Only through the pain
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Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
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Category:
Harry Potter › Slash - Male/Male › Harry/Draco
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
37
Views:
9,824
Reviews:
192
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the characters in the Harry Potter books or movies.. All rights belong to their respective owners. I make no money from using them for my own twisted purposes. I do not own the songs I use nor do I make money for using them.
Karaoke Party!!!!!
Disclaimer: don’t own ‘em, nope, don’t own anything ‘ceptin this lovely bottle of pain killers….people really shouldn’t give me mind altering substances….
Warning: heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe….**ahem**
A/N: short, sweet, and to the point, today’s chapter is called “karaoke party” because….yeah…..
Chapter 11- karaoke party (Draco)
The Chamber was bigger then the room we’d just been in, and much dimmer, lit only with large clusters of glowing multi-colored moving liquid lamps, around which were settled various members of all three cooperating houses in little, private circles, smoking, laughing, and in the case of the circle nearest us composed of Neville Longbottom, Dean Thomas, Seamus Finnegan and the girls from the Gryffindor Quidditch team, playing strip poker which the first three seemed to be losing. A group in the far end of the room was watching something on a giant screen and laughing hysterically, another group of perhaps four Ravenclaws (including Lovegood) were creating strange creatures out of their exhaled smoke, and a third group of perhaps ten Hufflepuffs (I always did suspect Hufflepuffs smoked…I mean come on, HufflePUFFs?) were loudly and actively arguing politics with lots of waving hand gestures. There were several huge piles of snacks and drinks floating around and a bar in one corner that three Gryffindor seventh years were having a shot contest at with the lone Slytherin member of the gathering (who was loosing spectacularly to Lee Jordan). The twins had already pushed close to the bar and were lighting up with borrowed lighters while Ginny beat Dean and Seamus about the heads with their own pants in the circle Harry was walking towards.
“Have a seat Malfoy, Angelina and I don’t bite…often.” Katie Bell laughed, waving me over.
“You’re being awful friendly Bell,” I said, slightly suspiciously as I settled onto a cushion between Ginny and Harry, the only two of the gathering I knew wouldn’t kill me at any moment.
“’Course she is Draco,” Angelina said, “Ginny says you’re her Grasshopper and if Harry and Ginny say you’re ok, then we’ll believe it.”
“Until you turn back into an evil git anyway,” Seamus coughed, and leaned forward to whisper conspiratorially, “We’ve got a pool going on how long that takes, if you hold out to Christmas I’ll split the pot with ya.”
“Seamus Finnegan you lying dog, you’ve never shared pot with anyone,” Ginny said, summoning a non-Hermione-charmed lighter and pulling out a big bag and passing joints out to anyone who put out a hand. She was obviously the dealer/ringleader of this group, or at least this particular circle. “In fact, you never have your own pot ever.” She said, handing him several tiny sticks.
“Not POT Ginny, THE pot. As in the bet we all have going on how long this brainwashed Malfoy will last. My money’s on his taking the mark anyway over Christmas hols and not before.” Seamus said, sticking three of the four joints in his shirt pocket and lighting the fourth.
Ginny winked at me and then said, “Oh really? And how much are we talking about Fin?”
“Well over three hundred so far, minimum donation’s ten Galleons.” Dean said in answer, pulling out a bookie’s notepad. “Care to get in on this action Gin, darling?”
“Maybe, how many takers do you have for midnight on Halloween?” Ginny asked and I tried to discreetly jab her side with my nail.
“Oh come on Ginny, don’t you have any faith in your grasshopper?” Harry laughed.
“Oh, mountains of faith Harry, but if I happen to be wrong then at least I get a nice chunk of pocket change eh? Put me down for midnight on Halloween Dean,” Ginny said, pulling out a familiar black velvet money pouch and extracting ten galleons.
“Hey! That’s my wallet!” I exclaimed, choking on my smoke and checking my back pocket. “When the hell did you snatch that?!”
