Just Another Snape/Mary Sue Story

“Holy shit!” I hissed, as a shot of
adrenaline hit my system. Fight or
flight, fight or flight? Well, flight,
obviously. I ran into the living
room. “He’s here!style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Holy shit!
What the fuck are we going to do?!”

“What?”
Amanda turned in her chair, obviously saw my panic and leapt to her feet.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “Who’s here? What are you talking about?”

“Slow
down woman,” Snape drawled, obviously seeing my panic and deciding I was being
irrational. “Take a breath or you’ll
faint like the silly muggle you are.”

“Fuck
that! Malfoy must have seen that spell
you did ‘cause he’s coming up the driveway!” I exclaimed.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Amanda let out a small stifled noise,
something between a shriek and a squeak.

“Oh
my fucking God!” she exclaimed in a small, completely panicked voice.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“Lucius
Malfoy I presume,” Snape clarified, narrowing his eyes at me.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “This is… not unexpected.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I knew one side or the other would find me
first. I just didn’t know… which side
it would be.” He got up from the couch
and walked to the kitchen to look out the window. I sagged against the back of the couch, my heart fluttering in my
chest with fear.

“Of
all the characters to arrive next, why did it have to be Malfoy?” Amanda
whined, wringing her hands. I grimaced
at her, empathizing. One of the characters
Amanda found the scariest in the book was Lucius Malfoy, mostly because she
truly believed him to be a psychopath.
She thought he had no soul. I
sighed.

“There
is no one in the driveway,” Snape said, returning from the kitchen.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> He was just replacing his wand in his
pocket.

“But…
he was there,” I whispered as he past me, heading back to the couch.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“He
may have been, but he’s not there now,” Snape replied, settling back down.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “Perhaps his grip on this universe is
tenuous. Or perhaps you were merely
seeing things.”

“I
don’t think so,” I muttered, heading to the door, my fear over-ridden by my
intense need to be right. I hate it
when people don’t believe me.

“Uh,
Terra… don’t you think that might not be the best idea?” Amanda began but I
grabbed the doorknob and flung the door open.
Lucius Malfoy looked a bit startled, but he merely smiled a small,
supercilious smile and bowed slightly.

“I
wonder… could you tell me if Professor Severus Snape is here?” he asked, one
eyebrow arching mildly, completely belying the malicious nature
underneath. I fought the urge to slam
the door in his face, and merely stood there, mouth agape.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “Ah, I see.
You’re some kind of… mute idiot perhaps? Retained by the family within as a servant?style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Kindly show me into the drawing room, if you
possibly can, there’s a good girl.” He
pushed his way past me into the hallway, taking off his cloak and handing it to
me before heading into the living room.

“Professor
Snape?” I called, my voice high with fear.
That had never happened before.
I cleared my throat and felt my heart beating up a bit too high in my
body once again. I hung Malfoy’s cloak
in the hall on a peg before making my way into the living room.

Snape was standing, shaking hands
with Malfoy, a grimace on his face.
Amanda was standing near the window, shaking slightly with fear; I
thought she was about to bolt, personally.

“I’m
glad you found me, Lucius,” Snape was saying.
Malfoy let go of his hand and looked around with disdain.

“I’m
not surprised. To have to stay in this…
hovel is despicable. And how did you
get here anyway?” he said. I was amazed
at how little his lips moved as he spoke – it was almost mesmerizing.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“I
was conjured here by these two women,” Snape said, indicating Amanda and
I. “How, I’m not sure, as it’s obvious
that our magic doesn’t work particularly well here. My own magic is sporadic at best.”

“Yes,
I know. I’m not sure how long I’ll be
able to stay here, truthfully, but I’m going to try and place a kind of lifeline
on you, so that we can pull you back into your proper universe, so to speak,”
Malfoy said, pulling out his wand. “Our
Lord thinks he knows what happened and how to bring you back.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I’m connected to him at the moment – so I’m
grounded in our own universe more than I am in this universe.”style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It seemed to be true; he was, in fact,
wavering and melting slightly at the edges.
“I must perform the spell to link us before my own link with this
universe disappears.”

