Cupid Painted Blind

Chapter 11: To love another you have to undertake some fragment of their destiny. ? Quentin Crisp


“You must learn to both block your thoughts and to read others. And quickly please, preferably before I go nuts listening to you dribbling on in my own head.”

The day vanished in a whisper of pages. Snape’s vast private library was a virtual paradise and for the first time in what seemed like forever Harry could appreciate the pleasure that Hermione found in study.

Snape kept prodding away at Harry’s mind until by days end he was being swatted away like a bothersome fly.

“Professor …” when it was answered by a raised eyebrow and a frosty stare Harry tried “ummm Severus” to which a small smile and accompanied nod was certainly a better answer. “Severus, pardon me for asking but how exactly did you find Victor?”

Snape gave Harry a cautious look, more on the glare side but still a moderate version of the patented one he reserved for first years. “Harry if nothing else you should realise that courtesy of Victor’s re-embodiment it is my blood flows in him and in turn in you. Simply put look inside yourself for the answers. I know more about you than you would like and in turn you about me.”

“Personal things, private things, stuff that should never be revealed not even to your closest friends” Snape sighed “On this I will say no more. The triumvirate has a very intense connection; we are in essence three parts of one entity”

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Harry, knowing how private Severus was, stored the information away for later research. He felt Severus creep into his mind and quickly decided on baiting the man. He amused himself mentally undressing Snape whilst to all apparently and quite innocently reading his book, oblivious to the intrusion.

Severus was surprised and aroused by the scene he found playing out in Harry’s head. He snuck a peek to check that Harry was not aware and settled in behind his book to enjoy the moment.

Two lithe pale bodies both with dark hair intertwined arms embracing hands exploring. One was obviously Harry the-boy-who-lived-to-make-life-interesting but the other was taller and the hair was longer, and in the damn way who is that. *Sigh* probably one of his past conquests, still it was a delicious sight.

Snape stretched leisurely in his seat enjoying this moment immensely. Interest stirring he lounged, legs stretched he crossed his ankles. The two visions embraced caressing eagerly, shafts bobbing, bodies glistening. Harry tossed the taller onto his back and making sweet mewing sounds headed south engulfing the throbbing member in his sweet mouth.

Harry’s partner cried out in ecstasy his back arching hands clawing at the sheets. Snape almost came with him, interest throbbing for attention. The man was vocal in his passion and as he rose from the pillows to catch Harry’s lips his hair fell from his face finally Snape could see his roman profile. *by Merlins beard it’s me*

Severus was in a quandary he desperately needed a cold shower and he just as desperately wanted, no needed Harry. He peeked over his book to see that Harry had closed his eyes and dropped a hand into his lap openly caressing himself.

Eternity together was beginning to look very promising, very promising indeed.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

That night in the Gryffindor tower Harry silently praised himself for the wonderful view of a blushing Snape. Making himself comfortable in his bed he closed his eyes and felt around inside for other thoughts, feelings, and emotions.

Saw and knew things, cold painful and dirty, foul things, memories filled with shadows and darkness.
Like a sharp blade it cut at him, a flood of memories invading from every side every last one devoid of even a skerrick of pleasure.

Desperate loneliness, the agony of torment from those Gryffindor Marauders, the pain of rejection from father, the loss of his mother all stark and as fresh as it was this very day.

Empty promises of fame and fortune the agony of betrayal and deceit. He felt his left forearm burn as the dark-mark corroded flesh and ate to the bone, while despair flooded his body.

He saw the foulness of Knockturn Alley in its prime. Felt hands clawing in his hair the sensation of something hitting the back of his throat making him want to gag, the hands in his hair forcing him into a disgusting stench of musk, body odour and shit. A sudden welcome rush of salty fluid and he swallowed, eyes closed against the harsh reality.

Heard a voice cackle “shop here anytime my lovely”, Felt total disdain, saw the bones and for the first time in his life felt immense warmth, relief and love when he held them.

Many times at Privet Drive he had cried for himself and his lot, for an empty stomach for real parents. Now for the first time at Hogwarts he cried himself to sleep, tears for the man he loved who’s lot in life had been as barren as his. As he fell asleep it was with a promise on his lips to make the future special for both of them.

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o—