Bittersweet

Chapter Thirteen

*Authors Note*: This chapter took me a long time to finish. I have been extremely busy with school and have not had as much time as I've liked to write. There are a couple things that I want to make clear however about this chapter.

A couple months ago, when I was updating Chapter two, some people were talking to me about Hermione's mom, Patty and the relationship with John Potter. I want to make clear that this is in the PAST not NOW. PAST.

This has already happened. I am only giving you guys some back history. I am splitting it into several parts so it flows along with the story. I just want to make that clear. I hope this clears up any confusion anyone might be having. Thanks, and enjoy!

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As Hermione looked at herself in the mirror she noticed a hint of sadness. Her hair pinned up in beads, and curled tendrils hanging down passed her cheek, she sighed and brushed away a tear as it feel down her cheek. She didn’t expect to have such high emotions at the moment, but when those moments hit you, there was no turning back. She didn’t have the option but to hold back, dressed for the event of the year and an important spectacle of that event; she would just have to put those emotions on hold, if only for a few hours.

A few hours-she kept reminding herself. That’s all there was. She would show her face, make an appearance and quickly leave the premises. It was hard enough to walk in with Draco, but to then see him dance and be happy with Pansy was more than she was willing to take. She would keep her distance, let the sours heal then leap in for the plunge. She had to space herself when it came to Draco and her feelings for him. With recent developments, and the undeniable future he had with another woman, there was only one way to heal those wounds-time and space.

As she smoothed her rose colored dress, she gave herself one last glance and headed out of her room. As she arrived at the entrance to the Great Hall she saw him waiting for her. He looked spectacularly handsome in his newest dress robes and gave off an aura of greatness. As he noticed her, he spun excitedly to great her. However, as students started to gather, he turned abruptly back to his original position. Harry however, looked on suspiciously.

If he even thought about trying anything, Harry thought to himself. Whatever was going on between the two of them, he was going to find out. He wasn’t going to let Draco use his friends, especially Hermione. As Ginny grabbed at his shoulder, guiding him into the Great Hall, he was shoved back into his own reality and the woman at his side. Grinning, he looked from Draco to her.

As Hermione slid her way next to Draco, they glided fingertips at their waists. Being near him felt well, it felt safe. She wanted so badly to touch him more and to be near him. She knew that was a future she wouldn’t be able to enjoy. He stroked her hand.

“Please don’t.” she whispered, tears starting to build.

“Why not?” He asked with a concerned tone. “I can’t stop thinking about you and how we left things. Hermione…”

She didn’t answer him, as the processional of couples were directed into the Great Hall she calmly summoned up a smile and shed any possible tears that might peek their way through. He looked down at her and could feel a knife stabbing at his heart. He didn’t want her to be this way, to put up barriers between them. They needed to talk about things instead of her deciding what was best for their relationship. He never thought he’d be in the situation he was in now. Over the past few months, things had begun a whirlwind of emotions and consequences and it had been the best time of his life. He didn’t want to end that just because of Pansy or Voldemort, hell, even his father. He was in control of his destiny and the decisions being made.

As they paraded down the aisle to the main table, they were greeted by Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall. As they greeted the two of them, all houses and couples sat along their designated tables. To promote equality, community, and teamwork, all couples were accompanied by couples from other houses. As Hermione looked behind her, she could see that not only was Ron sitting with the newest flavor of the week but that Harry was looking happy as ever with Ginny. She was happy to know that even though she wasn’t having a good time that her friends were.

Harry’s table had two Hufflepuff’s which Hermione didn’t know along with Goyle and his date. While Ron’s table sat with two Ravenclaw’s along with two Hufflepuff’s. Hermione suspected their table would be accompanied with one of the prefects. As the music started, Dumbledore and McGonagall pointed them in the direction of their table. Hermione was right. They were with the prefects. As they sat next to the other couples, Draco slowly pulled her chair out for her, then realized looks were upon him, quickly placed himself in the chair-the Slytherins snickered, while the Gryffindors sneered.

Hermione only sighed; it was just another part of the system that she despised. She knew he was only doing it to conceal their secrets, and that it was the only option he had. She didn’t have to like it, but when it came to the two of them, it was a necessity. When she sat down, however, he gave her leg a little rub and the feelings of secrets and rules slid away. He seemed to always know just what she wanted, when she needed it.