“Very
well,” Snape said, standing back from Malfoy.
I noticed that the farther he moved from Malfoy, the weaker Malfoy
seemed to be.

“No,
Severus,” Malfoy said impatiently. “You
have to come closer.”

“I’m
sorry, I can’t hear you clearly,” Snape said, moving further back.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I frowned at him and glanced at Amanda.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> She was frowning too.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> We’d heard him clearly, so what was Snape
doing? “You’re obviously beginning to
lose integrity, Lucius. Cast the
spell.”

“I
can’t… you… spell… dammit!” Lucius was trying to speak, obviously, but it was
like he was some kind of hologram or something – he was literally wavering and
fading in and out. Snape moved a bit
further back and Malfoy’s face screwed up in frustration.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I could just see him motioning for Snape to
move closer.

“I
can’t move any further back, Lucius.
Make up your mind!” Snape snapped at the other wizard.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Malfoy threw up his hands and then
disappeared completely. Snape sighed.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “Well, that’s that, then.”

“What
the fuck was that all about?” Amanda demanded, coming back to the centre of the
room from the window.

“Language,
Amanda,” Snape said, shaking his head and sitting back down on the couch.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “That was Lucius Malfoy.”

“We
know that!” I snapped at him. He just
shook his head again, and sighed.

“I
heard mention of iced tea before we were so rudely interrupted?” Snape drawled
and I clenched my fists in frustration.

“Yes
Sir! I’ll get it right away, Sir!” I
said, snapping off a salute (with one finger prominently displayed more than
the others…) and then headed back into the kitchen for the style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It was still sitting on the counter where
I’d left it. The ice cubes were in the
sink still, just a bit melted, so I washed them off and fixed three glasses of
iced tea. Amanda came into the kitchen
to help me carry them in.

“What
the hell was that all about?” she repeated to me, but I knew she didn’t expect
me to have an answer.

“I
have no clue. I suppose we’ll have to
wait for his highness to explain,” I snapped bitterly.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “All I can think of is that he didn’t want
to be rescued by Malfoy. I mean, I’m
seriously glad that he’s gone… but why Severus didn’t want to go with him is
beyond me.”

“I
don’t understand why Malfoy came to rescue him anyway,” Amanda said, picking up
her glass of tea and heading back into the living room with me.style="mso-spaceryes"yes"> I handed Snape his iced tea with a mock
curtsey and then plopped into one of the two chairs opposite the couch.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Amanda took the other one.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“So,”
I started, now that we had our tea.
“Care to explain why you didn’t go with Malfoy when you had the chance to
leave? I mean, you’ve made it clear to
me that you just want to leave this hovel… so I thought pretty much any means
would do.”

“While
I do want to leave this hovel, as you put it, as soon as possible, leaving with
Malfould uld not be my first choice. If
he and the Dark Lord can find me, then it will only be a matter of time – and a
short time I’m sure – before Dumbledore finds me as well.”style="mso-spacerun: yes"> He sipped his tea, making a face.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “This is horrible tea.”

“It’s
from a mix,” I stated flatly.

“So
you’d rather be rescued by Dumbledore than Malfoy,” Amanda mused.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “I guess that makes sense.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I mean, I can’t see Voldemort being overly
friendly to you, even if he does still sort of believe that you’re a loyal
follower. I mean, he thinks you’re
spying on Dumbledore, right?”

“And
how do you know this?” Snape hissed, his eyes narrowed at her.

“Oh
come on,” I snapped in return. “We’ve
read the books, remember? It’s pretty
much all in there, and what isn’t in there has been picked over relentlessly by
every fan there is.”

