What I've become

Chapter Ten

* means Information to follow

Lucius entered his manor after leaving the Ministry as usual his house elf’s greeted him at the door, giving them their instructions and telling them not to bother him until he called, Lucius made his way to his personal library.

Seeing Hermione’s birthmark had reminded him of a story his grandfather had once read to him from The Book of the Ancients.

Once inside the library Lucius searched endlessly until he found the book he was looking for, the book was old and faded as it had been handed down in the pure-blood line for centuries.

Lucius sat down with the book and opened it carefully, flicking to the back he found the page he was looking for and read…

An ancient belief of all pure-bloods was that Sahar Sakshi Slytherin* was the daughter of the famous Salazar Slytherin…not many people knew of her existence and those who did were all Pure-blooded.

It was said that when the child was first born Salazar could sense the childs powers deep within her and a distinctive mark on her arm, Salazar became afraid that the child would come to overthrow him in the future and studied her closely as she became older.

In her teens she came into her full power and her powers were hard to hide away from the other pure-bloods.

Realizing that his suspicions were true he killed Sahar by poisoning her dinner and watched her die painfully and to fully make sure that there was no way for her to return he also killed Sahar’s mother.

Now those who knew of her say that Salazar after killing his daughter and wife had met his demise a week later…No one knew how he had died but next to his body was a piece of parchment with his last words on paper.

“She will return”

At the end of his words was a small diagram with the words
“She will bare the mark”

Next to it was the diagram of a small snake.

Lucius closed the book and swore under his breath.

“So this explains it all.” He mumbled to himself leaning back in his chair. “She has returned…She just needs to be awakened,” Lucius said a small smile crossing his face.

It was well past midnight when Lucius called his house elf Axel to the library.

“Yes master?” He squeaked as he bowed low before Lucius.

“I need you to deliver this letter for me…it has to arrive tonight, so be quick,” Lucius said not looking up from the books in front of him but handing the elf an envelope.

“Yes master,” said the house elf bowing low once again and popping out of the room.

Lucius pored over his books searching for the answers he seeked when a knock at the library door echoed round the vast room.

“Yes!” Lucius growled at the door, already knowing who it was probably going to be and he was right as his wife pushed open the door and walked into the room.

“What do you want, Narcissa?” He asked not too kindly.

“I came to find my husband…and found he would prefer to sit in semi darkness and read an old tatty book than work on his marriage” Narcissa said her voice shaky with lack of sleep and undoubtedly firewiskey.

“Dear….I thought you knew…there is no marriage to save,” Lucius said acidly, Narcissa stood before him her mouth tight, hands on her hips and her chest rising and falling rapidly.

Lucius slid his eyes to Narcissa and looked at her properly for the first time in weeks; he still had to admit that she was an attractive woman but he could also notice her oily skin and the baggy eyes that aged her by ten years.

“Lucius…” Narcissa said slowly, moving more closely towards him.

“Remember how we used to be…when we first met at the Death Eater meeting and we fell in love on our first mission together,” Narcissa said her voice silky smooth with a hint of lust. Reaching out she placed a hand on Lucius shoulder and rubbed seductively, Lucius slid his gaze to Narcissa’s hand. “Or our wedding were you vowed to love me forever, then our honeymoon in Romania,” Narcissa said lowering her head closer to her husband’s ear.

Lucius looked up at his wife’s face and could see the fear of him rejecting her behind her seductive gaze, Lucius sighed deeply trying to find the love he had once felt for her but had lost long ago.

“Why can’t things be the way they used to be?” Narcissa asked flashing Lucius a small smile. Lucius looked into his wife’s eyes and tried to remember why he had fallen in love with her in the first place and his mind went back to that very first time…

He had met her at his very first Death Eater meeting which was held in a gigantic manor in the North of Wales on a high cliff over looking the sea.

The manors great hall was packed with Death Eaters who were all adorned with their Death Eater masks and cloaks.

Lucius along with Severus and ten others were all kneeled before Voldemort with sacks over there heads, Lucius was finding it difficult to maintain his steady breathing and he could tell by the sounds of it the others were too.

Voldemort was sat before them on a throne like chair his eyes scanning over his devoted servants then lingering on his prospective followers kneeled before him.

Getting to his feet the crowd went deadly silent and everyone’s attention was on him alone.

“Welcome…to this, our 50th meeting,” Voldemort sneered to the crowd before him.

“As you may have seen we have some new…meat with us tonight…it is your job to see if they are good enough to join our ranks.”

An outbreak of sneers and jeers followed his words.

Lucius felt one of the prospective followers to his right shiver with fear and he himself was feeling a little nervous.

“Bring the first one forward!” Voldemort boomed, a Death Eater lunged forward and grabbed one of the sacked prospective Death Eater and dragged him or her to the feet of Lord Voldemort.

The sack was whipped off to reveal a fair haired boy whose eyes were darting everywhere.

