Life and Its Mysteries

Chapter 13



Hermione stared out into the Black Lake, very much deep in thought. Earlier, she had apparated nearby, instead of flooing to Albus’s office from the airport. She knew that the floo would be open for her, but she needed to think of everything clearly—Severus and his letter.



The morning after she had read the letter, her decision had remained the same as it was the week before. Hermione still wanted Severus in her life. She still loved him, her heart never belonging to anyone else but him. She still wanted to marry him, and have a family with him.



She was shocked to say the least, feeling pain—before, during and after she had read the letter. At first it was hers, and then it became hers and Severus. Severus had held many dark and painful memories, and Alex was one of them though he knew nothing else of her. It was a pain that she thought she couldn’t erase from him. And because of that pain, he had caused her pain. Was it ever going to end?



Hermione was nothing like Alex. She never saw Severus as a monster, but as another human with feelings. Yes, he did have his dark side, but there was a side to Severus that Hermione had seen firsthand for she was the one that opened it. She never feared him, but always respected him. He was brave, powerful and strong. Part of her was mad at him, for he should have known better then to think that she would react to his secret in such a way. But another part of her understood him. He wanted to be safe and far, from a type of hurt and pain that he could not handle.



Her heart was still broken, and it had yet to heal. And the only one that could heal it was the man who broke it himself—Severus Snape. They both knew how they felt for each other, and most of all, the both of them were still in love. It was complicated. Then again, when were things simple in life?



Hermione’s thoughts then shifted to Tobi as she thought about him. Before she felt New York, she was thinking about taking him along, but then decided best not to. Biff was on the loose, and she couldn’t take the risk or putting Tobi in any danger whatsoever.



Talking to Severus first was what Hermione wanted to do. She wasn’t too sure how he would take the news about Tobi, hoping that he was going to take it well. Not only did Severus have to accept Hermione in his life, but Tobi as well—a son that he knew nothing of. It would probably be the shock of his life, but hopefully, a good one. For Tobi, he knew exactly who Severus was. Hermione could just imagine him blabbering all about potions, asking his Daddy to brew with him.



Hermione sighed and looked at her watch. She took hold of her duffel bag on the ground, slinging it on her shoulder, making her way towards the castle.



On the way to Albus’s office, Hermione noticed that the students that she passed in the corridors were giving her a sad and solemn look. Hermione wondered why, and the only reason she could think of was Skeeter. What did the stupid bitch come up with and print the newspaper when she was gone? Damn her, whatever it was. Least she knew that the students in Hogwarts had respected her privacy as well as Severus’s. They weren’t bothersome with questions, minding their own businesses. Maybe they were too frightened of Severus, knowing that if they did speak a single word about their relationship, he would hex them into next year.



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When Hermione walked into Albus’s office, she immediately noticed that there was a small group of people. Johnny, Joshua, Lucius, Remus, Severus, Minerva and of course Albus were the ones present. All of them had the same solemn faces that the student had when they all made eye contact with her. It made her gut turn this time, knowing that something was wrong.



Hermione slid her bag off her shoulder and stood there, with a hand on her hip. She was waiting for someone to start speaking, but no one did. After a long number of seconds, she broke the silence. “Something happened, I’m not stupid,” she said. “Someone better start speaking and tell me what I need to know.”



As everyone remained silent, Severus took a step forward, standing closer to her side. He was feet away, but couldn’t speak as well. He felt as if he didn’t have the right to be the bearer of such painful news.



“Is it Skeeter? What the hell did she print this time?” Hermione asked. She then looked at Lucius. “I thought you said you were going to take care of her if she was a problem?”



“It’s not her,” Lucius answered softly.



“Then wha-“



“It’s Bill!” Johnny finally said aloud.



“What?” Hermione asked as she turned to face him. She felt hurt gut turn all the more, making that wrong feeling grow.



“Biff got into the caste. Bill went after him first since he was the closest. And then when I got there… I cast the killing spell on him, right after… he cast his on Bill,” Joshua explained with hurt in his voice.



“What?” Hermione gulped, refusing to believe what she heard. It couldn’t be.



“Dean and Eric are at the Ministry. Filing paper work… He’s dead,” Johnny said.



Hermione shook her head, and felt the bile rise in her throat. She felt her knees weaken. Just before she was about to hit the ground, a pair of arms had caught her. “No!” Hermione said as she shoved Severus away from her.



Severus backed off, giving her the space that she needed.



She stood up straight, and walked towards Albus’s desk. She didn’t even fight the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes.



“Hermione-“



“No, no, no! This wasn’t supposed to happen. Not him. I shouldn’t have left.” Hermione was starting to ramble and just stared at the quill that lay on Albus’s desk. She could feel herself start to get hot as her heartbeat got faster and faster beneath her chest. One hand was gripping at her cane, the other at the edge of Albus’s desk, her knuckles turning white at the strength of her grip.



Bill couldn’t be dead. He was her best friend when she was at New York. Out of all her teammates, he was the one that she was closest to.



“I shouldn’t have left,” Hermione croaked.



“You cannot blame yourself Hermione,” Johnny said. “It’s not your fault.”



“It wouldn’t have happened if I was here,” she stated as she raised her head and looked at him and Joshua.



“And then what?” Joshua asked raising his voice slightly. “You die instead of him? I don’t think so.”



“I shouldn’t have left!”



“But you did! That is what we all agreed to. You think that Bill would rather have you die instead of him? Don’t you dare think of anything like that! It happened and there was nothing we could do about it. At least Biff is dead. Isn’t that we came for?” Joshua asked. “It comes with our job Hermione. We have had our mishaps in the past.”



Hermione sat down on Albus’s desk taking hold of the quill. As she tossed it in the air, it turned into a baseball before it fell back down into her hand. Joshua was right. Their line of work did have its hazards. Being an auror wasn’t really a safe job. After all, they were going after the most wanted criminal wizards and witches.



Now, all she could think about was Tobi. She knew that Severus was in the room, but she still spoke. “Now someone explain to me… How in the hell am I going to tell a four year old boy that his godfather died? How?!”



Joshua and Johnny didn’t know how to answer that and just looked down at the ground.



“How?! God dammint!” Hermione shouted as she stood up and threw the ball as hard as she could towards the standing mirror. As the glass shattered loudly, everyone slightly jumped back in surprise and fear.



“Hermione, I know it’s going to be hard,” Joshua started. “We-“



“Damn right!” she shouted. “How the hell is Tobias going to take it? My son doesn’t take things lightly, and you know that! This will surely hurt him!”



Severus’s heart stopped for a moment when he registered the words that had just come out of Hermione’s mouth. Son? Tobias? Four years old? Then that only meant… When he turned to look at Lucius, the man only gave him a single nod as if reading his thoughts. How long had he known?



The other three were also in shock, also understanding the revelation of Hermione’s son. However, they kept silent to themselves, knowing well it was best not to say anything.



Joshua walked towards Hermione and attempted to try and comfort her, but was only pushed away.



Hermione stood up and walked passed Joshua. She stopped for a moment and raised her hand up in the air, summoning the baseball in her hand. “The last thing that Tobi asked me before I left to come back here was… ‘When is Uncle Bill coming back for baseball?’ What am I going to tell him now?”



Again, no one in the room answered. It was a difficult question.



As Hermione walked towards the door, she stopped and looked at Severus. “I’m sorry…” she said softly to him before walking out the office.



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AN – The drama! Love it? Review!