“When I pushed you down the pipe.” She shrugged, handing over the money and then handing me the pouch back, much lighter then it was before I’d lost it. “If I win I’ll owe you ten galleons, and if I lose then…”
“You’ll still owe me ten galleons.” I grumbled, putting the wallet in a tighter pocket.
“And if I lose then just consider it payment for services rendered Grasshopper.” She said pointedly looking over at the confused Harry.
I frowned and took another hit then sighed, “Are you ever gonna explain this whole grasshopper thing? Some of us don’t understand clearly muggle references….” The circle looked at each other, shrugging and I sighed again, “fine, I don’t understand then.”
“Uh….it’s a movie?” Neville said quietly, shrinking lower into himself. “An uhm….moving picture that tells a story….” He said when I didn’t belittle him, “and this movie is about a kid learning martial arts and his teacher calls him grasshopper because he’s young and jumpy….”
I glared at Ginny, “I am NOT jumpy.” Unfortunately, just then, one of the twins came up behind me and poked my back, making me jump a foot in the air and making the circle laugh.
“Who’s up for a little sincere karaoke?” he asked as he settled next to one of the girls who were now giggling. His opposite sat next to him and there were nods and shrugs of agreement around the circle. “Cool, all the others are up for it too, so it should be roaring good fun for everyone except the singer.”
“What’s karaoke and why does it involve singing?” I asked, getting raised eyebrows, “I know I just told you all I am not knowledgeable to muggle terms.”
“Karaoke is getting up on stage and TRYING to sing along with a song and SINCERE karaoke is when the person’s song has to reflect a truth about the person or a person, depending on what the last person to go up demands. The last person to go picks the next person and whether the truth is about them, someone else specific, the general group, a teacher, or whatever. The first person’s subject is picked by the group.” Harry explained.
“Well, that sounds alright…but how do you get people to sing sincere songs? Seems to me like they would make stuff up.” I pointed out. It was one thing I never understood about muggle truth or dare. How did you know a person was telling the truth unless they took veritaserum?
“Ah, see, now that’s the fun part. Hermione, bless her prudish soul, came up with a spell that turns the person bright purple for twenty-four hours unless they sing from the heart.” Fred said, I was sure it was Fred because I caught a glimpse of not blue eyebrow.
“Yes, for a stuck up little bookworm she is quite a genius with the humiliation spells.” George agreed, “She gave us some of our best ideas with the curses she’s shot at you Slytherins.”
“Uhm….alright….can’t be too bad yeah?” I said, turning to Ginny for confirmation but she was grinning at me strangely.
“I’ll go first!” a hufflepuff volunteered, jumping up, and running to the huge screen where everyone was now gathering, casting a spell on herself and picking up a microphone, “Ok, what do you want me to sing about people?!” she asked rockstar-esque into the mic.
“Freebird!” someone in front snickered.
“Shut up Lav, that’s not a subject,” someone else giggled. “Whats your favorite hobby!”
“Oh, that’s easy….” The girl rolled her eyes and pointed at the screen with her wand,
“Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle,
I want to ride my,
Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle,
I want to ride my bicycle,
I want to ride my bike,
I want to ride my bicycle,
I want to ride it where I like,
You say black, I say white,
You say bark I say bite,
You say shark I say hey man
Jaws were never my scene and I don’t like star wars.
You say rolls I say Royce
You say god
Give me a choice
You say no I say Christ
I don’t believe in peter pan,
Frankenstein or super man,
all I want is bicycle,
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike,
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to,
Bicycle races are coming this way,
So forget all your duties all year,
Fat bottomed girls will be riding today
So look out for the beauties all year,
Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle.
You say coke I say cane
You say john I say Wayne,
Hot dog I say cool it man
I don’t want to be the president of America,
You say smile I say cheese,
Cardier I say please,
Income tax I say Jesus
I don’t want to be a candidate
For Vietnam or Watergate
Cuz all I want to do is….
