The Healing

SYGNUS- This is my stress relief, I think if I didnt love to write and read as well, I would go completely insane! I'm glad I can entertain others with my warped way of thinking LOL...


so here is the newest chapter....leading into some....interesting happenings



CHAPTER ELEVEN


“What on earth could you have been thinking?” Minerva McGonagall asked Severus. He was sitting in a chair in front of her desk in Dumbledore’s old office. She had been so shocked to see that her former star pupil had a child, and when she pulled the blanket away she had nearly fainted at the sight of the tiny boy. The likeness was uncanny, and there could be no doubt who had fathered the child.

“I wasn’t thinking.” He said, staring straight ahead, still somewhat numb.

“Severus, she was your student, I never imagined you…”

“She wasn’t my student at the time Minerva.” He said softly. “Nothing happened between us while she was a student here; the idea never crossed my mind, not a single time.”

“Then would you care to tell me what happened? When this gets out Severus, parents are going to start asking questions about your relationship with the students.” Minerva said.

“Hermione was the one who cared for me after the attack, she was my companion during my….exile.” He tugged the cuffs of his shirt nervously. “We became friends, and eventually more. The relationship was brief, and I had no idea about the baby.”

“Severus, why didn’t you take precautions?” She asked quietly, her face flushing. She considered them friends, but this was not a topic of conversation one usually had with a man like Severus.

“I wasn’t thinking about it. I was just caught up in the moment I suppose, the chance to have something good in my life for once.” He closed his eyes and sighed heavily. Minerva felt guilty about giving him such a hard time about it, but she had to know.

“She’s so young Severus, too young to be a single mother.”

“Don’t you think I know that? I know it’s not right, I know it’s not fair and that this is my fault!” He stood and walked across the room to stare out the window.

“I wouldn’t say it’s your fault, she didn’t exactly appear to have been forced.” Minerva said, watching him in amazement.

“No, our relationship was consensual, I am a lot of things Minerva, but I do not abuse women.” He said quietly.

“How do you feel about her?” She asked. Severus thought about it for a long moment, remembering their time together in the cabin, how happy he was. He thought about how his stomach had clenched and his heart had pounded when he realized she was in Hogsmeade, and he thought about how good it had felt to hold his son in his arms.

“I’m not sure Minerva.” He said. “I was happy in that cabin, just the two of us, happier than I have ever been. When I left her, it hurt, and I have thought about her, and missed her everyday since.”

“Sounds like you could be in love with her.” She said, completely awed by the way things were unfolding. She never, not in a million years, would have imagined this.

“Maybe. I just don’t know.”

“And the baby? What will you do about him?” She asked. He smiled and she caught her breath. It was rare to see Severus smile, smirk yes, a smile…hardly ever.

“Wow, did you see him?” He asked. His eyes were wide with wonder as he thought about the baby.

“I did, he’s beautiful. I don’t think I have ever seen a child look so much like his father.”

“Let’s hope he outgrows it.” Severus said with a soft laugh. “I still can’t believe it.”

“Did she say why she kept him a secret?”

“She thought I wouldn’t want him.”

“Do you?” She asked.

“I didn’t plan on ever having children, not with my past. But now that he is here, yes, I want him very much.”

“So what now?”

“I am expected at her home at seven, Filch will be doing patrols tonight.” He stepped up to the side of her desk and looked down at the pile of letters laying there. “What will you tell the parents?”

“That you and Ms Granger met again after she left Hogwarts, and that you developed a relationship then, with an available, and perfectly legal young witch.” She said smiling. “Go on now Severus, you need to straighten things out with your family.”

“My family….never thought I’d have one. Thank you, for understanding.”

“I was in love once too you know, with a wizard much older than I.” She said sadly.

“What happened?” He asked. Minerva looked up at the portrait of Dumbledore behind her desk, he was smiling down at her softly.

“We had a good life together, on our terms. Didn’t we Albus?” She smiled.

“Wouldn’t change a thing my dear.” The portrait replied, winking at Severus. “You could have done worse than Ms. Granger.” Severus nodded, and backed out of the office slowly, leaving Minerva and Albus to talk, no doubt about he and his current situation.


At exactly seven o’clock, Severus stepped up onto the front porch of Hermione’s house. He smiled at the white, wood porch swing as it reminded him of the one at the cabin. She had the door open, and through a screen door he could hear soft music playing and smell something baking. He rang the bell and waited.

She stepped into view wearing a pair of jeans and a white button down shirt, the sleeved rolled up to her elbows. She was barefoot and her hair was clipped up in a wild tangle at the back of her head and a small blue cloth was tossed over her shoulder.

“Severus, right on time.” She said, pushing open the door and stepping aside so he could enter. Her house was cozy, filled with plush furniture and rich wood. Candles and fresh flowers decorated almost every surface, along with several decorative pillows tossed about the sofa and chair.

“Have a seat, I’ll bring us some tea.” She said, directing him to the sofa before disappearing through an arched doorway. She returned with a tray that she settled on a large padded ottoman in front of the sofa. She picked up a silver remote and pointed it towards her entertainment center, turning down the volume on the stereo. “Could you pour? I need to feed Sebastian.” She said, walking over to a small wicker basket and lifting the baby into her arms.

She settled on the sofa beside him, crossing her legs Indian Style and pulling a large pillow into her lap. He watched her fingers as she unbuttoned the top several buttons and pushed the lapel aside. She reached inside and unhooked the flap on her bra and freed her swollen breast, adjusting the baby so that he could latch on to the nipple.

