Harry Potter and the Forbidden Desires

Warning: This story takes place during seventh year, and nearly all of the Horcruxes have been found and destroyed. Only two remain. Draco is not shunned entirely from the Slytherins...yet, nor is Blaise Zabini.

~~

November 4

He walked through the halls, sighing as he conjured up a mental picture of himself snuggling into his warm bed covers in his room. He only had a few minutes before class started since lunch was just about to be over. Luckily, he left Hermione with the excuse that he was going to study in the library and finish homework so that she would stop her nagging.

Yeah right. Homework. He had better things to do...like sleep.

Too lost into his own thoughts, Harry didn't notice a door to his left open suddenly at his approach until a pair of hands and lips were on his own. He struggled for a moment until he recognized the red hair and blue eyes. "Ron," he softly breathed. "What--?"

Before he could say anymore, a hard tongue dove inside his mouth, wiping anymore thoughts of speaking from Harry's mind.

~~~~

Two months earlier

Harry was startled from his musing out the window when he heard the compartment door open. In stepped two very familiar figures. "Hey guys," he said, his voice detached and broken, which he tried to fix quickly before they could notice. But Ron looked at him strangely. "H-How was your summer?"

He got a small chorus of "Fine" from them and a look from Ron as they sat across from him.

"I met a boy over the summer," Hermione abruptly added, blushing slightly. The boys looked at her.

"Really?" Harry asked, not really interested. He tried to be, for his friend's sake, but he couldn't. Hermione didn't notice his weary expression.

"Yeah. He's really nice. Kind. Smart. Friendly. He likes to read a lot."

"Sounds like a Ravenclaw," sniggered Ron.

Hermione ignored him. "His name is Jacob. We spent a lot of fun time together."

"Sounds great, Hermione," Harry said, forcing a smile.

"Yeah, when do we get to meet him?"

Hermione's beaming grin vanished. "That's the thing, I don't think I ever will see him again. I don't think he's a wizard, and I certainly didn't tell him what I was. I won't see him for another year, and by the time I do... He'd already have forgotten me."

She stayed quiet for some time, and Harry and Ron didn't dare break the silence. Until...

The compartment door slammed open and three shadows stood in the entrance. "Well lookie here, boys," a high pitched voice laughed. "It's wittle Potty and his wittle friends!"

"Shut it, Parkinson," Ron growled, standing with his hand clench hard around his wand. Harry joined him, careful to block Hermione from the Slytherin trio's greedy eyes. She was already upset as it was. Hell, he wasn't in the mood himself, but he had to distract his dangerous thoughts somehow.

"Oh look, Potty and the Weasel are protecting the overgrown fuzz ball from us evil snakes," Pansy went on, her smirk growing as she watched them. From behind Pansy, Harry glimpsed Blaise Zabini and Draco Malfoy. He glared.

"Why so silent, Malfoy?" Harry spat, glad to have something to focus his anger out on finally. "Too busy wanking that you need your girlfriend here to do your dirty work?"

Ron laughed at that, but Pansy sneered.

"Watch your damn mouth, Potter, if you know what's good for you." With that, she whipped out her wand at the same time that the boys pointed theirs at her.

"I'm a prefect," Ron growled, his eyes flashing. "I suggest you leave or I will dock points. Worse, I'll have to tell the Headmistress and then she will have to punish your arses. I don't think she'll like that very much." He gave them an evil grin.

But it didn't effect Pansy. "Oh, I'm sooo scared of the wittle Gryffindork prefect," she mocked in a babyish voice, though her eyes blazed.

Harry felt his temper rising. "Malfoy, get your girlfriend here to leave before she has her face permanently disfigured."

To Harry's surprise, the boy did step forward, but not to take Pansy away. His wand hovered inches away from Harry's nose. "You talk too much, Potter," he sneered, his silver eyes cutting. "I should fix that disgusting habit of yours." With that, he punch Harry hard in his cheekbone.

Just like that, spells were flashing and flying within the little room and out in the corridor. Harry, his cheek cut and bleeding, aimed a spell at Malfoy to disarm him and another at Pansy. Malfoy only barely dodged it, but Pansy wasn't so lucky. In rage, she leapt at Harry just as Ron had shot a spell at Blaise, which missed by miles. Harry moved in time and was about to stun her until a loud voice shouted, "Enough!"