I want to ride my bicycle,
I want to ride my bike,
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride it where I like.”
She took a bow and then pointed at someone else who was forced to sing (in a rather off key voice) something sappy about his girlfriend amongst mild cat calls, then another was asked how he felt about his girlfriend’s ass and sang something called ‘Honky tonk badonkadonk’ that made absolutely no sense, then following in the spirit of feelings about ass and boobs a girl sang something annoying called ‘my humps.’ She called on Neville and asked him to sing about Lovegood, who was apparently his new girlfriend.
“Sometimes I wanna take you down,
Sometimes I want to get you low,
Brush your hair back from your eyes,
Take you down,
Let the river flow,
Sometimes I’m gonna walk the street,
Behind a green sheet of glass,
A million miles below their feet,
A million miles a million miles,
Being with you girl
Is like being low,
Hey, hey, hey I like being stoned,
I like being with you girl I like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned.
A million poppies gonna make me sleep,
Just one rose that knows your name,
The fruit is rusting on the vine,
The fruit is calling from the trees,
Hey don’t you wanna go down,
Like some junky Cosmo naught,
A million miles below their feet,
A million miles and million miles,
Being with you girl like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned,
I like being with you girl like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned.
Blue blue goes the sun,
Brown brown goes the sky
And green green are your eyes,
A million miles a million miles,
Hey don’t you wanna go down
Like some displaced Cosmo naught
A million miles below their feet
A million miles a million miles,
Being with you girl like being low,
Hey, hey, hey
Like being stoned,
I like being with you girl
Like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned.”
He blushed as he finished and she smiled…I think…it was hard to tell, she had an awfully large cloud in front of her face, and then Seamus was called and told to sum up his summer partying.
“I woke up flat faced,
On a kitchen floor
With an empty bottle of argenty
Still pressed in my hand,
My headache was intense
There was a sudden chill in the air,
But the biggest shock that was yet to come,
I was missing my underwear.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
I looked up and down
And all around,
People stopped to stare,
I asked everyone about it,
But no one really seemed to care,
It’s just not fair
What a nightmare
Wish I had a spare,
But I don’t.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
What could they have done with it?
I hear them all their laughing,
Hiding myself in the dark,
I hope nobody saw the skid mark.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
I was about to give up,
I was about to go home
When I saw my pair of BVTs
Lying there by the phone,
I knew that they were mine
I saw that they were fine,
But I was still drunk and naked,
And everybody laughed
And everybody screamed.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone seen my underwear?
Where did it go?”
He smirked and pointed at Fred and George, “I think the infamous twins should do a duet about Dumbledore, how about you guys?” there was a loud cheer and the twins stood, bowed and made their way to the front.
“Simple, simple,” Fred said.
“Yeah, someone come up with a challenge!” George added, casting the charm on himself and his twin, “I mean come on, we all already know that Seamus can’t keep on his undergarments to save his life.”
“Makes life more interesting!” Seamus called out and the twins ignored him.
“Ready George?”
“You first Fred.”
“Right then. To Dumbledore, you crazy bastard, you.
“Here come old flat top,
He come grooving up slowly,
He got juju eyeball,
He one holy roller,
He got hair down to his knees,
Got to be a joker he just do what he please.”
He wear no shoe shine,
He got toe jam football,
He got monkey finger,
He shoot Coca-Cola,
He say I know you
And you know me,
One thing I can tell you is you got to be free.”
Come together,
Right now,
Over me.
His bad production
He got walrus gunboat
He got oh no sidebar
He got spine no cracker
He got feet down to his knees,
Hold you in his arms so you can fell his disease,”
Come together,
Right now,
Over me.”
He roller coaster
He got early warning
He got muddy water
He want mojo filter,
He say one
And one
And one is three,
Got to be good looking
Cuz he’s so hard to see.
Come together,
Right now,
Over me.
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah.”
