ENIGMA

Plot, new characters, new magical terms and abilities etc. are my intellectual property. If you want to borrow then please kindly ask. JK Rowling's characters and Wizarding Universe are all uniquely hers.

Summary: AU: What if everything we ever read in JK Rowling’s books was real – including the people characterised? What would you do if you found yourself caught up in that reality knowing what was to come? SS, RL, OC

Authors Note: It has been mentioned in the story but now I am noting it here. I am a fan of Diana Gabaldon’s ‘Outlander’/’Cross Stitch’ series and definitely was influenced by that in writing this story – i.e. the Standing Stones and traveling through time. But I also love Philip Pullman’s ‘His Dark Materials’ series and the tv programme ‘Sliders’ and the alternate universes alongside ours idea comes from there no doubt.

Fantasy/Drama

This story is rated R/M.

ENIGMA

Chapter 012: Déjà Vu

In the absence of a personal life Jessica threw herself into her work. She had always been that way. Her thinking was that the busier she was the less opportunity to wallow in self-pity. It was easy enough when she was in the Library, but another thing altogether when she was alone in her own quarters, the Jarvey notwithstanding.

Still no one saw her at meals, and Dumbledore was at a loss as to what could be done to bridge the chasm of repressed emotions keeping she and Severus apart. Alone in the confines of his office, the Headmaster felt guilty for having to lie to her. He had lied, but with the best of intentions possible. He did know why she was meant to come, but just as it was not for him or anyone else to know about her alternate reality and the facts contained in the books it also was not for her to know why her life had so drastically changed. She had come and for the most simplest of reasons, yet one that would have far-reaching implications. It would happen so fast, so instantly, that it would be some time afterwards before Jessica had that understanding for herself.

A chill ran up his back and Dumbledore thought to himself, ‘someone just walked over my grave…’

He stared almost unseeing out of a window facing in the direction of the Astronomy Tower.

“No purpose is served by dwelling on the inevitable…” he said softly as his eyes swept around the room once more and lingered on his Phoenix resting peacefully on its perch.

But he knew Jessica, better than she realised. And he knew that sooner rather than later she would make an attempt to alter what was to come. It was human nature and his Library Sciences Administrator was very much caught up in her own humanity. He expected nothing less from her because she cared so much about the world and people that had become her refuge even in fiction. The Headmaster was well aware of the probable outcome of her efforts and all he could do was make sure that Severus would do the only thing he could when the time came.

xxxXXXxxx

Jessica looked up at the clock on her desk; only 15 minutes let – too late to make on time to the Great Hall. So once again, she was going to have to have dinner in the relative comfort of her rooms with Harvey. Every night at 5:45 exactly Jessica talked herself out of going to down the Great Hall for Dinner. She did the same thing at 7:45 just before breakfast and the same thing yet again at 11:45 before lunch. And at 6pm, 8am and 12pm she cursed herself out royally for hiding away like some lovesick teenager. She wasn’t a teenager, dammit. However, she was lovesick; lovesick and heartbroken.

If Ange were here she’d be telling her to stop wasting her time loving someone she hardly knew who could never love her back. God only knew what Ange would have made of this – what she would have made of the real life Severus Snape. No – she knew exactly what Ange would say: “It’s his loss, the fuckwit tosser! Now get your arse down there with your head high and don’t let the bastard see you sweat! You’re stronger than that now act like it!”

But Jessica couldn’t face him; she just couldn’t bring herself to do it and didn’t know why. She knew what the Headmaster thought – what he seemed convinced of. As in fiction, Albus Dumbledore seemed to know far more about what went on under his roof than anyone gave him credit for. It was the same for those in his care as much as the situations they found themselves in. The more Jessica spent time with him the more she came to understand why he was such a great and powerful wizard: he knew people better than they knew themselves and he was capable of putting aside his own interests for the greater good of everyone.

Oh, she still thought that sometimes he could do better by just being straight with people and to stop manipulating things the way he did by lying by omission or telling a little white lie even if it was for the best. Of course it was easy for her to say on the outside looking in. She didn’t know how Dumbledore could do it – how he could just get on with living a seemingly ordinary life with the tempest that was brewing around them and especially know that he knew her secret. Hindsight is always 20/20 and she had handed him ammunition on a platter – something none of his idiot Divination professors were capable of doing. She’d encountered Trelawney already; if there was ever a charlatan that got lucky it was her.

Jessica turned the clock away from her as she always did and went back to preparing her latest report for the staff meeting coming up. When she next thought to look at the clock it was almost ten o’clock. She’d missed dinner alright – and hadn’t requested anything for herself and Harvey from the kitchens.

“This has got to stop,” Jessica muttered under breath as she rubbed the tiredness from her eyes.

