Letters to Lovers

A/N: No dark lord, no attraction to granger, inter house rivalries still in existence, Set in seventh year





Weasley,

The school term has just started and already you are causing problems. I saw you staring at me in Transfiguration. Didn’t that bushy hair mudblood tell you that it’s rude to stare at ladies?

Keep your eyes to yourself, or I’ll poke them out.

P. Parkinson



Parkinson,

Wow, not two weeks into school and you make assumptions. Well, if you must know I wasn’t looking at you. No, I wasn’t. I was looking at your tits. You really should be more guarded when you lean over your parchments you know.

Oh and call Hermione that one more time and you won’t be able to sit down for a week.

Weasley



Weasley,

You pompous ass! How dare you look at me like that. Rest assured you will no more opportunities.

And what’s up your ass about the beaver? Is she unwilling to give you a mudbath?

Parkinson



Parkinson,

I warned you.

Weasley



Weasley,

You son of a bitch! I know that was you in the library. Who else would risk Ms. Pince’s anger but sneaking up and spanking me. And you didn’t get away free you know, I saw that ginger hair as you ran off. Did you think you’d be able to do that without me seeing.

This is not over Weasley. I’ll find a way to get even, you had no right to put your hands on me.

Parkinson



Parkinson,

Now, now, I thought you claimed to be a lady. Such language would surely not come from a lady right? Besides I did warn you didn’t I? Insults will only get you so far before you have to eat your words.

So Lady Parkinson, do your worst. Although keep in mind that I enjoy a bit of witch handling.

Weasley



Parkinson,

What do you call that? Revenge? Tripping me in the great hall is not that big a deal. I’m not that noble and dignified that a tripping hex would ruffle my feathers or my character. I trip all the time and injure myself.

Did you notice that nobody cared when it happened. Hell the Slytherin table wasn’t even paying attention.

Weasley



Weasley,

Just seeing you fall flat on your face was enough for me. I enjoy a simple revenge that I can smile at when I think about it, and you falling on the floor with your bag and parchments flying all over the place was hilarious.

And I was paying attention from the Slytherin table. I’m the only one who needed to be paying attention.

Parkinson



Parkinson,

Simple revenge? Tripping is enough or you? You must have low standards if that’s all you need for revenge.

Weasley



Weasley,

Fuck off.

Parkinson