Always On My Mind

As soon as he got Hermione into a hospital room, Draco felt much better and more in control of the situation. She seemed much calmer, even though he knew she was in a tremendous amount of pain. She had refused the wizarding version of an epidural because she didn’t want the baby to come out drugged. He was currently rubbing her back and trying to whisper soothing phrases to her, but he felt terribly inadequate.

The mediwitch came in and lifted the sheet draped over Hermione’s lower half to see how far she had dilated. Making notes, she smiled reassuringly at the couple and left again. Her anger at him apparently forgotten, she leaned back into him for comfort as her contraction subsided and her breathing returned to normal. Watching all the movements of her body, Draco was suddenly in awe of it. In a few hours, it would produce another human being into the world, one he had helped to create.

“I can’t believe we’re actually here,” he said.

“I know,” she panted. “I can’t stand the pain, but I’ve never been so happy to feel such pain before in my life.” She smiled up at him and it was so genuine, it almost broke his heart. He thought that she couldn’t get anymore beautiful, but at that moment he knew that Helen of Troy wouldn’t have been able to compare to her. Why did he have to notice now that he was about to lose her?

“I know that now isn’t the time, but I’d really like to talk to you about something, Hermione.”

“Mm?” She had her eyes closed and was enjoying the backrub he was giving her.

“I just want anything between us before the baby’s born and I want you to know that I’d do anything to make you happy. You can live wherever you want, do whatever you wish and I’ll do everything I can to make it happen, even if you want to leave the Manor.” He felt her stiffen under his touch and heard the beeping of monitors, signifying that she was about to have another contraction.

Cautiously, she turned her head and gave him a quizzical look. “Why would I want to leave the Manor, Draco?”

Swallowing a lump in his throat, he steadied himself and replied, “Because you might be happier away from me. I’ll do anything to get you to stay, but I know you aren’t happy and that you don’t love me the way that you used to, which is my fault.” He clarified the last part so that she knew he wasn’t blaming her for anything. Breathing again and blinking back tears, he continued, “If you would be happier someplace else, then I’ll pay for you to live there. I just ask that you stay for the first three months so that I can get to know my son before we arrange a custody schedule.”

Hermione studied him for a moment, biting her lip. “Oh, Draco…” Whatever she was about to say was cut off by a groan of pain and the monitor began beeping in earnest.
The mediwitch bustled into the room, pulling on her gloves and lifting the sheet, exclaimed, “Oh my goodness, Mrs. Malfoy! You are fully dilated and your baby has moved into the birth canal. I’m going to need you to bear down and push, but just lightly.”

Hermione did as she was told and as the baby shifted, she gave another cry of pain and her breathing became more erratic. Draco held onto her hand and she squeezed it, looking at him with panic in her eyes. “It’s okay,” he told her, “I’m not going anywhere; I’ll be here. You are doing so well.” He kissed her forehead tenderly and they waited the contraction to subside. She only had a few moments of respite before the monitor began beeping again.

“Mrs. Malfoy, you’ll have to push a little bit harder this time, the baby’s shoulders are trying to make their way out. You’ll feel some extra pressure, but you’re almost done.” Draco watched in horror as the woman shoved her whole hand into Hermione’s vagina and turned the baby so that he would be at a better angle. As she did this, Hermione whimpered in pain.

“Sh, it’s okay, love. I’m so sorry, you have to go through this.” He pushed her sweat dampened hair back from her face and looked into her eyes.

“Oh, gods, DRACO!” Hermione screamed as she pushed and the baby slid it’s way down until the crown of the head was visible on the monitor. She nearly broke his hand, she was squeezing it so hard, but he didn’t care. She screamed his name and wanted him to stay. When the last of that contraction subsided, tears were streaming down her face. “Oh, Draco, your poor hand! I’m so sorry.”

Draco looked at his hand. It was black and blue and one of his fingers was probably broken, but he didn’t care. “You mean to tell me that you’re apologizing for my hand when you’ve got a baby coming out of you?” She actually smiled and they laughed. “You can break all of my fingers if you want, just come out of this okay.”