Loud applause and cheering met the end of their song, and then the thing I feared happened. They picked Ginny. “Self-esteem.” They ordered together.
“Mine, or someone else’s?” Ginny asked, grinning.
“Draco’s!” Seamus laughed, getting a light glare from me, but hoots and catcalls from everyone else. I had a feeling, as the newest member of the group, that a lot of songs would be centered around me now.
“Yeah! Tell us what you think about Draco’s self-esteem!” the twins shouted together.
“Alright!” Ginny said, taking one last toke and then pointing her wand. Words began to arrange themselves on the screen behind her as she pointed at me sitting in the back. “I’d like to dedicate this song to my new Grasshopper, may you learn well from it.” She closed her eyes, smiled, took a deep breath and then,“I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love; love’s going to leave me.” She said in a deep voice and the cat calls increased as a bouncy beat began and she started dancing. I twitched….repeatedly.
“I’m, too sexy for my shirt,
Too sexy for my shirt,
So sexy it hurts,
I’m too sexy for Milan,
Too sexy for Milan,
New York and Japan.”
I’m too sexy for your party,
Too sexy for your party,
No way I’m disco dancing
I’m a model,
You know what I mean,
And I do my little turn on the cat walk.
Yeah on the cat walk,
Yeah on the cat walk yeah,
I do my littler turn on the cat walk
I’m too sexy for my car,
Too sexy for my car,
Too sexy by far.
I’m too sexy for my hat,
Too sexy for my hat,
Whatcha think of that?
I’m a model,
You know what I mean,
And I do my little turn on the catwalk,
Yeah on the cat walk,
On the cat walk yeah,
I shake my little tush on the catwalk.
I’m too sexy for my cat,
Too sexy for my cat,
Poor pussy, poor pussy cat.
And I’m too sexy for my love,
Love’s going to leave me.”
She finished her little song and dance routine and then bowed in every direction. “Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all year. And Draco, stop scowling, you know it’s true.”
“You’re right.” I called angrily, “I AM too sexy for this party.” I stood up to leave but was restrained by the people on either side of me.
“Oh, you can’t leave Draco, it’s your turn! Don’t be a spoil sport.” Ginny sing songed into the mic. “Come on, get up here.”
“Go on Draco,” Harry said, grinning and pulling me to the stage, “It’s fun, really, and if you really, really, really don’t want to sing truthfully, you can always look like Barney for a day.”
“Who’s Barney?” I asked as the microphone was shoved into my hand.
“A muggle program designed to torture small children.” Ginny explained, “Harry, you can go back to your seat now.” She instructed and Harry shrugged and left. “Now Draco, I’m feeling nice, and since it’s you’re first time playing this, only you and I are going to know what you’re subject is alright?” the crowd booed and she glared at them, “I did the same thing for all of you, so shut it!” she ordered then silenced the microphone and whispered in my ear, “I want you to sing about your feelings for Harry. You can choose any song you want, but I’ll know and if you try to do something silly or try to weasel out through a loop hole, there will be consequences, understand?”
“Uh….Ginny….you’re not going to tell Harry are you?” I whispered back, slightly relieved yet completely mortified. At least I wasn’t being asked to sing a love song to my teddy bear…not that I have a teddy bear.
“That depends on whether or not he can figure it out from your song, so you better make it something good!” She hissed then fixed the microphone and stepped back. “Have fun!”
“I hate you Ginny.” I said loudly, “Really, truly, hate you.”
“Oi, who put their money on today? I think Draco’s gonna kill Ginny! That counts as turning evil again right?” Dean called and several people waved their hands. Apparently, only about half the room really believed me….oh well.
“Shut up and let him sing, I’ve heard him before and he’s got a good voice!” Harry shouted, smiling at me in a stoned, silly kind of way. I smiled back hesitantly and then sighed and let Ginny cast the purple spell on me.
“Just think of the song you want and point at the screen,” she said, “I expect great things from you grasshopper.”
