. \"I don\'t expect you t-\"

The words of resignation didn\'t have a chance to pass those lips of his because Hermione already had hers pressed to them.

She broke off a moment later, \"I love you too Severus, I just though-\"

She didn\'t have time to answer, he had already attacked moutmouth with needy kisses, his eyes shut tightly as he savored her. He staggered a bit, feeling her arms around him, hugging him to her tightly and he was feeling lightheaded.

She was back in his arms.

She and he fell onto the bed, still kissing madly. He broke apart only when she began to giggle.

\"I can\'t believe you brought me flowers.\"

He raised an eyebrow bemused, \"I read in some muggle magazine that they’re good when a relationship is becoming sned.ned.\"

\"So this means we\'re an \'item\' then?\"

Snape smirked, \"Behind closed doors.\"

Hermione nodded, absently playing with the cuffs of his sleeve...wait a moment. Something small and designed caught her attention, she looked to him.

\"You\'re wearing the cufflinks.\"

\"Indeed I am. I\'ll never take them off again.\"

Hermione smiled and snuggled a bit closer to his embrace, endlessly thankful that she was Head Girl. He kissed her forehead gently, cradling her in his arms.

She would have told him over and over how much she loved him, and how she so thankful to have him...but she knew he\'d only get embarassed. Confessing his affections for her must have damn near killed him.

She looked up to him, seeing for the first time just how sweet he truly was and how lucky she was in turn.

\"Merry Christmas Severus.\"

A gentle kiss and a smile later he answered.

\"Merry Christmas Hermione.\"
_________________________________

authors notes:

This was a hard chapter to write, I\'m not a big fan of Snape being all lovey and so forth, but it seemed appropriate for this particular fic. Sorry if it\'s completely out of character for him, but I have a feeling this is an acceptable ending. Just wanted to thank all of you for your support and brilliant comments. I adore reading them. cheers. holden.