Table Etiquette

Hermione Granger made her way down to the kitchen of number twelve, Grimmauld Place. It was dark and quiet; everyone else was asleep as it was well after two a.m. Hermione couldn’t sleep; in fact, she was wide awake. She’d had a migraine earlier in the afternoon and decided to take a nap to get rid of it instead of taking a potion. She must have been more tired than she realized and slept right through dinner. She wondered why Harry or Remus didn’t wake her.

The witch made her way to the freezer and pulled out a pint of chocolate ice cream that she’d hidden in the back so no one would find it. She grabbed a spoon from a drawer and started eating the ice cream straight form the carton.

“That is not a healthy dinner, Miss Granger,” a silky voice purred from the end of the table.

Hermione jumped. “Professor Snape, you startled me. I didn’t even see you over there.”

“Obviously,” he said sneeringly.

“What are you doing sitting in the dark, sir?” she bit back at his snarkiness.

“That is not really your business. You really should eat more than that rot.”

“Thanks for your concern, but I’m fine,” Hermione snapped.

“Hermione, you are not fine. You slept for eight hours this afternoon. Harry and I thought we were going to have to take you to St. Mungo's,” Remus said as he appeared in the doorway, looking very concerned.

“Look, I’m fine. I just had a bad day, that’s all,” Hermione said as she took another bite of ice cream.

“Miss Granger, you haven’t left the house in two months, except to go to work. You don’t even go out with your friends anymore, not that I blame you.”

Hermione rolled her eyes at her ex-Potions master.

“What Severus is trying to say is you need to go out and have fun. You’re only twenty-five; you should be out on a Saturday night, not falling asleep at six p.m,” Remus said softly.

“Well, that and also you need to eat a better dinner than iced cream,” Severus said as he gestured to the carton still in her hands.

“What are you, my parents now?” the witch snapped.

Remus winced a little. Her parents were the reason she was living with Harry and Remus. Her parents had decided to get a divorce three years ago. It was a long and messy process, and Hermione was thrown in the middle. She refused to take sides, and they had been giving her hell ever since.

Hermione had started to slip into a depression during the last year. She stopped going out on dates and spending quality time with her friends. She stayed at home all day and night and just read. She’d begun to isolate herself from everyone else, even her co-workers and roommates. People weren’t even sure that she was aware of what she was doing to herself.

But there were two wizards who had noticed the witch’s downward spiral, and they were determined to pull her out of it.

Severus walked to the fridge and removed a bowl of fresh fruit. Remus came up behind Hermione and removed the ice cream from her hands.

“Mmm, chocolate, my favorite.” He grabbed the spoon from her hands.

“Remus, give that back, I’m not done with it yet,” Hermione whined.

“Yes, you are, until you get something else in your stomach.” Severus moved towards her with the bowl of fruit.

Hermione tried to get away, but Remus wrapped a strong arm around her waist from behind to keep her in place.

Severus moved in front of her. He pressed a fresh strawberry to her lips. The witch reluctantly bit off a piece of the sweet berry, feeling like a helpless child.

Hermione stood there trying to figure out what was going on. She never thought in her wildest dreams, (or was that fantasy), she would ever be caught between two of her ex-professors, who were giving her all the attention in the world. The witch wasn’t sure what was going on, but at the moment she wasn’t complaining. The stress that her parents had put her through the last few years started to fade away.

“You thought nobody would notice,” Remus whispered in her ear as Severus fed her a piece of pineapple.

“But we noticed,” Severus said.

Hermione was in a daze. She was vaguely aware of Remus kissing and licking her neck. What were these two grown men doing to her? In her mind she was screaming that this wasn’t right, that this wasn’t really happening.

But it was happening.

“Let us help you. Let us help relieve your stress,” said Remus, or was it Severus? All Hermione could do was moan. Professor Snape set down the bowl of fruit and undid the sash of her robe.

“When did you two become such good friends?” Hermione whispered.

Remus chuckled, and Severus smirked at the aroused witch.

“When we realized that we care very deeply about same woman.”

“And that we would do anything to make her happy.”

“That’s one lucky girl.”

“Yes, she is,” Remus whispered in her ear. “But we are the lucky ones if she will let us have her.

“Hermione, let us teach you how to relax,” Severus pleaded.

“You called me Hermione!” the witch gasped in surprise.

“That is your name, isn’t it?”

“Yes, but you’ve never called me by my first name.”

“Well, get used to it because I plan on using your name with excessive frequency tonight.”

Hermione moaned, and Severus kissed her lips for the first time. He tasted the sweet fruit on her lips. It was a soft and sensual kiss, not what you would have expected from an ex-Death Eater.

”Is this really happening?” was Hermione’s last coherent thought before her two soon-to-be lovers began their “lessons” in teaching her how to relax.