“Does that hurt?” He asked, watching as his son suckled strongly on his mother’s breast.

“It did at first; it takes some getting used to.” She said. “It’s not the same as when you…” She blushed furiously. “Well, it’s just different.”

“Were you well during your pregnancy?” He asked, scooting closer so he could watch his son nurse.

“Yes, I had a very easy time of it actually, aside from the fact that I was huge.” She pointed at the small table beside the sofa. “That’s for you.” She said.

Severus reached over and picked up a small photo album with a red cover. He flipped it open and saw a small black and white, grainy image.

“That was a sonogram photo.” She said. “See that little speck there, that’s his boy part.” She said. He flipped to the next page and exhaled sharply. It was a photo of her standing in a field of heather, her belly rounded beneath a soft white dress, her hair blowing in the breeze. She was smiling as she caressed the mound of her belly and looked into the camera. “I had those taken when I came to look at this house, hard to find a wizard photographer in London. I was eight months there.” She said. He flipped to the next page and smiled, she was sitting in a hospital bed as the nurse handed the tightly wrapped baby to her. She had an odd look on her face as she gazed down at him.

“What were you thinking there?” He asked.

“It was the first good look I had of him, and I was shocked by how much he looked like you, and his crazy hair.”

The next photo was of Sebastian laying on an emerald satin pillow, dressed in a set of white, miniature robes, his eyes closed and his little fists against his cheeks.
“His first photo.” She smiled. “But not the last, I bought a camera recently, and take pictures constantly.” She said.

“Thank you, for this.” He closed the album and set it aside. He watched her as she pulled him from the breast and laid him over the blue cloth on her shoulder. She was patting his back gently as he stared at Severus.

“What are you doing now?” He asked.

“Burping him.” At that moment little Sebastian let out a rather loud, wet burp that had them both laughing. “He likes to eat this one.” She said as she shifted him into her arms and offered the other breast.

“I don’t blame him.” Severus said softly, staring at her breasts. He shouldn’t be interested, after all, their purpose now was to nourish his son, but he couldn’t help it.
Hermione glanced up and gasped softly at the light of desire in his eyes, she had never expected to see that again.

“Severus, if I could go back, I would have told you about him the moment I found out.” She said softly, her eyes filling.

“Don’t, you know I can’t handle your tears, and you keep crying.” He said, reaching up to wipe the drops away.

“I can’t help it, I just had a baby, it goes with the territory.” She said. “Tell me how you have been. Have you met anyone?” She asked, embarrassed by the needy tone of her voice.

“No, there is no one.” He smiled slightly and tucked a stray curl behind her ear. “I have been busy getting back into my job. And thinking of you.”

“Really?” She asked breathlessly.

“Everyday, I missed you more than I thought I would.” He said.

“I missed you too, so much.” She lifted her lips to his and kissed him softly.

“I never expected to be here again.” He said softly, brushing his lips across hers.

“Maybe we shouldn’t have tried to end it, Severus, maybe we should…”

“We could probably come up with a million should haves, but it wont change anything. Let’s just see what happens.” He said. Leave it to Hermione to try and analyze everything and decipher how things should have been done differently. Sebastian began to fuss, drawing their attention back to him.

“Here, why don’t you burp him and I’ll get his things ready for bed.” Hermione pulled the cloth from her shoulder and laid it over his, then shifted the baby into his arms.

“What do I do?”

“Nothing special, just lay him against your shoulder and pat his back until he burps, simple. Just watch out for the spit up.” She said.

“The what?” He began to pat the baby hesitantly on the back.

“He spits….vomits a little sometimes, that’s what the cloth is for.” She said. She left them alone for a few moments as she gathered a pair of sleepers and his bath supplies. “You can bring him in here Severus!” She called down the hall. He appeared a few moments later, the baby cradled in one arm while he wiped his shoulder with the cloth.

“Your warning wasn’t enough, I still managed to get into his line of fire.” Hermione laughed, taking the baby from him.

“You get used to it.” She laid him on the changing table and began to undress him. Severus looked around the room, decorated with tiny silver stars and moons on a midnight blue background. He noticed a photograph of himself on the baby’s shelf, one she had taken on the island.

“You have my photo in here.” He said surprised.

“Yes, I wanted him to be able to see who his father was. I suppose if he had asked to meet you I would have arranged it eventually.” She said as she tossed his dirty clothes into a small hamper.

“I would have found out, you know, eventually he would have come to school.”

“I had considered sending him to Durmstrang.” She said.

“That’s not funny, no son of mine will go to school with those lump headed idiots.”

“Doesn’t matter now, Severus. If you so choose you will have some say in everything about his life.”

“What about yours? Will I have any say so in your life?”

“I suppose that depends on what capacity you plan on being involved with me…” She cocked her head to the side and smiled at him. “Are you trying to hint that you would like to court me Severus?”

“Well, I suppose it’s a little late for that, I have after all fathered a child on you….but yes, I think I would like...to see if what we had in the cabin was something other than just two people seeking to ease the loneliness.” He said.

“I think I would like that very much.” She smiled. “Come here and watch our son, I need to go run his bath.” Severus came to stand beside the table, staring down at the naked baby. Hermione went across the hall into the bathroom and began filling the sink with warm water.

“Hermione! Help!” She ran back across the hall at his call, her heart pounding with fear that something was wrong with the baby. She stopped suddenly and burst into fits of laughter as she watched Sebastian pee on his horrified father.