“Ah
yes, of course. The literature,” he
said, drawing out the word as if it were a complete fallacy that it was in any
way, literature. “And this literature
has told you my exact position vis-à-vis the Dark Lord, has it?”

“Well,
not exactly,” Amanda admitted. “But we
have picked it apart over again and again and it’s pretty much decided that
you’re the one Voldemort wants to kill because he knows you’re not part of the
Death Eaters any more.”

“I
see,” Snape said, a bit alarmed and a bit resigned. “You do know more than I care to admit.”

“Indeed,”
was all I said in reply. I sipped my
iced tea.

“So
you’re going to wait until Dumbledore finds you to leave?” Amanda asked over
the rim of her glass. Snape seemed to
contemplate this as he sipped and grimaced.

“Yes,”
he finally stated, as if this made it all clear. I sighed.

“Well,
then. It’s almost time for dinner, so
seeing as you’re going to be here for awhile longer, I vote we eat,” I said,
draining my glass and getting back up.
“Any suggestions?”

We had difficulty deciding on
dinner that night; everyone pretty much wanted something different.

“I
don’t really care,” Amanda said, crunching on an ice cube from her glass.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “I pretty much only order chicken salads
anyway, so anywhere is fine.”

“You
can’t get a chicken salad at a Thai place, though,” I countered and she
frown/p> /p>

“True.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I wonder what the equivalent of a chicken
salad would be in Thailand?” she mused.

“Severus?style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Any cravings?” I asked, although I kind of
dreaded the answer. He cocked his head
to one side, as if in thought and then frowned.

“No,”
he stated bluntly and I sighed again. I
seemed to be sighing a lot more than usual since he’d come into my life.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“Fine.st"mso"mso-spacerun: yes"> I’ll decide. We’ll go somewhere that has pretty much anything anyone would
want and isn’t too expensive, but also isn’t skanky and has girly drinks,” I
said. Snape looked vaguely scandalized
by this last part, which made me smile.
“Don’t worry. You don’t have to
drink a girly drinpan pan style="mso-spacerun: yes"> You can have a manly
drink, like beer or whiskey or moonshine or something.”style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Amanda giggled at that and got up, heading
for the kitchen to put her empty glass in the sink. “We’ll have to take the subway though – the restaurant I have in
mind is downtown.”

“Can
we go clubbing afterwards?” Amanda asked from the kitchen door.

“Well,”
I started.

“Clubbing?”
Snape asked, his voice a bit worried. I
think he’d had enough, frankly.

“Dancing.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> The restaurant is down where there’s a lot
of nightclubs and stuff. Amanda and I were
intent on going dancing while she was here,” I explained.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Although I hadn’t thought his face could get
paler, it did.

“I
don’t think…” he began but Amanda cut him off.

“Let’s
go dancing! You don’t have to dance,
Severus. You just have to stand or sit
and watch all the pretty bodies moving on the dance floor,” she said, a grin on
her face. I grinned back.

“Exactly.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> And it’s hot enough out that those bodies
probably won’t be wearing too much,” I added.
He drew himself up and assumed a rather haughty look.

“I
don’t think I’m quite so pathetic as to need to enjoy such sport,” he sneered
at us. “I shall be dressing for dinner
if you require me.” And then he stalked
off to the bedroom.

“I
think we should go dancing anyway,” I said to Amanda. “I mean, we’ll just drag him along whether he likes it or
not. And if he doesn’t want to go, we
can leave him in a pub nearby and pick him back up afterwards.”

“Excellent
idea! We’ll get dressed for dancing and
then head to dinner,” she agreed, heading to her own bedroom to get
dressed.

I tentatively entered the bedroom
to get dressed as well, and found Snape looking at himself in the mirror.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“You
look fine,” I said, in an attempt to sooth his ruffled fur a bit.

“I
am well aware of how I look,” he snapped at me. He drew a comb through his hair and then ran a hand down his
shirt front. “This attire seems almost
too thin. I f>I feel vaguely… undressed.”