Draco watched the people dancing and concluded that it was time for the two of them to make their scheduled stroll on the floor. He grabbed her hand, squeezed it and directed her to the floor. He ignored the eyes upon them and brought her into a slow waltz. He didn’t care about the eyes that followed them, he didn’t care that they were all wondering if she was indeed the “mystery girl”, and he didn’t care about what the consequences might be, he only cared for her and how damn beautiful she looked.

It amazed him how gorgeous she was and that with every guy looking at him with envious stares that she could have anyone here, and yet she had choose him. The epitome of evil and good glimmered throughout the dance floor and every face stayed glued on their swings of illusions. As they looked into each others eyes, he knew it was obvious, he knew that because of how they acted towards each other that it was more than just a thought, that it was truth.

As the song came to a closing, there was silence around them. Hermione knew this, but ignored it. She could only concentrate on him and what he did for her. Dancing with her, keeping her mind and thoughts on him, instead on reality was what she needed him for and what he was giving her. It was just them, no one else. She couldn’t dare to think of anyone but him. As the song ended, their fingers glided with each other.

Draco couldn’t stop himself if he wanted. He moved his face close to hers-smelling the sweet aroma of her-he bent down, and took her face into his. He kissed her lips and let his tongue glide with hers. There was a wave of shock around them. Panic and confusion erupted in the Great Hall, and as they parted, a sudden wave of guilt swept through them.

~~

“Yes, yes it’s me Patty.” John said looking tired. He didn’t understand that a woman who he had loved half his life would put herself in a reality where her past was forgotten. He knew why she had done this, but he didn’t understand when approached with the past that the boundaries she had set up for herself were closed off, unable to break down.

She couldn’t speak. She suddenly was trapped in a world she thought long gone. A world where everything she had wanted as a child was a reality. A truth that was unexplainable.

“How…how.” Her emotions controlled her body. “I don’t know what to say…John.” Tears started to spill down, past her cheeks and onto her blouse.

John couldn’t control the feelings rolling around in his stomach. He hated seeing her in pain. He wanted to just grab her and tell her everything was going to be okay, that somehow everything was going to turn out fine. But, he couldn’t promise that. He had to give her the news, the news that their baby was alive, yet in danger.

“This is just too much. I haven’t seen you in years. I thought you were dead. Sometimes I imagined that you were still alive, yet where unable to contact me. Because, I knew that you loved me and if you could, you would come to me.” Her words hit him hard and deep.

“Patty, I understand how you must be feeling. There was nothing I could do. After you gave birth to our son, I couldn’t live with the fact that our only child was gone. I…wouldn’t believe the truth. I know that we were going to give him up, but deep down, I still felt as if something died with me that day. I wouldn’t accept it.

Patty’s face was now filled with confusion. “I…I don’t k now what to say. There are so many emotions and questions rolling around in my head that I can’t focus.” She said as she grabbed her head.

“Patty I know this because I have found our son.” He said quietly. She looked up from her damp hands into his eyes. She had so badly wanted to hear these words. She wanted to know that the child she had once held in her arms was alive and that she could hold him again, tell him that she loved him, and that everything would be alright. She wanted desperately to know that, that was real. But, this was life and the real dreams she had created for herself were only figments of her imagination.

“He is lost to us, I think we both need to accept that, move on and try and move on. John, we have to, or we will never get over the agony and pain that it causes us.” She wiped tears from her face and began to sit up.

John stopped her, pushing her shoulders down back onto the chair. “Patty, listen to me.” his face no longer friendly. He was very frustrated. She was extremely stubborn and he couldn’t stand the way she was dismissing him. He knew that their child was alive and that he had to show and prove it to her.

“There is no other way for me to prove this to you, then for you to see it with your own eyes. Come with me…” he said holding out his hand.

Hesitant, curious, and scared, she took it. She didn’t know where he was going to take her, but if it would help him, she would oblige. Within moments, she was once again, in the arms of her first lover, friend and confidant. It scared her to know what else this day would have in store for her. Was her child still alive? If so, what was he like, would he recognize her or know her at all.

~~

The confusion that surrounded the Great Hall was more than Hermione could handle. She could feel their eyes on her as she and Draco parted. It seemed like forever, looks and glares from both houses piercing disappointment and disapproval and wondering just what had happened between them.

