Triumph Out of the Bitter Taste of Ashes

Rilla -- agreed. I certainly wouldn\'t want to be in his place.
WendyNat, Shemham -- thanks! : )
Zephyr -- LOL, yeah, embarrassing is right. : )~
GeekGoddess -- Thanks! That\'s what I was trying for, but didn\'t want to forget the fact of his temper either. That\'s too much a part of him.
z26, Deb, Anon, LadyTess -- Thank you very much. : ) I\'m glad you\'re enjoying the story.
farfie -- ::smirks:: Glad you liked it.
Kristen, AureliaFlint -- Thanks! Glad to hear you\'re enjoying it. Ahankhanks for the comments about Draco. There\'s nothing worse than not being able to figure out *why*. At least, IMHO.



**********
Chapter Eleven
**********


Severus stared down at Draco Malfoy, almost wanting to cleanse his own eyes with muggle bleach. What he\'d seen, he could have lived his entire life without seeing. He smirked, though, as a renewed blush stole across Malfoy\'s checks. It really did stand out against his nearly white hair and pale skin. The boy shifted uncomfortably, not meeting his gaze for one of the first times ever.

He sighed. \"I understand you had some . . . concerns about Miss Granger\'s return,\" he began, after making sure that Weasley was far enough away he couldn\'t hear the exchange. This really wasn\'t his specialty; though it wasn\'t the first time he\'d played the role of counselor for the Slytherins in his charge. It simply wasn\'t his favorite, nor his most comfortable role. Being \'polite\' enough to be of any use was . . . difficult for him.

Draco\'s head snapped up, his eyes suddenly flaring with raw emotion.

**Yes, boy,** Severus thought, **that\'s better than gazing at the ground like a shy 1st year.**

\"You could say that,\" Draco replied tightly, his voice denying the storm of emotion flickering through his eyes and across his face.

\"Perhaps you would care to tell me why it concerns you so?\" Severus pressed, wondering just what the key was to opening the floodgates in this instance.

**Did he tell Weasley?**

\"Did you, perhaps, have a hand in what happened to her?\" he asked with deceptive nonchalance.

\"NO!\" Malfoy shouted, then cleared his throat in embarrassment at his outburst. \"No,\" he repeated more quietly. \"I didn\'t.\"

\"Someone *in* Ho* Hogwarts had to have placed the port key that ensnared Miss Granger.\"

Malfoy ground his teeth.

\"Did you have knowledge that it was going to happen?\"

\"No!\"

\"Well, then,\" Severus concluded, hoping to goad the young man, \"it seems to me, her current condition should be nothing to you.\"

**Prove me wrong, boy.**

Malfoy gaped at him. \"How can you say that?\" he hissed.

\"Quite easily, I assure you,\" Severus replied drily. **Thank Merlin for the ability to lie through my teeth.**

\"It would be obvious to a blind 1st year!\" Malfoy shouted.

\"Indeed, if that\'s so, then *explain* it to me.\"

Malfoy looked away, not speaking.

\"You do realize, your silence is circumstantially condemning?\"

\"Why would *Granger* scream the moment she saw me?\" Malfoy spat at him angrily, attempting to turn the tables.

Severus hid his smirk. \"I can think of several good reasons,\" he replied immediately, knowing his non-answer would infuriate the boy. \"Why do *you* think she did,\" he continued, smoothly blocking Malfoy\'s attempt. **Come on, boy; spit it out! Stop making me act like an Albus wanna-be.**

\"I *think* my *father*,\" he retorted, his teeth clenched tightly together, the word father spat out like the vilest of insults, \"was the one to hurt her.\"

\"Ah,\" Severus replied, mentally kicking himself when he came out sounding even *more* like Albus. \"And you think this is what? Somehow your fault?\"

\"Of course not!\"

This time Severus waited instead of pushing. He didn\'t have to wait long.

\"When I first came to Hogwarts, I was *so* sure my father was a *god*. He knew absolutely everything. He couldn\'t possibly be wrong about anything. It took everything he taught me to heart. I *believed* it. Muggleborns were the downfall of the wizarding world. Purebloods had to fight back or end up destroyed. I lived that. Everything I did, everything I said, everything I wanted, revolved around that simple \'truth\'. He was above all the bad things I\'d heard whispered in the dark about death-eaters. He had a goal. He wasn\'t some low-life scum that would--\"

Itching to comment, Severus forced himself to remain silent.

\"You know don\'t you that for most of my life I fully intended to follow the Dark Lord? *Be* a true Malfoy; follow in my father\'s footsteps, the whole nine yards.\"

Severus nodded, remaining silent. Now that Malfoy\'s words were flowing, he didn\'t want to take any chance he\'d stop them by saying the wrong thing, by being to condescending, sounding to judgemental.

\"The worst part of all this,\" Malfoy continued, his voice dropping to a whisper so quiet, Severus had to strain to hear it. \"The fact that he was *there* that day, it means he *knew*. He *knew* what was going to happen here at Hogwarts. He didn\'t tell me, *warn* me.\"

A shard of pain shot through Severus. This specific hurt was one he wished he could take away from this boy who\'d already been through so much. To know a parent cared so little as to be able to \'throw you away\', was a pain like no other. He knew *that* from personal experience.

\"It is possible that Voldemort kept it from him,\" Severus began ttivetively.

Draco, however, threw him a disbelieving look and he couldn\'t continue with the \'comforting lie\'.