“Eh.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It’s all what you’re used to, really,” I
said, heading to my closet to find something for dancing.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> I looked at a variety of different k of of
outfits before choosing something that seemed appropriate.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Then I undressed and headed into the
bathroom to refresh my antiperspirant, wash my face, and brush my teeth.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> When I came back out, I found Snape looking
through my closet and holding up a shokirtkirt and top.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “Looking for something different to wear?”

“No,”
he stated flatly, rolling his eyes at me.
“I am choosing something for you to wear.”

“I
think I can choose my own clothing, thanks,” I said, annoyed.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> He looked at what I was going to wear and
then at the clothing in his hands.

I don’t think you can,” he answered.
“This is more appropriate, I believe.”

“You
don’t even know where we’re going tonight!
How the hell do you know what’s more appropriate?”

“Perhaps
I should have said I would prefer to see you wearing this,” he said, handing me
the clothes. I took them and looked at
them. He’d chosen an interesting
outfit, truthfully, and one I would wear if he hadn’t chosen it for me. style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It was all black, of course; the skirt was
very short and very tight, but pretty plain otherwise.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> The top was low-cut and clingy, with a
square-neckline and no sleeves.

“What
shoes would you choose with this?” I asked, contemplating choichoices.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> He looked at the shoes in the closet.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> He took a minute or two to just look at my
few pairs of shoes. Unlike a lot of
women, I wasn’t really into shoes but I did have a few pair of nice boots and
heels. Finally, he chose two
possibilities – the high-heeled slingback pumps I wore the other night and a
pair of knee high black “hooker” boots with a chunky but high heel.style="mso-spacerun: yes">

“Either
would do,” he said.

“Interesting
choices,” I said, taking the boots from him.
“These’ll be easier to dance in.
Now, why don’t you go bug Amanda and choose something for her to wear?”

“Perhaps
I should…” he mused as he left the bedroom.
I sighed and put on the outfit he’d chosen. It’s not like it really mattered which outfit I wore, really, and
this one was a good one for going dancing in.
I got my little black matching purse together, making sure I had enough
bus tickets for the three of us to get there and back, and then went to put on
some makeup. As I was putting on my
lipstick, I could hear Snape and Amanda arguing from her bedroom.

“I
can choose my own outfit!” she was saying to him. “See? I’m already
dressed.”

“Very
well. If you refuse to accede to my
wishes…”

“You’ll
what?”

“I
shall do nothing, of course. It will
merely reflect badly upon you. But you
may be the stubborn, ridiculous and now poorly dressed muggle you so obviously
are.”

“That’s
just a pile of…” I closed the door to
the bathroom. I had a feeling how this
one was going to play out. I was
amazed, of course, that Snape not only had an opinion as to how we should
dress, but was actually able to choose a decent outfit.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Most men were totally incapable of choosing
their own clothing, let alone clothing for a woman. But, I mused as I put on some dangly earrings and a bracelet, he
was quite thotheotheshorse himself, really, so it made sense.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Besidhe che chose black clothing – it wasn’t
like he picked different colours that actually went together.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Choosing black with black wasn’t that
hard. I put my hair up in a ponytail
and then headed out of the bathroom.

style="mso-spacerun: yes">

As we all trooped into the hallway
to get ready to leave, I glanced at Amanda.
She was wearing pink tonight, so it was kind of hard to see who won as
to what she would wear. Snape had a
triumphant look on his pale face, however, so I decided he’d won and she was
wearing the clothing he’d chosen for her.
She had on a little pink skirt in a shimmering material, and a tiny pink
tank top that exposed her mid-riff. Her
pink high-heeled sandals matched her skirt perfectly, as did her little pink
purse. It was a bit much, really, but
no worse than the all black ensemble I was wearing. She had her blonde hair done up in a chignon, with a pink
butterfly clip holding it in place. She
looked very pretty and very, very pink.