The moment was tender, but didn’t last long because another contraction came and the witch began barking orders. “I need you to bear down as hard as you possibly can and push! That’s it! Keep going!”

Hermione grunted and strained and Draco watched as at first, blood poured copiously from her center and then a head with dark hair came into view followed by shoulders and a wiggling body. As the mediwitch pulled his son’s body out of his wife Draco started crying. A nurse used a suction device to remove the mucus from the baby’s eyes, nose and throat and the tiny Malfoy let out an indignant howl of rage at the cold temperature of the room. Once that was done, she gave the squirming child to his father so that he could hold him up for his mother to see. As soon as Hermione saw him, tears of relief streamed down her face as she reached for the tiny being.

“Hello there, little one. Would you like to meet your mummy? Wait until you see her, she’s beautiful.” Draco wrapped his child in the blanket provided by the nurse and placed his son in Hermione’s arms and then enveloped them both in a hug. He was vaguely aware of a nurse taking a picture.

Hello angel. It’s so nice to finally meet you,” Hermione cooed. At the sound of her voice, the baby visibly jerked and looked up at her, trying his best to focus his grey eyes. The muffled voice he’d been hearing for the past few months was now finally clear as a bell. He looked in the direction of his parents a few moments before finally succumbing to sleep. It was hard work being born. As their baby drifted off to sleep, Hermione looked up at him with tears in her eyes and said, very purposefully, “I love you.”

Four hours later, Draco was signing papers and watching his little family. Hermione had been cleaned up and given a healing potion that took care of most of the pain. They had gotten the baby to breast feed and once he had been given a clean bill of health, they were allowed to go home and have a healer check on them the next day.

“Okay, Mr. Malfoy, if you’ll just fill out the birth certificate, I’ll notarize it and you’re done.”

“Birth Certificate?” He and Hermione hadn’t talked a lot about names. Taking the parchment over to her, he sat down next to her wheel chair and looked at her. Her eyelids were starting to droop, but she smiled sleepily at him.

“What shall we call him?”

‘Well,” Draco began, “What do you think of Scorpius?”

Hermione wrinkled her nose. “That’s an awful name! What about Hugo?”

“Scorpius was my uncle’s name, thank you. What unfortunate family member of yours was named Hugo?”

Hermione laughed, “No one, I just always enjoyed Hugo Weaving.”

“Who?”

“He’s an actor.”

“Oh. Well, how about we name him after both of his grandfathers? Marcus Lucius Malfoy?”

“As much as I love my father, I never liked the name Marcus. How about we use his middle name? It was my grandfather’s first name and it would kind of be a salute to you as well since it begins with a ‘D’.”
“Donovan Malfoy,” Draco liked how it rolled off his tongue. “Donovan Lucius…Abraxas Malfoy. I always loved my own grandfather. How does that sound?”

“I think it’s lovely, she said, snuggling baby Donovan closer to her chest. “Donovan Lucius Abraxas Malfoy, you are the most beautiful baby in the entire world! Did you know that?” Even though she was exhausted, Hermione couldn’t have stopped smiling if someone had paid her and Draco could practically see her ripping open at the seams with joy.

They filled out the birth certificate and then Draco had them driven home. Once Donovan had been fed and changed, all three of them laid down together in the bed. Draco held Hermione who snuggled against his chest and held Donovan. They never got to discuss his offer, but Draco was too tired to care. Even if he didn’t have answers, he had a son and his wife loved him. She’d said so herself. He didn’t know what kind of love, but he believed her she said it and that was enough. He drifted off to sleep and if his house fell down around him, he would never notice as long as he had the two people he was holding with him.

I hope you guys find this chapter to your liking. I've never had a baby, so I don't know much about the birthing process. I hope this chapter shows how Hermione's feelings are changing. I've had writer's block with this story and "After Midnight". The next chapter shouldn't take as long to get up and the story is almost through. Thank you so much to everyone who has read and left a review! You guys are all very kind and it is such a thrill to read the nice things you say!