Tainted White

Hello readers....I hope you will be pleased with this chapter....Thanks to Lala for betaing it so quickly...and for her suggestions...they are always welcome.
Anyway........I need your reviews...as usual.......and it's really nice to see that there is a group of people who review the fic from the begining....you keep me going....:) so, thank you very very much. To tell the truth...I really didn't expect this story to have so many followeres....but I guess that's something I must thank my betas for. So Cassie and Lala....thanks again.

IT STARTS....


Chapter eleven



Draco entered his bedroom...hours later...exhausted.

He felt it the moment he stepped in....there was someone else inside his room.

She was here.

In this room.

He walked towards the bed feeling her presence behind him...stoped in front of it, unbuttoned his shirt and took it of.....slowly...taking a deep breath he sat down......... then she was standing in front of him....keeping the safe distance. She spoke

'I want the truth.'

He just looked at her....'And you think you'll get it?'

No. No more playing games. Hermione was determined to end it tonight. So she ignored his question. She was not in the mood.

'Explain the newspaper.............if they are alive....explain to me, why did the Prophet write about Ron's death?'

He laughed.....'Aaah...Granger....money can do wonders.........' he paused and added... 'It was just that one piece....one copy..........I had it arranged.'

'So you could hurt me? All that...just to hurt me?' she asked.

He just looked at her. And nodded...'Yes, all that to hurt you all.'

She didn't really expect him to confess that easily.

Let him know he hurt you Hermione...even though he's aware of it...vocalize your pain...verbalize....let him hear you. Let him hear what he's done............

'Since the first day...I knew you hated me...I knew you hated me more than anything...but this game...this......' she stopped, wanting him to look at her.

'Do you know how strong this... pain is that it is still growing inside me? Can you comprehend it? So powerful that it is killing everything else.............but I guess that's what you wanted....so...I congratulate you....Malfoy.........you truly are your father's son. '

With that she turned to leave....but he spoke...the words that she didn't want to hear...

' I do know. The pain.........and it was that same father of which you speak that made me go through it too. So I guess you have the right to say that I'm like him....' He got up and walked towards her.

Hermione needed him to stop. Needed him to stay away....

Wanted him to get closer.

He stopped near Hermione...out of reach....do you think he knows what he's doing to you? Do you think he knows that you are aching for his touch...right now....? How is it that he can make you ache? With his voice, Hermione...the sound of his voice makes you tremble.

'But if I am...then why.....why did you come to me? Hmm? Spare me those lame excuses like 'I had no choice, It was a mistake', and so on...Granger, you wanted me....once, then once more....and now, your body wants me again.......It must be hard for you....since I am the man my father used to be............Was it a turn on for a Gryffindor Princess, for the light angel....to know that she was giving herself to a son of Lucifer .....willingly, in the place that comes closest to Hell on Earth?'


' Damn you....you....'

'What...say it. Damn me? What for, Granger? For making you feel good? For making you feel alive, after all the horror you saw and lived in? '

' For taking them away from me..... For playing with my mind...for making me believe that I lost them both.'

He just looked at her. 'Oh, but you did lose them....and you will never get them back.......after what you've done....'

'...are you happy now? Here, you have it all...you've got what you wanted. I'm alone, as are you. You have me destroyed. I admit it...now, to you. You've won.....but there is one thought that comforts me...'

He laughed. Made her feel so small.

'Let me guess...You think I will rot in Azkaban...how stupid do you think I am? There is no evidence against me...I even wasn't a part of the Final Battle. '

'But I saw you...killing Seamus.'

'So you're willing to risk the entire wizarding world finding out about ...us.....?'

In that moment Hermione hated him. Loathed him. That smile that was making fun of her again...................humiliating her again.............Her hand shot up to slap him. But this time he was faster......caught it and slammed it to the wall behind...pressing on her body with his.

And yes...it felt so good.

So right.

She needed him to go further...to do anything...everything...to make her surrender....

'Do not think that you will ever get away with that ...again.' He spat out.

And walked away.

Turned his back at her.

Scream Hermione...........make him come back...

'What do you want from me? Why do you keep torturing me? I can't....' Her voice gave out....

...Play his game Hermione. Use his weakness..............

'I saw you earlier...at her grave.'

He turned to face her ...with his jaw clenched.

'I saw your tears........'

She was doing this to push him over the edge. To make him react. And he knew it.

'I saw the letters...... those words...' She paused as if she wanted to say something else, but changed her mind...Hermione looked at him and asked 'Who are you?'

He remained silent, shortly...before asking quietly, 'Who do you want me to be?', giving her full view into his soul...through those damn silver eyes......she froze.

A boy...a man...just...too beautiful, too perfect, too distant, and yet so close. He looked strong and tired...and yet.....He was still too much...too much for her to take.........and then again...he was not enough. Never enough.

She walked to him. And he drank her in...he took it all in....everything...her skin...curls, curves...lips....even though he knew it all too well......Draco just leaned back and looked......looked at this ...goddess...while in the same breath admitting for the first time....that she was the reason..........she was always the reason. For everything. That he was the broken one. Not her.


He reached out and pulled her closer.....so slowly that she thought she would burst into flames from his touch....from his eyes....it felt like she'd been thirsty for ages, and here in front of her...water was asking to be tasted....

Water poisoned.....


