A Knock at the Door

A Knock at the Door by Pearle

Summary: The war is over and Hogwarts is about to start a new school year. A knock at the door of Severus Snape\'s office is about to change his life and the lives of those around him. HG/SS


Disclaimer: The characters, settings, etc. of the Harry Potter series are not mine they belong to J.K. Rowling and Co. I promise to return them when I am through. Well, most of them anyway.


~~~~~~ A Knock at the Door ~~~~~~

11. Where Are We and What Was That Bump in the Road?

\'Maybe I will go into London and look for a set next weekend after our game.\' Thought Snape. It had been over a month since he had given Silenus the Snape family chess set for her birthday and they were still using it. He had looked in Hogsmeade and could not find a set to his liking. He was sitting in his quarters waiting for his daughter and their Saturday chess game. He hadn\'t realized how much he had come to enjoy their games. In the scheme of things, the time spent together was not all that great, but it meant more to him than even he realized. So he sat now thinking about the coming week waiting for Silenus. Thoughts of Silenus inadvertently lead to thoughts of Hermione and their last confrontation.

He had felt a grim satisfaction deducting points from the know it all Gryffindor, even if Aldid did restore them. Parks. What a prat. What did she see in him? What indeed. He was young, good looking, successful and personablevereverus sighed. What indeed. It was time to take his own advice and join the living. He had never been a particularly nice man. Nice and ex-DeathEater just didn\'t go together. He was not one to have \'relationships\'. He might be a powerful wizard but in the end he was still a man. As a Death Eater he was required to join in the dark revels, and while his sexual appetites ran towards rough and domineering, rape was another thing entirely. After the war was over the papers were splashed with his efforts of spying for the side of the light, his Order of Merlin first class, and the actual financial status of his family. Witches were coming out of the woodwork looking for him. Most if not all would not have given him the time of day if he hadn\'t been the flavor of the moment. He had visited Knockturn Alley before the war but after all the publicity that was no longer an option. He\'d had a few one-night stands but not much else until he attended a Potion Conference in Italy five years ago. He had lectured on a revision he was using with the Wolfsbane potion. One witch in particular had asked pointed and in depth questions about his work. She even sought him out after the lecture was over. Her name was Melinda Marino. She was a native Italian. They stopped in the hotel bar to have a drink and talk shop. He surprised himself by enjoying her company over the next three days. She was intelligent and possessed a sharp wit. The last night of the conference they had ended up in his bed in a tangle of sweaty sheets and naked flesh. Each took what the other had to offer. It turned out to be of mutual satisfaction for both of them. They continued to see each other randomly over the next three years. Dinner, wine, a bit of talking, and unbelievable sex. Eventually they drifted apart. There was never enough interest on either side to try a relnshinship outside of the boundaries they had set for themselves. It had been almost two years since he had last seen her. Maybe he would send Melinda an owl and say he would be in the area next Saturday. He could apparate to Italy just as easily as London. He wasn\'t about to go out looking for a woman. He wasn\'t the type to date. But a few random encounters wouldn\'t be out of line. It was time to join the living.

A buzz sounded alerting him someone was outside the entrance to his quarters. The entranceway had been altered to recognize his daughter\'s presence. A moment later a smiling Silenus stepped into the room.

\"Good afternoon Professor, ready to loose?\" she asked as she took what was now her seat by the fire and set the chess set on the table that had appeared.

\"You seem pretty sure of yourself.\"

\"On the contrary, just stating a fact.\"

\"We shall see. I realize you need to confer with your housemates before deciding on a password in the unlikely possibility you win, but I believe I will set this week\'s password as shredded cockroaches. Shall we?\" Snape was indicating the chessboard. \"Ladies first.\"

Silenus looked at her father. \"The problem is I believe you really like all those gross ingredients as evidenced by the things in your office.\" She was studying the board as she spoke, getting ready to move the King\'s pawn forward.

