Nothing Like You and I

ALERT: TISSUE ALERT!

A/N: So, as you all know this is not the end of the story. Haha, I would never leave a story unconcluded! Psha! This is a bit sad on its own, no where near the last chapter but I found myself getting a little teary eyed. If you can guess which novel Hermione is reading then you will get two million brownie points! (don’t just scroll down to the end, cuz that’s cheating).

alosercanwin – Sadly, no I don’t watch Grey’s Anatomy. I have heard of that story line before but that was a bit after I began writing this story. And no, Hermione does not have a tumor in her brain. There is a very illogical explanation for her seeing Draco. We will have to wait and see, won’t we?

I highly suggest you listen to the songs in the background – if you can – for this part. I find that they fit unusually well with the themes and the world.

Songs:

Partly Here, Partly Gone
The Perishers – Never Bloom Again (listen to it a few times as it’s kinda short lol)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g_vbEMtSano

I Look Up into the Sky and Say…
Phil Wickham – Beautiful
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg4cYdP1ngw


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Partly Here, Partly Gone
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She spent a total of eight months in the confines of a room no larger than her own bedroom of her cottage. The walls were painted white and there was only one window that was enchanted to overlook whatever she felt like seeing. Currently, it was of a lovely beach during a stormy night. The room was decorated sparsely with photos from her friends, newspaper articles about new discoveries, or lack thereof, of Nimue’s Hill, and letters pilled high on a small light brown desk in the corner of the room. Crookshanks went to the Burrow and she last heard that her familiar had gotten into the gnome gardens and chased one into the house. Poor James was so frightened that Mrs. Weasley threatened to cause bodily harm to the cat if he didn’t cease and desist. He did and was now a fat happy cat receiving all the attention from the abundance of grandchildren that visited.

Harry and Ginny were the first to visit her. While they were there, she learned that Ginny was expecting again and felt a small pang of heartache in her own system. She grinned and congratulated them on the pregnancy. Ron came with Luna, who gave her daisies that were enchanted to sing silly songs. Hermione had to shove them in the drawer at night if she wanted peace and quiet. Soon, Remus and Teddy visited her and while she may not have admitted it, she found their visit more uplifting than ever. It was partially because Teddy was so lively and it took away from the mental anguish she was suffering from. Remus was a breath of fresh air as well. No longer tired looking, thin, or frail he sat happily in a wicker chair while six year old Teddy and Hermione played Wizarding Chess. When they left, it was the first time Hermione had asked when she would see them again. Remus promised that he’d visit before the week was out. He kept his promise.

If it was closure that she was seeking, she found it. She hadn’t seen Draco, heard Draco, or even felt Draco since she emerged from the bathroom. There were no signs that he had ever been inside her home or outside of it for that matter. There never was evidence of it. She learned that night that while she may have wanted things to be different her life had taken a turn for the worse. St. Mungos hadn’t diagnosed her with any particular ailment, let alone one that could easily be cured, but she felt comfortable in that she was now in a place that could take her mind off of him.

Four months passed without word or wind from Draco and she finally felt as if she were on the mend. Remus had just been by and when she left, she did the impossible. She kissed him. He was leaving and promised he would be back with a new novel he thought she’d find interesting. They hugged and before he pulled back fully, she kissed him. He kissed back with much fervor and it felt warm and sweet but wrong. Not like how she kissed Draco, when he was in her mind, but it was real. There was passion but not of lovers, more of friends who cared deeply for one another. She had fallen in love with Teddy and Remus, but her real heart was buried with Draco in the Malfoy mausoleum.

She remembered the day they announced his real funeral. She had just checked herself in and was perusing the paper when she came across a photo of him during his seventh year. His face was cold and he looked like he had been through the wringer, but he smirked that same Malfoy smirk she always wanted to slap off his face. Lucius invited her to the funeral and Harry had told her that it might make things smoother for her. He still believed she harbored guilt over Draco’s death. Most people did. Only Snape and Theodore Nott knew the truth.

