Shades of Truth

Shades of Truth

Chapter 11

*****

“Are you sure you’re up to this?” Harry asked Hermione as she pored over the file he’d brought with them. “Because if you’re not well, we can do this another day.”

“Please, Harry, you know me better than that. I don’t let my personal issues affect my work.” She noticed the way he was looking at her and she flushed slightly. “This isn’t the same thing. This is a favor. And besides, Ron and I are doing fine.”

“Set a date?” he asked, unable to resist a small grin.

“Shut up, you.” She shot him a slight glare. “I thought you were supposed to be sympathetic. You’ve been spending too much time around Malfoy.”

“I was just trying to make light.” He shrugged. “To make you feel better about it.”

“I appreciate the effort,” she patted his shoulder. “You’re a bigger help than you know. Thanks. But I’m going to give him a few days before I try to start in on that topic again.”

“Good idea.” Harry nodded, and rose to his feet immediately as Draco entered the room. He moved to meet the other man as the door locked again, but stopped himself when he immediately recalled that Hermione was here, and she had no idea that things between Draco and him had taken such a personal turn. The blonde man gave him a look of confusion that melted into understanding and cold acceptance. Harry wanted to rush over and hold him, to assure him that things between them were the same, but that it was all so new he’d not told anyone, not even Hermione. However, it didn’t seem like the best plan to do that while she watched, so he took his seat again, intensely aware of the fact that Hermione’s eyes were on him, her face curious.

“Are you alright, Harry?” she asked him in a low tone.

“Just a bit anxious.” He admitted, which was at least partially true. He tried to give Draco a look that would convey his hopes and fears and feelings, but the grey gaze would not meet his. It was trained on his companion.

“Your hair.” Draco finally spoke. “It’s different.”

“As is yours.” She cocked her head to one side, not perturbed in the least by his attention. “I remember it being much shinier.”

“I remember yours being much duller.” He replied. Harry couldn’t tell whether it was a jab or not, but Hermione smiled brightly at him.

“And much larger, if you’ll recall,” she held out her hands about her head to bring to mind the bush of hair that had surrounded her head in her school years. “These days, I’m able to take the extra time. Hopefully, we’ll find something today that will get your own hair back a bit closer to its former glory.”

“You flatter me.” Draco gave the tiniest smile. “But you’re right, of course. It was quite glorious.”

“Now then,” Harry spoke up then, feeling distinctly like he didn’t belong, and that something had just taken place which he had no way of understanding. “Let’s get to it.”

“Yes, Harry told me I would need to concentrate on my memory of the death, such as it is. He said that would get you closer to what you need.” Draco wove his fingers together on the tabletop and leaned a bit forward.

“Yes, exactly so.” Hermione gave Harry an odd look before turning back to Draco. “Did he tell you about the risks?”

“Yes, but as I told him, after all the mind fucks I’ve been through, if you’ll excuse the language, I’m sure a few more won’t hurt.” Draco answered her in a perfectly calm tone. Harry remembered the way Draco had acted toward Hermione in school, and he wondered how this was possible, but he supposed that a lot of things had changed for this man since then, just as they had for Harry. “So then, shall we proceed?”

“You’ll want to concentrate. It’s best if you close your eyes to help you picture what happened in your adjusted memory, and then recite the events to us as accurately as possible. Do you know the feeling of Legilimency?” she asked.

“A bit like a garden trowel in my head,” he nodded.

“Well put.” She turned to Harry. “Do you have anything to add, Harry?”

“Only,” he paused, looking down at his hands, looking over at Draco’s, wishing that they were touching, instead of being separated by this table. “I’ll be here the whole time…and I hope it’s a success.”

“Go ahead, Malfoy.” Hermione held her wand ready, and Draco’s eyes fell closed. Harry looked at his hands, fingers unlaced now, palms pressed flat against the table, and knuckles the slightest bit whiter than the digits themselves. He was afraid. Hermione couldn’t see it, she looked as though she thought everything was going fine, but the words came back to his head.