“First lesson, Miss Granger, is learning how to clear your mind of all stressful thought,” Severus explained in his best teacher voice.

“And how am I supposed to do that, sir?”

“By distracting that beautiful mind of yours,” Remus whispered as he removed her robe the rest of the way off her body. She was left in her knickers and a tank top.

Severus lifted Hermione off the floor and set her on the edge of the table. Remus traded places with him and stepped between her legs, taking her face in her hands and kissing her full on the lips.

His kiss was different from Severus’. Remus was more demanding and slightly more forceful, coaxing her mouth open by tracing her lips with his tongue.

Hermione moaned loudly. She’d always wanted Remus to kiss her like this.

Hermione felt a large hand squeezing her breast. A sharp pinch of the nipple made her gasp, breaking off her kiss with Remus.

“Severus, I don’t think she is completely distracted yet, do you?”

“No, Lupin, I think we need to move on to lesson number two.”

“What’s lesson number two?” Hermione asked in wonder.

Severus smirked at her, “Muscle relaxation.”

Remus chuckled at her confused expression. “Let me demonstrate.”

He started at her toes, massaging each one. And then he moved to her foot, giving it a thorough working.

Little sounds of pleasure were coming from Hermione, and Severus began to massage her shoulders and neck, causing the witch to roll her head from side to side.

“You are very tense, Hermione; you have knots the size of cauldrons on your neck.”

Remus was moving up her legs, massaging the muscles as he went along. He looked up at Severus before he continued north. The Potions Master quickly nodded his head in approval, knowing what the werewolf was planning on doing.

Severus continued massaging Hermione’s back working his way down, paying special attention to her lower back.

Remus abandoned the massage and started to kiss the rest of the way up her thigh. He gently spread her legs wider and ran his tongue over her panty-clad folds.

Hermione jumped in surprise, gasping, “Oh, fuck.”

“Tsk, tsk, such language, Miss Granger.” Severus helped Remus remove the rest of her clothing.

Hermione was completely nude. Not that she noticed, as the two men were doing a very good job with their “lessons.” All she was aware of was the feeling of two sets of hands on her body giving her more pleasure than she had ever known.

Remus didn’t waste any time. Seeing her naked before him snapped what little control he had left; he dove right in, tasting her for the first time.

“You taste like heaven, Hermione.”

All she could do was whimper at the sensation; her mind was quickly becoming a puddle of lust.

Hermione couldn’t hold her head up any longer; she fell back, her head hanging over the other side of the table where a very naked Severus meet her eyes. “I didn’t even notice him stripping,” Hermione thought for a brief second.

“Oh gods!” Hermione whispered in awe at her ex-professor. He was a stunning example of the male species.

He knelt over her and gave her a bruising kiss, much different from the one earlier.

In the back of the witch’s mind, in the very back, she was starting to wonder who these “lessons” were really for. Well, that and Snape could really kiss.

Remus took the opportunity to quickly shed his clothing while Severus was distracting their beautiful goddess

“Severus, you must taste our girl. She’s sweeter than honey.”

Remus and Severus traded places. The Potion Master knelt down between Hermione’s legs, parting her plump, pink folds, gazing at her womanhood for the first time. His mouth watered; he could smell her musky sent and see the moisture dripping out of her. He couldn’t wait to taste her.

A very loud cry escaped from Hermione’s lips as Severus feasted on her pussy. She grabbed onto Severus’ head, holding him in place. Her other hand grasped Remus’ hard cock, squeezing it. The werewolf growled loudly in approval.

She brought him closer, taking him into her mouth, tasting the salty pre-come that had already escaped his throbbing head.

Remus wound her hair around his wrist, tugging lightly as she took him deep in her mouth.

Severus slid a finger into the witch, causing her to moan, sending vibrations up Remus’ cock, triggering another growl from the werewolf.

They were a sight to see. Two grown men giving a special woman unbelievable amounts of pleasure. Hermione was giving little sounds of approval, which were muffled around Remus’ cock. His eyes were closed in ecstasy as he squeezed her breast, pinching her rosy nipples. Hermione’s hand in Severus’ hair tugged lightly as the wizard feasted on her pussy.

Severus could tell the witch was getting close. He didn’t want her to come yet. He wanted to be inside of her the first time she climaxed.

He moved off of her mound and kissed his way up her stomach, nipping at the soft flesh. He suckled on her nipple while squeezing her breasts.

Remus pulled out of Hermione’s mouth, not wanting to come yet either. “I think we should move on to lesson number...Oh, bloody hell, I can’t remember.”

Despite herself, Hermione laughed; she couldn’t help it. She never knew Remus could get so undone before.

“I think a change of position is in order.”

“You can still think? I not even sure I’m talking right now,” Hermione joked.