She organised her papers and then realised she needed to sort something out for Harvey if nothing else. “Hey sweetpea you hungry?” she called out.

There was no customary sigh of a squeak as she had come to expect.

“Harvey?”

Jessica padded over to the sofa and looked down. Harvey was fast asleep, surrounded by sweet wrappers.

“That’s my boy,” she said tenderly, looking at his chocolate smeared face. “You’ll end up with a belly-ache if I’m not careful…”

There was a faint rumbling and reassured that Harvey was alright after tucking his blanket around him, Jessica decided to pay a visit to the kitchens

xxxXXXxxx

The castle always seemed eerie and forbidding at night with the students tucked away in their Houses. There were many secrets yet to be discovered within the hallowed walls of Hogwarts – but Jessica was no more interested in them now than she had ever been.

She supposed it must be different for kids brought up in the wizarding world who’d had family attend the school before them. But at that moment she was scared to death – she had always been afraid of the dark and had good reason to be given the dangers that would come from within in a few years time, if Rowling was right. Perhaps she ought to turn around and go back to her quarters – this was usually the point in the horror films of her world where the stupid idiot roaming the one place they shouldn’t met a grisly end.

“Roaming the corridors after curfew?” came a voice, scaring her out of her wits.

“What – oh, Remus! You have a bad habit of sneaking up on me!” Jessica answered in a low hush.

“You have a bad habit of thinking too much and not paying attention to your environment…” came an equally soft reply. “Why are we whispering?”

“Because I’m scared shitless…”

“Oh, well that’s alright then…”

“Cheeky bugger; I lost track of time and thought I’d go to the kitchens for something to eat…”

“All you had to do was summon…”

Too late Lupin remembered that Jessica couldn’t summon the House Elves the way everyone else could. “How about an escort?” he asked gently.

“Even after what I said?”

“In spite of it…”

“You’re too nice to me, Remus.”

“That’s just me…I am who I am Jessica.”

“Why? There’s a reason why you do what you do – or don’t…”

Lupin didn’t answer as they continued to walk.

“If I ask you something…would you answer?” Jessica asked softly as Lupin put an arm around her to stop her from shivering with cold.

“I’d do my best, depending on what it is. The Dark Arts giving you another headache?”

“No, not really. Things are becoming…quite clear…”

They continued on silence and Jessica realised that it was getting darker and darker. And then she understood why: there were no windows at all in this part of the castle – and something about that made her very uneasy. It nagged at her subconscious and she couldn’t place a finger on it.

“Well – what’s this question of yours then?” Remus asked, once again spooking her from her thoughts. “It must be a humdinger for me to catch you out again.”

“It’s erm, a rather personal one I suppose…”

“It’s either personal or it isn’t...”

“Personal; it’s definitely personal…”

She was dimly aware that Lupin had turned to face her, but before she could speak he held up a hand.

“There is someone ahead…” he said in a low voice. “No – two people…”

Jessica froze.

“No!” she said in a hush.

Lupin didn’t catch the look of recognition on her face, focused as he was on who lay up ahead.

“Stay behind me,” he ordered. “It’s probably the twins up to no good as usual – but be prepared to run if it isn’t…”

Jessica nodded dumbly as Lupin moved forward swiftly, but silently with his wand out. There was a bright glow now that lit a small area just in front of them.

“What’s that – in your pocket?” came a cold and deadly voice as they drew near and stopped.

Severus!

“Just a spare bit of parchment…” Harry Potter replied as Jessica thought the same thing to herself.

“Quite old to be a spare… Perhaps I should just… throw this away…”

“NO!”

“No? No! Potter, dear me; such grave concern over a bit of ‘spare parchment’. OPEN IT; NOW!”

There was a paper-like rustling that could only be one thing.

“Professor Severus Snape commands you to reveal your secrets!” Snape hissed dangerously.

“Read it!” he demanded after a brief moment.

There was more tense silence and then it was broken by Snape’s voice once more.

“Go on…!”

“Messers Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot & Prongs…” Harry began. Jessica followed along in her head as he continued on reading. It was definitely different to what she remembered, but the end result was the same.

“WHY YOU INSOLENT LITTLE…!” Severus bellowed, furious at the insults directed at him from the parchment.

“Professor Snape!” Jessica snapped, forgetting herself. Her eyes went wide. This was not how it was supposed to happen! She needed to get out of here and fast before she did something else stupid.

“Miss Newkirk?” Severus asked, clearly taken aback.

“Ah, Harry! I was wondering when you were going to give that back to me. Great fun, eh?” she bluffed without thinking about it. “Zonko’s is quite the business just as the twins said,” she said snatching the parchment she knew to be the Marauder’s Map away from him after moving into the light cast by Severus’ wand.