Draco could also feel the stares, stares from his house especially, and a fear of what was to come. He had made a serious mistake and deep down he didn’t care. He didn’t care that they all saw what had transpired between him and Hermione. A small part of him wanted them to know, to see that he wasn’t just a Malfoy, but that a person who had fallen for someone so different than him. He knew it was a mistake to feel this way. But what was done was done. He tried to enjoy the moment of peace, a moment where everything was out there and free. A sense of enjoyment and relief spread through him. He didn’t want to think of the repercussions of their actions and tried not to. He had been so caught up in her beauty and dreams of being free that he didn’t even see the blow to his head come. He fell flat on his face, along side Hermione.

“How could you! How dare you touch her! She is not yours, and she will never be.” Hermione heard Ron say. She too had not seen Ron come up from behind. He was redder than she had ever seen him before. The anger in his face was so overwhelming that she almost felt guilty for what she had done.

Hermione rushed to his side and lifted him off of the ground. “Ronald, you really shouldn’t have.”

His anger seemed to peek and the confusion on his face was devastating “What were you doing letting him do that to you “

Hermione grew silent. She didn’t know what to say, the guilt had spread like a curse, swarming and taking her whole. She ignored his disappointment and helped Draco off of the floor whispering to him “are you okay.”

The annoyed look on his face gave her the answer as he got off of the ground and looked all around. The teachers had yet to make their way over to the fight as students gathered closer to them.

“Why are you angry Ron, disappointed that she chose me over you? Apparently you weren’t a big enough man for her.” Malfoy sneered.

“Draco!” Hermione said louder than she expected.

Ron’s glance went from Draco to Hermione. “How could you Hermione!”

She had never seen him as angry and as mad as she had seen him at that very moment. The look on Harry’s face as she saw him behind Ron was the most disappointing. He looked…sad and yet disillusioned at the very same time. She felt like the night at first had been a dream, everything seemed so magical and at that very moment the dream turned to stone creating a nightmare.

She didn’t even notice McGonagall come up behind them to break up the fight. And as the students walked on by looking at the two of them, she knew that nothing would ever be the same. She knew that she had truly ruined everything and that there would never be a time to go back to what she had once had. She turned to Draco, who was rubbing his jaw.

Tears started to stream down her face.

He didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know how to react. All he knew was that what she lost was because of him and there was no way he could make things better.

She gave him one last glance and stormed out of the room crying.

“Hermione!” he yelled after her, wanting to run after her, but knew that she didn’t want him now. She didn’t turn around and within moments was lost beyond view.

~~

As Draco walked out of the Great Hall a solemn look graced his face. He hated having to deal with the absolute thought of Hermione in pain. He hated knowing that because of him, she was crying somewhere in the castle and not wanting to be with him. As he turned the corner towards his dormitory, he heard a familiar and unwanted voice.

“I always knew that you had a thing for her. You may not have known it at the time, but I knew that someway and somehow it would ruin things for me.”

“Go away Pansy and leave me in peace.” Draco said, not turning around to talk to her.

“Peace? Oh no Draco dear, there will never be any peace for you. How embarrassing the way you treated me today. You’re lucky enough that I am even hear to take you back. Wait until Mother hears about this, oh no, peace is not in your future Malfoy.”

Draco swung around to see her; the obnoxious face drove him insane. The smirk that she had upon her face…well he wanted to wipe it clean.

“Don’t you dare pretend to know me or know what I want Pansy. I never wanted you and your bitch attitude in my bed, family or otherwise. You disgust me beyond belief. I will never marry you. You are scum and I would rather fuck Millicent Bullstrode than you.”

“You are merely a play thing to me. Don’t you understand that Pansy. Do what you will, but I will never place a finger on you again. Is that clear?” he argued loudly, knowing that his temper was only going to give her pleasure.

“You are sadly mistaken dear boy. We have an arrangement. And it disgusts me that you would rather touch a mudblood than me. How pity and self deserving you must be. She must have begged for it. You disgust me.”

“Oh don’t you worry about begging, Pansy, because that’s all you will be doing. Just think, while you’re doing, Merlin’s beard what; I’ll be lying in bed with a woman who actually does get me off.”

The look on her face was priceless. He winked and walked to his dormitory finally free of Pansy Parkinson.

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*Authors Note*: This chapter was short compared to what I normally write. This is only because of what was in it. The next couple of chapters will be a lot longer because of the material it is going to cover. Thanks for reading!