“Cute,”
I commented and she groaned.

“I
was going to wear something other than pink, but he,” and she stuck and thumb
in his direction, “decided that something else was necessary.”

“Y’know,
we could’ve chosen our own clothing,” I replied as we headed out the door into
the heat of the summer evening.

“Yeah,
I guess,” she muttered and I knew she was thinking what I was thinking.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> We could tell ourselves that we were
choosing to indulge him by wearing what he wanted us to wear, but really, there
was something almost compelling about doing what he wanted us to do.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> It was kind of sexy to let your lover dress
you, I thought – as though he owned us in some way. Completely contrary to any feminist impulses I had, but there it
was. We headed up the street to the
subway and I handed them each their bus tickets. Snape wrinkled his nose at the smell of the subway, and,
presumably, at the smell of the “muggles” therein, but he gamely followed me
down onto the platform and from there, onto the train.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> He sat stiffly in his seat, refusing to look
around him and looking menacing enough that no one tried to sit next to
him.

“Who
would’ve thunk it?” I asked Amanda in low tones. “Snape, with us, on the subway, heading to dinner and a night of
dancing?”

“If
you can get him to dance, I’ll give you anything you want,” she challenged.

“You
know that’s impossible,” I said, rolling my eyes and glancing at our fictional
lover brought to life sitting across from us.
“I imagine he’ll prefer the pub to the club.”

“Probably,”
she agreed. “But it makes me laugh just
to think about him dancing…” I stifled
a giggle in response and drew a glare from Snape. Oh well. It was
funny.

About twenty minutes later, we’d arrived at the restaurant
and were seated in a booth. Amanda and
I ordered Bellinis, a lovely concoction of peach schnapps, champagne, and
sangria. Snape ordered a beer,
somethEuroEuropean sounding, and then we lapsed into silence to peruse the
menus.

“You seem
to prefer restaurants with unusual menu choices,” Snape finally said, breaking
the silence.

“This is a
west-coast type of place, if that’s what you mean,” I replied.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “I don’t see that the two restaurants we’ve
been to so far have been that unusual.”

“That, and
the food we consumed at your home that first night, have all been either ethnic
or… vay diy disturbing,” he
continued.

“Define
disturbing,” Amanda asked. “I mean,
there’s nothing like tentacles or pus or pumpkin juice on the menu here.”

“Ew,” I
said with a grimace.

“No, that’s true.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> But the combinations of things here…
sesame-cucumber mayonnaise? Or goat
cheese, fresh strawberries and spicy-glazed pecans? Ridiculous. This is not
food. It’s…"

“Art?” Amanda mused, with a
smile. “You’ve been eating at Hogwarts
for too long. Those house elves only
make food teenagers will eat.”

“Exactly.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> And that’s pretty much limited to chicken
legs and corn on the cob,” I agreed.
“Although here it’s mostly poutine and pizza.”

“Poutine?” Snape asked, closing
his menu with a snap.

“Fries with gravy and cheese
curds,” I answered absently.

“Disgusting,” he said with a grimace.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> Our drinks arrived and the waiter stood
ready to take our order.

“I shall have the prime rib with
garlic mashed potatoes and vegetables,” Snape said, forcing the waiter to turn
to him first.

“Right. I’ll have the chicken caeser salad,” Amanda ordered and I
laughed.

“Of course.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> A chicken salad… I’ll have the seafood
pasta. And we’re going to start with
the spinach-artichoke dip,” I said. “We
have to; it’s amazing,” I told Amanda as the waiter took our menus and we
sipped our Bellinis. Snape sipped at
his beer and for the first time, made a satisfied face.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> “Wow.
You like something.”

“There are many things I like,
Terra. Many things indeed,” Snape said,
his expression becoming suddenly a bit coy and I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, we’ve noticed,” Amanda
muttered into her drink. I smiled.style="mso-spacerun: yes"> This was going to be a long and very strange
evening.