Snape gave the girl a faint smile. \"So it would seem.\"

And the rest of the afternoon passed in much the same fashion as the other\'s had. They talked of Slytherin House and chances for the house cup. She talked about her friends and classes. And they discussed at great length his research and the next stage to be completed. The time slipped by unnoticed by both father and daughter.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hermione it would seem was not that lucky. She felt every minute was like an hour. She kept checking her watch to verify the time. Aidan had said he never knew anyone who had been able to charm a Muggle wristwatch to work in the wizarding world. It really wasn\'t his fault that the play was insidious. \'Cauldron\'s For Sale\' was a hit musical. The tickets were next to impossible to get. The play was based on the book of the same name and featured the hit song, My Ingredients or Yours? Unfortunately it reminded her of someone else.

Ginny nudged hnd wnd whispered, \"Hermione, are you okay?\" Ginny was sitting to her left and Aidan was on her right. Dinner had been a rather tense affair before the main event of the evening.

\"Yeah. Fine Gin.\" Ginny gave her a look that said who are you trying to kid but refrained from any further comments.

The lights had just come on, signaling intermission. \"So,\" Harry said, \"what does everybody think so far?\" He felt the tension within Hermione. It virtually radiated out of her. He fully intended to talk with her when they
were alone later. At first he thought she was still focused on the attack, but now he wasn\'t so sure. \"There\'s another great song in the second half. Whose heart are you chopping up, the dragon\'s or mine?\"

Hermione burst out laughing. \"Who thinks these things up?\"

Aidan had been fairly quiet most of the night. He watched her interaction with Harry and felt jealous of the close and easy friendship they seemed to share. He wondered if it bothered Ginny too but didn\'t want to ask.

\"How about we go back to my flat for a cuppa and whatever after the play?\" Ginny knew Harry wanted to talk to Hermione.

\"How about we go to your flat next time, it will be too late when the play is over?\" Aidan was diplomatically trying to get Hermione away from Ginny and Harry Potter.

\"Oh Aidan, I\'m sorry. I forgot to tell you. We\'re going looking for wedding robes early in the morning. You\'re right. It really will be late when the play is over. I think I\'ll just go back to Gin\'s tonight. All my things are there anyway. Maybe next week.\" They weren\'t going out in the morning. She just didn\'t want to hurt Aidan\'s feelings.

\"Harry, I think I saw someone from my office go out to the lobby. I\'d like to introduce you to. Come on.\"

\"Who did you see?\" Ginny shot him a look more powerful than an Avada Kedavra. Men could be so dense sometimes. But Harry got up and dutifully followed Ginny out.

\"Now there\'s something you don\'t see everyday. Harry Potter - the wizard that saved the world being put to task by a witch almost a meter shorter than him.\" Aidan looked at Hermione. \"What is it? Why don\'t you want to
stay? Please give me a little more credit than you\'re going shopping. For future reference, you need to tell the friend about the plan and not just spring it on them. Ginny looked a little too surprised at your statement. Hermione. What\'s wrong?\"

Hermione sighed. \"Aidan. I don\'t know what\'s wrong. I just know this doesn\'t feel...right. I really can\'t explain it because I don\'t understand it myself.\"

Aidan was watching her as she spoke. He thought back to the garden the other night. She had been loud and angry and full of emotion. He had never seen her that unguarded since they had been together. He had an idea what was wrong. \"You care for that old bat. Don\'t you?\"

\"What old bat?\" Harry and Ginny had just returned to their seats.

\"That is the most ridiculous statement I have ever heard.\" Hermione was looking at him as if he\'d grown a second head.

\"I saw you Hermione. The two of you were nose-to-nose fighting in the garden. I\'ve never seen you that animated in all the time we\'ve been going out.\" His pride was wounded and it showed in his voice. He couldn\'t imagine her having any interest in the overgrown bat. Well there must have been some interest or they wouldn\'t have a child together.

The lights dimmed and the curtain rose, effectively cutting off all further conversation. Hermione barely heard the second act. Snape?