“It hardly seems appropriate that Potter should be breaking curfew on your accord, Miss Newkirk. And conveniently carrying a bag of products that could have only come from Hogsmeade, where he is not supposed to be under any circumstances.”

“He has a note – from me… to come to the Library…” Jessica replied in an odd voice before she could stop herself. “I was working late again – trying to find some things he needs for you as a matter of fact. He was going to show me some things Ron Weasley picked up for him – I find this all rather interesting…and it helps break the monotony that is researching and writing all these unnecessary essays that have nothing to do with the curriculum set for the term…”

It wasn’t impossible given the direction that Harry seemed to be headed in. But Snape was much too clever to fall for her excuses and both Jessica and Harry knew it. She had also just called him out on his attempt to stitch up Lupin, and there had to be a price to pay for that. All was definitely lost between them. But she’d also meant that for Lupin as well, as she knew he’d set his classes to working on a useless project about vampires.

“The note! Now!” Severus said taking a menacing step forward towards Harry.

“W…What?”

“Cat got your tongue, Potter? As a master of this school catching you clearly out of bounds after curfew I have every right to see this note, if it indeed exists!”

“PROFESSOR!” Lupin said in a slight raised tone of voice. “I hardly think that’s necessary under the circumstances. Surely Miss Newkirk’s word is enough.”

“Well, well, well. Out for a walk by the light of the silvery moon, Lupin? As it so happens I am not in agreement! Empty your pockets, Potter or we can do this in the Headmaster’s office!”

Jessica had on a large baggy men’s-style shirt that covered the pockets of her Muggle jeans. One hand was tucked behind her back and she felt a faint pop in a back pocket. She just managed to slip it out and into one of Harry’s own as Lupin argued with Severus. Harry looked at her in surprise and she shook her head ‘no’.

“’No’ – what, Miss Newkirk,” Snape said returning his attention to her.

“I beg your pardon?”

“You just shook your head ‘no’ at Potter. Don’t waste our time trying to deny it!”

“Not that you really care, but ‘no’ – I don’t think it’s a good idea if Harry and I head off to review the rewrite of his werewolf essay that you keep insisting upon under the circumstances.”

“Is that a fact…” Snape said appraisingly. Jessica was lying to him. He didn’t know how he knew or for what unearthly reason – but she was definitely lying.

Harry whipped out the note and thrust it forward with a slightly shaking hand. Snape snatched the note hard and read it, fuming that for all intents and purposes it just wasn’t possible to catch Potter out this time. His black eyes were filled with loathing as they moved from Harry to Jessica and then back to Harry again. That note had surely just been conjured; if he were a betting man no doubt his office would be heaving with sacks of galleons. Not being able to do anything about the note, he returned his attention to the parchment which Jessica was holding onto so tightly the veins were popping out of her hands.

“That is clearly a Dark Object!” Snape hissed. “And as such…”

“I doubt it sincerely, but there is only one way to find out,” Lupin said as he held out his hand for the map. “I will test it, but I think it will be proven to be a legitimate Zonko’s product.”

Jessica knew she couldn’t protest, as it would seem very odd. She handed over the parchment and wisely decided to stay silent on the matter.

“I… I should get back to my rooms,” she said slowly.

“Yes – why don’t you go back to your hidey-hole like a good little girl!” Snape snarled.

Both Harry and Lupin looked at him incredulously, but Harry was clearly disgusted by Snape’s treatment of one of his favourite staff members.

“I will escort you, Jessica,” said Lupin. “Harry, come with us please. We will see you back to the Tower.”

Snape looked furious and Jessica couldn’t tell what it was that pissed him off more; Harry Potter getting the best of him once again, or the fact that he’d done it with her help and both were aided and abetted by his enemy.

xxxXXXxxx

They had reached Lupin’s classroom where he gave Harry the bollocking Jessica knew was coming. Of course, Remus being Remus he was a cross between ‘Father Knows Best’ and Mr. Chips as always.

“I don’t want to hear any excuses, Harry,” Lupin said shortly. “Your life is in danger. I would have thought that with everything that has happened, hearing how your parents died to save your life when the Dementors draw near would mean more to you. This is how you repay them; throwing away their sacrifice for the sake of a thrill from a bag of cheap magic tricks. I can’t expect you to respect that or to take the threat of Sirius Black seriously, that much is obvious. But don’t expect me to cover up for you again.” Lupin turned to Jessica. “Is there anything you want to add?”

Jessica hesitated; Harry clearly felt lower than he’d done during the altercation with Snape.

“I think you have said enough for the both of us,” she said quietly. Lupin nodded in agreement and then went into his office where Jessica and Harry both knew he would lock away the map.