Today was her last day at St. Mungos. She had received all the treatment they could offer, which wasn’t very much, considering a small epidemic of dragon pox in the area had consumed most of their time. Her bags were packed, scarcely three small tawny brown ones sat at the edge of her bed. The window was enchanted to look at fields of barley and wheat and, for once, it was sunny. There was a small rap on the door, causing Hermione to turn.

“Are you ready?” Remus asked, standing in the door way looking tired but happy.

The full moon had just passed a night earlier and she told him not to come see her off, but he insisted. Hermione smiled and nodded once folding her arms over her chest as he walked in and picked her bags up. She couldn’t return to her cottage just yet and Remus had been kind enough to allow her to stay with him in a flat above a small fish and chips shop in London. She knew he was hoping for more than a platonic relationship, but didn’t want to rush things. Teddy loved her but she knew that she could never replace Nymphadora and she never wanted to. Remus hoisted a small bag between his arm, his hand full with the straps of two others, and brought his free hand to Hermione’s shoulders. She didn’t bother taking a last glance at the room she called home for nearly a year.

They made it back to the flat in record time, thanks to a crazy driver named Bernie on the Night Bus. Hermione was exhausted and allowed Remus to put her bags into a spare bedroom. She stared at the smallish flat and noticed that it looked extremely homely. Teddy’s child broom that would hover a foot in the air sat forgotten next to the ottoman and she noticed that Remus had been reading missives from the Ministry pertaining to a new law they wanted to enact regarding capture of dangerous werewolves. A small smile splayed across her cheeks when she thought of how well he had done for himself and Teddy at the end of the war.

She felt a pair of strong arms around her from behind and closed her eyes. Sighing quietly, Hermione turned around and almost didn’t want to open her eyes, but she did. Her heart fell just a tad when she realized that it wasn’t who she was expecting, more like hoping. Remus smiled empathically at her and brought a hand to her loose curls, brushing it from her face. She leaned into his touch when he cupped her face and brought her hand to his chest.

“You must be exhausted,” he said quietly, wrapping his arms around her, “Why don’t you go take a warm bubbly bath? I’ll make you a cup of tea with lemon before bed.”

“Thank you,” Hermione breathed into his chest, “For everything.”

“You would have done…you did the same for me,” he replied, swaying back and forth for awhile.

She remembered when he had fallen into a rut right at the end of the war. It was during the half year where she told Draco to scram after he had the audacity to comment on Remus’ deteriorating state. In the end, Draco had been right and if she had stepped in sooner then Remus wouldn’t have gone through the bout of depression and alcoholism. Teddy stayed with his grandmother, Andromeda Tonks, during that time and Hermione helped him cope. In a way, it brought them together and they had an understanding of war and heartbreak. Now, he was here helping her and they were being brought together in a different way. She was still unsure if she wanted what everything was leading up to.

Hermione parted from Remus and kissed him on his cheek before heading to the bathroom at the end of the hall. She sat in the tub with her legs crouched up against her chest and closed her eyes. No tears came for the loss of Draco and she had been sure that whatever they had was only in her mind, spurred more after she had regained those lost memories. She inhaled the sweet scent of the perfume in the water. Green tea and lavender was an odd combination but it soothed those achy tears that wallowed at the corners of her eyes.

She sat with Remus in the living room, sipping at his freshly brewed tea in silence. Remus had begun looking over his missives again while Hermione curled up with a book he had gotten her. Some silly romance thing about how a sixteen year old girl could overlook the love of a man so similar to her because she was still in love with another. Her eyes flickered to Remus and she thought for a second. Was she like this girl in one way? Did she not see what she had in front of her and chased a dream? Would she wind up losing everything, her happiness, her sanity, like this girl had? Could she find love in some one else who was so similar to her and let go of what never was? Remus looked up from his missives and she smiled. He returned it. She could. She had to.