\"Unfortunately, it\'s very doubtful. I\'m . . . sorry.\"

Draco shook off his rather pathetic attempt at sympathy, gaze firmly locked back on the ground. \"Do you really want to know what made me change my mind?\" he asked suddenly, changing the subject abruptly. \"About following the Dark Lord, I mean.\"

Severus hesitated. He wasn\'t sure he wanted to, but knew a negative answer just might close the boy off. He nodded. \"If you wish to tell me.\"

\"I found out he was a half-blood.\" Draco snorted, shaking his head. \"Not a very profound reason, is it?\"

\"No, it isn\'t,\" Severus replied. \"Is that also why you defended the children, many of whom were muggleborn and mixed bloods?\"

\"No,\" came the quiet reply. \"It was more by then.\"

\"Mr. Malfoy . . . Draco, look at me.\" Using up most of his store of limited patience, Severus waited to continue until Draco\'s eyes met his, then chose his words carefully. \"Whatever reason you chose that started you on this path is . . . irrelevant.\"

Draco started to protest, but Severus held up a cautioning hand.

\"It is, Draco. The point is, you made a choice, and when push came to shove, and you were boxed into a corner, you stuck with that decision, choosing to save lives rather than take them.\"

\"Well, sure, but--\"

\"No buts, Draco,\" Severus said firmly allowing no room in his tone for dissention. What you\'ve chosen isn\'t the easy road. You can take my word for that. But,\" Severus paused. Never an optimist, a \'positive\' person, he wrestled with himself to give such advice to one who would have a long hard time ahead of him. Most of the people he\'d been raised to respect would now look down on him. \"It definitely has its rewards.\"

Draco stared at him long and hard, and Severus fought to allow the blatantly assessing gaze. \"So, you\'re telling me that it\'s worth it?\"

He smirked, and couldn\'t stop the snort. \"It will *not* be some sentimental bed of bloody roses, I assure you,\" he warned, \"but if I\'m completely honest, then yes, it\'s worth it.\" Schooling his features into his more accustomed sneer, he rose gracefully. \"If you tell anyone I admitted that, however, and you will discover what the Gryffindors have known all along, *Mr.* Malfoy.\"
eruserus continued smirking at the boy then, cocking an eyebrow, daring him to ask. It was an even proposition whether Draco would take him up on it. A Gryffindor, of course, couldn\'t have refused the challenge -- well, perhaps except Longbottom, who seemed to swallow his tongue as well as every tiny bit of dexterity he might have ordinarily possessed whenever he came within sighting distance of Severus. A Slytherin, like Draco, would first weight the consequences of what could be taken as impertinence.

\"And what would that be?\" Draco asked warily, wisely sensing a trap, but evidently having decided the risk was worth the information.

Severus snorted; either that, or he doubted the Gryffindors could possibly know anything he didn\'t. Leaning forward slightly, Severus hissed his words. \"Just how vicious I can be in handing out detention chores,\" he said, enjoying the way Draco\'s eyes widened comically as he spun on one heel fully intending to stalk off and give the boy time to think about what had been said.

\"Professor Snape!\"

Glaring in the direction of the shout, Severus stopped and waited. It didn\'t take the out of breath apprentice long to reach them.

\"Madam *pant* Pomfrey *gasp* needs a *gulp* special--\"

Now irritated in earnest, Severus raised a hand to silence the idiotic child. \"Catch your breath *before* you speak,\" he scolded scathingly, wondering why Madam Pomfrey, an otherwise competent medi-witch, always seemed to choose the worst sort of simpering idiots as apprentices. Unfortunately, it seemed that Miss Wolffe was not to be the exception. \"You are incomprehensible and sound absolutely inane, otherwise.\"

Nodding, Miss Wolffe took the time to gulp in lungfuls of air before trying again. \"Madam Pomfrey says Miss Granger needs a special calming potion because of the baby.\"

A horrified gasp sounded behind him even as rage shot through Severus. \"Be thankful I can no longer assign detention nor remove house points from you Miss Wolffe, or Hufflepuff would be in the negative, and you would be spending the next *year* shoveling dung for Professor Hagrid!\" he snapped, his expression hardening unforgiveably. \"You can also be assured,\" he continued, drawling disdainfully, \"Madam Pomfrey will hear of your heinous breach of patient confidentiality!\"

\"Come with me, Mr. Malfoy,\" he snapped, leaving the startled apprentice gaping after them. **Merlin\'s ghost and Circe on a crutch!** Severus sputtered silently. This was all he needed now.

Draco caught up with him, grabbing his arm. \"Tell me it was someone else! Tell me she\'s *wrong*. Tell me what *I\'m* thinking is wrong!\"

Closing his eyes briefly, Severus shook his head. \"I cannot.\" Too much evidence had been discovered. It wasn\'t just Potter\'s nightmares; they had merely set things in motion. When questioned under veritaserum, two separate surviving death-eaters had confirmed Malfoy\'s actions *and* the timing of the order\'s attack.

\"Oh, Merlin,\" Draco gasped, going decidedly green.

Severus grabbed hold of the boy\'s arm as Draco gagged, his body jerking. \"Don\'t fall apart now, Mr. Malfoy,\" he snapped, dragging Draco forward. \"I have to make that potion. You can heave to your heart\'s content once we reach my lab.\"

**Thank Circe, there are facilities attached!** He really didn\'t have time for this if Madam Pomfrey wanted the likes of a calming potion -- considering Miss Granger\'s full circumstances -- but he couldn\'t just leave the boy here.

The potion would take almost an hour to make without the delays Miss Wolffe\'s criminal insensitivity had caused. Livid, didn\'t begin to describe what he was feeling toward that girl.

//She couldn\'t have known *who* the baby\'s father was.//

Severus snarled to himself, startling the pale boy in his grasp.

\"I\'m sorry, Professor,\" Draco muttered.

\"Do not concern yourself, Mr. Malfoy,\" Severus replied firmly, not once slowing his pace.


TBC
Kiristeen
Feedback: Inspirational and Craved. : )
Kiristeen@kiristeen.com


.