I just glared at her and thought for a second. It had to be a song Harry would know and understand, something that he would know was for him…and something that conveyed how I felt….difficult….wait. “Perfect,” I said to myself and pointed at the screen.
Warning: heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe….**ahem**
A/N: short, sweet, and to the point, today’s chapter is called “karaoke party” because….yeah…..
Chapter 11- karaoke party (Draco)
The Chamber was bigger then the room we’d just been in, and much dimmer, lit only with large clusters of glowing multi-colored moving liquid lamps, around which were settled various members of all three cooperating houses in little, private circles, smoking, laughing, and in the case of the circle nearest us composed of Neville Longbottom, Dean Thomas, Seamus Finnegan and the girls from the Gryffindor Quidditch team, playing strip poker which the first three seemed to be losing. A group in the far end of the room was watching something on a giant screen and laughing hysterically, another group of perhaps four Ravenclaws (including Lovegood) were creating strange creatures out of their exhaled smoke, and a third group of perhaps ten Hufflepuffs (I always did suspect Hufflepuffs smoked…I mean come on, HufflePUFFs?) were loudly and actively arguing politics with lots of waving hand gestures. There were several huge piles of snacks and drinks floating around and a bar in one corner that three Gryffindor seventh years were having a shot contest at with the lone Slytherin member of the gathering (who was loosing spectacularly to Lee Jordan). The twins had already pushed close to the bar and were lighting up with borrowed lighters while Ginny beat Dean and Seamus about the heads with their own pants in the circle Harry was walking towards.
“Have a seat Malfoy, Angelina and I don’t bite…often.” Katie Bell laughed, waving me over.
“You’re being awful friendly Bell,” I said, slightly suspiciously as I settled onto a cushion between Ginny and Harry, the only two of the gathering I knew wouldn’t kill me at any moment.
“’Course she is Draco,” Angelina said, “Ginny says you’re her Grasshopper and if Harry and Ginny say you’re ok, then we’ll believe it.”
“Until you turn back into an evil git anyway,” Seamus coughed, and leaned forward to whisper conspiratorially, “We’ve got a pool going on how long that takes, if you hold out to Christmas I’ll split the pot with ya.”
“Seamus Finnegan you lying dog, you’ve never shared pot with anyone,” Ginny said, summoning a non-Hermione-charmed lighter and pulling out a big bag and passing joints out to anyone who put out a hand. She was obviously the dealer/ringleader of this group, or at least this particular circle. “In fact, you never have your own pot ever.” She said, handing him several tiny sticks.
“Not POT Ginny, THE pot. As in the bet we all have going on how long this brainwashed Malfoy will last. My money’s on his taking the mark anyway over Christmas hols and not before.” Seamus said, sticking three of the four joints in his shirt pocket and lighting the fourth.
Ginny winked at me and then said, “Oh really? And how much are we talking about Fin?”
“Well over three hundred so far, minimum donation’s ten Galleons.” Dean said in answer, pulling out a bookie’s notepad. “Care to get in on this action Gin, darling?”
“Maybe, how many takers do you have for midnight on Halloween?” Ginny asked and I tried to discreetly jab her side with my nail.
“Oh come on Ginny, don’t you have any faith in your grasshopper?” Harry laughed.
“Oh, mountains of faith Harry, but if I happen to be wrong then at least I get a nice chunk of pocket change eh? Put me down for midnight on Halloween Dean,” Ginny said, pulling out a familiar black velvet money pouch and extracting ten galleons.
“Hey! That’s my wallet!” I exclaimed, choking on my smoke and checking my back pocket. “When the hell did you snatch that?!”
“When I pushed you down the pipe.” She shrugged, handing over the money and then handing me the pouch back, much lighter then it was before I’d lost it. “If I win I’ll owe you ten galleons, and if I lose then…”
“You’ll still owe me ten galleons.” I grumbled, putting the wallet in a tighter pocket.