There was just no argument. Aside from the truth of Lupin’s words, Harry felt doubly bad that he had let him down. He looked over at Jessica who looked just as grim as Lupin explained he knew all about the map.

Of course, Jessica knew that one night fairly soon Snape would walk in to find Lupin’s office empty and the map on his desk, yet another twist of fate taking them all places they would scarcely believe.

But at least she had already had one thing confirmed: she had tried to change the history which would cause that twist of fate and failed miserably. It seemed that it was meant to be and apparently for the sake of the greater good, as much as she found it a bitter pill to swallow.

xxxXXXxxx

Remus and Jessica saw Harry through the portrait of the Fat Lady which guarded Gryffindor Tower and then he escorted her to her quarters. He had been quiet, almost unusually so and Jessica was oblivious to it lost as she was in her own thoughts yet again.

“You asked me if I would answer a question with the truth, Lupin began cautiously. “Can I ask the same from you?”

“Hmm? What – oh well depends on the question… but yes…”

“’Depends on the question’…honest enough I guess….” Lupin said as they reached her front door.

Jessica looked at him with a closed expression and opened the door. Not surprisingly, she could hear Harvey calling for her.

“Damn – I never did get him dinner…”

She rushed in immediately forgetting Lupin.

“Mummy! I woke up and you were gone!” Harvey cried theatrically.

“OK little man I’m here now. I went to go get some dinner…”

The little Jarvey’s eyes widened in horror and then he started screaming the house down.

“Harvey! What’s wrong with you!” Jessica snapped. After the night she’d had, there was little patience left for childish hysterics.

The Jarvey started crying and backed up to the far end of the sofa away from the entrance to their hallway; away from the front door where Lupin stood.

“Werewolf!” Harvey screamed through his tears. “Go away! Werewolf!” he screamed over and over pointing at Lupin.

Jessica turned around slowly to face Lupin after pleading with the still screaming Jarvey to stop – and found that he’d fled.

“Fuck!” she hissed under her breath. “Fuck, fuck, FUCK!”

Harvey kept on howling and Jessica gathered him in her arms.

“He’s not a bad man, Harvey,” she tried to explain. “He just has a…’little furry problem’…”

“Werewolves bad!” the little Jarvey cried. “Werewolves eat Jarveys!”

Jessica couldn’t argue with that. Though it was known that werewolves preyed on humans, if they were desperate enough driven by hunger and bloodlust they would take what they could get their hands on. Jarveys weren’t human as such, but they were humanoid enough. A little butterball like Harvey would be a tasty treat for a werewolf in the wild.

“That one wouldn’t, Harvey,” Jessica explained to no avail. “He’s not like other’s of his kind.”

“No! MUMMY NO!”

“Alright; alright, nevermind that. Mummy won’t bring him around even though he is Mummy’s friend ok?”

Harvey sniffed and his little pouty lips trembled. “I don’t like it…” he whimpered. “I want Daddy!”

“Harvey it is not up to you the company that I keep! Remus can’t help what he is! And he wouldn’t be here if the Headmaster believed he could hurt anyone! Jarveys aren’t liked or trusted either in this world – you aren’t like the rest of your kind and that’s why you are allowed to stay here! You’re no better than Professor Lupin and you need to understand that. You’ve been safe behind closed doors where you don’t have to face the prejudices of this world or your place in it. I can see I don’t do you any favours by going along with what you want. It’s going to stop, Harvey. The day is going to come where you will have to fend for yourself without me; you can’t stay locked away in here forever.”

Harvey wasn’t used to being chastised and Jessica could see that he was hurt by it. But she was not going to go down the thorny road of Severus Snape and what they no longer seemed to mean to him – if they had ever meant anything. Life didn’t always give people what they wanted, and Harvey needed to accept it.

“I have to do what’s right, Harvey. I’m your Mum and I have to raise you as I see fit and do right by you; and in doing that sometimes it’s going to hurt – both of us. I’m not enjoying this…and I am going to start taking my own advice too. But suffice it to say that just as you are unique amongst your kind so is Remus Lupin amongst the werewolves.”

Her eyes wandered over to the doorway leading to the hallway where Harvey was pointing. On the table which Remus had been standing next to was a tray laden with fried chicken, French fries and apple crumble for dessert. There was a pitcher of cranberry juice for her and a small bottle of milk for Harvey. There something else too – a massive slab of what she recognised was Honeyduke’s best chocolate.

Jessica scooped Harvey up in her arms and walked over to their feast, faintly smiling despite her sadness. “Remus, I’m so sorry…” she murmured to herself.

“Mummy where did that come from?”

“It came from our friend Professor Lupin, the werewolf. I never made it to the kitchen and he knew I was worried about feeding you. Remember that before you judge him and scare him off again.”