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I Look Up into the Sky and Say…
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She had been out of St. Mungos for two weeks and slowly made her transition into the real world. There were small outings including Ron’s birthday party where she made a show of how happy she was. And she was happy. She took Teddy to a park and pushed him on the swings before having a small picnic with just them. There she learned that all he remembered of his mum was that she had bubblegum pink hair and that he missed her. It nearly broke her heart. Remus and her danced at another get together celebrating Molly and Arthur’s anniversary and when they went home that night, they made love for the first time. She slept in the same bed as he did, his arm draped over her waist lightly while his head was buried into her neck. While he slept, she found that she couldn’t.

Hermione made plans to travel to a small convenience store to pick up a few things for dinner. She stood in the mirror and stared at herself. A small silvery scar danced across her abdomen, wounds of the battle, and she found herself absentmindedly tracing her finger over it. Remus appeared behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist. He was wet from his shower and had small bags under his eyes from his recent transformation.

“You are so beautiful,” Remus said sweetly, kissing her bare shoulder.

Hermione spun around in his arms and leaned up when he lowered his lips to hers. Their kisses had always been soft and sensual but drawn out. He tasted like lemons and smelled of mint. Hermione pulled from him when Teddy knocked on the door. Remus gave Hermione her blue blouse, allowing her to quickly dress before opening the door.

“Dad! We’re going to be late!” Teddy whined, bouncing on his heels.

“Were are you two going?’ Hermione asked, buttoning the top of her blouse.

Teddy looked eagerly up at her, “Dad said he was going to take me to watch Quidditch!”

“Really?” Hermione quirked an eyebrow at Remus, who shrugged.

He wasn’t a fan of Quidditch but knew how much Teddy enjoyed it.

“Harry had spare tickets lying around and it’s not really that far from here. I reckon we’ll take the train to the Apparation point,” Remus answered as the trio walked into the living room.

“Will you be back for dinner?” Hermione asked, “I’m making your favorite.”

“Really?” Teddy asked excitedly, bouncing up and down again, “Spaghetti with extra large meatballs?”

“Mhm,” Hermione laughed when his hair turned a bright purple.

“I think we’ll be back in time,” Remus answered, pulling his traveling cloak on. “What are your plans for the day?”

“Outside of shopping, nothing,” Hermione shrugged, “I might head to Diagon Alley and see if I can pick up the latest issue of Hags and Trolls.”

“Boooring!” Teddy whined, racing to Remus as he strode across the room.

“Do you need any money?” Remus asked, digging through his pockets.

He was such a gentleman in that he always thought he had to pay, or take care of her. She was surely capable of doing it herself – especially considering how Lucius so generously gave her an advance on her salary when she took leave nine months ago. She knew it wasn’t from the Ministry’s accounting and that he had felt terrible for the attempted rape and discovering of Draco’s body. She didn’t fight him either and she didn’t know why.

“No, I have money, Remus,” Hermione laughed, leaning in to peck him on his lips. “You two go on and have fun. Don’t stay out in the sun too long or else you’ll get a sunburn like last time.”

“Ok!” Teddy chirped, hugging Hermione around her waist, “C’mon dad!”

“Ok, ok,” Remus leaned in and brushed his lips against Hermione’s briefly, his mustache tickled her upper lip causing her to smile. He smiled too.

She waited until they had left before gathering her own belongings. The streets were rather crowded today as many businesses were beginning to have their spring sales. Hermione popped by a small store and bought Remus a scarf as he had been mentioning the need to get a new one. She knew he was just as frugal with money as she was and thought this would be a nice gesture. Walking down the small street, Hermione stood on her toes as she read the street signs. Oh the pain of being short!

The bell to the small convenience store jingled when she stepped in and was greeted by a portly man with fine gray hair. Hermione said her hellos and wandered down the aisles of the store. She picked up Teddy’s favorite pasts, angel hair, and all the fixings for his favorite meal. She paused when she heard the door jingle again, followed by the owner greeting an apparent regular customer.

“Ah, David! How are you today?” the man said brightly.

“It’s a nice day,” came the voice.

Hermione paused in her musings and stared. She had heard that voice before.