“And if I lose then just consider it payment for services rendered Grasshopper.” She said pointedly looking over at the confused Harry.
I frowned and took another hit then sighed, “Are you ever gonna explain this whole grasshopper thing? Some of us don’t understand clearly muggle references….” The circle looked at each other, shrugging and I sighed again, “fine, I don’t understand then.”
“Uh….it’s a movie?” Neville said quietly, shrinking lower into himself. “An uhm….moving picture that tells a story….” He said when I didn’t belittle him, “and this movie is about a kid learning martial arts and his teacher calls him grasshopper because he’s young and jumpy….”
I glared at Ginny, “I am NOT jumpy.” Unfortunately, just then, one of the twins came up behind me and poked my back, making me jump a foot in the air and making the circle laugh.
“Who’s up for a little sincere karaoke?” he asked as he settled next to one of the girls who were now giggling. His opposite sat next to him and there were nods and shrugs of agreement around the circle. “Cool, all the others are up for it too, so it should be roaring good fun for everyone except the singer.”
“What’s karaoke and why does it involve singing?” I asked, getting raised eyebrows, “I know I just told you all I am not knowledgeable to muggle terms.”
“Karaoke is getting up on stage and TRYING to sing along with a song and SINCERE karaoke is when the person’s song has to reflect a truth about the person or a person, depending on what the last person to go up demands. The last person to go picks the next person and whether the truth is about them, someone else specific, the general group, a teacher, or whatever. The first person’s subject is picked by the group.” Harry explained.
“Well, that sounds alright…but how do you get people to sing sincere songs? Seems to me like they would make stuff up.” I pointed out. It was one thing I never understood about muggle truth or dare. How did you know a person was telling the truth unless they took veritaserum?
“Ah, see, now that’s the fun part. Hermione, bless her prudish soul, came up with a spell that turns the person bright purple for twenty-four hours unless they sing from the heart.” Fred said, I was sure it was Fred because I caught a glimpse of not blue eyebrow.
“Yes, for a stuck up little bookworm she is quite a genius with the humiliation spells.” George agreed, “She gave us some of our best ideas with the curses she’s shot at you Slytherins.”
“Uhm….alright….can’t be too bad yeah?” I said, turning to Ginny for confirmation but she was grinning at me strangely.
“I’ll go first!” a hufflepuff volunteered, jumping up, and running to the huge screen where everyone was now gathering, casting a spell on herself and picking up a microphone, “Ok, what do you want me to sing about people?!” she asked rockstar-esque into the mic.
“Freebird!” someone in front snickered.
“Shut up Lav, that’s not a subject,” someone else giggled. “Whats your favorite hobby!”
“Oh, that’s easy….” The girl rolled her eyes and pointed at the screen with her wand,
“Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle,
I want to ride my,
Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle,
I want to ride my bicycle,
I want to ride my bike,
I want to ride my bicycle,
I want to ride it where I like,
You say black, I say white,
You say bark I say bite,
You say shark I say hey man
Jaws were never my scene and I don’t like star wars.
You say rolls I say Royce
You say god
Give me a choice
You say no I say Christ
I don’t believe in peter pan,
Frankenstein or super man,
all I want is bicycle,
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike,
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to,
Bicycle races are coming this way,
So forget all your duties all year,
Fat bottomed girls will be riding today
So look out for the beauties all year,
Bicycle, bicycle, bicycle.
You say coke I say cane
You say john I say Wayne,
Hot dog I say cool it man
I don’t want to be the president of America,
You say smile I say cheese,
Cardier I say please,
Income tax I say Jesus
I don’t want to be a candidate
For Vietnam or Watergate
Cuz all I want to do is….
I want to ride my bicycle,
I want to ride my bike,
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride it where I like.”
She took a bow and then pointed at someone else who was forced to sing (in a rather off key voice) something sappy about his girlfriend amongst mild cat calls, then another was asked how he felt about his girlfriend’s ass and sang something called ‘Honky tonk badonkadonk’ that made absolutely no sense, then following in the spirit of feelings about ass and boobs a girl sang something annoying called ‘my humps.’ She called on Neville and asked him to sing about Lovegood, who was apparently his new girlfriend.