It was Hermione, and her wand was leveled at all of them. They all froze.

"Malfoy," she started, her teeth gritted hard. "I expected better of you since you yourself are Head Boy now, but I should have known better. Quit wasting your time with trivial pursuits against us and do something worthwhile, like leaving us the hell alone. Voldemort" -she ignored the winces from Ron, Pansy and Zabini- "is still alive and out there to kill us all. Focus on him and not on stupid House rivalries." She took a deep breath, her eyes glistening with tears, before she continued in a soft whisper. "I'm tired of living like this, in fear, and fighting isn't helping. Harry, Ron, and I have a job to do. So we would appreciate it if you Slytherin lot would grow up." The tears finally fell at the end, and Harry wanted to comfort her. But her short speech had stunned him, reminding him of his duty...his future.

All of a sudden, the hollow feeling he had developed throughout the summer, and had tried very hard on fighting away, was back. With vengeance. He watched silently as the Slytherins finally took their leave.
He didn't notice the pairs of eyes that lingered on him as they left.

When the door closed, Harry turned back to his friends and glimpsed the weary look on Hermione's face. She was right, he thought. There were more important things than fighting with the Slytherins. Harry's job was to finish off Voldemort--forever. All of the horcuxes except Nagini and one another had been destroyed. Harry had to plan his strategy, prepare himself, discuss with the Order about their allies, and...

"Hey Harry..."

Harry glanced up. "Ron?"

"Your cheek, mate. Let Hermione heal it." He gestured to the girl beside him, who sniffed, as if to remind him of her presence.

"Come here, Harry," she said. "We need to get that fixed before the train stops." He let her cast the necessary spell and he reached up to touch his smooth skin.

"Thanks Hermione," he said softly.

She grinned wistfully. "No problem, Harry. I just wish you hadn't pushed Malfoy so far."

Harry glanced down, sheepish. "Yeah, sorry about that. I guess I let my anger get out of control again."

The girl nodded. "I hope you guys listened to what I said."

"We did, Herms, and you're right," Ron said. "There are more important things that we need to focus on. We need to stop fighting with those gits and get on with life. This is our last year, and we can't spend it with just fighting, am I right?" All he got were blank looks. "Guys?"

"I think that's the most intelligent, if not only, thing I've ever heard you say," Hermione said in awe.

"Hey!"

"She's right, mate," Harry told him. "What brought on the speech?"

Ron turned red. "Uh, I-I don't know. I'm just tired of all the fighting, too, I suppose."

"That's good, mate." Harry smiled.

"Hey," Hermione spoke up. "Let's promise to try and get along with the Slytherins from now on."

Harry and Ron were both a bit hesitant, but eventually agreed. She was right after all, and who dared defy the great Hermione Granger? They should at least try.

After a few more hours on the train and much idle conversation, the Hogwarts Express arrived at the Hogwarts. Harry, Ron, and Hermione boarded the nearest carriage that would lead them to the castle. Two fellow Gryffindors were already inside, chatting, and the boys looked up and smiled.

"Hi guys," Dean said, with Seamus beside him. "How were your summers?"

"Fine," Hermione said. "I went to France with my mum."

"We got to visit Charlie to see the dragons again," Ron answered too.

Harry stayed quiet.

"How was yours, mate?" Seams asked from across him. The boy shrugged.

"Same old, same old," he mumbled. But they still looked at him. "Um...I spent lots of time with my cousin...a-and my Uncle, who was on vacation for a few weeks. My aunt wasn't around much, though." He knew why he was rambling, of course, and he ignored the looks he received from Hermione and Ron. They both knew that he didn't get along well with his muggle family.

"Oh, you three sound like you had a fun summer," Seamus said, grinning. "But you didn't go to any parties, now, did you? I did. It was brilliant! I met..."

Harry soon tuned him out, on accident of course. His thoughts led to his summer before he could stop them, however, and the memories began to play out.