“I don’t think much of this one milord…a bit nervous.” Cackled the Death Eater who had brought the boy forward.

“What is your purpose?” Voldemort asked the boy who remained, his knee’s shaking.
“I…err…to…err…” the boy stuttered before his voice failed completely.

“Seems he dose not know where his loyalties lie” sneered a Death Eater, Voldemort closed his eyes lazily and shook his head.

“Perhaps you need a moment,” Voldemort mocked and was rewarded with a wave of laughter that rippled throughout the great hall of Death Eaters.

The boy remained shaking on the floor his mouth flapping stupidly his eyes darting from face to face, Voldemort closed his eyes again and shook his head but this time it was followed by a Death Eater grabbing the boy again by the back of his hair and dragging him away all of a sudden the boy found his voice and began to scream so loud it bounced off of the walls.

Lucius listened to the boys frightened screams as he was dragged from the hall suddenly it stopped and Lucius could not help but shudder to think what had happened to the boy.

“Bring the next one…I hope this one is less disappointing,” Voldemort sighed in a bored voice, Lucius felt strong hands drag him forward and his heart rate picked up before his sack was pulled of his head and the sudden light of the hall blinded him.

“Ah you’re Araxes’s son are you not?” Voldemort asked, Lucius replied with a curt nod knowing his father was watching from the crowd.

“What is your purpose?” Voldemort asked again, Lucius blinked and opened his mouth to speak but found it too dry to speak, swallowing he looked up at Voldemort his eyes steady and sure.

“My purpose is to serve you my lord and do your biding without question,” Lucius replied his voice calm and even, Voldemort looked down his eyes piercing Lucius as if trying to read his mind which Lucius reminded himself that he probably was.

“Do you give your life to me in every way?” Voldemort asked his eyes still piercing.

“Yes milord…in every way”

“Bring me my wand!” Voldemort shouted, a Death Eater at his side brought forward a cushion and on it was a handsome wand.

Voldemort picked up his wand and turned back to Lucius, “Stand.” Voldemort demanded, Lucius got to his feet with his head still bowed.

“With this mark you give me your life and soul; you are no longer an individual,” Voldemort said his voice low and serious; all eyes were on him as he raised his wand.

“Present your left arm,” He instructed Lucius who rolled up his sleeve and held out his arm, Voldemort took his wrist and pulled Lucius slightly closer and pressed his wand to his arm.

Pain shot throughout Lucius’s body as Voldemort said an incantation and black ink wove round his arm, fighting for control Lucius bit into his lip and showed no pain on his face, the ink spread and entwined until a skull shape formed on his arm and the pain ceased.

“Congratulations you are now a Death Eater,” Voldemort hissed letting go of Lucius’s arm, Lucius bowed at Voldemort’s feet, the Death Eater who had brought him forward handed him a new cloak and a shining new mask, taking them Lucius slipped into the new cloak and fixed his mask securely to his face and went to join his father who had been watching from the crowd.

Lucius watched as Severus also became a Death Eater and three others, The last to be initiated was dragged forward and the sack was removed,

Lucius could not help but to stare…Not only was this the first female in the perspective’s but also she was breath taking…her blond hair seemed to admit a shiny glow that brightened up the room.
Lucius stared at her lovingly as she went though her initiation until at last she received her mark and changed into her Death Eater attire and came to stand beside Lucius.


Lucius sighed deeply again as he relived the moment he had first met Narcissa and tried to feel that way again, but as he looked upon her he felt…nothing, her hair no longer shone but hung limply around her shoulders.

“Narcissa…I-” he began but was cut short when Narcissa threw herself onto him pressing her lips against his, Lucius started to return the kiss half-heartedly trying to make the best out of a bad situation.

“Just think of something else…just relax,” his mind told him so doing as he was bid his mind and tried to focus on something else as Narcissa’s hand slid under the band of his trousers.

Closing his eyes Lucius tried to force some feeling, opening his eyes he looked into his wife’s eyes trying to picture someone else…without warning Narcissa’s face shimmered before him and her hair colour turned brown and her eyes kind and gentle…the face of Hermione Granger.

Lust rose in Lucius’s groin at the very thought that it was her hand inching down his trousers and not his wife’s.

Snapping out of his trance Lucius got to his feet abruptly making Narcissa fall to the floor with a loud thud.

“Have some self respect woman!” He snarled at Narcissa who was still sprawled on the floor with a hurt look on her face. “I could never love you.” Lucius hissed more to the apparition his mind had created; Narcissa gave a drunken sob and drew her knees to her chest.

“You’re pathetic,” Lucius whispered before spinning round and practically run out of the chamber leaving his wife sobbing on the floor.

(*Sahar = mean’s Awakening in Arabic
Sakshi = means The Eternal soul in Sanskrit

Note:

I have been meaning to add this in earlier chapters but kept forgetting too…In my fic I don’t see Lucius as old as he looks in the films…just try and see him as a younger self when you read please J