“Sometimes I wanna take you down,
Sometimes I want to get you low,
Brush your hair back from your eyes,
Take you down,
Let the river flow,
Sometimes I’m gonna walk the street,
Behind a green sheet of glass,
A million miles below their feet,
A million miles a million miles,
Being with you girl
Is like being low,
Hey, hey, hey I like being stoned,
I like being with you girl I like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned.
A million poppies gonna make me sleep,
Just one rose that knows your name,
The fruit is rusting on the vine,
The fruit is calling from the trees,
Hey don’t you wanna go down,
Like some junky Cosmo naught,
A million miles below their feet,
A million miles and million miles,
Being with you girl like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned,
I like being with you girl like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned.
Blue blue goes the sun,
Brown brown goes the sky
And green green are your eyes,
A million miles a million miles,
Hey don’t you wanna go down
Like some displaced Cosmo naught
A million miles below their feet
A million miles a million miles,
Being with you girl like being low,
Hey, hey, hey
Like being stoned,
I like being with you girl
Like being low,
Hey, hey, hey like being stoned.”
He blushed as he finished and she smiled…I think…it was hard to tell, she had an awfully large cloud in front of her face, and then Seamus was called and told to sum up his summer partying.
“I woke up flat faced,
On a kitchen floor
With an empty bottle of argenty
Still pressed in my hand,
My headache was intense
There was a sudden chill in the air,
But the biggest shock that was yet to come,
I was missing my underwear.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
I looked up and down
And all around,
People stopped to stare,
I asked everyone about it,
But no one really seemed to care,
It’s just not fair
What a nightmare
Wish I had a spare,
But I don’t.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
What could they have done with it?
I hear them all their laughing,
Hiding myself in the dark,
I hope nobody saw the skid mark.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
I was about to give up,
I was about to go home
When I saw my pair of BVTs
Lying there by the phone,
I knew that they were mine
I saw that they were fine,
But I was still drunk and naked,
And everybody laughed
And everybody screamed.
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone
Has anyone
Seen my underwear?
Has anyone seen my underwear?
Where did it go?”
He smirked and pointed at Fred and George, “I think the infamous twins should do a duet about Dumbledore, how about you guys?” there was a loud cheer and the twins stood, bowed and made their way to the front.
“Simple, simple,” Fred said.
“Yeah, someone come up with a challenge!” George added, casting the charm on himself and his twin, “I mean come on, we all already know that Seamus can’t keep on his undergarments to save his life.”
“Makes life more interesting!” Seamus called out and the twins ignored him.
“Ready George?”
“You first Fred.”
“Right then. To Dumbledore, you crazy bastard, you.
“Here come old flat top,
He come grooving up slowly,
He got juju eyeball,
He one holy roller,
He got hair down to his knees,
Got to be a joker he just do what he please.”
He wear no shoe shine,
He got toe jam football,
He got monkey finger,
He shoot Coca-Cola,
He say I know you
And you know me,
One thing I can tell you is you got to be free.”
Come together,
Right now,
Over me.
His bad production
He got walrus gunboat
He got oh no sidebar
He got spine no cracker
He got feet down to his knees,
Hold you in his arms so you can fell his disease,”
Come together,
Right now,
Over me.”
He roller coaster
He got early warning
He got muddy water
He want mojo filter,
He say one
And one
And one is three,
Got to be good looking
Cuz he’s so hard to see.
Come together,
Right now,
Over me.
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah,
Come together, yeah.”
Loud applause and cheering met the end of their song, and then the thing I feared happened. They picked Ginny. “Self-esteem.” They ordered together.
“Mine, or someone else’s?” Ginny asked, grinning.