They stood awkwardly outside the theatre after the play. \"Think about what I said. I\'ll owl you next week. I really care for you Hermione. I think we could be happy together. But you have to decide what you want.\" He gave her a kiss on the cheek before saying good night to Harry and Ginny.

\"Let\'s go back to my flat.\" Ginny said taking Hermione\'s arm.

Xxxxxxxxxxx


They were sitting on Ginny\'s sofa, and and chocolates on the table. \"Was what Aidan said about Snape true?\" Harry\'s gaze was frank. Exactly what was going on?

\"What aboevereverus?\"

\"Severus? Alright, do you have feelings for him?\" Severus. No he was always going to be Snape to him. He respected the man. Snape had saved his life on several occasions. He was Silenus\'s father and a brilliant Potions Master. But he didn\'t have to like him.

\"Come on Harry.\" Hermione actually rolled her eyes at him.

Harry started laughing. \"I\'m serious.\"

Hermione sighed heavily. \"I don\'t know Harry. Aidan is....nice.\"

\"Ouch.\" Harry winced.

\"That\'s my point. When he kisses me its....nice. I want passion. I want my toes to curl. I don\'t want just...nice.\"

\"And with Snape you get more?\" Ginny was curious.

Hermione didn\'t say a word. She didn\'t have to. She blushed from her toes clear to her roots.

\"Okay that was more information than I wanted.\" Harry tried to close his mind to the images that threatened to appear.

\"Wow. We are going to have to talk. I want dls.\ls.\"

\"Ginny!\" Harry was glowering at Ginny.

\"What?\"

\"He\'s an ex-Death Eater. What do you expect?\" Harry turned a little green when he realized what images that brought forward.

\"No. That\'s not it. That\'s just the point. Death Eaters don\'t do what Severus does...uhm did. Trust me, I\'m sure they didn\'t care what pleasure the other person was feeling. But we never went further than that. It was just sex. Great sex. But just sex.\" Hermione had a bit of a silly smile plastered to her face as she thought about what he did with that wonderful mouth and tongue of his. Especially when he hummed.

\"Great. Ginny, do you think you can safely obliviate me?\"

Ginny was laughing. \"Harry, Stop.\"

\"Harry, it\'s been twelve years. We\'ve both changed. He\'s still mad at me for not tellinm abm about Silenus. There wasn\'t anything between us then and there isn\'t anything now. I would just like to be friends for my daughter\'s sake.\" Hermione sipped her tea.

\"I\'d be mad at you too if I had a daughter I didn\'t know about for twelve years. What happened in the garden?\"

A mischievous light shone in her eyes. \"Well he found Aidan and I together so he took points off of Gryffindor for behavior unbecoming a staff member.\"

Ginny was laughing hard. \"You\'re kidding!\"

\"No, so I took points off for unfair teaching. Even better were the points I took off for bad hygiene! Albus ended up restoring the points so no harm done.\" All three were laughing now.

\"At least you were doing something constructive.\" Harry was trying to get himself under control. \"How\'s the kid through all this?\"

\"The kid is great. She\'s thrilled to get to know her father. To tell you the truth, I\'m a little jealous at how well they get along. Don\'t get me wrong. I\'m glad they\'re getting to know each other, but she was juine ine for all
that time. I\'m an only child, I don\'t share well.\" Hermione smiled as she said this but you could see there was truth in what she said.

Harry\'s voice was quiet, \"Hermione, you didn\'t tell her about the attack. Did you?\"

\"You sure know how to bring a room down, don\'t you?\"

\"Hermione?\" Ginny was concerned for her friend.

\"I\'m not sure how to tell her or even if I should. I\'m fine now. It\'s over. In the past.\"

\"She should still know. Are you okay?\" Ginny was still worried the attack was affecting her more than she let on.

\"Yeah Ginny. I\'m fine. I just need a new love interest and everything will be solved. Harry, want to fix me up with anyone else?\"

\"Well, there is this one guy I know...\"

And the rest of the night was spent talking about prospective dates, the up coming wedding, and everyone else they knew as the three friends relaxed with each other.


Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


Monday brought the first snowfall of the season. The students were delighted when they entered the Great Hall to find it snowing inside too. Albus had charmed the snow to disappear several meters over their heads. Snape endured the chicanery with his usual scowl. He was still thinking of what he should do over the weekend. He noticed Hermione at the other end of the table, laughing and talking to one of the new staff members. She was the...what was she? The woman was the new assistant librarian, Sheila something. She was blond, about Hermione\'s age and too happy. She seemed to be all smiles and giggles. Not behavior for someone her age thought Snape uncharitably.

And so it went. Tuesday followed Monday. Wednesday followed Tuesday. And then Thursday showed up.

Snape was watching his daughter as she and Miss Brownynn were mixing the Pepperup potion. He knew she could have taught the class for the number of times she helped Hermione fix the potion for Poppy. Her eyes were rimmn ren red and she had an air of overwhelming sadness about her. He was walking around the room checking on potions awarding and deducting points. Most of the students had completed the potion correctly.

\"Take a small amount of your completed potion and place it in a vial. Write your name on the vial and place it on my desk. Put the remainder of your potion in a sealed beaker. You may leave after you clean your workstation. If you have completed the potion correctly, it will be sent to the Hospital wing for use.\" He was moving towards his desk at the front of the class. \"Miss Granger, I would like to see you after class.\"

Silenus and Jessie exchanged looks. Jessie patted her friend\'s arm for moral support. The gesture did not go unnoticed by Snape. The students never lingered in his class. The last student left as the bell rang. Silenus
followed her father into his study and stood by the side of the desk.

Snape sat in his chair, trying to buy himself time. Where was Hermione? He was no good at teenage girl troubles. \"Is something wrong Silenus?\"

\"No Sir.\" Came the quiet reply. Her eyes were on the desk in front of her. She wasn\'t meeting Snape\'s eyes.

\"Silenus, you look upset. What is wrong? Would you like me to get your mother?\" Snape\'s black eyes were intense. This was new to. Wh. What was wrong with the girl? \"Silenus?\"

Her voice was low. He had to strain to hear it. \"We were studying Grindelwald ais fis followers in History of Magic today. That lead to a discussion about Voldemort and his followers since the anniversary of his
defeat is coming up.\"

Snape went pale and found it hard to breath. He thought he would have more time with her. That they would know each other better before she would find out about the atrocities he had committed. He had regretted ever becoming a Death Eater before this but now it went deeper. He wanted absolution and it wasn\'t his to have. He was sure it was something she couldn\'t understand. He felt as if his heart had been cut out.

\"Were you really a Death Eater?\" Her quiet voice was more painful to him than any Crucio\'s ever cast by the Dark Lord.

He stood, and with a deep sigh and a heavy heart said, \"Come with me Silenus. I will try to answer your questions.\" He led her into his sitting room through the charmed archway in the back wall.

They sat in their respective chairs as the chess table appeared between them. Snape waved it away and looked at his daughter. \"Is it true?\" She asked, finally looking him in the e

\"Yes Silenus, it\'s true. I was young. My family goes back a long way in the wizarding world. The Snape name has a long tradition. I did not believe the Dark Lord\'s plan of ridding the world of impure blood. But I was drawn by the power he offered and by the chance to practice the Dark Arts. I have told you I did not have a pleasant childhood. My time at Hogwarts did not fair much better. There is no excuse for my joining and taking the Dark Mark. Voldemort\'s followers, my only friend Lucious Malfoy in particular, enticed me to join. Shortly after joining I realized what a mad man he was. I went to Albus to tell him about Voldemort and the possible danger to Potter\'s parents. Lily had been my friend for a time when we were at Hogwarts. I did not expect mercy. I only came to Albus to inform him of the danger. I knew he was an honorable man and would at least hear me out. I fully expected to go to Azkaban, but Albus and the fates had other plans for me. He hired me to teach potions and spy on Voldemort and the other Death Eaters.\" His voice was low and hypnotic. Though he was relating the tale to his daughter, it seemed as if he was almost talking to himself.