“Well then, our lessons have done their job,” Severus said as he yanked Hermione off of the table. Unfortunately, he pulled her off a little too fast, and he stumbled and fell to the floor, bringing Hermione down with him.

“Not exactly your most graceful move there, Severus,” Remus laughed.

“At least I got her where I wanted her,” he snapped back at the werewolf.

“Were you two drinking before I came down?” Hermione said as she straddled her Potions Master.

“No, why would you ask that?” Remus joked as he knelt behind her.

“Enough talk. I want to feel Hermione squeeze around me.”

“Well, since you put it like that, Professor, how could I deny you?” Hermione sat up and grabbed Severus’ very hard cock and plunged down in one swift move.

“Oh, you sweet witch!” Severus moaned as she started to ride him. “So fucking tight.”

Hermione’s eyes fluttered closed at the sweet sensations.

Remus moved closer to the couple and started kissing her back, making has way down to her buttocks. He gently pushed her forward so he would have better access to her puckered hole.

Hermione stiffened when she felt Remus’ tongue at her tight opening.

“I've never done that before. I… I’m not sure….”

“Shh, don’t worry, you will enjoy it; trust me.”

“Just relax, Hermione.”

Remus conjured a bottle of lubricant, and he started to work one finger in. Hermione moaned in pleasure at the new sensation. She’d never felt anything like it.

Remus worked in a second, then a third finger, stretching her tight muscles. “If it hurts too much just tell me to stop; I don’t want to hurt you.”

Severus distracted Hermione by kissing her as Remus replaced his fingers with his hard cock.

“Relax, Hermione, this will feel really good in a few seconds.”

Hermione hissed in pain at first. Her muscles tried to push Remus’ cock out. Severus flicked his finger over her clit, which allowed Hermione to relax enough for Remus to push the rest of the way into the witch.

“Oh, gods, that feels incredible.”

Remus chuckled, “I knew you would like it.”

They moved as one. Hermione had never felt so completely full in her life. These two wizards were giving her such unbelievable pleasure. Why didn’t she think to do this sooner?

“Harder; please, I need more.”

“As you wish,” Severus said, thrusting harder into her quivering body. Thankfully, Remus matched Severus’ rhythm and speed.

“Oh, gods, not sure how much longer I’m going to last.”

“Come for us, Hermione.”

“I want to feel you wither around us.”

Hermione cried out as her orgasm hit her hard. “Oh, Merlin!”

“Ride it out, Remus. I want our girl to come one more time before we are finished.”

Remus bit his lip riding out Hermione’s orgasm. Her muscles were squeezing him so tightly he wasn’t sure he would make it.

“She’s so tight. So damn sexy,” Remus grunted out between his clenched jaws.

Severus was gripping Hermione’s hips so tightly she was sure there would be bruises come morning.

“We should have done this months ago when we first realized how sexy she was,” Severus huffed.

“She is still in between you guys!” Hermione piped up after coming down from her high.

“‘She’is getting bossy again. Do we need to repeat our lessons?”

“Oh, gods, please!”

Severus snickered. “I’m sure we can give more lessons later. Now, I want to finish what we’re doing.”

“I believe our girl has finally learned how to relax,” Remus grunted as he picked up his rhythm along with Severus.

The only sounds coming from the kitchen were groans, moans and the slapping of skin from the three lovers.

“Can’t last much longer,” Remus moaned as his pumps became erratic.

Severus massaged Hermione’s clit with his thumb, coaxing her to another orgasm. He wanted the three of them to climax together.

Hermione’s moans were getting louder, and she knew she wasn’t going to last much longer.

Hermione could feel her two lovers moving rapidly inside of her.

Remus was the first to tip over the edge, screaming Hermione’s name as he shot his seed into her.

Severus was the next to climax, bringing Hermione with him.

They collapsed on the floor in a pile of sweaty limbs.

After a minute, the lovers disengaged from each other.

Severus was the first to speak. He scooped Hermione in his arms and turned to Remus. “I think we should continue her ‘lessons’ upstairs in your room.”

“I think that is a good idea,” Remus replied.

“Ah, excuse me. Don’t you think you should ask me what I want?” Hermione pouted, not liking that they were making decisions for her, but though secretly enjoying being put into the position.

They both turned to her. “No.”

“Men!” she yelled while a playful smile formed on her lips.

Severus carried her up the stairs to Remus’ room.

Remus was right behind them with the ice cream and bowl of fresh fruit. “Right, what lesson number were we on?” he said as he kicked the door closed.



A/N: This was written for the Hermione Smut exchange for ellaselenelupin on live journal. I hope you enjoy this little tale of Hermione, Remus, and Severus. This is the first time I have written these three together. Thanks to my two very wonderful betas who gave me a few pointers when I got stuck halfway through.