“Draco’s!” Seamus laughed, getting a light glare from me, but hoots and catcalls from everyone else. I had a feeling, as the newest member of the group, that a lot of songs would be centered around me now.
“Yeah! Tell us what you think about Draco’s self-esteem!” the twins shouted together.
“Alright!” Ginny said, taking one last toke and then pointing her wand. Words began to arrange themselves on the screen behind her as she pointed at me sitting in the back. “I’d like to dedicate this song to my new Grasshopper, may you learn well from it.” She closed her eyes, smiled, took a deep breath and then,“I’m too sexy for my love, too sexy for my love; love’s going to leave me.” She said in a deep voice and the cat calls increased as a bouncy beat began and she started dancing. I twitched….repeatedly.
“I’m, too sexy for my shirt,
Too sexy for my shirt,
So sexy it hurts,
I’m too sexy for Milan,
Too sexy for Milan,
New York and Japan.”
I’m too sexy for your party,
Too sexy for your party,
No way I’m disco dancing
I’m a model,
You know what I mean,
And I do my little turn on the cat walk.
Yeah on the cat walk,
Yeah on the cat walk yeah,
I do my littler turn on the cat walk
I’m too sexy for my car,
Too sexy for my car,
Too sexy by far.
I’m too sexy for my hat,
Too sexy for my hat,
Whatcha think of that?
I’m a model,
You know what I mean,
And I do my little turn on the catwalk,
Yeah on the cat walk,
On the cat walk yeah,
I shake my little tush on the catwalk.
I’m too sexy for my cat,
Too sexy for my cat,
Poor pussy, poor pussy cat.
And I’m too sexy for my love,
Love’s going to leave me.”
She finished her little song and dance routine and then bowed in every direction. “Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all year. And Draco, stop scowling, you know it’s true.”
“You’re right.” I called angrily, “I AM too sexy for this party.” I stood up to leave but was restrained by the people on either side of me.
“Oh, you can’t leave Draco, it’s your turn! Don’t be a spoil sport.” Ginny sing songed into the mic. “Come on, get up here.”
“Go on Draco,” Harry said, grinning and pulling me to the stage, “It’s fun, really, and if you really, really, really don’t want to sing truthfully, you can always look like Barney for a day.”
“Who’s Barney?” I asked as the microphone was shoved into my hand.
“A muggle program designed to torture small children.” Ginny explained, “Harry, you can go back to your seat now.” She instructed and Harry shrugged and left. “Now Draco, I’m feeling nice, and since it’s you’re first time playing this, only you and I are going to know what you’re subject is alright?” the crowd booed and she glared at them, “I did the same thing for all of you, so shut it!” she ordered then silenced the microphone and whispered in my ear, “I want you to sing about your feelings for Harry. You can choose any song you want, but I’ll know and if you try to do something silly or try to weasel out through a loop hole, there will be consequences, understand?”
“Uh….Ginny….you’re not going to tell Harry are you?” I whispered back, slightly relieved yet completely mortified. At least I wasn’t being asked to sing a love song to my teddy bear…not that I have a teddy bear.
“That depends on whether or not he can figure it out from your song, so you better make it something good!” She hissed then fixed the microphone and stepped back. “Have fun!”
“I hate you Ginny.” I said loudly, “Really, truly, hate you.”
“Oi, who put their money on today? I think Draco’s gonna kill Ginny! That counts as turning evil again right?” Dean called and several people waved their hands. Apparently, only about half the room really believed me….oh well.
“Shut up and let him sing, I’ve heard him before and he’s got a good voice!” Harry shouted, smiling at me in a stoned, silly kind of way. I smiled back hesitantly and then sighed and let Ginny cast the purple spell on me.
“Just think of the song you want and point at the screen,” she said, “I expect great things from you grasshopper.”
I just glared at her and thought for a second. It had to be a song Harry would know and understand, something that he would know was for him…and something that conveyed how I felt….difficult….wait. “Perfect,” I said to myself and pointed at the screen.