“He wasn’t concerned about his situation until you came, and now he suddenly wants to live. You give him reason to hope for something better, and then you ignore it.”

”He needs a reason to fight.”

“Wait.” He stood up suddenly, and Draco’s eyes flew open in surprise. “Hermione, could you give us a moment alone before we start?” Hermione stared at him in a way that clearly said she had no idea what was going on, but that she fully intended to know everything before she went home that night, and he’d be hard-pressed to stop her from doing just that. She stood up after a moment and nodded sharply, sweeping out of the room.

“What was that?” Draco asked in shock as soon as she closed the door.

“I’m sorry.” Harry lowered his head, staring at his hands before looking back across the table at Draco. “I…I didn’t tell her yet, and I didn’t know what to do, so I panicked.”

“What?” Draco scowled at him.

“About us. I didn’t tell her…about us.” Harry explained, feeling his face suffuse with blood. “I just...it’s so new still, and it’s so mixed up in this, and I know she wouldn’t approve of me doing this while I’m working on your case, and I’ve never even liked another guy that way, so it would be a lot to tell, and she has enough on her plate right now.”

“Oh.” Draco replied after a long pause. “That’s fine, there’s nothing really to tell her, is there?”

“What?” Harry felt as though a weight had just been dropped on his chest. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I don’t need your pity.” Draco replied readily, his tone still as calm and detached as when he’d been preparing for Legilimency. “Don’t worry about hurting my feelings, because I certainly won’t...” he trailed off and looked up at Harry, who had lunged around the table and was suddenly looming over him. For a moment, he looked terrifying, like an avenging angel come to cast judgment, but in an instant, he was on his knees, and Draco had to look down to meet his eyes.

“Do you think this is pity, what I feel for you?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. “Do you think I held myself back when you came in because I was ashamed of you? Do you think that I’m not worried about what we’re doing today? In the war, I fought dozens of Death Eaters, and dueled Voldemort more than once, but today, I am more terrified than I’ve ever been, because if this goes wrong, I won’t have you, now or ever. Are you saying that I never did anyway, and never will? Because I need to know if we’re together or not.”

“Don’t…don’t kneel like that.” Draco responded after a long wait.

“Don’t ignore me!” Harry hissed, and his hands reached for Draco’s, pulling both pairs into his grimy lap. “Don’t change the subject. Not this time. Just tell me the truth.”

“The truth?” Draco gave an airy laugh. “The truth is that you’re the only reason I have for trying to get through this, and if my mother knew about us, she’d disown me, my so-called friends would forget I existed, and I’d really have to rely on you then. And I tell myself it’s stupid to risk so much, but all I can think is that it’s worth everything to have this chance.” He shook his head briefly. “So don’t you depend on me. You’re the stable one, here. At least you aren’t in prison.”

“Draco.” Harry raised a hand to the other’s cheek and felt his breath catch as Draco’s face slowly moved toward his for a gentle kiss, brief and sweet. “Draco, what are we doing?” he asked, before leaning in for a much more desperate kiss. He felt something wet on his cheeks as he pulled away, but he couldn’t tell if the tears were his or Draco’s or both. “Please don’t leave me.”

“I won’t. Not on purpose, at least.” Draco gave him a genuine smile then. “Are you really afraid?”

“Terrified.”

“I’m glad Granger’s doing all the work, then.” Draco teased him briefly. “But I’m still glad you came.”

“Should I bring her back in, then?” Harry asked, and Draco nodded as he stood and their hands separated. He crossed the room and opened the door, letting in a very put-out looking Hermione. The look on her face made Harry quite sure that though he had not told her anything of his feelings for Draco; he would be saying something on the subject to her before they parted ways today.

“Are we ready, then?” she asked in an overly calm voice. Harry could tell she was irritated whenever she used that tone. Great.