~~~~

"I thought I told you to stay in your room!" his Uncle's voice boomed.

"I-I'm sorry. I was just hungry a-and I thought I-I'd start dinner a bit early..."

"You eat when I say you can! Get over here, boy!" And meat sausages for fingers grabbed onto Harry's wrist to drag him upstairs.

"No, Uncle! Please let me go! I-I'm sorry!"

"It's time you've learned your pathetic place in my household, you freak. I've put this on long enough."

"Uncle?" Harry asked, his eyes going round as his Uncle led him into his small bedroom. "Wh-What...?" His uncle threw him aside and Harry heard a loud thunk as his head collided with the window sill on the far side of the bedroom. His head lolled and Harry saw his Uncle approach him...with a belt in his hand, the metal shining in the bright sunlight.

"No...!" Harry gasped, struggling against the grown man. "Please Uncle, I'm sorry I came out of my room without your permission! I won't do it again!" His back was already sore from last night's beating, and the boy didn't think his skin could take another thrashing.

"Oh no, boy," his Uncle leered. "I'm not going to whip you with my belt this time." His evil smirk grew as the boy's eyes grew round with horror, watching as his Uncle unzipped his pants and stepped out of them. "You're lucky your aunt is gone for the weekend, you freak. Now...come here, boy..."

~~~~

"Harry? Harry! Harry!"

Ron stared at the shaking boy in front of him, and concern filled him as his eyes met dim, hollow ones. "Harry!!" He finally shouted.

The boy shook out from the exploding images in his mind and glanced around, his eyes finally filling with recognition along with a bit of color.

"R-Ron...? Where...Where did every body go?" Harry asked, his voice emotionless as he looked around the empty carriage.

Ron gulped down the lump in his throat as he looked at Harry's pale form, and helped him climb out of the carriage. "They're up at the castle, mate," he said softly, holding Harry steady as they brought up the back of the group of students leading towards the Great Hall. "Hermione went ahead without me to instruct where the first years should go so I could help you." Ron didn't expect a response from Harry, but it still shook him when there was none. He sighed and suddenly stopped walking, looking at Harry with a very serious expression on his face.

"Ok, Harry, I noticed how funny you've been acting since the train, but I didn't tell Hermione. She's got enough to worry about, or at least she thinks she does. I knew you wouldn't like it if she knew, anyway." There a long pause, and if Ron was waiting for some type of reaction, he was dearly disappointed. He sighed again. "Something happened this summer, didn't it?" he decided to bluntly ask.

All he received from Harry was a reluctant nod.

"Will you tell me, Harry?" he asked softly.

Harry looked at him, his emerald eyes suddenly going round, his face pale. "P-Please don't let him get to me, R-Ron. I-I'll...I'll die..." the boy pleaded, hanging on desperately to Ron's robes. The red head boy grew still, shocked. "I-I can't tell you. I'm sorry, but not n-now. Please, Ron..." His body shook terribly and it hurt Ron to see his best friend acting like this.

"It's alright, mate," Ron assured him, gathering Harry into his arms. "Just tell me when you're ready, ok? I'm here for you, Harry."

Harry nodded and pulled away. He followed Ron, staying near him out of caution and fear, as they walked into the Great Hall in silence.

~~ Hey, this is the first chapter. (obviously) I know it sucked, but I had to get some things out before I could really get into the story. Don't worry, next chapter will be much better. Hoped your like! R&R please!