“Here for the usual?” the owner asked, tapping his fingers across the counter.

“I think I’m going to try something outside my comfort zone,” David laughed, his voice sending chilling shivers up Hermione’s spine.

“Always the brave lad,” the owner laughed, waving for David to continue perusing the store.

Hermione closed her eyes when she heard the sound of footsteps rounding the aisle and turned to move quickly. However, she dropped the packet of angel hair pasta but kept walking.

“You dropped this miss,” David said from behind her and Hermione hesitated.

She turned slowly and brought her eyes from his feet all the way up until she met his eyes. Hermione let out a gasp and dropped everything in her basket. The pasta sauce shattered when it hit the floor and she nearly collapsed. He was tall, blonde, and had cobalt blue eyes. His hair was cut short and had bangs that swooped over his forehead.

“Are you alright?” he asked, sounding a bit concerned.

“No,” Hermione whispered, stepping back when he stepped forward.

This wasn’t happening. This was not happening. Hermione closed her eyes and tried to steady her breathing as the owner of the store rounded the aisle as well.

“What happened here?” he asked, coming up to the tall blond man.

“I don’t know. She dropped her pasta and,” David said, shrugging, “Blimey, I’m going to be late for my appointment. I’ll stop by later ok?”

“Yeah sure,” the owner said, waving at David as he stared at Hermione’s frozen expression, “M’am are you ok? Do you need to sit down.”

David placed the pasta onto the shelf and backed away slowly. He turned on his heel and left. All Hermione could hear was the ringing of the bell when the door opened and closed. Her throat had gone dry and she felt like vomiting. A flash of a hand waved in front of her, snapping her from her daze.

“Are you alright?” he asked again, sounding a little agitated.

He probably thought she was on drugs but who knew at this point. Maybe she had inhaled too many fumes on the way over here. Without saying a word, Hermione dashed across the store and burst through the door into the busy street. She looked around but found that David had disappeared entirely. Her heart was beating in her chest so quickly that she felt faint.

She opened the door to the store again and was approached by the weary owner, “W-Who was that?” She asked in a hoarse voice.

The owner chuckled, seemingly having assumed why she was so shocked, “That’s David Dermmot. Every bird fancies him. Comes from some rich family up north.”

“W-what does he do?” Hermione asked, her eyes lingering on the spot where he once stood.

“Frankly I don’t know. He comes in here every day though. Orders the same thing, a tune sandwich,” the owner shrugged, “Do you know him or something?”

“You could say that,” Hermione whispered, “I’m sorry so breaking the jar. Let me pay for that.”

“Oh, no worries m’am,” the owner said cheerfully, “Let me ring up the stuff that you have.”

“Thanks,” Hermione replied dumbly, paying for Teddy’s dinner.

She walked out of the store and closed her eyes. Her mind was playing tricks on her. There was no way that man, that man was who she thought it was. It couldn’t be….

Draco.


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More Author’s Notes
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The book she was reading was Gone with the Wind. She is comparing herself to Scarlett O’Hara in that she had a perfectly suitable man in Remus (who represents Rhett) but dwells on her love for Draco (Ashley). Unlike Scarlett, who loses Rhett at the end, Hermione is wondering if things would be different if she chose to be with Remus fully instead of half loving him. Draco appeals to Hermione’s more passionate side whereas Remus is more of her down to Earth side (Rhett is more of a Draco character in his mannerisms and Ashley is more like Remus, but for her predicament she’s loving a person who doesn’t exist while one who does is willing to give her everything) Hopefully that makes sense. I don’t know. Lol.

I happen to really enjoy Remus as a character, a tormented one, but a really good match for Hermione. Yes, I know he’s twice her age but they have such strong mental characteristics that I couldn’t just ignore. I could have always paired her up with Theodore but I knew that he’d always think he was second fiddle to Draco. What I really wanted was to show that Hermione could have a positive life after Draco – just as Draco had mentioned in the last chapter. Remus and Teddy are both familiar and eager to give their love to her. Yeah… Lol.