“Yes, I was just gathering my thoughts.” Draco told her, and he closed his eyes, immediately reciting a story that Harry had read several times already, in which Remus Lupin turned on the werewolf he was spying on, Fenrir Greyback, and was thrown into the Malfoy dungeons to be dealt with later. According to Draco’s version, the former professor tried to escape and in the chase, Draco cast the killing curse on the older man. During the recitation, Hermione was staring at Malfoy with concentrated intent, waiting for the perfect moment before she used Legilimency, went blank for several minutes, and then signaled for Harry to perform the extraction.

“Is this it?” he asked as he bottled the memory he had taken.

“One way to be sure.” She indicated his waiting Pensieve and they both glanced at Draco, whose eyes were fluttering open. “Though I can tell you what I saw on the other side of the modified memory. Draco was there alright, so were his father and Avery, and another Death Eater. Nott, I think. When Lupin broke out of his cell, they ran to catch him. Draco’s father caught him, and he told Draco to finish him, but he couldn’t do it, so his father called him names, yelled at him a bit more than was strictly necessary, and Avery took the kill.”

“I like that. Can we just not go in and say that we did?” Draco yawned heavily, his head nodding against his chest. Harry gave Hermione a concerned look.

“Should he be like that?” Harry asked, and Hermione nodded.

“It’s not a common procedure, but the records do say it’s extremely taxing, and the other times I’ve had to perform it, the patient was very sluggish for several hours afterward.” She confirmed.

“I don’t think he should be going in the Pensieve like that.” Harry opined.

“We don’t need to go in.” Hermione emptied the vial, muttered something and did an extremely tricky bit of wand work. Suddenly, the scene was cast in three dimensional miniature before their eyes, as though everyone was standing on the rim of the Pensieve. “We can watch it this way.”

“I like her.” Draco offered, yawning hugely again. “Why can’t you do that?”

“Because, I’m cleverer than him by half.” Hermione answered with a teasing twist in her tone. The three of them watched as the scene she had described took place and ended with Draco collapsing to the ground under a Cruciatus curse from his father, at which point it all faded to black. “That’s all I got. But it will definitely exonerate him of that one, at least.”

“Thanks, Hermione, you’re a—“

A loud snore interrupted them, and they turned to see that Draco was now completely asleep in his seat, slumped over it wearily. They looked at each other and both burst into laughter.

“I told you he’d be sluggish.” She told him as he crossed the table to attempt to wake him. “Do you think I should try an Ennervate on him?”

“No, I’d rather wake him naturally.” Harry shook his head. “He’s had enough tinkering for one day. Should we wait a couple weeks before we try this again?”

“At least. I’ve been told it’s one week minimum, so two weeks should give him a good recovery time, but I’d like you to make sure he’s back to full function at least three full days before we do it again.” She advised him.

“Sounds good.” Harry was still gently jostling the other man, who was mostly unresponsive. “I’ll be out in a bit, why don’t you wait for me outside?”

“Oh, I’ll be waiting for sure.” She gave him a smile that let him know she had not forgotten about what had happened before. He rubbed at his temples as she left the room and then bent back to his task.

“Draco, wake up.” He shook the other man’s shoulder lightly, but he only moaned slightly. “Come on, then.” He realized that he was either going to have to shake much harder or try something else. An idea struck him, and he leaned in to kiss Draco, but the mouth that had seemed slack responded immediately. Harry almost leapt back in surprise as Draco started chuckling at his surprise. “You faker!”

“I wanted a kiss goodbye, that’s all.” He shrugged, rubbing at one eye. “Though I must admit, that was rather draining.”

“We got what we needed, though.” Harry smiled as Draco stood and stretched. “Hermione said you’re off the hook for a couple of weeks.”

“But I’m sure you’ll come to check that I’m doing all right.” Draco gave him a mock serious face. “Doctor’s orders and all that.”

“Indeed.” Harry kissed him softly. “She’s waiting for me out there.”

“Good luck with that.”

“She’s going to find out about us.”

“I know.”

“Are you alright with that?”

“Are you?”

Harry answered him with another kiss.

*****

To be Continued…