Draco's mind was racing him again...........since the moment he came into this room and felt her here. It started aching....from that very second.......and he could not explain it to himself...Merlin, he tried...to find a logical explanation for the things she did to him...just by standing in the same room.

Tried not to look at her...cause he knew what the result would be.

Tried not to listen to her.

Tried so desperately not to touch her.

But she would not stop. She would not shut up. She would not stay away.

And when she mentioned the grave............it was all still too fresh. The wound was still open...and he could not find the words to stop her. He could not find the way to shut her up.

He could not find the strength to fight her anymore.

He could only give in................he could only reach for her......because that's what his mind, his body was telling him to do.

His soul .

The soul that needed to reveal itself. Needed to show the scars....................

So many scars.

Then let her judge. Let her laugh, or cry...let her glare....let her do anything she wants....just keep her...keep her here.

And she just stood there....beautiful as always. Unreal.

Fairy.

In his eyes...still so pure. He then understood that he couldn't taint her....because she was above it all............and he, realized her love that would always remain white, was on some other level. The one that he would never be able to touch.

He reached out to touch the body.


A little piece of her mind was still fighting her body....and she shook her head lightly.......whispering, hoping he wouldn't listen....'no....don't' ...

His fingers went to her waist, as he sat down on the bed...with her standing in front of him. He found the delicate satin string that was keeping her robe from opening.

He untied it, slowly.....and she closed her eyes....repeating 'please....don't...' he guided her down, to him...made her straddle his lap, placed his hands on her hips...pulled her closer slowly.

Her body obeyed....but her mind still resisted....her mind still begged her body not to give in....

Not again.

Not this way.

Not with both their hearts open.


But the body was daft...

For everything except his touch....

And he leaned in.

Closer.

Brushed his lips over her collar bone and whispered...she almost didn't hear him...but read the words breathed into her skin, 'Don't....don't fight it.'

As if she could.

How good does it feel to have his arms around you Hermione? So good it hurts? This is where you decided to be...where you decided to stay...once more...

How is it that only a touch, a touch that once killed everything inside you, is the one thing that can make you feel alive?

So...all your logic and reason...he trashed it all with a touch...with a breath....

Were you always this weak?

Or is it him?

Is Draco Malfoy what makes you lose your mind?

Hermione shook her head...shook her head to the voice on the inside. And Draco placed his palms on both sides of her head...made her stop...made her look at him...and the shaking started on the inside...

Hermione knew...she knew what was coming up...and she was delighted and frightened.

Again.

With the slightest effort he lowered her face to his...made her whole body come closer to his chest....and she felt him hard against her thigh...it sent a tremor through her body ...and she closed her eyes...tried to block it all out...but the same rhythm of air that hit her skin earlier was now assaulting her lips ' don't....fight it.'

Her eyes snapped open...her head still in his hands 'please....'

I can't ,she wanted to add....but her voice betrayed her...her body betrayed her...body that was already wrapped up in the pleasure it knew was coming...Mind was still hesitating ,terrified of facing the pain that would surely follow. ' please..........I.....I can't...'

I can't go on like this, she wanted to say. I can't be meaningless...to you...anymore....I'm scared, she wanted to say...terrified that maybe this means nothing...to you. I can't be nothing anymore, she wanted to say.

And with one look into her eyes, Draco read it all...... he saw a girl that seemed so helpless...so weak....and suddenly all he wanted to do was to protect her... to reassure her...to make her see that she was so far from nothing.....that she'd become everything...everything that mattered....

'I won't hurt you again.' Came out before he could stop himself...and he pulled her down to his lips.

And they kissed again.

They kissed for the first time.

Like this.

With both their hearts open.

And it hurt. The kiss hurt.

His palms traveled from her head down to her shoulders....stopped at her sides....and he pushed her away a bit. To look at what was his.

He kissed the neck...the breasts.

And her head fell back...she pressed her palms back at his spread knees...She needed air....and the quickened rise and fall of her chest made him mad....mad with desire...need....made his palms slide down her moist skin...down to her waist....

And Hermione felt his fingers digging into her flesh....she felt them pressing into her hip bone so hard that she thought they would melt the skin....and then she felt those amazing fingers working their way into her body....

Her palms went from his knees to his back...her lips sought out his throat...then his earlobe...his jaw...then his lips.

Nails scratched their way down his bare back...ruining the perfect texture of his skin....She started to rock against his fingers...moaned into his mouth...reached between their overheated bodies and wrapped her fingers around his aching penis....and the touch, her first touch made the pain in his groin stronger.

Draco thought he wouldn't make it...he wanted her so badly........He needed her to show him...needed to look into her eyes, needed to see it on her face.

Needed to be sure......that she knew what this was....needed her so desperately not to regret it this time.

And he heard her whisper between his kisses....he was sure he heard her say it......she said 'Draco...'
She said 'Draco...I need you.'

He laid her down...on his sheets...with his tongue still feasting on the sweetness left in her mouth after she'd uttered those words.

He was on top of her...with his fingers still buried inside her.....bringing her closer, building the tension...but the words that were moaned from her mouth through their joined lips made him lose his composure. She said
'please....now...'

A passion stronger than life led him inside of her hot body...
and the look in her eyes brought him a bliss that he had not known still existed.........

He got his answers....the ones he hoped for. She handed them out....when she chose to keep her eyes open. But he was unprepared and his shields fell down too.

In that moment steel, gray eyes melted the ice cold fear. Fear of being nothing. To him.