\"I never knew when the attack on Lily was planned. I would have tried to stop it. A Death Eater namettiettigrew betrayed them to the Dark Lord. Potter\'s parents were killed and baby Harry destroyed the Dark Lord. It was really Lily that saved Harry and killed The Dark Lord. She cast a very powerful spell using ancient elemental magic. The spell is bound and powered by one of the strongest forces on Earth, a mother\'s love. Except the Dark Lord was not truly gone.\" He was absent-mindedly rubbing his left forearm. \"My mark was still dar kne knew he would return. I told Albus and we watched and waited. When Harry entered Hogwarts Voldemort rose to power again. I became a double agent. I\'m sure your mother has told you about some of her adventures when she was at school here with Potter. We worked together on the potion that weakened the Dark Lord after she graduated. It still took another five years before we were able to destroy him. I have no justification for what I did, what I was.\" Snape had fallen silent. He had lost his desire to live. He couldn\'t look at his daughter. He did not want to see the horror and rejection in her face.

Her quiet voice cut threw his thoughts. \"How do you know he\'s really gone this time?\"

\"My mark. After Potter destroyed him the first time, my mark stayed dark. When he destroyed him this time, my mark burned one last time and changed color. It\'s silvery white now. It looks like an old scar. Deceptive really, since it\'s so much more.\"

\"Can I see it?\"

Snape looked at her closely. \"Why would you want to see it?\"

Silenus shrugged her shoulders. \"Curious, I guess.\"

He stared at her another minute before relenting. He pulled up the sleeve to his robe and started on the long row of small black buttons at the cuff of his frock coat. He opened the buttons on the cuff of his white shirt and
rolled the fabric up. There on his left forearm was the outline of a skull with a snake running through it. The lines were a silvery white and looked faded as with time. Silenus reached out a finger to trace the shape. Snape
jumped when her hand made contact with his skin. \"I\'m...I\'m sorry. I didn\'t mean to do that.\" She looked fearfully at him. \"Did that hurt?\"

\"No. It does not hurt any longer. Silenus I cannot justify what I did. I have never claimed to be a good person.\"

\"You won an Order of Merlin.\"

\"Yes, for creating the potion that ended Voldemort\'s reign and for spying for all those years. That doesn\'t justify my joining the Dark Lord in the first place. And that does not change the fact that I did things in both the name of the dark and the light that I will re unt until the day I die.\" Well, he\'d have his Saturday\'s to himself again. She would not want a monster as a father.

\"How did you and mom get together?\"

How, indeed. \"Your mother and I worked on the potion after she graduated from Hogwarts. She stayed here for six months.\" He thought back to their time together. What had Hermione told the girl? Had she romanticized their relationship? \"What did your mother telu?\"

Silenus shrugged her shoulders again. \"Not much. That you two worked together. She told me you were brilliant and that she thought you were a good man. She never really talks about what happened between you, just that she couldn\'t stay here. She was afraid I would be hurt or that she would be killed.\"

Snape\'s laugh was bitter. \"Your mother is a wise woman. She was right. Even if I did not see it that way at the time.\"

\"I suppose you thought mom was dead like everyone else so you didn\'t look for her.\"

Snape looked at his daughter. She wanted a hero, a knight in shinning armor to ride up and save the fair maiden.

\"Silenus, I did look for you mother when she left. But she sent an owl to Albus requesting we leave her alone. Then there was the rumor of her death. I listened but her name never came up. The war was going on. Innocent people were dying. It wasn\'t until she came back that I found out what really happened to her and where she went. I knew nothing of you until she came back.\"

Her voice was quiet again. \"Are you sorry you found out about me?\" She was watching him, waiting for his rejection. The bat of the dungeon, an ex-Death Eater and she wanted his approval.

His voice was rough with emotion. \"Silenus, while I regret most of my life, you have proved to be the only good thing in it. I could die tomorrow and know some small part of me was not evil.\"

\"You\'re not evil.\"

\"Silenus, have you been listening? I am not nice. I am not a hero. I am an old man that is mean and not widely liked. I have no illusions. I know what I am.\"

He had to strain to hear her. \"I like you.\"

\"Thank you Silenus. You will never know how much that means to me.\" She came over to hug him and this time he hugged her back. She was willing to accept him, regardless of how black his heart was. She was his absolution. \"I like you too. Your mother said you were the best part of the both of us. I have to agree. You are better than both of us. I\'m just sorry I didn\'t get to know you sooner. I also believe you must have a bit of Gryffindor in your blood to see any good in an old bat like me.\"

She had curled up in her chair again. Her eyes were clear and bright. \"Can I ask you something?\"

\"I don\'t suppose I can stop you?\" His heart felt lighter than it had in the last thirty years.

She was looking at him. He could tell by her eyes and the set of her mouth that she wanted to ask him something but had changed her mind. \"What do you do for the Christmas holidays?\"

\"Silenus, that was not the question you were going to ask.\"

\"Yes, it was. I\'m curious. What do you do for the Christmas holidays? Do you stay here or go somewhere?\" She had an innocent look in her eye. Obviously this was not the question.

\"I told you about my ancestral home, Snape Manor. Perhaps your mother will let you visit over the summer. In any event, it will belong to you one day. I had thought I was the last remaining Snape, but you have changed that. As for Christmas, I normally stay at the castle and work on potions and my research. Now. Will you tell me what you really wanted to ask me?\"

\"Are you going to read my mind to find out?\"

\"Silenus.\"

\"Ok, ok. We never talked about it. But uhm...\" She took a deep breath, as if to propel the words from her mouth. \"What do you want me to call you?\"

Snape would have laughed if he didn\'t think it would upset the girl in front of him. He wasn\'t sure what she wanted to ask. He was afraid the question was going to be about something girlish or Merlin forbid asking him to explain any thing regarding sex to her. He would speak to Hermione about that immediately. What to call him? She seemed to be holding her breath waiting for his answer. \"What do you want to call me?\" Now that he thought about it, she usually called him sir or Professor. Judging by the look in her eye he was hoping it wasn\'t Sevie or Daddy. He didn\'t think he could stomach either one, too pink and fluffy for his tastes.

\"When we\'re in private, not in class or anything could I call you Dad?\" She was watching his face intently, waiting for his answer.

\"I believe that would be acceptable. Would you prefer I call you daughter instead of Silenus? Or did you have another name in mind?\" He arched one brow as if to punctuate the question.

She realized he was teasing her. \"Well, I was thinking I could change my name to Harrietta. Then you could call me Harri for short.\" Her smile was sunlight in the darkened room.

\"Silenus!\"

The clock over his desk chimed. Both hands had moved to, \"Lunch starts in 10 minutes and the girl has missed two classes.\"

\"I swear that thing is possessed.\" Muttered Snape. \"Well, it seems I will need to speak to Professors McGonagall and Sprout. I\'m sure Albus has informed them you are with me or they would have sent out a search party by now.\"

\"How does he know?\"

\"He just...knows. Well daughter. Shall we go to lunch?\"

\"Okay. Dad.\" She was trying the name out to see if it fit.

Dad. His heart floated in his chest.

The world turned and all was right within it at that moment in time.

TBC

A/N: Well? Too angsty (that\'s a word?)? Too fluffy (all right not fluffy)? Last I heard they hired Alan Rickman to play the lead on Broadway in Cauldron\'s For Sale. I can\'t wait to hear him sing My Ingredients or Yours? Okay enough of that. Questions - Does Harry set Hermione up with someone else? Where is Melinda and will Severus see her? Silenus and the Holidays? More next time. Thank you to all who have reviewed. As always thoughts, comments, reviews, whatever are always welcome. A thank you to Casandra, the Godess, my beta.

Regards, Pearle